Ashkii had told himself to try his best to forget about what had happened at the bar with Giovanni. It's been two weeks, and there hasn't been a day that's passed that he hasn't thought about it. At least, he managed not to look at Giovanni in the face, but that was mostly over shame more than anything else. He couldn't help that he found the thought of Giovanni sucking him off attractive, but he felt embarrassed—Very embarrassed. He touched himself to the thought, and maybe he'd browsed the gay version of porn hub every now and again just to have a better thought of what it would look like. The guilt weighed on him so much he could barely even talk to Giovanni through texting, and slowly they had drifted apart, and it worried Ashkii, so he reached out, proposing they meet up, and hang out. He couldn't lose Giovanni's friendship, regardless of whatever fucked up nonsense he thought about when rubbing one out in the shower.

     Ashkii kept looking at his phone as five in the evening approached. He'd agreed on that time with Giovanni, and the bartender had informed him that he was on his way. He would be at Ashkii's place at any moment now. Ashkii lived in a basement apartment just off-campus. It was cheap for its size—a bit run down, but he was also allowed to use the backyard, and the internet came with rent—and hopefully, it could fully load the movie he was planning to stream when Giovanni got there.

     He sat on the second-hand sofa he'd bought off the landlord, staring into his apartment as he waited. He wasn't sure why he was so nervous. Maybe it was because it'll be the first time Giovanni would be at his place, or maybe he simply didn't trust himself enough to act right around the bartender. He pushed that doubt to the back of his mind and waited patiently. When he heard a knock on the door, he scrambled to his feet and hurried towards the door. When he opened it, it revealed Giovanni, staring down at him with a hint of a smile.

     "It's like a 15-minute drive from my place, that's not bad," the man said as he kicked off his shoes. Ashkii noticed that Giovani was wearing color—which was surprising to him because he hadn't seen him in many contexts outside the bar where he wore black on black. Giovani was in a round blue sweater vest he wore over a white long-sleeved top. He was wearing washed off jeans,

     "Hey," the man said, stretching out his hand to reveal a bag dangling from a strap. "I brought some things if that's okay. Your shirt's in it too."

     "Thanks..." Ashkii trailed, taking the bag before stepping aside from the door. Giovanni walked in, and Ashkii's eyes followed the man, watching how he paused to take in the whole apartment before heading over to the sofa and taking a sit.

"It's a nice place," Giovanni said. "It's big."

"Yeah, it is," Ashkii said, closing the front door before wandering over to the kitchen counters that oversaw the living room. He emptied the bag, taking out the pack of beer and the white wine Giovanni had brought along. There was also a deck of cards and a couple of chocolate bars. Ashkii didn't know how to play any card game to save his life, so he might have to disappoint Giovanni on that one.

     "Oh, is this the movie you wanted us to watch?" Giovanni asked, making Ashkii look over at the screen.

     "Yeah," he said, swallowing a bit as screen grabs of the lost in space movie came up on the screen. "If you're not a fan of stuff like this, we can watch something else." They were probably going to be drinking and talking and not paying much attention, either way, so Ashkii wasn't picky about the movie. It would be background noise, regardless.

     "Nah, it's fine. It looks interesting. Benny likes stuff like this," Giovanni said with a little smile.

     "Who's Benny?" Ashkii's voice came up a little too loud, making Giovanni look up at him with a raised brow.

     "My hairdresser... why?"

     Ashkii shrugged. "Oh, I was just wondering." He wasn't. He had gotten jealous and reacted badly at the sound of a random man's name. He just hoped Giovanni wouldn't read too much into how oddly he was asking. "Do you want to start with the wine or beer?" he asked, trying to take the attention away from his random outburst.

     "Wine please," Giovani said, taking off his vest. "I'm a beer lightweight."

     Ashkii poured them both each a glass. He walked over to the sofa and handed Giovanni his before settling down on the sofa beside him. He picked up the remote from the coffee table in front of them and pressed play. The movie started, and both of them sat in awkward silence tinged with sounds of them sipping from wine glasses as the movie started.

     "How has school been for you? You told me it was a bit busy," Giovanni asked, pulling a knee on the couch so that he was arched in a way that was comfortable towards Ashkii. The younger man seemed to think about the question for a bit before shrugging.

     "It's been okay, it's a lot easier that's for sure," Ashkii said, taking a sip of wine and looking towards the screen. He couldn't look at Giovanni for too long before feeling his face heat up. "Exam week is coming soon, and there are a lot of project assignments. There's nothing wrong with the assignments, my teammates are just lazy and it's stressing me out."

     Giovanni chuckled, and Ashkii's stomach flipped. He just realized how sweet it sounded. He hadn't noticed that before.

     "I never went to university, trade school, or any of that. I just did some certificates, and that's about it, but group projects sound like hell. I have a friend who's just getting out of her master's program, and she complains about that a lot," Giovanni said. "How about your job? I wasn't really listening to you the last time you were trying to catch me up on that, sorry..."

     "Well, it's been going okay," Ashkii said, biting his lower lip as something irritating from the gym crossed his mind. "Some customers are something else though."

     Giovanni laughed. "Well, it's like that in most customer service jobs, you'll get used to it." There was silence for a bit as the two watched the movie. Nothing out of the ordinary for a sci-fi flick was happening. The typical space exploration and colonization plot. They ticked Ashkii off a bit, but it was quite expected from a film from the nineties.

     "Are you seeing anyone?"

     At first, Ashkii thought he had imagined that question, but it slowly dawned on him that Giovanni had actually asked it, and it wasn't a figment of his own twisted thoughts. He looked over at Giovanni who didn't seem fazed, just attentive, with the slightest of smiles on his face—fuck, Ashskii wasn't supposed to be looking at his mouth. He took a deep breath, looking away from Giovanni before shrugging his shoulders.

     "No." He managed to get through his lips as he stared out into the living room that was getting darker with the evening.

     "Why not? School? I'm guessing things are too busy to date around."

     Ashkii swallowed the air in his mouth as he wondered why Giovanni was still probing. "Yeah, I'm busy," he said, leaning back on the couch. Yeah, but not bust enough to stop thinking about him. The voice in Ashkii's head was a little smug—a tad rude too, but it was right. Giovanni did occupy a concerning amount of time in his thoughts. Heck, he couldn't even remember the last time he had even thought of a woman or browsed dating sites. The stress from dropping out of his program and then getting to know Giovanni over the past few months made sure the lanky sweet man was the only thing in his head.

     "That makes sense," Giovanni said. "Though, you can't really live like that for very long," he added, frowning a bit before humming. "Maybe that's just me, though. I suppose there's a lot of people who don't think of getting laid every other Tuesday." He laughed. Ashkii didn't. The comment wasn't funny to him. The idea of Giovanni sleeping with random people made him quite upset, actually.

     "Well..." Giovanni sighed, sliding down a bit on the side of the couch. "I guess that wasn't funny."

     "I—"

     "Like I get it. It's probably weird talking about this with a gay dude," Giovanni said, shrugging his shoulders and sitting up a bit. "And now that I think about it, someone quite older than you," he said with a little chuckle. "Now that I think about it, how old are you exactly?"

     "I'm twenty..." Ashkii said, deciding to reach out for a bag of chocolate. He wasn't sure how the conversation topics had changed so fast, but what he did know was that he was barely keeping up. "I'll be twenty-one in two months," he added, noticing how quiet Giovanni had gotten.

     "Oh, okay," the bartender said, nodding his head.

     Ashkii wasn't sure what to think of Giovanni's curt response. "What's the matter?" he asked before eating some chocolate. "You seem shocked."

     "Well, I knew you were young, but not twenty..." Giovanni trailed, staring at Ashkii in a way that made him shiver.

     "H-how old are you?" Ashkii asked, trying to diverge the attention from himself.

     "I'm twenty-six," the man said.

     Ashkii raised his brow. "You acted so shocked as if you were eons older than me. Was quite afraid for a bit that you're forty and just didn't look it."

     "Well, I might as well be," Giovanni said, laughing a bit. His tone had a sense of playfulness, and brief interaction was enough to make Ashkii's stomach do a backflip. God, the man was a natural tease. He didn't think he was going to survive just friendship with him. A little recklessness tinged with a bit of alcohol made Ashkii ask his next question.

     "What's—what's being with a guy like?"

     Aside from the television, there wasn't a sound from either Ashkii or Giovanni after that. The two of them seemed to be shocked by what he said. Giovanni's eyes had gone wide. He had both legs on the couch now, with his hands folded on his lap, and his knees bent slightly to fit into the small space.

     "Why are you asking me that?" the bartender asked in a low tone. "Do you really want to know, or are you just trying to start a conversation? Because, you know, we can talk about something else," he said, taking his eyes away from Ashkii.

     Ashkii looked down at the small space between them. If he reached out, he could touch Giovanni's feet. They were just as slender as the rest of him, and he only just noticed the nails on his toes were painted a pastel blue. Giovanni seemed like a very feminine person, and he knew he shouldn't think it, but he felt that it could work—both of them, that is—in a sexual situation. "I... I was just curious. I haven't been friends with many gay people," he said, still staring at Giovanni's feet. "And you seem like you have a lot of experience."

     "Hm." The older man signed, and Ashkii wasn't sure if that was a good sign or not. "What's it like being with women?"

     Ashkii looked up, raising a brow.

     "If you answer that question, I'll answer yours," the older man said, picking up the glass he has on the coffee table they'd pulled closer to them over the course of the movie. "I'm curious about that too, I think."

     "Well, women are soft... And warm..."

     "All of them are?" Giovanni asked, making Ashkii pause for a bit.

     "Well, no," the younger man shrugged. "I guess softer, chubbier women are my preference," he mumbled under his breath, feeling his cheeks warm up. "Though I've only ever slept with two people. So I don't know—"

     "I get what you're saying. You find women like that more attractive, and it's the sort of thing you watch." Giovanni said the second half with a knowing smile, and Ashkii just looked down at his lap. Sure, that was what he used to watch, but now... God, let's just say he hadn't watched anything but blowjob videos for a while. Ashkii's eyes glanced up a bit, focusing on Giovanni's mouth. He knew it shouldn't, but it was hard to keep his eyes away from the older man. His lips glistened today from all the wine. They looked inviting.

     Ashkii wanted to kiss him.

     He looked down again, deciding that staring at the man's feet was a safer bet.

     "Well, what's it like being with men?" the younger man asked, remembering that he'd been promised an answer.

     There was a sigh from the other end, and then a chuckle that came off a bit unsettled. "Exciting," he said in a blunt tone. "I like being held. It's exciting." Ashkii wasn't sure what any of those words meant per se. Being held? Exciting? Giovanni was talking in circles.

     "Being held?" Ashkii asked in a low tone, looking up. He made sure to keep eye contact with Giovanni this time so that his eyes didn't drift off below his nose. "What does that mean?"

     Giovanni snorted, then chucked, then he shook his head. All in succession. Ashkii just stared. He wasn't sure what exactly was funny.

     "Well, I just sit there..." Giovanni said. "Lie there, kneel there..." he went on. "I let things happen. I don't like being in charge," he said, taking a sip of wine as things seemed to click for Ashkii. His face warmed up, and he wasn't sure why. He'd expected that from Giovanni. The man didn't seem like the domineering type, and especially not right next to the people he seemed to have an eye for.

     Right.

     He had a type.

     The reminder made Ashkii broody again.

     "Can I use your bathroom?" Giovanni said, standing up suddenly.

     "Sure," Ashkii said, watching the man drop his wine glass before looking around the basement apartment. "It's the door to the left of the one with a calendar on it," Ashkii said, and Giovanni muttered a quick thank you before slipping away. Ashkii watched him, wondering if it'd be too much to ask another risqué question when he got back. He just wanted to know what his chances were, if any.