A/N to my Indonesian wattpad readers, I post my original story @suhaa_alhasnah it's all in Indonesian. Please read and follow me.

When you handed her breakfast, she told you that she'd like a second time with you.

You wondered if she was being nice but you couldn't pass up the opportunity. You don't know if she wanted you because she genuinely wanted you or if she just wanted you as a toy, but you took her offer anyway. Because she made you feel like you were something, or rather, someone. You haven't had that feeling in quite a while, not since your twin's disappearance. Even with your twin's return, it doesn't return the feeling of being alive as they came back different.

Your sister's love made you feel alive, but seeing her tell you that it's a lie kills you. You hope this one doesn't.

OoO

You prepared yourself as you are going on your date with her.

You wear a white turtleneck with a black suede jacket- your sister told you that combination looks good on you- and black trousers. She signed to you that it makes you look like a gentleman. You didn't joke that the dick you buried within your date that your mother sculpted for you made you feel more like a man, you know it's not your place to joke. The jokey sibling award goes to your drug-addicted sibling. Your sister kissed you as she comments how dashing you look, though you see her eyes glassy.

You left the Umbrella Academy to meet up in the park, looking at the watch you inherited from your father- you remember your siblings wonder why would you keep such things- to make sure you are on time. You can never come late, not even a little bit. Old habits die hard. You felt a few taps to your back, causing you to turn your back. You saw her, radiant as ever with her soft black hair and deep dark eyes that draw you in. You let her hug you before you do, minding the amount of power you put in your hug.

She holds your giant hairy hand and intertwines it with her delicate, tiny one. She directed you to a bench, resting her head against your bulky body. She asked you to tell her about yourself, and you find yourself struggling to answer. You told her that you like poetry and sketching, you told her that you're a newly-appointed astronomer, you told her that the moment in the rave was your first time doing drugs and your first time doing sex. She giggled at that, said she felt honoured that she took your virginity. You can't help but wonder if you wanted to.

She told you that you're the opposite of who she'd been imagining- the athletic, flirty, fuck everything type of guy- and she likes a bit of a challenge. You don't ask her what she means, though you had a feeling she meant that you are not the type of man she likes. She told you that she's exactly what you saw- that she's a drug dealer, she's like you as she has a liking for sketching, and she likes watching romance shows. She asked if you also like watching TV, and you find yourself shaking your head. She said she'll bring you to her flat for Netflix and chill, whatever that means.

OoO

To your surprise, your brother came to visit when you were reading in the living room. You asked what does he want, he shook his head and responded with an elusive answer, but you knew who he wanted to visit. You told him that your mother is recharging in the art gallery if he's looking for her, and he can talk to her in a few minutes. He asked you how far has it gone with your girlfriend, you answered that you don't know if you deserve to call her your girlfriend yet, as she hasn't allowed you to call her that.

Your brother looked at you like you are the weirdest man in the world and mentioned your 'escapades' with her, and asked why on Earth do you need her permission to call her your girlfriend. You mention that though yes, you've had sex twice with her (your brother whooped at that and you find yourself even more uncomfortable than before), she hasn't allowed you to call her your girlfriend, so you won't. He decided to leave it at that. He pats your back and told you that he's glad you're finally living for yourself.

OoO

The next time she asks for a date, it's in her flat. You know where it is, you've been there a couple of times. You feel that bringing a bottle of vodka is appropriate, so you do. You bought some vodka from a nearby store. You don't buy her champagne or wine, you know she likes the hard stuff. The last time you were at her flat, you were prepared some vodka before she turns on the TV. Your sister commented that this relationship goes so fast but you don't care, at least someone wants you.

When she lets you in her flat, you see her flat was already pretty clean and nice. She takes the vodka from your hands, thanking you and leading you to her sofa. You feel grateful when she opens the bottle and drinks it straight from the bottle (you learned from yesterday that she prefers drinking straight from the bottle), then gave you the bottle to drink it also. You are getting in need of another round of alcohol in your system. She also offered you the familiar-looking pills that you took yesterday- how could you say no when it's offered to you like that?

As you can feel yourself getting high, she told you that she got something that she thinks you'll love, whatever that is. You allow her to do anything to you, you had no power to refuse. She started to strip her clothes to her matching pink underwear and shaking her arse in front of you persuasively, and you find her body so beautiful you have no other words. She leads you to her bed and told you to strip as well, everything before she pushed you to the bed. She tied your hands with her pink fluffy handcuffs and you find yourself chuckling at how well she knows you like it. She started to take off her underwear and you find yourself unable to look away from the sight of her breasts.

OoO

The next time your sister comes to your place, she asks if it was going well with your girlfriend.

You answered that it is, it's going very well with your girlfriend. You ask about your niece, if she has made any progress with her. She answered that she has, she has visited her last week and she'll visit her again. You feel so happy for her that you offered for a hug, and she ran to hug you. You still don't understand what it's like to love someone as much as your sister loves her daughter, so you asked her to describe the feeling, what does it feel like to love someone more than herself.

She looked up for a moment, trying to find an answer, before trying to answer your question to her best ability. She signed that when she watched her darling's milestones, her heart swelled with pride, and when her baby was taken from her, she felt like she couldn't breathe. She felt like she was dying every day, and how there are moments when she wished she is dead if that meant having her sweetheart visiting her again. That's what loving someone more than yourself feel like.

As you read her explanation, you can't help but hope that you'll get there. Someday.

OoO

Your girlfriend called to have coffee in a café and you find yourself agreeing, even though the idea of going to a public space mildly discomforts you. No, scratch that. Heavily discomforts you.

You came to the café she wants you to be, ignoring the looks on your huge body. They'll mind themselves, they'll forget you exist. They'll forget you entirely like you never existed. For you have served the purpose of your life, to save the world, and you're just waiting for another world-threatening event so you can put a stop to it because that's all you're good for. That's why you were dubbed Number One. You may try, but you will always return to serve your purpose in life.

You heard a chair being pulled and smiled as you see your girlfriend sitting across you, calling your name and asking you what have you ordered. You sputtered that you forgot to order anything, your mind quite distracted. Your girlfriend said it's ok, asked what you'd like. You answered black coffee, the first thing that came out of your head, taking out some cash. She told you that the bill is still open, don't you know how to order in a café? You're so weird.

As she left you behind to order your drink, you can't help but wonder what she had said about you. You know you're so weird, your siblings call you weird too. You don't know basic interactions with the outside world, you don't know basic etiquette, you don't know anything other than Umbrella Academy life. You don't know how to function in life without orders. You don't know who you are without anyone decides who you are. Your father decides you're a soldier. Your mother decides you're a child. Your siblings decide you're weird. Your girlfriend too, apparently.

Returning to her seat, your girlfriend told you that she loves you despite your monstrous body and you are her everything. You smiled shyly, feeling flattered at her words. She takes your hands and kisses them, telling you that these hairy, rough, black, ape-like hands are yours and she had never kissed any other hands like it, that's what makes you so unique in her eyes. You told her that you love her, that you don't know what you'll do without her. She gave you a taste of life and you wanted to keep on having it. You want to keep having her.

She asks you if she can move in with you because she loves you and she doesn't want to be apart from you. You find yourself agreeing to her statement, for the only ones living in your mansion now is your twin, your mother, and your father's companion. They wouldn't mind, for you are the heir of your father's belongings.

OoO

After helping your girlfriend move into your house, she sits in now both of your bed, looking at the room. She stared at the hanging aeroplanes with such dismay and told you that it should be taken down, you look so childish with it. You complied with her order with ease, no need to grab a ladder. Just extend your arm to the ceiling and it's already down. As you feel the aeroplanes in your grip, you sighed before throwing it into the bin. You feel a jab in your heart as you love your little hanging aeroplane so much, seeing it away hurts you too much.

You felt a hug from behind and knew it came from your girlfriend, who can it come from other than your girlfriend? She made you turn around and kissed you, whispered to you that you're better without it. She'll make your life better and more colourful. You told her that you know, you agree. That is what a little boy would want in his bedroom, not a man like you are. What she doesn't know is that it helps to alleviate your gender dysphoria when you were younger and it helps you when you miss your siblings, for it has seven aeroplanes.

You're a man, you reminded yourself. It's time to do manly stuff. It's time to grow up.

OoO

When the two of you had breakfast in the mansion, your mother asked what can she prepare for you.

Your girlfriend wanted eggs, bacon, and pancake, and asked what do you want. You don't want anything, your mother knew you don't want. You introduced your mother to your girlfriend, who smiled at her as she prepared the full course meal for your girlfriend, preparing you vanilla-flavoured meal replacement shakes. Your girlfriend offered you her meal but you refused, sticking with your meal replacement shake. She commented on how young and beautiful your mother looks and how nice this mansion looks, interior-wise.

You talked about how this mansion was inherited to you from your father, with you being the most loyal to your father and the one who knows the most about this house. But occasionally, your siblings crash here, namely your twin and another. You didn't tell her how similar she is to your other sibling. You also told her that your mother was technically not your mother, she is a robot made by your father to play the role of your mother. That's why she doesn't age. She'll also see a talking chimpanzee every now and then, he's your father's companion when he was alive.

She wanted a tour around the mansion and you find yourself agreeing to her request. This is her house with you, she needs to know inside out.

OoO

When you and your girlfriend were taking seconal capsules with a bottle of vodka in your room, a blue light suddenly flashed in front of you, shocking you as you bump your head to the bedpost behind you.

You curse as you reminded your twin that you'd like your space, and your twin chuckled at the sight of seconal capsules and vodka bottle in your room, saying you've become your sibling. You see your girlfriend sneered at the sight of your twin and you beg your twin to leave your room. But instead of complying with your request, your twin looks around your room, giving it a scrutinising gaze. They mentioned you loving the seven hanging aeroplanes and starry wallpaper and asks you why'd you remove them.

Why do you care, you asked them. Maybe you chose to grow up and see that hanging aeroplanes and starry wallpapers are what you'll find in a boy's room, and you're a man. You have a job as an astronomer, you have a girlfriend, you've already become a man. A true man, free from the clutches of your father. You hear your twin snickered at that, but decides to leave you alone as they blinked away. You told your girlfriend you're glad it's over. Your girlfriend asks you if your siblings are this intrusive. You don't answer.

OoO

Your girlfriend came to the room you both share after a shower. You cracked your knuckles as you feel nervous about what will happen next, for you decided to come out to her. She deserves the truth about you, a vital part of you that she doesn't know. Your girlfriend asked you what's wrong, and you told her to sit opposite you, for you need to tell her something about yourself.

You told her slowly that you're not born in this body, both body of a human-ape and the body of a man. You told her that your human-ape body was a result of a near-death experience, where your father had to inject you a serum to revive your dying cells with the side effects of turning you into... this... You also told her that you (and a lot of your siblings) are transgenders. You specifically are a trans man, you came out at seven years old and having finished with the necessary operations in your late teens, having to do testosterone shots yourself in the bathroom.

She kissed your lips and told you that she doesn't care, for you are a true man in her eyes. She's happy that you managed to survive the near-death experience, even if you end up with this body. You are a wonderful man and she loves you. She loves that you so willingly obey her will, unlike her exes. She loves that you're so innocent. She loves that she's helping you to be a man.

OoO

When your sister visits you, you welcomed her to your mansion.

She asks if they can go to a café or something, for she wants to visit you but she doesn't want to be in the mansion. Your girlfriend suddenly appeared and hugged your sister, saying that you are very high and she fears you'll be a hazard to society. You wanted to correct her and say that you aren't that high, but you decided to let it be. Your sister looked confused for a moment and asked you that she didn't know you drink and take drugs now, which your girlfriend says you do and she needs to take good care of you.

Your sister begged for just an hour, at the very least, since you have quite a high tolerance and you don't seem dangerously high yet to her. After a moment of persuasion, your girlfriend finally relented as she decides to let you out, with the note that you may only be out for an hour. You asked your sister if you may roll her wheelchair before you do, going to the café nearby. You don't like cafés and public spaces, but anything for your family and your girlfriend.

You got a table for you and your sister, asking what she'd like to order. She said she wants a matcha latte and a croissant, and asked what would you order. You said you'll have black coffee, you have eaten already with your girlfriend. She wants you to maintain the muscles that you once had before the moon and you can't afford unnecessary calories. Your sister fought that a croissant or a Mexican coffee bun won't ruin your look, but you insist on staying strict to your diet.

When you returned from the counter, you asked your sister how's her life. She told you that she's doing great, she's working as a second-chair violinist in her orchestra. She also told you that she started to date someone and you found yourself congratulating her and asking about how did she meet her date. She answered in a park when her date's son was playing with his ball and his ball hits her wheelchair. It went from there, and they both agreed to meet again tomorrow.

You find yourself so proud of your sister that you almost pat her back but you didn't. Instead, you congratulated her and expressed how happy you are for her. You don't pat her anymore, not since what happened. You start treating her like a frail woman whose wishes needs to be fulfilled at all costs because you can't afford her being the White Violin and almost causing the apocalypse again. She asks you about your girlfriend, she said she thought you're asexual. You told her that you thought you're asexual, but now you don't know what you are.

You two kept chatting, unaware of the time. You watched as another customer leaves and you checked the time, seeing that you've been there for an hour and a half. Shit, you cursed. You need to go. You paid your half of the café bill, thanking your sister for her visit as you rush back home.

OoO

As soon as you rushed back home, you are faced with your unpleased girlfriend.

You naturally apologised for your tardiness and explained how you lost track of time talking with your sister. Your girlfriend wasn't pleased with you and told you to follow her. You don't know what will happen, but you know you better be there. When your girlfriend walked to one of an empty room, you complied like a dog you are. When she told you to enter the room, you complied like a soldier you are. When she locked the door, you feel your guts plummet.

She didn't ask a fuckton of questions, you have a feeling that she knows you didn't lie. What she did ask you to do is to sit on the bed, and you did so without question. She wants you to give her your hand, so you did. She grabbed her fluffy pink handcuffs from the table nearby and tie each hand to a bed corner, and grabbed her belt, she tied your neck to the bedpost. She kissed your cheeks and told you good luck with your drug withdrawal later before she gets up, locking the door behind her.

You tried to break free from your girlfriend's fluffy pink handcuffs without damaging them, for you don't want to damage any of her belongings even though you know you can break them very easily. But you can't, both hands are tied down and you can feel yourself being choked by the belt if you move too much, so you tried to move as little as you can as you just laid there. You tried to calm your panicking heart, your girlfriend will let you out, wouldn't she? She's not cruel, she's a good woman, unlike your father was.

You can only wait for so long before you can feel your hands twitch even worse than before. You cursed, your last use was a few hours ago and your girlfriend has both the capsules and the alcohol, not you. You can feel your heart pounding in your chest despite your attempts in calming yourself down, you can feel sweat trailing down your body despite the season being autumn, you feel like someone is hitting your head with a mallet. You need to be let out, you need more.

You saw you and all of your siblings, happy and still alive and still together. You must've been- what, 7? 8? You side-hugged your twin like they're the best person in the world because they were the best person in the world. You had your other hand on your sister who looks so awkward but so glad to finally be included. You see your other sister hugging you from behind, along with your brother. Your sibling and your brother are sitting on the ground, hugging each of your legs. Your mother was smiling above you, kissing your head. Your father was not at sight.

You miss the time when everyone loved each other.

OoO

When your girlfriend decides to let you go, the first thing you do is sit up and wait.

You don't hug her, you don't kiss her, you don't ask for more seconal capsules or vodka (despite you very needing them now), you don't leave the bed, you don't go to the kitchen, you wait very still and patiently- or as still as you can, with your tremoring body. You wait until she gave you the 'go'. She takes your hand and tells you that she's sorry this happened to you, but it must be done. You will grow more insolent if you are not controlled from now. It's all for the good of this relationship. You nodded as you smiled at her, saying it's ok, you understand.

She stood up, leading you out. You let your hands travelled along the walls of the mansion, your home since you were a little boy until you are a man. You were brought into the kitchen to eat with your girlfriend, and it isn't until your mother brought it up that you knew it was the next morning. That's weird, you met your sister in the afternoon. Your girlfriend made the excuse for you, saying that you went to bed so early you skipped dinner, and you find yourself agreeing to her statement. Your mother didn't question it further.

You suddenly feel very insecure about your tremoring body.

OoO

The next time your sibling comes to visit you, you are cuddling on the longest sofa with your girlfriend.

You opened the door and greeted them, letting them enter the mansion. You asked how are they doing. Your sibling told you that it's he/him day and he's feeling quite good, asking you how are you feeling and how is it with your girlfriend. You told him it's going great, for both questions. You asked your brother if you can get him anything, let it be soda or coffee or drugs, for your girlfriend has a stock of a variety of drugs hidden in one of her suitcases. His refusal felt off to you, for you at the very least know your brother wouldn't normally reject drugs.

Your brother asks for a moment between you two somewhere and you told your brother to wait, you need to ask your girlfriend's permission. Your brother looked at you like you're the weirdest man on Earth, but decides to let it go as he waited for you to go to the sofa, seeing your already unpleased girlfriend. You kissed your girlfriend's palm and cupped it to your face, apologising for taking your time so long and that your brother wants to talk with you. Your girlfriend tried talking you out of it but you promised that it's within these walls. Her final offer is that she's with you the whole time, and you agreed.

You walked to your brother and told him that your girlfriend wants to meet him, and allows you two to talk in her presence. Your brother interjected, saying that he wants this between the two of you. You told your brother that it's either that or none at all, so your brother relented and went to the sofa with you, greeting your girlfriend with a smile that feels so fake even you can tell. You thought he would've liked her since they're pretty much alike. Turns out he doesn't even come close, none of your siblings do.

You sit next to your girlfriend as you let your hands be intertwined with hers, your brother sitting opposite you two. You asked what was going on with him. He stares at your girlfriend in dismay, probably hoping that she'll leave the two of you alone, your girlfriend held your knees as she softly asked what's wrong. He sighed, he told you that he impregnated a Vietnamese woman and he doesn't know what to do, you're the first person he tells. He's been trying his best to be there for the mother, be sober the whole time and tried to help her be there, but he feels he's not doing enough.

You asked him, what more can he do? What more can he do but be an active father? He's already doing his best, hasn't he? Isn't his best good enough for now? You told him that your mother would've loved to hear that she's becoming a grandmother again, and your sister would've loved to know that her daughter would have a friend to play with. Your brother smiled as he rushed to hug you, a feeling you've missed for a very long time. You miss your siblings' affection and finally, finally, you're growing to be a normal family.

OoO

When you and your girlfriend were in your room together, your girlfriend asked you if you would marry her.

She told you that your siblings have gone far with their lives. Your sister has a child and is about to enter a new relationship, your other sister has a girlfriend, and your brother is going to have a child. Isn't it time for this relationship to progress? You've known her for quite a while and you love her, don't you? You brought up your finger problem because they're not human-size and no jewellery shop would sell rings your size. Your girlfriend says she can get a custom ring, so are you up to it?

You said yes, you are. You are always up to whatever your girlfriend (now fiancée) says. Your fiancée squealed and hugged you, giving you a huge kiss. Once apart, she told you to get ready. She knows a jewellery custom place and she wants you to be ready to go for ring-sizing. She takes from her wardrobe a black-and-pink pencil dress and prepares you a pink turtleneck with a black suede jacket, and long black trousers. You commented on how beautiful she'll look in a white gown as you kissed her, taking the clothes from her before you leave the room for the bathroom.

On your way, you meet your mother who asked you where are you going to go with the clothes in your hands. You smiled as you kissed her hands, telling her that you've just gotten engaged and you're going for ring-sizing. You told her that your fiancée knows a place where custom ring sizes can be made, so your ring size can also be made. Your mother said her congratulations as she hugged you softly, though you feel it wasn't so genuine as her smile wasn't as wide as usual. But yet again, her smile has never become as wide ever since your fiancée joined the picture.

OoO

As it happens that the wedding date will be in January and it's Christmas, you and your siblings agreed to celebrate it in your mansion. You've told all your siblings about your engagement and their reactions varied from obvious fake smiles to outright outrage, but you ignore them. You're sure they are just trying to keep you from your fiancée for some reason. It's ironic to think that they want you to get a life outside of your father but oppose it once you do.

You helped your fiancée zip the back of her sparkly silver mermaid dress before she turned to face you, hands-on your black turtleneck and silver sparkly blazer, wearing silver trousers. She kissed your lips, telling you how she wished you had been cisgender so she can bring a mini you into this world, for she wants to build a family with you and it's impossible. You hugged her body, for silence is sometimes stronger than words may be. You regret you can't give her what she wants. You told her that your siblings are waiting downstairs and it's time to greet them.

As you walked down the stairs, you see your siblings are talking together. You see your sister chatting with your twin, your sister's boyfriend with your sibling who's carrying their son, your other sister talking with your brother, and your other sister's girlfriend with your brother's girlfriend, no one notices your presence. It's not until you proclaim your presence that they turned towards you, more fake smiles at the sight of you and your fiancée. You also see your mother with your father's companion.

You greeted them all and kissed and ruffled your niece's curly hair, your niece hugging you as she dubbed you her favourite uncle. You chuckled as you kissed her head, waiting until she ran back to her mother. You went to your sibling, running a finger to your nephew's soft, chubby cheeks. Your nephew held your rough, large, hairy finger, and you find yourself even more in love. You got to a seat next to your sibling, your fiancée sitting next to you. You noticed how your sibling's and your twin's facial expressions turned to sour as soon as your fiancée was nearby.

As your mother prepares all of you eggnog, you ask your sibling how's parenthood been. Your sibling told you that it was a struggle and his cries kept them up at night but they love their son and they'd never exchange it for anything in the world and you find yourself craving for that sense of normalcy. You know people like you don't get normal but you can't help but long for that feeling. You want to see your fiancée become your wife and fit in easily with your siblings, you want to see your wife soon-to-be carry and bear your children, and you can finally have the normal family you've been longing for so long.

You wonder what your fiancée had said to you, if you had been cisgender and she can carry your children into this world. Will the baby be quarter-ape as you are half-ape? Will the baby have super strength as you do too? Will the baby be completely, utterly human? You hope they'll be, but you'll never know for that'll never happen. You've had a hysterectomy, phalloplasty, and the serum has made you infertile anyway. The only way you can hope for a child is through your fiancée. You wonder if it had been better this way, that way the child will not inherit your freaky powers.

Your twin pats your back and tells you to come with them. You told them that you need to ask your fiancée's permission, but your twin assured you that you can go as you see that your sister is talking to your fiancée, her boyfriend as the translator. You nodded, letting your twin take your finger as you two blinked away. When you open your eyes and look at your surroundings, you notice you are in your twin's plain, no-nonsense room. Your twin sat on the bed and urged you to do the same. After sitting, you asked your twin what is it.

Your twin went straight to the point. They told you that you can't marry your fiancée. Not because of her drug habit, they know you're drug-addicted too, but because she's abusive to you. You tried to refute their claim but they elaborated before you can. They listed out all the proofs they have, from not letting you out of her sight to using drug withdrawal episodes to punish you whenever you've done anything wrong. They've tried finding the time to tell you this earlier so you've not spent a lot of money, but what they got is now and they're not wasting it.

You tried to change the subject, asking how can she allow them to talk to you without her nearby if they know she wouldn't allow it. Your twin was speechless as they look around nervously, and you kept pressing the question. You also lift the fact that you notice it was Allison who she was 'talking' with, and you went straight to the point as you asked if she rumoured your fiancée so they can have this talk with you. They didn't answer, but silence sometimes screams louder than words ever can as you instantly knew what your siblings did.

You grabbed your twin by the scruff of their neck with ease, lifting your twin is like lifting a pillow of feathers. You leave the room and just before you descend the stairs, you drop your twin from the first floor to the ground. You know your twin will be fine as you rushed to your room, heading for your drawer. As you ran down the stairs to find your fiancée still chatting with your sister. You tap your fiancée's back and waited for her to turn and face you before you hug her and kiss her. You whispered to her ear that it's time to announce the fixed date.

You tried to have your siblings' attention with calls of announcement, noting that your twin is now amongst them. Good, this will make it so much easier. Once you do, you announced that the wedding's fixed date is 8th January, exactly two weeks from now. You've got the catering, the ring, everything ready. You also took out the invitations that you took from the drawer, handing them to your siblings. Your siblings' reactions were to smile and congratulate you, though they've made no attempts in congratulating your fiancée nor smile at her.

Once the others are gone, you force your sister to free your fiancée from her rumour. Your fiancée doesn't understand what's happening, but you told her to wait until later.

OoO

When you and your fiancée were alone in the kitchen, you apologised.

You told her the truth, that your sister rumoured her to let you speak with your twin without her. You told her everything your twin told you. You told her how you didn't believe your twin and you kicked them out. Your fiancée argued that it's not enough, that they should be killed. Your fiancée requested you to kill your siblings, that should be easy with how strong you are and how close you are with them now. She wants you to truly love her and only her, and she doesn't want anything at all to get in the way, disapproving family spouting lies being one of them.

You doubt to give your answer, for you truly love her and don't want to let her go. She helps you be the man you are now, not the boy under your father's shadow. She showed you the world you never got to see with your father, she showed you a world full of love. She taught you that you are still lovable despite this change that always made you feel horrible. She made you feel complete. But on the other hand, you love your siblings. They were distant from you because they saw you as an embodiment of your father, and when you shed your skin (with the help of your fiancée), you realise how truly great your siblings are. They care for you, they joke with you, they show you their vulnerability, they know you.

You expressed your answer, even though you know your fiancée won't like it.

You watched as your fiancée's face turned red from screaming how she doesn't like being second to your damn family. She will be number one to your heart, she will do whatever it takes. You yelled back how you still love her with all your heart and she is number one in your eyes, but you won't murder your siblings. They'll have to love her if they love you, but you are not killing them. Your fiancée scoffed, mocking you so weak and sentimental, and that your love for her had all been but a lie. You tried to tell her that it's not, and she challenges you to prove it by killing your twin who happens to live in this mansion too.

You walk down the hallways, your legs feel like jelly the further you go into your twin's room. You know what you ought to do, crush your twin's skull into pieces. That should be easy, shouldn't it? You are trained to kill. Your father trained you to be heartless. Your father trained you to destroy dummies of your siblings, should they turn against your father and arise a need to end any of them. You were emotionless when your brother died, as your father expected. You have trained for this your whole life. Smash their skull, it should come off easily for you.

Yet you can't, for some reason. This is the person you spent your first thirteen years of your life with joking and quarrelling about petty things, like which twin is the better looking between you two or which constellation has the most tragic backstory. This is the twin who helped you construct what would your biological mother look like, help you sneak snacks for your dates with your sister (even though they outright say it's very weird), loved you. They still love you. You can't repay their love by doing this.

You returned to your room, seeing your fiancée. You told her that either she has to settle with your family or you'll call off the wedding. Your fiancée grabbed the nearest vodka bottle and smashed it into you, screaming how the fuck are you so weak. She screamed that you're so fake and you're horrible. No one will love you as she does. You screamed back at her to stop with the tantrum and grow up. You are not telling her that the wedding's off, you are telling her that you will not kill your twin.

Your fiancée got up from the bed before she jumped at you, repeatedly punching your head as she pounds it to the wall, causing your rough feet to bleed as you step on broken glass shards. You scream in pain as you pushed her off you, feeling your hair pulled. Your fiancée cries as she lands on the ground and you see that she has landed on the glass shards from the broken vodka bottle, causing her hand and fingers to bleed. You watch in horror as you crouch down to hold her hand, apologising profusely at your fiancée and telling her that you still love her.

Your fiancée scratched your face, causing you to be taken aback as you feel blood dripping from your face. You heard a flash and you know your twin has blinked into your room. Your twin warned your fiancée to get out of your life and never be in contact with you ever again or they'll kill her, you see that they hold a gun in their hands. You see your fiancée eyes the gun before trying to disarm your twin as if they'll let go of their gun that easily. Both of them fought over the gun, your fiancée hit your twin's stomach before aiming the gun at them.

They jumped and hold on to her neck, causing her to roll and fall at the same time she has switched on the security lever on the gun before they both stood up, your fiancée kicking your twin very far away. Your fiancée stumbled upon the gun and fired, aiming at your twin. But you pulled your twin, switching their position with yours, letting the bullet embed itself in your hard stomach. As you fall into your twin's embrace, you distinctly hear your twin's orders to stay awake, but why is it such a challenge for you to do so?