No, your eyes are not deceiving you. I really wanted to get this out for you guys, so I didn't edit/proofread, so please excuse any mistakes <3

September 29, 2028

Maya

The best summer of her life. Maya could hardly believe that the past few months had truly happened. Going on fun trips, attending the coolest parties, making new memories and friends she'd hold dear forever, and most importantly, getting the sweetest girlfriend to make all those memories with. It felt like a fever dream. A blink, and April had turned into September. When did the leaves turn brown? When did she start wearing sweaters again?

Katya yielded and drove past Starbucks, so Maya cradled a decaf Pumpkin Spice Latte in her cold hands as the city flew by. She loved fall, loved bundling up in sweaters and coats, loved the prospect of Halloween, loved the bright colors of the leaves and the crunch when she stepped into them. But she couldn't help but reminisce about summer and wish her second to last year of high school waited a few months to begin, because it was odd to be back into that routine.

The past few months, she was away more than she was home, driving Brooklyn and her friends around the state in her Mustang, the top down, the music up, and their laughter ringing in her ears. They cooled off by the pool, chased after adrenaline at the amusement park, lost their voices at concerts and festivals, and celebrated her birthday somewhere in the middle of it, too.

Her moms jokingly complained about her absence, but she could see how happy they were for her, urging her to accept invitations because she was ''only young once''. She was living the teenage life they never had, and instead of getting jealous or bitter about it, they supported her like every child deserved to be supported.

There'd be fifty dollars snuck into her wallet despite the money she made working at a yogurt shop, or a coolbox waiting by the front door filled with fruit and water for her trip to the pool. They were the best. From her first paycheck, Maya bought them the biggest bouquet of sunflowers she could find, just to thank them for everything.

Unfortunately, summer didn't last forever, as emphasized by the misty rain falling onto the windshield of the SUV. School was hardly kicking her ass, but Maya had trouble with the long days of sitting still again, of tolerating her rude classmates and dreary teachers. Homework and assignments were already piling up. She had to find new ways to make her life exciting outside of work and school. Hanging out with her friends was one thing that helped, but today, she was doing something very different.

''Toilet break?''

Maya tore her eyes away from the window to meet Natasha's gaze. Her mom was turned around in the passenger's seat, smiling as she looked between the two girls in the back. She'd let her hair down today. It cascaded down her shoulders like a waterfall. Maya liked how it made her look younger than the braids or ponytails. ''I don't really have to go yet.''

''Me neither.'' If Maya's body wasn't hyper aware of her girlfriend at any time, it was easy to forget Brooklyn curled up against the other door, a book inches away from her face. She sat so still, so lost in the world of magic and fantasy, that they hadn't spoken with each other in an hour. They were experts in that, spending time together without talking. Sometimes, they'd sit side by side for hours, each reading their own book, until it got dark and they had to go home.

''Well, I do,'' Natasha mused, zipping up her jacket as Katya pulled up at a gas station. ''Come, let's get some snacks and you can stretch your legs.''

''Do we have to? It's so cold and rainy,'' Maya whined, scowling at the weather. It was warm inside the car, and dry, and she'd gotten Starbucks half an hour ago so she really didn't need something new to feast on.

Natasha raised her eyebrows, a smile playing on her lips. ''Your coat isn't waterproof and doesn't have a hood?''

Maya glared at her, crossing her arms over her chest defiantly. ''I don't appreciate the sarcasm.''

Natasha chuckled. ''I once walked through torrential downpour for four days in just my mission suit. No hood, no umbrella, no shelter, just the Canadian forest. I think you can survive walking ten steps to the store.'' She pushed open the door and stepped into the rain.

Maya expected her to make a run for the building to hold open the door for everyone, but instead, Natasha popped open an umbrella and ran around the front of the car in a hurry. She scowled playfully at Katya when she opened the door herself instead of waiting, and quickly shoved the umbrella above her head, shielding her pin-straight hair from the relentless raindrops. Katya grinned, a lovestruck look in her eyes as she kissed her wife's cheek in gratitude, whispering something in her ear.

''Then why does Mom get an umbrella!'' Maya yelled.

Natasha ducked down to look into the car, a light blush on her cheeks, no doubt from what Katya just told her. ''Because she deserves royal treatment.'' She teased.

Maya would never get over the love those two had for each other, the chivalry, the romance, the perfect amount of give and take, the care, the respect. They'd act like ten-year-olds one moment, throwing pillows at each other, and like eighty-year-olds the next, linking arms and opening doors and drinking tea on the porch. But whichever it was, they were always in balance.

Brooklyn expectantly turned to the redhead next to her, a twinkle in her eye. ''Where's my umbrella, Maya?'' She asked, putting her on the spot.

They all chuckled, and Maya felt her cheeks start to glow. But she forgave Brooklyn instantly, because her smile was so joyful that it knocked her right off her game. Blew her socks off. She stumbled over her words to find an answer, looking away from the blonde in the hopes that would help. It was nice to have her girlfriend integrated in the family so well, but not always beneficial.

''Don't fluster my daughter like that, Lyn,'' Katya scolded her through the open door, grinning widely.

Brooklyn let out a chuckle. ''Sorry, Kat.''

Maya finally huffed, taking this opportunity to escape and stomp to the gas station, yanking her hood over her hair. More laughter followed after her, but she paid it no mind, already set on purposely choosing a type of candy her moms didn't like and not sharing with her girlfriend for a full sixty seconds after she pulled the packaging open. She wished she was stronger, but those brilliant blue eyes had a hold on her.

''Wait, was that story about Canada true?'' Brooklyn hurried to catch up with Natasha. Whenever they mentioned something about missions or their past spy life, she was eager to know more. Her eyes widened when the woman nodded. ''How did you not die?''

''Shot a moose and ate it.''

Brooklyn halted in her step, her whole face scrunching up in disgust. The drizzle fell on her golden hair like the early morning mist settled on spring gras, but that's hardly what she cared about. ''Ew, did you really?''

''Yes, it was quite good, actually.'' Natasha mused, clearly finding her horror entertaining.

''She makes it sound like it was a really cool thing, when in reality she looked like a filthy, drowned rat when we picked her up in those woods,'' Katya said.

You had to know her to spot the tilt of her lips, the teasing glimmer in her eye as she kept walking like she hadn't insulted her wife, Natasha's hand on the lower of her back to keep her close, under the umbrella. She'd been pretty quiet until now, but she was always listening in, lighting fires wherever she could.

Natasha's lips parted in offense until her eyes narrowed challengingly. ''I'll show you drowned rat.'' The umbrella she so carefully held over Katya's head suddenly disappeared, her hand pointing it towards the ground instead.

''No, Nat!'' Katya shrieked, laughing loudly as she dove for the umbrella, pulling it back up. Natasha didn't put up a fight, pursing her lips to hide the smile that wanted to spread across her face.

''Watch it,'' she warned, but she subtly tugged Katya closer by the back of her jacket to ensure she stayed dry for the remaining three steps to the dry interior of the gas station store. Katya snorted anyway, undoubtedly recalling what her wife looked like after that mission.

They all exhaled in relief when they stepped into the warm, but more importantly, dry store. It was a small one, but the sign in the back said they had a toilet, so Natasha rushed off to empty the bladder that had been bothering her for a while. Maya wandered off to the candy aisle, stopping in front of the teeth-rotting sweet stuff. Her moms hated that.

Her eyes briefly flickered to the side when a bright presence stopped beside her. Brooklyn had her hands shoved into the pockets of her maroon jacket, a light smile on her face as she examined the options. Even in this gloomy weather, she was sunshine incarnate.

"What do you think we should get?" She asked, taking a package of cherry gummies off the shelf and reading the back before placing them back.

It took her another moment to notice Maya's indifference, the way she purposely ignored her. Maya hated how her stomach dropped when Brooklyn's smile faltered. They were just joking now, but she could never be this cruel to someone on purpose.

"If I let you choose, will you stop being mad at me?" The blonde pouted, enlarging her round eyes and pushing her bottom lip out further when her question was met with more silence. Her long eyelashes fluttered enchantingly, her voice going up an octave or two. "Pretty please? Pretty, pretty, pretty please?"

Manipulation in its highest form. She was dangerous, pure evil. A girl disguised as something else.

Maya hated herself. She really hated herself. Even seeing the whole thing from the corner of her eye was enough to get her heart racing, her resolve disintegrating pathetically. She was so weak.

With a sigh, she closed her eyes, refusing to see the victory on Brooklyn's face. "Fine. But I'm choosing." A quiet 'yeey' came from her side, followed by fading footsteps. When Maya opened her eyes and turned her head, she was looking at Brooklyn's back, a spring in her step as she went to explore the rest of the store. Her long ponytail swished over her back.

On the other side of the shelf, Katya snorted. "Боже мой (My god), Maya. You need to grow a spine. Can't give in every time a pretty girl bats her eyelashes at you."

Heat spread across her cheeks. Of course, her mother heard the whole thing. She could never catch a break. "Shut up. You give in to Mama every time." She glared in Katya's general direction, very grateful these shelves were high enough to hide her beet-red face.

"Certainly do not. If I did, she'd think she can get away with everything.'' The woman chuckled softly, the sound nearly overshadowed by the crackling of a package. ''No, no, someone has to put a lid on that woman's ego."

Maya knew she was barking up the wrong tree. She needed to speak to her other mom about blondes with pretty blue eyes that had the power to ruin both their lives. That mother gave in every time. She knew how hard it was to resist them when they played into their weak spots.

"Oh, they have fun sunglasses. Maya, come look!"

Curiosity washed over her, immediately pushing her thoughts to the back of her mind once Brooklyn called for her. ''Just a second!'' She sealed her fate of being a simp by grabbing one of Brooklyn's favorite sweets off the shelf and choosing another random one they all liked to try and cover that up. Before she could change her mind, she turned away and followed the sound of her voice, finding her with neon green cat-eye sunglasses on her nose, carefully spinning the sunglasses stand around.

''What'd you get?'' The blonde asked when Maya joined her side, pushing the sunglasses into her hair and eyeing the candy in her arms. Her whole face lit up when she recognized the packaging. ''Oh, I love those!'' She beamed, excited at the prospect of eating it. Maya knew she'd made the right decision then. ''Here, I found the perfect glasses for you.''

They must have taken a hundred selfies, giggling as they tried on all the odd shapes and colors of sunglasses. There was a pair with cannabis leaves, pineapples, palm trees, flamingos, beer glasses, and cute heart-shaped ones. Brooklyn managed to balance three sunglasses on her face at the same time at some point, receiving some disapproving looks from the grumpy man behind the register that they hardly saw in their laughter.

She posted the selfie of them with the heart sunglasses on her Instagram stories, tagging Maya and adding a simple red heart as a caption. Simple but effective. Everyone who saw it would be reminded that Brooklyn was taken. The number of views on her story climbed rapidly while the car continued its journey to the US capital. Her following was insane. The whole school followed her, including people from neighboring schools that knew her from popularity alone or from her volleyball competition. It was intimidating sometimes, but the knowledge that she chose Maya over all of those admirers, made Maya feel giddy. She chose her.

The last two hours moved very much the same as the first two. Brooklyn had picked up her book again after a while of scrolling through her social media, and Maya zoned out as she listened to music, closing her eyes for a minute. Sometimes she heard her moms' soft voices bleed through, Natasha in the driver's seat this time, her fingers loosely intertwined with Katya's, but they preferred to sit in silence too. Only the crackling of the candy packages was disruptive of that silence.

Maya glanced down at her phone when it vibrated, a text from Camila popping up on the screen.

Cam: You and Lyn are so disgustingly cute dude.

She smiled to herself, briefly eyeing the people around her, but nobody saw her stupid grin. Her relationship with her friends hadn't changed after she got with her girlfriend. Enough stories went around about girls who completely dropped their friends and then came crawling back after the relationship was over, but Maya made sure she spent as much time with them as she did with Brooklyn.

She wasn't sure what to answer Camila, so she simply thanked her and added a blushing emoji.

Cam: U nervous?

She hadn't been, but now that someone asked her about it, anxious butterflies surged in her stomach.

Maya: Not yet.

Cam: She can hold your hand if you do.

The added suggestive emojis did nothing but make her cheeks grow pink. When Maya asked Brooklyn if she wanted to come with her today, she'd said yes instantly. It was only later that Maya realized getting a needle pulled over the thin skin that stretched over her spine could very possibly bring her to tears, and humiliating herself was a very likely occurrence. She'd cried in front of Brooklyn before, once, when they decided that rewatching Bambi was a good idea, but that was different.

''Lyn.'' The girl picked up her head, a faraway look in her eyes as her mind lingered in the fantasy world she'd emerged herself in. It was Katya who called her name. ''Any news on the homefront?''

''Yes, any news on Mr. Ladykiller?'' Maya teased, smiling slyly as she locked her phone.

''Maya,'' Brooklyn whined, shutting her book. While she was really happy that the online dating profile she and Maya made for her father started to work in his favor, the idea of him as a lover was hard to get used to.

In all the years she'd been alive, she had never seen him hold someone's hand or even give a woman a lingering stare. He was just her funny, loving dad who didn't have a single romantic thought in his head. Now him going on a date reminded her that he had a need for emotional and physical company too, like everyone else, and that was weirdly unsettling.

She took her phone from her pocket to check her notifications. ''No, nothing.'' A bitter sigh left her lips. ''I still don't understand why he chose to meet her when I was gone. I need to vet her.''

''I can think of a reason he'd want you gone,'' Natasha pitched in from the driver's seat. Only Katya saw her annoying little smirk, very proud of the disturbance she managed to cause when a collective groan echoed in the car, specifically from the backseat.

''Ew. I do not want to think about my dad having sex.'' Brooklyn shuddered.

Katya snickered. ''Trust me, none of us do.''

''It'd be so cute if he gets a girlfriend, though,'' Maya said, smiling softly at the girl next to her. Harry had been so shy about the whole thing, but they saw him warming up to the idea of having a sweet woman to share his lonely days with. Because let's be honest, Brooklyn had a busy social life and wasn't home often. It's like he dared to have hope that an old bachelor like him could find that.

Brooklyn smiled back at her, a glimmer in her eye that caused Maya's breath to get stuck in her throat. She stretched her arm out across the middle seat, her empty hand lying palm up by Maya's thigh in a silent request. ''He's been talking about her a lot, and he smiles at his phone whenever she texts him, so I think he really likes her.''

Maya couldn't help but think there was more to her words as she placed her own hand in the blonde's soft one, her fingers enveloped by warmth. These touches had gotten so normal, she'd started to crave them. ''I hope it works out.''

~~~~

''Alright, we're here,'' Natasha announced, pulling into the parking lot. After a four-hour drive, everyone sighed in relief, eager to get out of the car. Maya reluctantly let Brooklyn's hand go, happy that the rain had stopped for a moment as she stretched out her body and took in a breath of fall air.

Washington D.C. Her homeland. Though it didn't feel that way anymore. The orphanage she grew up in was across the city, but it might as well be across the country. That's how distant that chapter of her life felt.

On a Sunday, none of the shops were open. None but one, the strong lights flooding through the big windows onto the darkening pavement below. Four PM and the sun was starting to go down. Everything felt out of place. Sunday was a day to relax at home, do nothing, watch movies, do some homework. Instead they set out for a road trip, and everything felt slightly out of time, like train stations at night or airports.

The nerves finally started to kick in when Katya knocked onto the door of the shop, waving enthusiastically to the guy in the empty studio. She and Natasha trusted him with their bodies, which meant Maya had no reason to be anxious, but she had trouble calming her pounding heart as she watched the man unlock the door, a big smile on his face.

''Katya,'' he greeted her like an old friend.

''Hello." She beamed. ''How are you?''

They exchanged pleasantries, shook hands as they stepped through the door. Maya was too busy letting her eyes wander around the studio in hopes of gaining back the breath in her lungs.

She loved art. Whether that was the art of writing, painting, sculpting, architecture, or in this case, drawing, she felt at home in places where it flowed freely. Dozens of sketches lined the walls of the big studio. From animals to athletes, flowers to dragons, geometric to elegant pieces, it was all there. Either chosen by people or ready to be chosen.

''This is Maya, and her girlfriend, Brooklyn.''

Miguel's gaze settled upon them, on the way Brooklyn was glued to Maya's side as silent support, the way their hands were nearly touching. He knew a comfort person when he saw it.

"Hello, Maya." He offered her his hand, which she firmly shook. "I see the apple didn't fall far from the lgb-tree." He winked to emphasize his joke, and Maya was laughing before she figured out that he was trying to settle her nerves.

"That is the worst dad joke I have ever heard. Oh, my god." Katya shivered visibly, trying to shake off her crawling skin.

Natasha snorted. "I thought it was funny."

Katya rolled her eyes. "Of course you did. You spend too much time talking to Clint."

"Hi. Nice to meet you," Maya greeted Miguel back, ignoring her moms' usual banter. She felt at ease around him instantly, which was a rarity around men. But he and Brooklyn's dad had a bit of the same aura around them; a kind family man first and foremost.

''Same here. You're all they talk about when they're here, so it's nice to put a face to the name." He rubbed his palms together as she straightened up, excitement creeping into his features. "Are you excited to get started?"

Nerves shot through Maya's stomach again, her confidence faltering a bit. "Yes. A little nervous, but..."

Miguel's smile softened. "That's totally understandable. But we'll do everything at your pace. I'll explain everything, what we're doing, how it's going to work. We can take fifty breaks if you need to. It's going to be just fine, okay? If you're half as unbothered as your moms are, you'll be fine."

"Okay." That made her feel a little bit better at least. "Thank you for doing this on your free day, by the way. And illegally."

He laughed, risking his hand to slap Katya on the shoulder. "These guys are my best, most loyal customers. I couldn't let them take you somewhere else just because of some government law. Besides, we have a very tight 'don't ask, don't tell' thing going on."

Maya assumed that was only logical. With the stories her moms' bodies told, they didn't want someone who asked questions over every scar. It would dig up unnecessary trauma.

"Come with me, we'll get started. You can take your support with you, if you want."

It wasn't a question if Brooklyn would be coming with—Maya wouldn't let her move from her side—but she looked over her shoulder at her moms, not really sure if they wanted to be involved as well. It felt wrong to just leave them out after they drove her here and set up the whole thing. But Katya grabbed Natasha's wrist and started pulling her towards the leather sofa by the window.

"We'll be here if you need input." She smiled. Somehow, that was perfect.

Miguel was incredibly patient with Maya. She sat down at a high table, Brooklyn's knee pressed into hers, as he explained everything and showed her the design again. He'd kept it saved for years, just for her, the same flowers as her moms had down their backs.

He measured the width and length of her spine, gave her the disclaimer that it could stretch a bit if she grew taller, but Maya didn't want to wait, and she didn't mind if the flowers got slightly stretched. They were hand-drawn anyway. Imperfections were the beauty of them.

"Alright, let me make a stencil. If you'll get your back bare for me."

She'd prepared for this. Her closet had a couple zip-up hoodies, so Katya suggested she'd just wear one of them backwards. That way her arms wouldn't get cold and her chest was covered as well. A genius move. Maya shyly stripped to her bra and slipped on the hoodie, pressing it to her chest with one hand as she fumbled to unhook the clasp on her back.

"I'll get it," Brooklyn offered, her soft fingertips brushing over the skin of Maya's back as she grasped the clasp and unhooked the eyelets. Maya hoped with every bone in her body that her moms were too busy chatting and sipping their coffee and tea to see this.

"Thanks," she responded, trying not to let her mind go to other activities where her girlfriend would be unhooking her bra.

It took two tries, but then the stencil was on right and she laid down on the black leather table on her stomach, the nerves that had started to settle bubbling back to the surface. It was going to hurt, and she wasn't looking forward to that. Brooklyn sat by her head on a seperate chair, offering her hand to Maya without having to ask.

"Squeeze as hard as you need," she said kindly, her bright eyes full of empathy. Where she had her doubts at first, Maya was very grateful she brought her along. Her affection for Brooklyn was a distraction from the nerves and the upcoming pain in itself.

"Okay, you ready?" Miguel asked. Maya had her head turned away from him, her green eyes staring at her girlfriend's angelic face, but she'd heard the rustling of plastic packages, the rubber gloves, the buzzing as he tested his machine, and she knew he was one word of consent away from shooting that ink into her skin.

"Bring it."

It hurt. Maya wasn't going to deny it. It was overwhelming at first, the thousands of needle pricks into her skin, the pain that shot down her spine. After a few lines, she got used to the level of pain and it became tolerable, but it never stopped hurting or turned into that annoying low buzz Katya talked about.

Sometimes the needle would hit a particularly painful spot and she'd tense, her fingers tightening around Brooklyn's until the point of pain for the other girl. But she never complained, silently wiping away a tear Maya hadn't noticed leaked from her eye. It didn't even hurt enough to cry, but her tear duct had a brain of its own.

"It looks really good so far," Brooklyn whispered as encouragement, her thumb brushing over the back of Maya's hand. "Three done."

Three flowers. If she focused, Maya could make out the shapes he was tracing. Petals first, stem last. But she tried to not focus on what was happening on her back, instead listening in to the conversation Brooklyn was having with Miguel while he worked. It worked wonderfully as a distraction.

She was really grateful for her girlfriend's social skills and ability to be extroverted. One question after the other smoothly rolled off Brooklyn's tongue, keeping Miguel talking so Maya didn't have to worry about keeping up conversation with him. Their relationship, school, sports, movies and TV shows, they discussed everything.

"Any plans for Halloween?"

Brooklyn perked up. "We're going to a party at my friend Luke's house."

"We are?" Maya asked with difficulty, her cheek squished against the table. She knew Luke. He lived in a big house in the suburbs not far from her. Perfect for house parties. He was alright.

Brooklyn's expression turned apologetic. "He just texted me the invite yesterday, I meant to ask but I forgot. He said I could bring a plus one, so if you want..."

"Sure." She tried to sound indifferent, but Halloween was Maya's favorite holiday after Christmas. Even if it meant socializing at a party, she would get to dress up and possibly match costumes with her girlfriend.

"Great! We'll think costumes later."

It felt like an eternity that Maya lay there. She couldn't wait for it to be over. Her back was exposed, her legs numb, her chest squished painfully, her neck ached, and her spine was on fire. In reality, it was probably only an hour or less, but she was so glad Miguel announced he was done.

"Go take a look. Slowly sit up. You'll probably feel dizzy for a bit. It'll pass in a minute."

Brooklyn shot to her feet and helped Maya sit up by gripping her upper arms firmly, keeping a watchful eye on her face. The world certainly spun. Maya felt so lightheaded she feared she'd pass out, eagerly accepting the cup of water Brooklyn passed her, taking a tiny sip. If it wasn't for the hands on her arms, she was convinced she was floating.

"Take your time," Brooklyn said softly, gently rubbing Maya's squished red cheek with her thumb.

She stood so close, between her knees. Her stomach was right there, and Maya was half tempted to close her eyes and rest her forehead against it until everything stopped spinning. She'd never done that before, but it was such a strong instinct that it caught her off guard, even in this state. Proof that the ability to love and be loved was present in everyone. She hadn't realized Brooklyn was such a place of comfort until now.

It took more than a minute before the dizziness went away, but then Maya eagerly hopped off the table and shuffled to the mirror, Brooklyn's hands never far away in case she fell over.

Her eyes had to adjust to what she saw. It was more than weird to see the black lines down her spine. Her skin had always been so pale and empty, a blank canvas ready to be painted upon, and now there was suddenly the black. The flowers were so delicate and the lines so neat.

A huge smile grew on her face, stretching across her cheeks. She turned to look at her moms, then her girlfriend, beaming at them before turning back to the mirror. She couldn't stop looking at it. It looked badass. "It looks so good. I love it."

"We're finally matching," Katya said. Maya's joy was contagious. Everyone was smiling, watching her turn in front of the mirror to get a good look at her back. This was what they lived for, one way or another. A happy daughter, a happy customer, a happy girlfriend.

Miguel just said one simple thing when Maya returned to him. "Welcome to the club."

~~~~

It was completely dark when they stepped outside, a cold breeze sneaking past the collars of their coats and jackets. Maya shivered, wrapping her arms around herself, feeling the tape and plastic on her back pull at her skin. The overall mood between the four of them was good, but everyone was tired as well, Katya suppressing a yawn as Natasha guided her towards the car with a protective hand on her back.

Maya's stomach grumbled loudly. Beside her, Brooklyn let out a laugh, ready to tease her for it. But then her stomach made noises too and they were both laughing, not denying that they were in serious need of some dinner. Maya's stomach had been in knots all day, so she hadn't been able to eat much. Now she could eat a whole buffet.

"Guest chooses." Katya said when they reached the car, her hand on the door handle. "Lyn, where are we eating? What are you feeling?"

She eyed the three of them one by one, hoping for a hint in their awaiting gazes. Nothing. But she'd joined dinner at home often enough to know they ate everything. "Mexican?"

A collective groan sounded within the group, but not one from disappointment.

"Mexican sounds so good right now," Natasha groaned. "Chipotle or Taco Bell?"

"Whatever is closest."

It wasn't exactly a cozy eating establishment, but they were all too hungry to care, wolfing down their food like they hadn't eaten in three days. Laughter went around, jokes were made, and Maya couldn't help but want to trap this moment in time.

It was everything she ever wanted, the future she dreamed of when she sat on her simple wooden bed in the dormitory of the orphanage, wondering if she was going to be stuck in the system until she turned eighteen. Just a number on a paper—although Katya's orphanages had never felt like that, it's what the government saw her as. Now, she was someone's entire world. Three someones.

The conversation went past her as she stared at them, the lump in her throat suddenly making it hard to swallow her food. She put it down and grabbed her drink, hoping her iced tea would make it go down.

Sometimes, it was hard for her to enjoy happy moments without her brain coming up with negative thoughts; how she was graduating high school in two years and seeing her moms way less once she started college, eating her meals alone instead; how she and Brooklyn may not be together in a year, and it'll be just her thirdwheeling her moms again.

It was childhood trauma of having everything taken away from her, Eliza had explained when it came up in their therapy sessions one time—Maya had been seeing her for a few months now. Her brain simply tried to protect her from more hurt. When Maya had asked how she could fix it, the woman had told her to turn those thoughts around.

So Maya stared at Brooklyn and imagined her four years older, the childlike roundings in her face almost gone, sitting beside her with the same bright aura. And opposite them would be her moms, just as strong and beautiful, all sitting around the dinner table at their house on a Saturday evening. She'd have taken the train down from college for the weekend to spend time with them.

"Are you okay?" Brooklyn's soft voice cut her out of her daydream. Maya didn't realize she'd turned her head and stared back, concern glimmering in the back of her blue eyes.

"Hm?"

"You were zoned out." Her hand landed on Maya's leg comfortingly. "Does your back hurt?" She was so sweet that it physically ached in Maya's chest.

"No, it's alright." She smiled, resting her cheek on her hand, hoping her inner conflict didn't show on her face. "Just tired." She saw that Brooklyn didn't believe her. Usually, that would lead to more questions, but maybe she cut her some slack because they were all tired.

"Okay."

Maya was embarrassed to admit it, but she fell asleep in the car with her head on Brooklyn's shoulder. She really tried not to, but she couldn't help it. It had been a long day of sitting, of anxiety, of suspense, of pain. With her belly full and the soothing hum of the engine, she was destined to lose the fight against her eyelids.

She wasn't fully asleep the whole time, though. Sharp turns, bright lights, a honk, she drifted in and out, never fully sure if what she heard was real. But she could have sworn Brooklyn was muttering the lines of her book under her breath, maybe reading to herself, or reading to Maya. Her voice was pleasant, even in a whisper.

""That was the moment I knew I loved you," he had said. "When that arrow went through your heart, and it might as well have gone through mine.""

It wasn't a quote Maya recognized. She'd have to ask her about that later, if the book she was reading was worth it, what the story was like.

A cap popped, the soft yet telltale sign of a marker gliding across textured paper. Brooklyn was highlighting the quote. Pink, because it was a romantic one. Then the cap clicked, the pages rustled, and she continued reading, but Maya fell away before the next sentence was fully spoken.

It could have been minutes, it could have been an hour until the next time she reached the surface. Time morphed into one incomprehensible blur, but she knew from her stiff neck that she hadn't moved, her head still nuzzled onto Brooklyn's shoulder.

Something had changed, though. A weight rested on top of her head. Not heavy, not pressing, it just lay there. And something tickled her forehead every few seconds, like a puff of air. Maya tried to wake up more to figure out what it was, but consciousness kept slipping away from her before she could grasp it. The weight was nice though, so she decided to just leave it, giving into the sleep.

Then, right when she felt darkness creeping up on her again, a bright flash turned the blackness on the insides of her eyelids into red. Maya flinched, more internally than externally, because her muscles were numb. Someone chuckled, followed by rustling in the front seats.

"With flash?" A voice hissed quietly.

"They're so fast asleep they didn't notice." Another quiet laugh. "Maya's drooling on her shoulder."

"Is she?" The first voice asked again, filled with amusement this time.

Yeah, was she? She didn't think her mouth was open.

"They're adorable."

"I know."

Maya had a feeling she should be embarrassed, but she was out before she could try to make sense of the situation. And this time, she didn't wake until someone actively tried to wake her.

"Girls." Soft fingertips brushed over her forehead. Maya stirred, furrowing her brows and letting out a groan when she felt her aching, stiff muscles. Her butt was so numb from all the sitting. "Girls, we're home."

Home? Maya sat up with difficulty and peeled her eyes open, feeling nothing but relief at the sight of her house. Her bed, a warm shower, nothing sounded better as the cold wind from the open car door blew over her sleep-heavy body. Natasha's face was close to her own, an adoring smile on it as the woman watched her come back to the world.

"What time is it?" Maya croaked out.

"Quarter to midnight." Natasha stepped back to give her space to crawl out. "Come on."

The disorientation was real. Maya looked around to find Katya and Brooklyn, as if she needed confirmation that they hadn't suddenly disappeared while she was asleep. Katya was already out of the car, doing a funny little run to the front door to escape the cold, the porch light flickering on when it detected the movement. But if Maya thought that was amusing, she hadn't yet seen the girl next to her.

Pale face, puffy and crusty eyes, an imprint of something on her cheek, Brooklyn clumsily fumbled for her seatbelt, the book open on her lap threatening to slip off. Her movements were slow, her head heavy like it took effort to keep it up. She was blinking and rubbing at her eyes, her hand freezing when she heard the quiet chuckle next to her. Slowly, she turned, her blood-shot eyes narrowing at Maya's face.

"What? Are you making fun of my sleepy face?" She accused challengingly.

Maya pressed her lips together to hide her smile, though she felt her eyes twinkle in the darkness. Seeing it from the front, her bedhead was even funnier, some hair sticking up on the side. "I would never."

The blonde didn't believe her one bit, her eyes narrowing further. "Watch it," she warned. "Or you sleep on the couch." Gathering her book and her bag from the floor, she pushed open her door and got out.

"This is my house!" Maya laughed, half her words cut off when Brooklyn closed the car door. She didn't even wait for her, following Katya's tracks into the house with her feet dragging on the gravel and Maya's amused yet flabbergasted gaze on her the whole time. Within the blink of an eye, she was gone.

Natasha shook her head when Maya got out of the car, throwing her door closed. "You don't want to go there, Maya, trust me," she mused, locking the car and stuffing her hands into her coat pockets as they walked up the driveway.

Maya looked to her mom, who she knew for a fact had been banned to the couch a few times. "Can she do that?"

A smile tugged on Natasha's lips. "Yep. If you pissed them off well enough to get banned to the couch, you can protest all you want, but it won't change a thing." She shrugged, completely unbothered. 'Happy wife, happy life', that's what she lived by. If Katya wanted her on the couch, then that's where she shall be.

"Are we spineless?"

Natasha laughed full-heartedly, caught by surprise. "It only bothers you if it bothers you. I don't care if people think me giving in to her means I'm spineless, or weak." Her shoulders lifted in another shrug. "Let me be weak if it means she feels how much I love her. I will not be shamed by anyone for having a soft heart. Not anymore."

A silence fell between them, her words hanging in the air. It wasn't the first time that topic came to discussion, not by a long shot. Natasha's huge weak spot for Katya was actually a point of playful mockery a lot of the time. She always accepted that teasing with a roll of her eyes and a chuckle. But as soon as the jokes had even a hint of seriousness in them, they weren't funny anymore. All her life, she had to hide away her soft, romantic heart. She was so done with people telling her how she could and couldn't love.

"Well, jeez. You didn't have to go on a rant. It was just a question." Maya grinned when Natasha looked at her, rolling her eyes and letting out a laugh, elbowing her in the side for being a smartass.

"You want a wise answer?"

"Didn't I just get that?"

"Thought that was a rant," Natasha countered smartly, chuckling smugly when Maya rolled her eyes this time. It was wrong of her to think she could outsmart the Black Widow. They both slowed down when they neared the porch, feeling like this was a conversation between just the two of them. "You have to learn to be spineless at the right moments, find that balance between giving in and standing up for yourself."

Maya nodded, soaking up any relationship advice they gave her. One of the things she was working on with Eliza, in fact, was to get more confident. "How do I find that?"

"Time. Experience. You're on the right path, though," Natasha encouraged her with a soft smile.

A huff escaped Maya's lips as she struggled to accept the compliment. "You're just saying that."

"No, honey." Natasha's smile grew amused. They'd stopped walking now, facing each other in the bright light of the porch. "You and Lyn have something real special. You understand each other on a deeper level. I know for sure you'll figure it all out together."

She'd never say those things to Maya if they weren't true. Maybe to others, people she didn't know so well, but not to her. If Natasha—a former spy and an expert people reader—thought they had something special, then they did.

"Get your asses inside! It's cold out!"

Their heads turned towards the house, but although they heard Katya's strong voice, they didn't see her brunette head anywhere. Not yet at least, because she would be dragging them into the house by their hair if they didn't come inside soon.

"Yes, ma'am!" Natasha yelled back, winking at Maya as they stepped through the door, perfectly making the whole point of the conversation they just had.

It wasn't long until Maya found herself in her bathroom in her pajamas, brushing her teeth and letting her mind process the day. Brooklyn was right outside the closed door. Maya could hear her stumbling around, talking to Mimosa in a baby voice, telling him how cute he was.

They made up. She wasn't going to kiss and tell, but she told Brooklyn her sleepy face was incredibly cute, kissed her forehead twice, and that was that. All she needed to do to get her happy again.

Smiling at the memory, Maya spit out her toothpaste, rinsed out her mouth, and reached for a towel. The tape on her back pulled at her skin when she did so. Right, she'd almost forgotten about the tattoo care.

Chewing on her lip in thought, she wondered how in the world she was going to get the plastic wrap off her back, gently wash the tattoo with water and special soap, and put healing cream on when she could barely reach it, let alone see anything. She needed help.

Her moms made the most sense, but would it be weird to walk straight past Brooklyn to do so? Like Maya didn't even consider her? Was that making things unnecessarily weird?

Full minutes must have passed as she stared at herself in the mirror, contemplating what to do. Long enough for her to get cold and slowly start to hate herself for being so awkward.

And then a soft knock came on the door. "Do you need any help?"

Maya breathed out in relief, glad she didn't have to go out and ask for it. "Yes," she admitted. "Can you get one of my moms?"

In the silence that followed her question, she waited for the confirmation that Brooklyn was on her way, her retreating footsteps as she left the room, but it stayed quiet. Maya perked her ears, trying to figure out what was wrong.

''I can do it," Brooklyn offered suddenly. "If you want." Her voice quieted until it sounded nearly timid. She was making it easier for Maya to back out.

On the other side of the door, Maya's heart jumped nervously in her ribcage, her eyes widening in shock as they shot to the door. A million thoughts flooded her mind, analyzing the situation. No shirt, Brooklyn's hands all over her back...

But once she got over the initial gay panic and really thought about it, it was nothing that hadn't happened before. Hell, Brooklyn had been staring at her bare back for the good part of an hour today. She'd seen her without a shirt enough times too, just always with a bra or bikini on. Maya would just have to hold her shirt to her chest and pray it didn't show anything.

''Okay,'' she decided, surprised at how much more confident that sounded compared to how she felt. She wished she could see Brooklyn's reaction to her answer, because she had a feeling she was surprised.

"Can I come in?"

"Yes."

The door slowly opened, like Brooklyn was still afraid of what she'd find even after consent. But then she stepped in, completely ready for bed, adorable slippers on her feet. Maya raised her eyebrows at the Christmas pajamas. In September.

"I know, I know." Brooklyn looked down at herself and tugged at the hem of her shirt, as if she knew she was being ridiculous wearing them. "But these are so cozy and warm."

Maya smiled widely at her childish whine. "They look cute. On you."

The girl raised her eyebrows. "On me? You're saying they're not cute in general? Have you seen these pinguins, Maya? Have you?" She shuffled closer, nearly hitting Maya in the face when she brought her sleeve close to her eyes. "Look at them, they're adorable! They have little mittens and a scarf."

Maya laughed, pushing the arm away from her. "Sure, they're cute."

"And these polar bears," Brooklyn continued like she'd never been interrupted, thrusting her arm right back where it was. "A red hat! They're even smiling!"

If she was trying to make Maya feel happy and light with joy, it was working. The smile on her face couldn't be any wider, her cheeks starting to hurt as she endured her girlfriend's odd behavior. She was a light in her life, someone to cheer her up and hold her hand if she needed. If today proved anything, it was that Maya could count on her.

''What?'' Brooklyn chuckled when she felt Maya staring, dropping her arm back to her side, the shenanigans over.

''Thank you for coming with me today," Maya said, her smile softening.

Brooklyn's eyes lit up at the gratitude. ''Of course. My butt has suffered a lot in all my hours of supporting you, but I gladly suffer for you," she teased, referring to Maya's soccer games she always watched.

Maya laughed. "I was doing most of the suffering today, though."

"Good point." She grinned.

Brooklyn looked so happy. Her whole face was lit up with glee, her blue eyes shimmering with delight. The effect it had on Maya was too strong to handle, like a cat being so adorable you wanted to squeeze it to death. Her human brain didn't know how to process that. It itched within her chest, that urge. But to her own surprise, that urge translated to a nearly desperate need to kiss her. Maya needed to kiss her. So she did.

Brooklyn didn't see it coming. A surprised sound got stuck in her throat when Maya took her face in her hands and planted her lips on hers, the both of them almost stumbling backwards. She was never that bold. Rarely. But it was perceived well.

After a slight delay, the blonde kissed her back, her hands eagerly finding Maya's waist to hold her close. This wasn't going to be a brief kiss, the tattoo would have to wait, because Maya felt the electricity deliciously shoot from her lips down to her toes until her whole body was on fire. It had quickly become one of her favorite feelings in the world. Never did she feel more alive than kissing her girlfriend, as if her lips were a defibrillator kickstarting her soul.

Brooklyn's pulse raced underneath her fingertips when the blonde pulled back to gulp in some air, her blue eyes rapidly flickering over Maya's face in bewildered surprise, wondering what had gotten into her to kiss her like this. She must have found something she liked, because with her grip on Maya's waist, she gently pushed her against the sink, smiling when the girl's breath hitched.

Whatever she did, her actions were always so gentle, leaving space and time to push her away if it wasn't what Maya liked. But sometimes Maya wished she'd be more confident, more... dominant, she supposed, so she'd feel more confident too, be bold. Overcoming her anxiety and doing something as cool as getting a tattoo gave her that boost of confidence today though.

Slowly, she ran her hands from Brooklyn's face to her hips, the girl too distracted by the kiss they shared to suspect anything. Ignoring the nervous butterflies, Maya subtly toyed with the hem of her Christmas pajama top, testing the waters, before shoving her hands under. As soon as her cold fingertips came into contact with the warm skin of Brooklyn's waist, the girl jumped in surprise, their lips breaking apart as she shrieked, her muscles tensing under Maya's palms.

"Fucking ice cubes." She laughed breathlessly.

Her lips were more red than normal, slightly swollen. She chewed on her bottom one as she watched Maya smile and chuckle proudly of what she had achieved, her cold hands slowly exploring Brooklyn's bare back.

Something shimmered in the back of her blue eyes, something real and pure, something Maya hadn't yet dared to name because she was too scared of what it meant. But it was there as Brooklyn stared at her in a trance, such a soft expression on her face that Maya felt her bones grow weak, completely trapped and victim to the feeling.

"You're so pretty," Brooklyn whispered, one of her hands raising to Maya's burning cheek. The tips of her fingers were nothing more but brushes of a feather as they glided from her cheekbone, under her dark circles, to the bridge of her nose. Her smile grew wider when Maya scrunched up her nose when it tickled.

She wanted to hide. It was too much, the way Brooklyn looked at her, the gentleness of her touch. But her hips were trapped against the sink and her neck was frozen still. She could only think of one thing to do, and this time, Brooklyn was prepared to meet her lips halfway.

Maya felt so warm as she kissed her. Her flushed cheeks, her pounding heart, the shortness of breath, the warm body against her own. And it only got worse when Brooklyn teasingly ran her tongue along her bottom lip, her stomach churning pleasantly. She welcomed the cool hands sliding under her own pajama top, the muscles in her stomach twitching when they moved over them.

Her brain was hyper aware of the movement, struggling to keep up with the kiss as Brooklyn's hands slid further and further up her torso, over the bumps of her ribs, until the tips of her fingers touched the underside of her breasts. They never went further than that, and they never would, not without consent.

Maya held her breath as Brooklyn's palms rested there, completely still. One movement and her fingers could brush something they hadn't touched before, not even over her shirt. Her pounding heart slammed into Brooklyn's palms. Her head felt light, not only from a lack of air. She was relieved when her girlfriend broke away from her lips, taking the opportunity to suck in a breath of air. The hands shifted when her lungs expanded, but they stayed within respectable zones.

Timidly, Brooklyn looked at her, just as eager for air. It was odd to think Maya had the same effect on her as the other way around, but she looked positively disheveled too, and a lot more serious than a minute ago. Her awake eyes stared deeply into Maya's to make sure she was listening closely.

''Can I take it off?'' She asked softly, and she didn't have to elaborate.

Despite seeing it coming, Maya's stomach still flipped around. She knew she could say no—Brooklyn's tender, loving face told her so—but she wanted to say yes. She wanted another step further. She wanted to be brave.

''Okay," she whispered, nodding once when Brooklyn hesitated because of her soft voice. The girl gave her a gentle smile, pressing a light kiss to her nose that had Maya giggling despite the nerves racing through her body.

Her heart pounded against her ribcage when Brooklyn unhurriedly retracted her hands until her fingers gripped the hem of her pajama top and slowly started to lift it off her body. She wasn't too conscious about her body, but she wasn't as casual about nudity as her friends were. She always faced the wall when she showered at school, and kept herself covered with a towel the rest of the time, shooting into her underwear as fast as she could.

But Maya also knew that Brooklyn would never judge her body. She hadn't shaved in three days, and some small spots of acne blended in with the millions of freckles covering her bare chest, yet it was none of those things she worried about. It was purely the intimacy of it all, crossing another line in their relationship.

They both laughed—Maya more nervously than Brooklyn—when her cloud of curly red hair fell out of the neckline of her shirt and covered her face completely. She couldn't see a thing, but Brooklyn was quick to brush the hair out of her eyes, the pajama top dropping to the tiled floor with a quiet thud. And then she stood before her girlfriend, half-naked.

Maya wouldn't have minded not seeing the reaction on Brooklyn's face when her eyes flickered down to her bare torso, a red tint to her cheeks as well. She had to fight the urge to cover her chest with her hands, willing her arms to stay at her sides. There was nothing weird about breasts, nothing to be nervous about. Before she could get too self-conscious, Brooklyn was already looking at her face again, her smile even wider than before.

''Beautiful," she muttered, pulling Maya's body flush against her own and planting a long kiss on her cheek. And a quicker one on the side of her nose. "But I didn't expect anything else."

Maya could sob at the softness of it all, her whole face bright red as she bathed in the affection shown to her. She felt relieved, proud of herself, light. All of those nerves, and for what?

On days like these, she wanted more. She wanted it all, to do all the steps, because they felt so small, and she never felt braver. But in general, she wasn't ready for more.

This was her first real relationship. The first person she'd kissed more than two times. Everything was new. Every feeling, every step, and although Brooklyn made her feel safe and comfortable, she just wasn't ready. And she totally respected that.

''Oh! Gosh!"

They both jumped, their lips breaking apart and their heads whipping towards the doorway where Katya stood in her long robe, looking quite disturbed.

"If you're gonna make out half naked, do it with the doors closed."

Maya pressed herself tighter against her girlfriend, hoping to cover her nudeness with her body. She'd never felt horror like this before, embarrassment burning her skin. If the floor could open up and swallow her whole, that would be great. "Mom! Get out!"

"Gladly." Beside the initial disturbance, Katya looked beyond unbothered by the actual sensuality of what she'd walked into, just eager to give her daughter her privacy back. She spun around, closing the bathroom door as she went. "Just wanted to see if you needed help, but it looks like you got it covered!"

"Knock!" Maya yelled.

"I did knock!" Katya defended herself, the volume of her voice betraying that she was just on the other side of the door. "You were clearly too busy to hear me! But I am sorry. We can just pretend I didn't see anything."

Maya softened a bit when she realized Katya truly did feel sorry. "Gladly. Now go away."

"Okay. Goodnight," Katya wished them sincerely. Her footsteps never made any sound on the floor, but the door audibly clicked, and Maya knew she did that on purpose.

She slumped and groaned in embarrassment once all was quiet, burying her face in Brooklyn's shoulder in an attempt to disappear and never have to face her moms again. By now, Katya would be telling Natasha what happened, and she did not look forward to dealing with all the teasing comments. "I'm so sorry about her."

Brooklyn chuckled quietly and rubbed Maya's back. "Don't be. I know your moms are unhinged and I love that about them." Maya relaxed, knowing she didn't really mind. "Besides, it's kinda more my fault. I must have left the bedroom door open when I left Mimosa in, and then this door when I came to help you. I'm sorry."

With a shake of her head, Maya pulled back enough to look at her, making sure her chest stayed covered. "It's not your fault. She came barging in here."

Brooklyn hummed, something dancing in her eyes that Maya suspected she wasn't going to like. Amusement. "Can I laugh now?"

Maya scowled threateningly. "You better not." Maybe next week, or a year from now, when the memory of getting caught making out half-naked by her mom didn't make her want to rip her skin off.

To her credit, Brooklyn tried her very best to smother her grin, pressing her lips together until they lay somewhat neutral. But she wasn't a spy and couldn't control the humor in her eyes. "Okay." She rolled up on her toes to kiss Maya on her forehead before she let her go to snatch her pajama top off the floor, sheepishly handing it over. "Come on, let's get it done."

With the garment pressed to her chest, Maya sat on the edge of her bathtub, her skin still crawling with leftover embarrassment that she tried shaking off while Brooklyn carefully ran the showerhead over her spine. Taking the tape and plastic off had been easy.

''It's so pretty," Brooklyn mumbled to nobody in particular as she very gently washed the tender skin.

Maya was too tired and distracted to focus on the way the touches on her back made her feel, but she did look at their reflection in the mirror. No, at Brooklyn's reflection in the mirror, the concentrated look on her face that made her adorable, the care she put into the whole procedure. She was so gentle, so loving, so caring. She was that person who would help with anything if a friend asked her to, even the weird or tedious stuff.

She helped Maya put on her shirt so the cream on her spine didn't get smudged, and then sent her to bed while she cleaned up in the bathroom, not accepting any protests. With slumped shoulders, Maya crawled under the covers, hating that she couldn't be the little spoon for a while. Brooklyn made for the best big spoon.

The girl laughed when she returned and saw Maya's sad pout, the one she desperately tried to hide as she hopelessly lay on her side. Maya shot her a glare, pulling the covers up to her ears as Mimosa settled in the spot behind her, dangerously balancing on the edge of the bed.

From her hiding spot, Maya watched as Brooklyn got under the covers, put lip balm on, flicked off the lights, and then laid down on her back. It was hard to make out her face in the dark, or what exactly she was doing, but Maya felt a thud above her head and knew she had opened up her arm. "Come here," she urged softly. She didn't have to say that a second time.

Shyly, Maya shifted closer, until she could rest her head on Brooklyn's shoulder and her nose brushed her collarbone. An arm wrapped around her to pull her closer, light fingertips tracing patterns on the arm she had draped over Brooklyn's stomach. It wasn't perfect, but it was close enough.

Maya closed her eyes in contentment, exhaustion hitting her like a brick now that she could finally relax. Despite having slept four hours in the car, it was minutes from overtaking her again. "Thank you," she whispered in the dark, not sure what for. Everything, she guessed.

"You're welcome." A smile rested on the lips that brushed over Maya's forehead. "Go to sleep. You're tired."

"Kay." Maya didn't protest. Sleep was all she wanted. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight, sweetheart."

She was too far gone to positively freak out over the new nickname.

~~~~~~~~

A/N: okay, hear me out. I know I said I would finish my Carol book first, but I couldn't. I missed this book so, so much, and I was hit with inspiration that I couldn't ignore. So I've decided I'll go back and forth. One update here, one update on Forbidden, etc. How have you all been? I missed you :) How was your Christmas?