Would God punish you for being too hopeful?

Seven does not believe that He will.

Seven only believes that it is his own fault.

Living with such a huge responsibility on his head... How could I take advantage of the vulnerable state that he was in?

As we tumbled back home, I decide that it was time for me to pack up and go back to Rika's apartment.

Because I was sure that if I stayed any longer, I wouldn't be able to hold myself.

I love Seven... And I want him to love me back with no other strings attached.

Not because I was helping him, but because he had real feelings for me.

I had to admit that I was getting more and more impatient as the days passed, even though I was trying my hardest not to let it show.

As I watch the way he is leaning against the door, sulking, not moving a bit since we came, I can only wonder how he would be feeling.

For once... I was starting to doubt that things would be okay.

It was half past six when I prepared something for him to eat. With my backpack in hand, I make my way to the door.

Seven had still not moved an inch.

"Please go and eat something..." I beg, tugging him up from where he was sitting.

Instead of replying, he grabs my hand, and I end up dropping the backpack I had in my other hand.

I wish I could say that I was the stronger one between us... That I was able to beat some sense into his head...

That things had worked out.

But reality never works out that way, I should have learned that by now.

His hands are so warm held within mine, it reaches all the way to my heart.

I had never seen him so vulnerable before, and his hand is so soothing that I might have given into temptation...

If Yoosung's voice did not interrupt us.

"Seven! I came to visit!" The joyful voice of Yoosung's calls out.

The two of us exchange glances, not knowing how to respond.

"Er well. You guys might be out... I'm leaving some of the leftover Kimchi my mum made. Bye, guys!"

We find Yoosung waving to the security camera before he walks off.

Seven's grip on my hand tightens, and he rubs a sleeve over his face.

"I guess we need to eat Kimchi now." He jokes, chuckling a bit.

I need to leave... I have to go, ASAP.

Otherwise...

It made me ashamed, how impatient and rushed I had become, because of the boy in front of me.

Getting the feeling that I might regret not properly expressing everything...

Even the fear of being shot down does not stop me from taking hold of a handful of his jacket.

"Seven... I'm in love with you."

How pathetic, I must have sounded, to have burst into tears as soon as the words slipped out.

And as I try to blink away the tears and wipe my face, Seven looks down at me, a puzzled expression on his face.

"God... How do I respond to that? Nothing has changed..." He says quietly.

I knew that.

I knew that well, but still...

As I watched Seven open the door and take the bag Yoosung had left, I realise that I had already told him that several times...

But he had never properly said it back to me.

I should have known, that this was what I chose to do, and now he was trying his best.

I was only going to get in his way of becoming a happy, cheerful person.

And I wanted him to be happy, so, so happy.

I just...

I might have hoped that he would be happy with me, too.

And that's what I get, for rushing things.

"So I guess... I'll be leaving, now." I pick up my backpack and wipe my face. I had shown enough of my crying face to him.

He didn't need to see me cry anymore and feel guilty.

It was my fault, after all.

And yet...

Seven closes the door shut, and punches in the lock.

"No... Please don't go yet."

I should have left.

"Please don't leave.... I can't do this on my own anymore."

I should have.

"Maybe, just maybe... You might be the one that saves me."

How can I say no to those words?

My legs are frozen when a teary-eyed Seven leans in and kisses me, on the lips.

Will I get punished for rushing things?

I could worry all I want to, but really; I could drown in his love... And die with no regrets.

---

a/n: i'm---

gdi it's a good thing i already drafted this book bc i'm not feeling too well and i'd feel bad if I didn't update today oshiete what is life even--
there's 4 more chapters until the log finishes yeyyyyy banzaii (≧∇≦)/
good news tho i'm also thinking of adding three more chapters in seven's pov or sth later on so double yeyyy for een (/^▽^)/