No.

Oh, you were expecting a longer answer? Well, okay then:

First of all, let's address the ever-potent "being gay is a choice" argument. Straight people, I would like you to reflect on your sexuality for a moment. Tell me, did you choose to be straight? Did you wake up one morning and think, "Hmm, I think I'm going to be attracted to the opposite sex today"? Can you choose who you will find attractive, or does it just happen?

Chances are, your answers to the above questions were: "No, I've always been straight. I can't force myself to find someone attractive, just like I can't stop myself from finding members of the opposite sex attractive. It just kinda happens."

*Nods.* Uh-huh. I think we're done here.

On a more serious note, now that you've thought about your sexuality, hopefully you have realized that you didn't choose to be straight. You have either always known that you were straight, or when you started experiencing sexual attraction, you only had attractions to the opposite sex.

The truth is that every other sexuality operates the same way. Gay, lesbian, bisexual, and pansexual individuals do not choose to have same-sex attractions. They can't force themselves to be attracted to the opposite sex if that isn't a part of their sexuality, just like they can't stop themselves from being attracted to members of the same sex.

Now, this isn't an attempt on my part to explain why people have same-sex attractions, just that it isn't a choice they can make. Most scientists think that both nature and nurture play complex roles in an individual's sexuality and attractions, so genetic, hormonal, developmental, social, and cultural influences affect the outcome. This goes for all sexualities, including heterosexuality! Let me repeat: this goes for ALL sexualities, including heterosexuality! Sexual orientation is affected by a complex mixture of genetics, hormones, development, and social and cultural influences, but it is not a choice.

(I am also not arguing that gay people can't choose their actions. Just like someone who is straight can choose a myriad of paths, from sleeping around to staying celibate, from marriage to premarital sex to no marriage at all, people who are gay, bi, or pan can choose any of these paths. I am merely arguing that they can't choose who they are sexually attracted to, nor can they choose their romantic or emotional attachments.)

This means that sexuality is not as simple as "I was born this way," since both nature and nurture have a say in the outcome. However, the opposite of "born this way" is not "choice." The factors that go into sexual orientation make it so that heterosexuality and homosexuality can't be "taught" and people can't be "recruited" to change their sexuality. Sexuality is so much more complicated than black and white, so it can't be boiled down to one particular factor, choice, or cause.

Furthermore, the "being gay is a choice" argument becomes even muddier when we realize that we need to define what we mean by "choice." Sometimes people argue that being gay is caused by a certain gene in our DNA, so it can't be a choice. But even if scientists find that there isn't a gay gene, it doesn't mean that sexuality is a choice. As a very good research paper points out, "to the extent that a trait is not genetic, it is caused by the environment, not by free will. If a trait is not present from birth, then it is caused by events occurring after birth, not by free will" (Bailey). So if our sexuality as human beings isn't caused by a certain gene, our sexualities are still affected by our environment and are NOT a choice.

The other definition of "choice" is one we use on a daily basis to mean "the sense of making a decision" about something. But it doesn't make sense to say that sexuality is a choice. We can choose our actions, but we cannot choose our feelings. Let me repeat: we can choose our actions, but we cannot choose our feelings. If somebody punches me in the throat, try as I might, I'm still going to feel pain. If I eat a funny scallop, I can't will away my stomachache. Whether I feel happy about winning first place at a music competition or I'm grieving over the loss of a loved one, I can't change how I feel in those situations.

This includes our sexual desires. For example, I will never be able to find Donald Trump desirable; he's a cocky, racist, ignorant douchebag. But young Leonardo Dicaprio, Nathan Chen, or Amandla Stenberg? I find all of them very attractive, and once again, that is not something I can will away. I can't force myself to be attracted to someone or get rid of my attraction to someone else. My feelings are my feelings. Human beings cannot choose their feelings, nor can they choose who they desire sexually; our desires may be a combination of nature and nurture, but they are not a choice.

Which brings me to my next point: homosexuality is not a mental illness or disorder. Once the "being gay is a choice" argument is debunked, anti-gay people usually switch tactics and argue that homosexuality must be an illness or a disorder, instead.

"Didn't the APA used to classify homosexuality as a disorder?" anti-gay people say. Yes, but it was taken off the list for good reason. Anti-gay people argue that the reason that it was taken off the list is because of pressure from the gay community, but this is only part of the truth. It was the gay community along with the weight of scientific studies that showed that being gay is not an illness that helped take homosexuality off of the list. Those who claim that homosexuality is a mental illness are blatantly ignoring the fact that there is ample scientific evidence that shows that homosexuality is not a disorder and is a normal variation of human sexuality. The APA didn't take homosexuality off of its list due to pressure; the APA took it off because it could no longer justify discriminating against an entire group of people who have nothing wrong with them.

Anti-gay people then jump to unfairly comparing homosexuality to sexual disorders, or to making arguments that homosexuality is harmful, which I will get to in the next two chapters.