"Tears come from the heart and not the brain."

~ Leonardo di Vinci (via soft-spines)

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Alice's P.O.V

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"Alice, stop fussing over him."
"But, Peter, he could hurt himself. You're the one who said that Storybrooke's not a safe place anyway."
"Not when I'm around it isn't," Peter states. "The inhabitants of this town have heard about me. They wouldn't dare harm one of my own."
"Not even the people you've hurt?" I ask.

"They know better than to do such foolish things," he replies.
"Yes, but-" My eyes drift towards the boys, and I pause. "Hold that thought. Asa, Isaac, please be careful! Cassie may be extremely hyper but he isn't indestructible."
Peter hooks his fingers under my chin, turning my head away from the children. "Don't worry, love," he says, his gentle tone causing me to relax.

You look really weird in morden day clothes, I think to myself, I never imagined seeing you in jeans and a plain T-shirt.
"What are you smiling at?" Peter asks, poking my cheek.
"Nothing." I shake my head, still grinning. "I'm just not used to you wearing this type of clothes."
"Is that your way of saying that I look ravishing in this?" he asks.

"Um... No."
Peter pouts, sticking his bottom lip out. "And I thought you said you loved me."
"I do love you," I laugh, pecking him on the cheek. "It's just kinda strange for me to see you in the clothes of this century."
"But I still look sexy, right?" he asks.
I roll my eyes at him. "Yes, Peter. You still look sexy."

My eyes stray towards the beach again and smile widens at the sight of the three boys running around the beach. Cassie swings his wooden sword at the twins and Asa lets out a over dramatic cry, pretending that he's badly injured.
"Ah! I've been hit!" he yells, falling onto the sandy ground.
Cassie giggles, poking his older brother with the blunt point of his sword. "I win!"

"You did a great job raising our boys," Peter says, smiling at the sight.
I give him a sad smile. "I just wish you were there with me when that happened."
"I'm always with you-" He places his hand over my chest. "-in here."
"You're physically here, too, right?"
Peter's smile fades, but I pretend not to notice.

I close my book, sitting up on the beach chair. "I'll have to leave soon," I tell him, brushing the stay strands of hair away from my face. "I told Will and Lewis that I'd have the boys back before lunch. Do you think you'll be alright on your own?"
"Have you told them yet?"
"Told them what?" I ask, knowing full well what he is talking about.

"About the dreams you've been having," he says. "That they're back again."
I shake my head. "I don't know what you're talking about, Peter," I say, turning away from him.
"You can't keep doing this, Alice," he warns.
"Doing what?" I ask, not turning around to face him.

"This. Not telling them that you've seeing me," Peter says. "You have to tell someone. Anyone."
"I can't."
"And why not?"
"Because I can't. You know I can't," I repeat, turning around to look him in the eye. "They all think you're dead."
"Alice, you've got to remember, it's important. I am dead. Please, I implore you, for your own sake and for the boys', tell someone."

"This isn't real. I'm dead."
I look down at the book in my hands, pretending to be interested in the plain cover.
"Alice, love, look at me," Peter pleads.
"Hmm?"
"Alice."
"I'm not here," he says when I finally find the courage to look into his eyes. "You know that, don't you?"

I get to my feet, acting as if what he said did not faze me.
"I need to go," I tell him, ignoring his earlier words. "I'll see you tonight, okay?"
A trickle of tears stream down his face, causing my heart to ache.
"Alice, please-"
"Mummy!"
I blink, turning around to face the source of the voice.

"Yes, darling?" I ask, smiling at the toddler.
"Can we go back now, mummy?" Cassie asks. "I'm hungry."
"Sure, Cas. Go get your brothers," I say, gathering up my things.
"Okay, mummy," Cassie replies, running off to call his brothers.
"What were you saying just now, Peter? Peter?" I turn back to face him only to find that the beach chair is completely and totally empty.

Empty.

There's no sign that Peter visted me at all, or that he was even here in the first place.
Peter-
"What are you looking at, mummy?" a voice asks, jarring me from my train of thought.
I shake my head, looking away from the chair. "Sorry, darling. It's nothing."
"Are you sure, mum?" Asa asks.
"Yeah, you look pretty pale," Isaac adds.

"You sure?" Cassie asks, looking unconvinced.
I glance towards the chair once more and Peter's words repeating in my head.
Alice, please. Tell someone.
I shake my head again, pushing his words to the back of my mind. "I'm fine, Cas," I assure him with a smile. "Come on, let's go back to the rental home."

Isaac gives Asa a skeptical look, proceeding to have a wordless conversation with his twin. Asa shakes his head, mouthing something back to his brother. Isaac nods in response, and the both of them then act as if the whole exchange didn't happen. Asa then places on hand on Cassie's shoulder as Isaac places his hand on the other, both boys grinning.

"Come on, CC, race you back to the rental home!" Isaac shouts.
My lips curl into a small smile as I watch the twins race Cassie down the road to the rental home. I slow down my pace, seeing that Cassie's in safe hands. My hands shake as I see Peter's crying face in my mind again. His tearful eyes glisten like emeralds, but he doesn't move to wipe them away. A stay tear makes its way down his cheek and at that moment I can't tell who feels more broken.

I can hear his voice in the wind. "Alice," it seems to scream. "Please."
I glance back towards the beach, my gaze lingering on the horizon as another vision makes its way into my mind.
"What's on your mind, love?" Peter asks, noticing that I've stopped running my hand through his messy hair.
"I just realized something," I state.

"Hmm?"
"Remember the day I left?"
"How could I forget?" Peter opens his eyes, looking up at me. "What about it?"
"I was just thinking about how we never talked to each other about how the both of us felt day I left Neverland."
"Well, it isn't too late to start now," he says.

"I wanted to be with you. But I was just scared that you'd hurt me again, or worse, hurt someone I cared about." I sigh, running my hand through his soft, feather-like hair. "Do you blame me?"
I feel him shake his head. "No. I know why you did what you did and it's completely understandable. I broke your heart with all the lies I fed you and you didn't deserve to be pressurised to choose between your loved ones and I."

"That was unfair to you."
"Life's unfair, but we just have to bare with the pain and make the best of everything life throws at us," he says. "Have I ever told you how I felt when you left?"
"No." I shake my head. "That's never come up in a conversation."
"I felt like I was dying," he tells me. "Like someone had ripped out my heart and was slowly squeezing it so the pain would last longer."

"My lungs seemed like they were on fire and my heart felt like it stopped beating all together. Not even the pain of having my shadow being ripped out of my body could compare to what I felt when you left me standing under my thinking tree that day. When you said goodbye to me it was as if you told me that there would be no more oxygen for me to breathe tomorrow. It felt as if my sole purpose for living was snatched away from me."

Peter sighs, his breath forming a white cloud in the cold air. "How did you fall in love with me? How does one even fall in love with such a monster?"
"You're not a monster, Peter," I say firmly. "And to answer your question, I fell in love with the boy hiding behind a façade of confidence. With the boy who lived most of his life building up his walls in order to protect himself from his emotions."

I smile. "I fell in love with the boy who took in children who didn't have a home to go to. With the boy who made me feel like I was finally home -and sure, I had Lewis and Will, but I always felt like I was aimlessly wandering around with no knowledge of what I was looking for. I fell in love with the boy who made me feel whole again, and loved."

"But I'm like the ruins of a castle." He pauses, sighing as he looks up at the sky. "I'm far from perfect and I'm afraid that one day you'll finally realize that I'm not the one you deserve or that I'm not the person you want me to be. That my broken pieces will cut and bruise you so much that you'll leave me for good."

"I'll never do that to you again, Peter. I didn't fall in love with you. I walked into love with you, my eyes wide open and well aware of all your flaws and imperfections," I say. "I didn't believe in fate until I met you and I believe that we're fated to be together. That no force in heaven or on earth can separate us for good. What you did in the past stays in the past. The only thing I'm concerned about is our future together."

"You aren't as broken as you think you are, Peter. You are beautiful in my eyes, and I love all your perfect imperfections. You don't deserve a sentence or a paragraph. You deserve a million books written about how wonderful you are. You may think of yourself as a ruined castle, but, Peter, Rome was built on ruins, and it's quite magnificent. What makes you think you can't be either?"

I don't wait for him to answer. Instead I cup his face in my hands and kiss him. I kiss him fervently, and with as much passion as bookworm who's re-reading their favorite book and just can't put it down.
"I love you," I say in-between kisses. "I love you. I love you. And nothing's ever going to change that."

I wipe my tears off my face, turning away from the beach. "I'm sorry, Peter."
My words are carried away by the wind, to someplace far, far away from here where no one will ever hear. I continue walking down the road, willing myself not to break down and cry again.
"I'm never going to stop loving you, Peter," I say to the wind. "But I'm not going to tell anyone either."

The wind dies down, as if saddened by my words and I'm left walking down the empty street without its company.

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Hey, guys, guess who's back? I apologize for not publishing this chapter sooner, I had another writer's block. Honestly, it seems like the only time I ever get writer's block is when I feel like writing the most 😕 anyways, I don't really know if I want this to be a filter chapter or not, I just needed you all to know about those little -but important- details.

I'm kind of feeling really antsy right now bc I just finished watching Edge Of Seventeen and Passengers. I really love those two movies, espically Edge Of Seventeen I think it depicted teenage-hood perfectly and Hailee and J-Law were amazing as usual ❤ but enough about that, how are you guys? How's school? Are you all coping? I for one am doing great, I aced all of my class tests and my mental health (and health in general) have improved.

If 2017 hasn't been good to you so far, I just want to remind you all that I'm here for you and my DM is always open if you need someone to talk to ❤ Well, that's all for this A/N, bye guys :)

~ Alice xx

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Did anyone notice the little Sherlock reference/crossover I added in? 😏😉

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I'm quite happy with how this edit turned out tbh, even though it isn't as great as how I imagined it to be

Peter Pan aesthetic

Alice aesthetic

Palice aesthetic

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Vote, comment, rate, do whatever you want <3

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