CHAPTER ONE

    His room was dimly lit. I could see a dull light flickering into his room from the open bathroom doorway, a loud drip came every few minutes. The blanket only covered me from my chest to my thighs; he was hogging most of the blanket so my legs weren't covered. It was cold, but I was fine, because I was leaving. His snoring increased, and my eyes began to feel heavy. A part of me wanted to close my eyes and fall asleep with him.

    I suppressed a sigh as I slid the blanket off and rose up. I looked over at his sleeping form, his mouth was slightly ajar, his hair poking out in odd angles with his hand resting atop his abdomen. He wasn't wearing any clothes either, I could tell by the prominent bulge underneath the sheets. I pursed my lips and turned away. He was deep in his slumber, nonetheless I felt embarrassed for looking at his nakedness poorly covered by a quilt.

    Quietly, I slipped off of the bed and crawled to my clothes. They were bunched in a pile against the wall. The darkness of the room made it hard for me to put my clothes on correctly, I mean, I  almost put my underwear on backwards. Once I was all dressed with my phone, keys, and wallet I tiptoed to his room door; it was cracked open so I pushed it open and then I silently made my way to his front door. I felt bad about leaving his front door unlocked, but I didn't look back. I walked home that night at 3 o'clock in the morning. It was a long and tiring walk. As soon as I got home, I collapsed atop my fluffy blanket and fell into a deep slumber.

    I awoke with a start. Coughing the flem out of my throat, as I pushed the stray bangs from my eyes. I was still bone achingly tired, my eyes wanting nothing more than to stay shut, but I couldn't sleep any longer. My brain wanted to overthink, but my body wanted to sleep. Guess which one won the battle? My brain did.

    I sighed heavily, rubbing the rest of my sleep from my eyes as I stood up. I reach up, stretching my spin. A few satisfying cracks sounded throughout my quiet room, I dropped my arms and began trudging forward, dragging my bare feet against my plush carpet. I reached the door to my bathroom and groaned as I slammed the door open and headed for the shower. The tile floor was so cold that I began to shiver.

    As I showered, last night's memories came rushing back to me. I gulped, trying to forget every last second of last night. If I forget, it'll be like it never happened. That's what I told myself as I dried myself off with my beach towel and stared at my naked reflection in the bathroom mirror. I rubbed my arms, wishing they were more defined. I eyed my stomach, wishing it was covered in muscle instead of fat. My dark brown frizzy hair that gradually got lighter at the edges, and my light blue eyes that almost looked grey. My fair skin that darkened to olive if I spent enough time in the sun. I turned away and walked to my closet. I don't have time to knit pick because today is saturday, a weekend and also my day off from work. I had forgotten, amid the tiresome night of disorderly events. My brother. Had texted me, for the first time in years, last week and we made a plan to meet up today, right before he will get shipped off to serve his country. It's been years since I'd last seen him. Suddenly, I had a new spring in my step at the thought of seeing him, after all these years.

    Coffee; a hot drink made from the roasted and ground seeds of a tropical shrub. Also known as-

    "A hot cup of Joe!" My brother announces as he slides into the seat across from me. He picks up his cup of coffee and hurriedly gulps some down, "I'm going to miss this," he purrs, rubbing his thumbs on the hot glass cup.

    I raised my eyebrow at him, "I'm sorry, Sam. I didn't notice when you came in. I was-"

    "Distracted." He finishes for me, begrudgingly. I know he was hoping for a warmer welcome than my distracted mind. "Don't worry about it Dew Drop." He says, using my childhood nickname to lighten the mood. "Let's just enjoy this moment, yeah?" He smiles, seemingly content as he gulps down more coffee. I nod my head with a smile, "yeah," I whisper. My mind beginning to drift elsewhere.

    "How's work?" He cooes, drops of coffee slid down his chin and dissipate into his beard. Huffing, I sighed, "boring. The only exciting thing I experienced this week was that club I went to." Sam's eyes widened, "You went clubbing with friends?" He questioned, the words sounding foreign on his lips. Sam wiped his chin and set his empty coffee cup on it's coaster. "God, no." I pursed my lips and tried not to imagine myself in a tight black dress with high heels and makeup caked on my face. The thought put a sour taste in my mouth. "I just went out for a few drinks. By myself!" I rushed to clarify. "It was some bar slash club called Margarita or something," I mumbled, rolling my eyes. "I hated it."

"Oh," Sam replied.

    I expected him to say more, I wanted him to say more. My irritation began to boil up the longer he stayed silent. I don't know why I wanted him to be more interested in my life. This should not be about him wanting to know more about me, this should be about me wanting to know more about him before he gets shipped across seas for a decade. I'm not sure how long his contract will last, because I don't know anything about the military, but I know he will be gone for a very long time. A big part of me still craved attention. I hate that part of me. I squeezed my eyes shut as a sharp pain shot through my head. Groaning, I pushed my coffee cup further away from me.

    "Hey, are you okay, Dew Drop?" Sam asked quietly. I was grateful for his sublty, even if no one was paying attention to us.

    I nodded, "yes, I think I just have a migraine." My body tensed. I was awkwardly leaned over the table with my elbows supporting my weight. I tried to ride out the migraine, hoping it would go away quick and we wouldn't have to make a scene. A public place was the perfect place for a migraine, I thought in heavy sarcasm. "I'll be okay, Sam." I gritted my teeth. Even talking caused the pain in my head to worsen. I felt a warm hand cover my clenched fist on the table. 

    "Do you want me to run to the corner store and get you some Tylenol?" He asked in a rush as he rubbed soothing circles on my hand with his thumb. I shook my head, "no. I have ibuprofen in my bag. Will you get it for me?" I tried opening my eyes, my vision was blurry and unstable. The corners of my eyes darkened with every blink of my eyes. My legs began to feel jittery, they wanted to run home and lay in bed where my body could safely sleep this migraine off. 

    Suddenly, Sam was pushing a fat pill between my lips. I opened my mouth, accepting the pill, and immediately swallowed it without any drink to wash it down. I felt the pills slow decent to my stomach. Sam placed my still full coffee cup into my hands, it wasn't ideal, but I gulped the coffee down. The pill, no longer caught in my throat, settled into my stomach. It's weight was unnerving as I waited for my migraine to dissipate. I wiped the drops of coffee from the corners of my mouth as I set the cup down on it's coaster. In my haste, I had drank the entire cup.

"Thank you," I sighed in delight, my migraine dissolving into a headache and then into nothing.

"No problem, Sis." He grinned.

"Yuck!" I exclaimed, "don't call me that!"

Sam laughed, knowingly. "I'm just teasing you, Drew. I know you don't like that nickname."

"Good. At least you haven't forgotten that." I smiled, remembering how he used to tease me when we were younger. I developed a hatred for that nick-named when I was very young. "What do you mean? I haven't forgotten anything, Drew!" He stated, his eyes painting a perfect picture of how hurt he felt. I knew he was playing with me by the way his mouth sagged in an over dramatic frown. "We haven't seen each other in years." I deadpanned. My statement seemed a little too serious for the topic, but I wanted to address the elephant in the room. "I know, don't remind me." He sighed, releasing all the air from his lungs, letting his shoulders sag forward, and tilting his head downwards as he scratched his cheek. "I'm joining the military now." He finalized. I stared at the way his cheek jiggled everytime he flicked it with his nail. "Well, if you want we don't ever have to talk about the past?" His eyes darted up to meet mine. He straightened his posture and took a deep breath before speaking. "No. We can talk about our past, Dew Drop. I just don't want to talk about that part of my life," he trailed.

"Yet?" I tried.

He pained eyes bore into mine, telling me more than I could understand. "Yeah. Not yet." I nodded my head and cleared my throat, "so anyways," I rushed. "What made you contact me after all this time?" He paused in thought. "I thought it'd be nice to catch up with you before I'm shipped off. We won't see each other for a while." My eyes softened. He continued, "I regret a lot of things-"

"No. No, no, no don't do that." I interjected. I saw his lips part and I hurriedly spoke again. "Don't do that, Sammy."

"Do what?" He asked, his eyebrows wrinkled in confusion and mild anger.

"Don't get all sappy with me."

"I'm trying to be serious. We haven't talked since we were teenagers." He countered.

"Yeah? And who's fault is that?" My voice portrayed every inch of my anger. My jaw clenched to hold back all the hurtful things I wanted to unload on him. I had to continuously remind myself that we were sitting in a coffee shop. Sam groaned, his frustration leaking out. I could tell he was trying to keep his anger under control. He didn't want to make a scene in this coffee shop either. "For the last time, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left. Are you going to let this go, or keep rubbing it in my face that I'm a horrible brother?" His pained expression begged me to drop the subject. I wanted to, but how could I just forget?

"For the last 7 years, yeah I tried to let it go." I admitted, my voice calm once again. "And I could almost pretend that it never happened," I paused as I saw the hurt look on his face, then I continued, "but then, you texted me. You texted me that you wanted to meet up, and my whole fake world came crashing down." I heaved. "How did you even get my number?" I asked the question that has been burning the back of my mind for days.

"I asked mom." Was his only response. 

I could feel my heart pound harder in my chest. My eyes stinging with fresh tears, "well, isn't this a surprise." I wiped my eyes, lowering my head so I wouldn't grab attention to myself.

"Drew. We love you." Sam stated, a matter of factly.

"Yeah, but that still doesn't change what happened, or how it makes me feel." I wiped my eyes one last time, taking in a shaky breath, and stood. "This was great and all, but I have to go, and I'm sure you have a plane to catch." I stood my ground as I watched him mirror my actions by standing up as well. He stared at me, I could tell he wanted to say something but his mind wasn't fast enough to think of the words. I grabbed my bag, "do me a favor and leave a tip." I said as I brushed past him, my eyes looking forward.

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