"Claire!" I see her by a tree near the church, sucking on a lollipop like always. Her hair gleams in the sunlight. I run to her. Suddenly, I'm standing right in front of her, and she doesn't see me. Tears stream down her face. Alex shoves me out of the way. "He didn't come," Claire's devastated, hollow words echo through my soul and tear a hole through my heart. I drop down to my knees. "Claire," i say, "Baby I love you. I love you so much, and I've been doing everything to try to get back to you." Alex hugs her tight and kisses her head, despite my efforts to redeem myself. "I will never leave you. Not like Caspian." She smiles through her tears and looks into his eyes. "I know you won't" She sits up, looking right at me. "I thought you were different," she said. I reach for her and realize I'm being restrained. Carrie hugs me tighter from behind. "Carrie..." She silences me with a kiss, constricting me. I open my eyes to the bright white light. I've only been here for two weeks, and I've seen the surgery room seven times. The worst part was that they never tell me when, so I will always wake up unknowing. Doris, in her crisp white suit came over to check my vitals. "All good! Well Caspian, you sure are a star patient." I know that I have been in the surgery room the most times in two weeks-- we are allowed to view our charts. But why? Why me? Doris looked at me questioningly. "That was some dream you had just now." I shake my head. "How do you know what I dreamed?" "Oh, sweetie, we know everything." She gives me a wink, and walks outside. I shiver, and hold my head in my hands, worried. If they've seen Claire and Alex in my dreams, they must be looking for them. And what about Carrie? Do they know about the kiss? What will they do to us-- to her? I think about yesterday, when I kissed her. I was having hallucinations again, but this time they were worse. I felt like I was with Claire; I could feel her warm breath against my neck when she whispered in my ear. "Caspian," she said. "I missed you so much." I smiled at her, turning around to face her. She sat in my lap, guiding my face to hers. "What are you doing here?" I asked, gesturing to the shabby space around us. "It's pouring rain outside, and technically, I'm at work." She laughed. "Like I said, I missed you." It was my turn to laugh. "Red, you missed me? I missed you so much. Please, never break up with me again." "Never." I watched closely as her red hair turned blonde, and her skin grew very pale. It was Carrie who was sitting on my lap. Unlike most of my hallucinations and dreams, this had never happened before.  Claire had never come to visit me at the gallery after we had gotten back together-- especially while I was working. She would only come visit me after I was done with my shift. Carrie kissed me again, harder and more willingly this time. "Casper," I heard her groan.  Kissing Carrie was so different from kissing Claire. With Claire, I had so much room to explore, and I could feel her every move like it was my own.  Carrie guided me like I was a toddler walking trough a forest. I had no idea what she was going to do next. She broke the kiss suddenly. "Caspian," she said. "We better stop before we get caught," I nodded, looking at the door. The guard was gone. She sat up, licking her lips and bringing me with her.  "Carrie, can you tell me what just happened?" She looked at me, puzzled. "You don't know what just happened?" I shook my head, giving her a serious look. "Well," she started, snaking closer to me. "You put your arm around my waist and told me that you loved me, and kissed me." I smiled at her cautiously. What was I going to do? How was I going to explain it all? What if Claire found out? Disregarding it, I smiled at her again. "Of course, that's what happened." Throughout the rest of the day trying to avoid her, but it was next to impossible. She was always clinging to me like Claire should be. I sit up, trying not to think about the kiss further. For a few minutes, I try to stay lucid and aware, but I nod off. At lunch, I sit next to Carrie, who is beaming. "Why are you so happy?" "Because I am." I laugh, and part my hair. She stiffens, suddenly serious. "Did you wake up in the surgery room this morning?" "Yeah," I give her a slight nod. "Why, did you?" She shakes her head, and puts her hand on my cheek. "Caspian, I care about you so much-- so much. The surgery isn't good. We have no idea what the hell they're doing to you, to us." She gestures to the empty space between us. I shake my head, brushing off her hand. "Look, Carrie I'm sorry but there is no us." I could see the tears in her eyes already. "What-- you mean you still think that you're going to see what's her face again?" "Claire." I correct, closing my eyes. "Dude, do you see my hair color? We are the perfect match. Think about it-- what's your last name?" I shake my head again. "No- Carrie I'm sorry, but it's not going to happen." The bell rings, and I see Carrie giving me evil looks. "Drawing room. Four o' clock." I nod. My day isn't going to get any easier. My time at this hell hole has been short, but what I've learned has almost been worth it. It's close to my family; Claire, my parents. The surgery has something to do with the government-- something to do with DNA modification. Carrie has a way of breaking into files-- figuring things out. Truthful things. That alone lifts my spirits. Maybe she can find Claire.