Chapter 35 Reversed 3 of Swords

Reversed 3 of swords, reversed 8 of cups, seven of swords

~~~~

Tim got out of his SUV and listened to the silence of the ranch and the gentle shushing sound of the falling snow. He was about to carry the bag of groceries inside when he heard a shriek from Cassandra's. It was her voice. He would know it anywhere. He left the bag on the porch and got back in his SUV. He slid as he drove along the fence line too fast. He almost slid into her gate trying to stop. Getting out, he rushed up the drive, sliding in his boots. He cursed at himself silently for not changing into the tread-soled work boots he normally wore on the ranch when he wasn't riding or driving.

He rushed up to the front door and knocked then pounded when he didn't see her. Miss Priss the cat came out of the cat door, looked at him then went back inside.

"Cassandra? Cassie! Open the door!"

He shook the handle uselessly then hurried around the house peeking in the windows trying to catch a glimpse of her. The snow was falling so quickly he couldn't tell if one set of tracks or two came back from the garage that had become a barn for Audie the bull. His heart was pounding like he as having a heart attack as he made it to the rear sunroom. The outer door was unlocked. He hurried into the sunroom but the door into the cottage was locked. He knocked.

"Please answer... Please be okay."

Inside, he saw her step out of her recording room, so he knocked again, and she jumped. Staring at him in panic, she pulled a pistol out of her pocket and whipped the end toward him. Tim dove for the floor, praying the terrified woman wouldn't accidentally kill him as the glass in the door exploded outward and showered him.

"Cassandra! Don't shoot! It's Tim."

"Ohgosh, ohgosh! I... I didn't know... Are you hurt? How did you get inside?" Cassie demanded in almost hysterical panic as she knelt next to him on the broken glass.

He reached over and eased the pistol out of her hand. "I'm fine, Darlin', you left the door unlocked."

"That's not possible," she declared, leaning away from him. "I locked it. I'm certain I locked it." She looked at the hole in the metal frame by the exterior door. Tears began to leak from her eyes as she realized her fear almost killed the man she loved tonight.

"Why did you scream?" Tim asked.

"What?" She looked back at him.

"I heard you scream all the way at my house... I thought the worst. I was afraid that lunatic found you and was hurting you again." He touched her face, and asked again, "Why did you scream?"

Sobbing, she put her arms around his neck, then admitted into his collar. "I got mad because I'm tired of being afraid... I'm so sorry, I could have killed you."

"Oh Darlin'," he murmured, hugging her for a long moment.

Cassie let Tim hold her grateful he was alive to hold her. Her knees hurt from kneeling on the floor but when she shifted her weight, she felt something cut into her. "Ouch." Pulling back, she stood.

Tim stared in surprised shock at her knee, the cursed, "Crap! You're cut." He looked at her knee carefully, after he helped her to sit down. "There's a piece of glass in it. You're going to need stitches."

"I... I won't go to the E.R.," she refused.

"I'll take you to Grandpa Cordell." Tim went to the kitchen, grabbed a hand towel and a roll of packing tape from the desk. "We gotta put something over it first." He pressed the towel over the wound the wrapped it with tape, then warned, "Don't tell him you tried to shoot me."

Tears welled up in her eyes. "I'm sorry," she whispered in shame.

He took her face in his hands and kissed her. "Do not ever apologizing for defending yourself. I would rather be shot dead, than know you didn't try to fight back if that bastard found you again."

"Really?"

"Yes," He went and got her heavy snowboots and eased them on then helped her to stand, "Can you make it to the gate? My SUV is there."

She nodded, then limped with him through the house. She pulled on her coat before they went out into the gently falling snow. The crunch of the snow under their boots and the shushing of the falling snow were the only sounds.

Tim drove straight to his grandfather's house. Cordell opened the door before Tim had the chance to get Cassandra out.

"Tim?"

"Cassandra broke some glass and called me to come get her. When she bent down, a few pieces got in her knee," Tim lied as he carried her inside. It was a struggle because she weighed almost as much as he did, but he was determined to do it.

Cassie listened to the lie he told to protect her and wanted to weep more. He should just have her arrested and put away. Her paranoia had almost turned her into a murderer. Tim placed her on a heavy oak table.

"Cassandra, is it okay if I touch you to cut away your leggings and clean your injury?" Cordell asked in the tone he had used with wounded animals and people since before World War Two.

She nodded shakily, "Yes, Dr. McConnell."

Tim held her hand and she turned her face into the shoulder to avoid seeing the numbing injection given in tiny needle pricks before the old doctor turned Veterinarian began. He picked out several pieces of the cubic shaped glass pieces, cleaned the wound and put stitches in her knee.

"There, Cassandra, that should be fine. I will need to come check them in a few days and take out the three stitches in a week or so. You should only have a few minor scars unless it becomes infected. I am going to give you some special soap and antibiotic ointment but don't remove the gauze of get it wet for three days. I usually suggest wrapping plastic cling wrap over it to shower." Cordell smiled gently as she stood gingerly. "Now, do you want to tell me why you shot at my grandson and broke a window in your home?"

Tim cringed as Cassandra stammered, "I... I..."

"She didn't mean to. With that stalker and murderer back in the area, it is better that she be armed so she can defend herself," Tim made the excuse then explained, "It's my own fault for startling her coming out of her studio."

Cordell frowned. "A person still needs to be aware of who they are shooting at before they pull the trigger... You are safe on my ranch, young lady. Be more careful."

"I'm so sorry," Cassie apologized with her shoulders pressing down.

After an uncomfortable several minutes of silence she shifted her weight and winced at the slight pain in her knees. When she lifted her gaze, Cordell was looking at her with a sadness that was different than she knew from other people's gazes. It wasn't pity, it was a deep concern. He glanced at Tim, so Cassie turned her head slightly and was surprised that Tim was also looking at her in the same way. Suddenly, she realized it was the worry for a patient that might never recover and her heart broke. They had lost hope in her ever getting well, just as Erin had. She had tried, she wanted to be well so badly.

"Can Tim take me home now?" She whispered. She longed to shrink into a ball and become invisible. She swallowed her want to weep because she couldn't let go of her fear. She would never be able to love Tim or be with him like a real wife or girlfriend. "Please."

Tim reached out to help her and she let him because she was already making up her mind that this was the last time she would accept his kindness. The handsome rancher and geologist deserved someone who could stand at his side for the rest of his life, not hide in a tiny hole of her box canyon like a hummingbird nesting in a crack of a cliff. She was silent as he drove.

"Are you okay, Darlin'?"

Inhaling slowly, Cassie made herself speak around the lump in her throat. "No. I could have killed you tonight. You were just worried about me and coming to check on me and I almost shot you because I am too afraid to be considered sane." Looking at her clenched fists, she made herself flex her fingers before finishing. "I don't want you to come to my house anymore. I was a fool to think I could get over my fear enough to love you." She got out as soon as he stopped.

Standing in the dim light of the interior illumination, she looked forlorn despite her bright yellow coat and the white fur trim around her face. "Goodbye, Tim."

"Cassandra, wait... Lloyd and I will catch him. You'll be safe, you won't have to be afraid anymore," Tim promised desperately.

"But I will be. I always will be." She closed the door and limped through the snow to the house without turning around.

Breathing in through his mouth and out through his nose did nothing to calm him as he sat in his SUV, then his rage got the better of him and he stomped to the door. It was locked so he knocked loudly. When she didn't answer, he walked around to the back. She was sweeping up the glass. The sunroom door was locked.

"Cassandra, open the door and talk to me."

She refused to look at him as she bent to her task of cleaning up the tiny cuboid bits of glass.

"Please, open the door."

Ignoring Tim, Cassie took a box she had gotten a delivery in and cut it apart. Taping the pieces together, she fitted it over the hole as he begged her for a chance.

"Don't do this, Darlin'. I love you."

Her hands froze then she made herself finish her work without looking at him or wiping the tears running down her face. Going inside, she shut the door, then began closing the curtains in fear he would come to a window. He continued to knock and plead with her, so she shut herself in her recording room to hide like she had the night she was attacked. All her courage and bravado from earlier, evaporated like a cup of boiling water thrown into ten-degree Fahrenheit air. She didn't know when Tim left; she tried not to care as her self-loathing devoured her hope.

Tim watched her fixing her door as he continued to plead with her until she went inside and drew all the drapes. His soul felt colder than the still air. The snow had stopped so the temperature plummeted as the clouds cleared. Unable to feel his hands or face, he went back to his SUV and drove home with a broken heart. Laying in bed, trying to get warm, he didn't sleep. He just thought about Cassandra and how right it felt to hold her and kiss her. How he loved her voice, and her laugh, and the smirk she got when she knew she beat him at cards. He was glad he didn't have to keep Sheridan for Tiana today then he remembered she was working dispatch at the Sheriff's office while their Aunt Ruby was away. He got up and started the coffee. Too soon, the sun was edging over the mountains into a stark, clear blue sky.

~~~~~

Jan 1

Despite the hour, the doctor greeted Jay the same way she always did when he woke. "Good morning, Mr. Doe. Are you hungry?"

"My name is Jay, Jay Lancaster," he muttered defiantly. Shifting, he realized he was wearing a clean diaper and hospital gown. He eyed the tray she sat down suspiciously.

The doctor tipped her head at him as she had every day for the last week, but her words surprised him, "I have something to show you."

She held out her phone, showing him the image of the hard copy of the real Jay Lancaster's police trainee photo. "This is the real Jay Lancaster. He is someone you murdered when you killed his sister June. The bodies may have been too burned to identify but we know how you killed June, and that it was her brother in the house when it was destroyed and not Dakota Wilson. Please, who are you really?"

His jaw worked as he shook his head, wondering how long it took Matthias to drive to Montana, but he insisted vehemently, "I told you the truth. I'm Jay."

She held up a spoon of cooled stew. Begrudgingly, he accepted it as she retorted, "No, you did not... If you want me to believe anything you say, you need to be honest and tell me your real name." She offered him a bite of a grilled cheese sandwich. "Your real name is the place we need to start," the doctor insisted.

Swallowing, he looked at the mirror. "Is he watching?"

"No, someone else is." She smiled, then she raised her hand and there was a tap. "But you aren't allowed to talk to anyone except Matthias or I."

"I have rights." He snarled then bit the sandwich aggressively.

"So did those people you murdered," the doctor responded, lifting the spoon again.

"They deserved to die, they were sick... all of them," he explained between spoons of the stew. He repeated the narrative he had created. "They loved those books, idolized that filth. If you read their chats, you would see that I am right."

"And yet, you published all the Mayibe Chained books. So that makes you just as sick, doesn't it? Why did you kill them using their favorite scenes?" The doctor observed.

"You can't trap an animal..." he paused for a moment realizing he was spouting his late uncle's words, then finished quietly, "without bait." He pressed his lips together, refusing the next bite she offered. He wasn't sure if they had injected him with something or if it was in the food, but he didn't mean to say that.

"That is true. Did you consider those women and men to be just animals?"

He gritted his teeth to stop the answer that wanted to come out.

"Who taught you to think of people that way? If you talk about it, explain it to me, I might be able to help you. Get you removed from house arrest," she offered. Ten minutes passed before she spoke again. "What about Dean Markham?"

"That rapist," Jay raised his voice, insisting fervently, "I had to stop him from hurting Audra, he wanted her for himself."

"There was no evidence that he ever sexually assaulted a woman, just a few complaints about him saying inappropriate things," she refuted him.

"He wouldn't keep taking no for an answer. He bragged to me how he drugged women and then sent them away before it wore off," Jay revealed, "He just needed them to meet him for a drink somewhere. He and Jake were in on it together."

"Can you prove it?" She demanded, "Or is this another way you give yourself justification to kill them?" He shook his head but said nothing because he wanted to rant about them being like his uncle.

"Keep? You talk about him like he's still alive. Did you want to become him like you became the others?" The doctor suggested in the form of a question. "Like you became Jay Lancaster?"

"I didn't become Jay Lancaster, I am Jay Lancaster, I don't know who that other guy is, maybe someone switched the pictures. There are pictures of me in my training class online." He snapped, angry at his lapse.

"Pictures that have been proven to have been altered. We have copies of the digital originals and, after a series of interviews, none of you instructors or classmates know who you are, Mr. Doe," the doctor's voice was patronizing as she revealed, "And since none of the original known associates of the identities found in your house know your face, it is safe to assume you aren't any of them... It was however interesting that you knew enough of the men you impersonated to convincingly take over their lives in a manner that no one knew they were dead. You even told your new association their childhood and youth stories."

Her next revelation shook him, and he realized how close they were to learning the truth, he began to sweat as she lectured him, revealing much of his carefully crafted reality.

"You impersonated Richard Dook of Tennessee, who inherited a horse farm from his murdered father. No one had met him since he was a boy shipped off to boarding school, so it was easy enough. Allegedly, he killed himself after his girlfriend died attempting to have relations with his stallion. He was a known associate of James Lyles who moved to California suddenly after Richard's death. A year later, you as James got married, then you killed his wife on their honeymoon and burned their rental cabin which caused the fire that destroyed thousands of acres of forest and Lawrence Mays' home and job. The real Lawrence Mays of California had almost died of an allergic reaction to strawberries as a child, but you as Lawrence loved strawberries and became a roommate of Darrell Wilson while attending college. Both of Lawrence and Darrell supposedly burned to death in the fire that destroyed a small town in California where they were visiting Darrell's girlfriend who also is still missing.  Tell me where they are? What happened to them? Did you start the fire to cover your crime and it got out of hand?"

Claire took a sip of her tea, waiting. After a few minutes, she continued.

"Darrell's twin brother Dakota Wilson was so traumatized he moved to Montana, with the story and another of how they had been abused by their foster parents. That leads us to June and Jay Lancaster. Dakota Wilson stalked her, but it wasn't the real Dakota. At the same time, Arvada resident Darrell Wilson traveled and worked until he was wanted for questioning in a Denver homicide where a popup house party ruined all the evidence. Both of the Wilson twins told the same stories, used the same histories, claimed their brother died with Lawrence Mays. But really, no one has seen or heard from the real Dakota or Darren in four and a half years. Witnesses in Montana and Colorado have identified you as both men."

The man glared at her. "You don't know anything about me."

"We have tracked your movements back eight years. It's an amazingly complicated and convincing façade you've created but we are now tracking a dozen missing men that you as the other people were associated with. We have enough evidence to convict you for the four murders here in Pagosa County. There's nowhere left to run, no one left to become. Don't you want to talk about how and why you do it?"

He looked at the mirror instead, staring at himself, not speaking.

"You fooled so many in law enforcement for years. Even worked as a cop, a security guard, a cyber security consultant with federal security clearance. There are spies, sleeper agents who aren't that good. But we have you now, and those in charge want answers... Who were you before then?"

She sat in the room for another thirty minutes then stood when there was a tap on the glass. "Do you need anything before I leave?"

"Yes, I want a lawyer and I want to be released from these restraints." He hissed through gritted teeth.

"Tell me your story," the doctor demanded. "Tell me your name."

She left without an answer and he hated her. He vowed he would find a way to free himself and kill her. He would put a knife in her heart then burn her body for Matthias to find. He could start over. They would never find him again, and to prove he was better than they were, he would kill everyone except Matthias. He would take his beautiful diver and enchanting scientist with him right under the retired FBI agent's nose. He still had at least one identity they hadn't found and a place to go only an hour away. It was close enough, he just needed the opportunity to escape from his manacles. 

~~~~~

A/N: Hello, Lovelies, 

I will be gone for a long weekend with family things. Do you want the remaining chapters now or on Tuesday? 

Mama Magie