(i actually despise my writing in these first few chapters im sorry)

rose pov

' hey dorothea
do you ever stop and think about me?
when we were younger
down in the park '

I stared at the night sky above me, I always loved the view from here. A chill ran down my spine as I thought of the past two weeks events.

Orion Black is gone.

We buried my beloved grandfather today, I was meant to speak, tell the wizarding world what a great man he was and how heartbroken I am that he's gone.

But as the time came for him to be put in the ground and for me to stand on that hideous podium, I felt speechless. My throat tightened as I looked upon the sea of faces and saw every single member of the scared twenty eight looking back at me, expecting a meaningful speech for the man who lived so long.

I made eyed contact with the three people who could've made it easier for me. Theodore Nott, Whitman Rosier, and Narcissa Malfoy. Hoping...no—praying, that somehow looking at them would make me be able to speak and make up grand things to say about the man I spent almost sixteen years of my life being raised by.

But of course, nothing came still.

So with one last nod to Theo—knowing he understood he needed to handle this, I simply walked off and I did not turn back around.

That's how I landed myself here, at dusk, on the astronomy tower of Hogwarts.

Alone.

Trying to think of how I will explain to the world why the powerful man who raised me did not get kind words on the day he was being put back into the soil of the earth. The truth is not something people yearn for, they will proclaim to want it, say it is wrong to hide the truth.

I think different.

I think that if they knew how destroyed the granddaughter of Orion Black is to know she will never look him in the face again is, they would say it's understandable. But not if they became aware of how terrified I am to be left with only his wife, Walburga Black. That's when they would turn away from me. Say it is preposterous to think anyone could feel that away.

I would say they are wrong.

I wish I could say good things about the woman who wiped my butt as a baby and fed me, but I couldn't. Not after the years of mental abuse, the years of physical torture. The only good memories I have of that woman is her brushing my hair for me, teaching me the stars. And the only thing I am grateful she gave me is a house-elf named Kreacher.

Orion though, oh Orion Black was one of the best men I knew. Although he witnessed the abuse, he never stood by or supported it. He was quiet man with high intellect and just wished to exist in this world. And he was good to me, really good to me.

I'm brought back to my surroundings as I feel a drop of rain hit my skin. I look up into the sky hoping it will pour down rain that very second. Wishing the sky will let me experience one of the few things I love in this world.

Rain.

I decide to stop my head from the insane amount of thoughts coming in and out at once and finally take a seat against the ledge, letting my legs dangle off. I pull out my pack of cigarettes and begin to light one, as soon as I take my first puff I hear the door slam at the bottom of the stairs. I don't bother to turn around, whoever it is doesn't make any difference to me. I vow myself to sit here until the moon is full above me and I can recall the constellations.

I hear footsteps, and they are running quickly up the winding stairs of the tower, like they are in a rush to be at the top. I'm prepared to be forced into conversation with whoever decided to intrude on my peaceful moment thinking they would also be alone here. But What I am not prepared for is the owner of the voice I hear.

"Rosie, what the bloody hell happened?" The voice of Draco Malfoy asks and it startles me so much that when I whip around it could result permanent neck damage.

I look him up and down in his black suit and turtleneck, taking in the bags under his eyes that match mine, he's standing a few feet behind me giving me an expression I can't put my finger on. After a good look at him I quickly turn around taking another drag of my cigarette, looking back into the almost fully set sun.

I hear footsteps, a good indicator that he will be forcing me into a conversation over the one thing I came up here to contemplate in silence.

As he sits himself next to me, letting his legs dangle off the edge as well, I reach over and grab a extra cig before handing it to him.

He looks at me for a moment with that same expression of something I can't quite make out, then he takes the cigarette from me and puts it between his teeth.

Draco nods at me indicating he wants to light it the way we did when we first started smoking, the days we would steal cigarettes from Narcissa. I huff in annoyance, but still lean towards him with my cigarette hanging in mouth, taking a long drag to let him light the end of his with the end of mine.

After his is lit, we both turn back to the view in front of us. I hear him taking a long drag beside of me and I wait for him to ask the question again as I know he wants to.

Then he speaks, but it's not what I expected.

"I thought you would want to know Theo handled it perfectly for you, said you rehearsed with him your 'speech' and he would be making it in your place" Draco huffs out before flicking the end of his cigarette to get rid of the ash before taking another drag and looking at me expectantly.

"I never had a speech" I say simply.

Glancing over at him we lock eyes, delivering a message few would understand. But I knew he understood.

Draco nods at me and gestures me over, then I sigh and move over resting my head on his shoulder.

I look up at him and mumble, "If you tell anyone about this moment I will murder your future bloodline and the next"

Looking down at me he still is giving me that stupid expression that is now making me mad it's so confusing.

I thought I knew every Draco Malfoy face.

He clears his throat and looks away mumbling back, "I'd have your head for telling someone you sodding blood-traitor"

I crack the faintest smile from thankfulness for our banter that brings some normalcy to my day. Shortly after I focus my gaze back on the slowly darkening sky, and grab us both another cigarette while keeping my head on his shoulder. Handing him one before I light my own with the silver lighter marked by Narcissa's initials.

Memorabilia from our childhood together.

Bringing my head up to light his the same way once again, I let my eyes trail over his face this time while doing it.

As I rest my head back on his shoulder I decide to speak about the day. Maybe it's because of the comfort the night sky brings me.

"My life is going to hell now that he's gone" I say with honesty radiating from me, coming from a place I like to keep locked up.

Draco looks down at me and whispers as if to make it seem like a secret, "Hate to tell you Rosie—but it already was hell"

I see the ghost of a smile coming onto his lips, making one come onto my own face. I shake my head and grab his arm to wrap it around my shoulders while leaning into his chest now instead of his shoulder, and he huffs in fake annoyance at the action.

We both take long drags on our cigarettes before breaking the silence again.

"Walburga's a shit human, she done so many things to me I don't think I will ever recover from but now with grandfather gone who knows if I'll make it to eighteen" I said, my voice returning to it's normal bluntness with a edge, a few seconds pass before I sigh and take yet another puff.

"Your stronger than her, you have a resilience she'll never have" he said, pausing to take a drag. "She wants to make you as miserable as her bloody self"

I look up at him as he flicks his ash off the side of the tower, deciding I can no longer take the niceness he is radiating. "Did the Draco Lucius Malfoy just call Rose Black 'strong'?"

He scoffed while refusing to look down at me, grasping my chin and refocusing my attention to the view of the night sky and gloom school grounds. "Don't get used to it Rosie"

My lips twitch and I lean even more into him while enjoying the warmth it brought me, the familiarity of him. Even if he is supposed to be the one human I despise, we grew up together. We saw each others families up close, we understood things others could never be capable of.

It didn't help that I had been in hopelessly in love with him since I was a child.

I would never admit that though, for obvious reasons.

We sit in a comfortable silence leaning into one another even after we finish off our cigarettes. For a while we stay looking at the stars slowly filling the now completely night sky.

When I look up to see the Sirius star and shake my head, it startles him from what has been a long silence.

He looks down at me expecting a explanation, I only meet his gaze and turn to point to the star. Draco starts to chuckle at me and I pull away from our embrace to look at him with a face of betrayal.

"What is so funny to you sir?" I say with a bit of fake annoyance, Draco holding his hands up as if claiming innocence.

"It's just the fact we buried your grandfather today, your absentee father is on the loose, your favorite thing about life is the stars and you couldn't even peacefully do that because that imbecile who helped create you has his star staring in your bug eyes" said Draco.

I swat his chest a few times and he begins laughing harder at me before pulling me into him again. He forces me to rest against him like I was, and I give in knowing when we leave this tower tonight I won't be able to wallow like I am now.

I'm almost relaxed again when he starts shaking his head with a slight laugh, I look up at him with a face that says 'what now?' and he looks down at me then back at the sky.

"You also will always have to face the fact that one of your favorite stars is named after the boy you hate" he says with a cheeky smile playing on his lips, one most people never get a glimpse of.

It makes my heart do flips.

"I will always hate you for turning my favorite star into the one that belongs to a prat like yourself" I shake my head in fake annoyance. Shortly after I mumble under my breath, "Cheeky little bastard"

"I heard that you nutter" The edge to his voice returns while reaching over me for my cigarette pack, I swat his hands and sit up earning another "nutter" mumbled under his breathe.

I slide out two more cigarettes and begin our same process, lighting mine and turning to him.

But he is already looking at me, barely illuminated by the glow of the moon, wearing that same frustrating facial expression with his daming blue eyes.

I lean into him while taking a long drag and light the tip of his with mine again. We maintain eye contact that has my gaze softening.

When we do break away I look at him with the cig hanging in my mouth still and tell him what I have been wanting to since he first looked at me like that.

"Stop giving me that face you tosser!"

He looks up at the sky using his non-smoking hand to lean on before speaking, "What are you bumbling about now?"

I look at him with a expression of shock leaning towards him and point my cigarette at his face,  "What do you mean?! You have been giving me this facial expression and I can't understand what it is! It is gonna drive me insane!"

Still refusing to look at me he speaks, "Yeah and why is it gonna drive you insane might I ask?"

"Look at me you pillock! I know every dumb facial expression that Draco Malfoy is capable of making and this new one is undetectable!" I say, raising my voice even more.

He whips his head towards me and smirks in all too familiar way, "Do you keep track of all my facial expressions Rosie?"

'Oh he's done it now' is all I can think before I am speaking again. "I will have you know I would not have to keep track if you weren't constantly trying to bicker all hours of the day with me!"

He still hasn't wiped that stupid smirk off his face when he takes another drag, "Or you just happened to like my face so much you can't keep it out of your head!" he finished off the sentence with a slow raise to his voice, the mirth in his tone only increasing as he points his cigarette at me.

"Stop pointing your cigarette at me like a crazy person before I considering throwing you off this tower!" My annoyance comes out in my tone, not even realizing how many times I have pointed my cigarette at him.

He flicks his ash off the ledge before raising his eyebrows at me as if to communicate mentally. "Now now Rosie, you wouldn't dare" he says while shaking his head, laughing slightly to himself.

"And why would I not 'dare' do such a thing?" I say curiosity replacing the annoyance that was once laced in it.

He leans closer to me smirking even more devilishly if possible, "Because who else would be able to rile up that tough little exterior you put up?" He leans away and looks back up at the sky while taking a drag before continuing, "You, Rose Black, would remain boringly unfazed every single day"

I look at him with a bewildered look on my face, unable to find the words to keep our battle of wits going, he noticed and starts shaking his head again with a melodic laughter.

I lean into the cobblestone post behind me an let one leg drape off the edge so I am facing him directly. I completely considering throwing myself off this tower at the epiphany consisting of me needing Draco Malfoy to rile me up.

Unable to accept this possibility I speak up, "I am sure eventually someone would be so inherently annoying as you they would get under my skin"
I huff before speaking again realizing no one will ever be as insufferable as the man before me, "You are cruel for that one Mister Malfoy, cruel I tell you!"

He gives me a knowing look before flicking his cig off the tower and reaching to grab mine out of my hand. I am so bewildered with a mix of stupid admiration of his face that I didn't realize it's been burning my finger.

After he tosses mine off he looks at me and grabs my cheek which makes me freeze, "Is it so cruel of me to state the obvious?"

I clear my throat and begin to swat at his hand until it's removed, just as I'm about to retort I hear shuffling. We exchanged a look of understanding that something is off before he stands and offers a helping hand that I refuse. We look around the top floor for anyone hiding in the dark shadows.

I barely move two feet from my spot before Draco is in front of me.

I roll my eyes at him and try to push him out of the way to no avail as he turns around and places a finger on his lips before moving to the far corner of the tower where the darkest part rests. I quickly get annoyed with his slow process, however I am in complete shock when he returns with a massive black dog by his side.

"What in the name of Merlin is that dog doing here?!" I yell at him, causing Draco to roll his eyes at me. I decide to shut his attitude down immediately, "Keep rolling your eyes blondie and they will get stuck"

He walks closer towards me with the dog still in tow beside him as he speaks loud with annoyance, "Says the queen of rolling her eyes every five to ten seconds"

I roll my eyes without thinking and go to bend down to the dog but stop mid way realizing I have proved his point right. I look up at him, seeing his twisted smirk that pointedly says 'I win' and start to curse the boy under my breathe while I continue my crouch down to the dog.

When on eye level with this odd dog I am on the verge of commenting about how sickly it looks before I hear Draco's voice, "Speak up Rosie, only half-bloods mutter under their breathe"

I immediately stand up from being face to face with the dog, retorting with a glare. "You insolent child you annoy me to no end!"

Immediately the dog barks and we both look down at the dog before speaking in unison.

"Shut up!" We say in unison.

We huff and turn back to each other starting a staring contest until I decide to break the silence by calling Draco every name under the sun besides his given name.

It turns into a full blown match of raised voices and harsh words until I start to say a sentence that we start filling in the blanks for one another.

"Is-" I say loudly.

"That-" Draco yells back just as loud.

"All-" I yell, attempt to cover his voice up.

"You-" Draco shouts even more resounding than myself.

"Got?!" I shout in ending. I am so distracted by his insufferable self I completely forget the days events as we both stare at each other, inches apart, chests heaving from anger and yelling.

A situation we find ourselves in too often.

"I hate, I mean genuinely, hate when you do that" I speak with such exasperation before continuing, "Stop finishing my sentences in the middle of a argument you tosser!"

I poke his chest repeatedly to piss him off, and I can see from the way he is staring at me with such anger that this is not gonna stop within the next hour when suddenly the dog starts barking again.

"What?!" We yell in unison again, looking at the dog expectantly.

The dog gives us a stare of being absolutely horrified, well—as much as a dog can give a look.

I sigh while shaking my head before bending down to the dog, "Draco, why does he look so skinny?"

Draco bends down to be level with dog, giving him a look of distaste before turning to me, "Why do you expect me to know? He smells absolutely horrid!"

As soon as he says it the dog knocks him back, making him go from squatting to sitting on his arse. Then the dog takes a stance over my body while standing like a protector, snarling at draco.

I can't help but have a fit of laughter at the animal, "Oh my Merlin he heard you Draco!" I go into a sitting position and the dog rests his head in my lap, making me carefully and awkwardly pat it's head.

Draco is giving me a look mixed with horror and panic before he opens his mouth, "How the bloody hell does a mutt understand English? And why would it like you out of all people?" He gets up, making his way towards me. "Let's get the nasty thing off you before you smell like it!"

He goes to remove the dogs head from my lap only to be snapped at as he squats down to our level, making me fall forward with laughter.

"I don't mind him Draco, we both know you have a soft spot for animals too" I say with mirth dancing in my voice.

The dog looks up at me and nudges his head on my hand as Draco speaks again, reluctantly sitting beside me and the dog. He grumbles, looking disgusted at me letting the dog on my lap. "Don't speak about animals to me, I only like your snake"

"Nyx loving you is still the biggest mystery in the wizarding world" I say before continuing on, "Harry says it's because your a slimy snake like her—to which she bit Harry's hand" I throw my head back with laughter recalling it happening, "She didn't like that comment very much"

Draco turns towards me, a smile fighting off his lips as he mutters. "Bloody Potter, that's who's completely insufferable."

I groan loudly startling the dog who looked like he was listening intently to what we were saying, "Please don't, I can't bear to listen to it. You both drive me insane with your cross words for one another"

Dracos smile slips as he sighs, refusing to look at me as the words tumble out. "You know I never planned to befriend him or give him that speech that made you so mad our first year, twat of father wanted me to...told me what to say and everything"

I realize I have been staring at him so I look down at the dog in my lap, "You know as much as I hate you Draco, I will hurt Lucius one day. I would go to Azkaban if it meant you and Cissa could be free of that bastard"

As I said this the dog looked up at me, a look of concern written on his face.

Draco doesn't respond to my comment just slowly reaches over and starts petting the dog who looks at him questioningly, my lips twitching  sadly at the action. "I never knew why he wanted me to befriend the 'Chosen One', I figured at the time it was because Potter was famous and he wanted us to be in good grace" He sighs, still keeping his focus on the dog in my lap before starting again. "I realize now he probably wanted me to have Potter close incase Voldemort came back"

I refuse to look up as I feel a single tear roll down my cheek, I mutter my words about Lucius instead of holding a edge to my voice. "Disgusting isn't it, to know he would use you for his own benefit?"

"You have no idea Rosie" He responds quietly, his petting of the dog ceasing before standing and holding out his hand.

I sigh for what felt like the millionth time, taking his hand and stand up, the dog following suit.

I just look at Draco in this moment, his striking platinum blonde hair and sharp facial structure, mixed with the fierce blue eyes that command attention. I wonder if he knew how much of a rarity he looked like—

Suddenly I'm brought back to earth as the dog moves between us and tries to nudge the hands we both so clearly didn't realize were still holding one another.

We jump apart while trying to recover from the gravitational pull we held for each other, I shake it off and blame it on the exhausting day I endured. Not to mention the exhaustion that Draco endured from spending Merlin knows how long up in this tower with me.

We both stand in silence before deciding to break it at the same time, the dog just standing between us with what seemed to be amusement.

"Well-"

"So-"

I speak up again, looking down at my inky hair as I realize we have been up here for four hours. "How we managed four hours in each other presence is beyond me, I give credit to my avoidance towards Walburga for the impeccable fet we made today"

He shakes his head at me, and gives me that same face. "Best not to tell anyone, they might think we both hit our heads"

I crack a smile at this before deciding it's time for me to get home, "I better go before grandmother loses it, Theo and Whitman are at Grimmauld Place....Full moons coming up, you know how hard it is for Whit"

I fumble with my sleeves with a sinking pit in my stomach thinking about his transformation. Draco sighs and nods at me, "I will stop by in the next few days with his potion, You don't need keep going to Knockturn alley alone"

I roll my eyes at him, "I didn't mind having to make it last month, I will be in knockturn alley regardless. Nothing will ever keep me away from Borgin and Burkes, not even if Voldermort comes back and is flaunting the streets"

Draco only rolls his eyes right back, "I should know by now. Your obsession with Borgin and his store is a oddity"

Realization hits me like a truck and panic starts to film my tightening chest, "Draco, what's going to happen now?"

Draco cuts me me off by shoving my shoulder, "I don't know but I'll be here with you"

He clears his throat as he realizes the words he spewed, "In a uh—enemy type of way"

I take a deep breathe then nod at him with a twitch to my lips, "Let's floo home, Minnie said we could use her office"

———————————————————————-

A/N: so the rewrite begin!! im honestly so excited for this and although I won't be picking the story back up from where we were until I catch up with the rewrite...I think you'll all love this version much more and I'm posting AT LEAST one chapter a day! Do you see how I'll be posting it now? I didn't want to make a seperate book and confuse people and I also didn't want to take down everything already posted so you can still reread all that if you wish until we get caught up!

—if there's anything you wish to see tell me <3

—happy late x-mas or Christmas depending on what you celebrate!

—also for those who asked, the Tom storyline will still exist ofc!! i know some of you hate him but like...he's so baby girl😎

—whose ready for emotionally woke Rosie? ME!

—rose is completely aware that she's in love with Draco and THEO from the beginning in this rewrite....just thought I should point that out :p

—Whitman's story line is going to be diff, there will be no romance with Hermione

—how do we feel mattheo should go?

me after deciding to rewrite my book because I simply can:

me after rereading and realizing there is much I want to change:

all of you realizing you have to go through all the pain again before getting back to where we were:

xoxo love u guys