Yoochun,

How have you been keeping? I've been fine, though a little bit lonely. People say I'm looking much healthier now, and that my body is starting to fill out again. I suppose it's a good thing.

I went to the beach again today, Yoochun. It was a beautiful sunset, and the reflections of the sun made the water glitter. There's something about walking along the shore with waves lapping at my ankles, looking up at the setting sun that's romantic. It reminds me a lot of you. It's beautiful and poetic, and at the same time rough and wild.

It was a windy day, and I had to keep brushing my hair out of my eyes. I felt this sense of peace, of belonging. I think it was the first time I genuinely smiled for a long time. Somehow, that made me feel like a traitor to you.

Do you remember how we'd visit the beach every weekend? We'd just pack a picnic, get in the car and go. I can remember one perfect day where we stayed until the night started to fall and you ran through the waves wildly. You looked just like an over-excited child. You'd laugh and throw cupped handfuls of water at me. I'd laugh and throw them back.

I wonder if you can remember any of this. It all seems so pointless, keeping memories like that. Although memories are what keep us going, keep us optimistic. Memories are the only thing keeping me optimistic. Thinking about it now, can you remember what Yunho said about us?

Yunho said we were like colors. Dependant on one another to exist. One without the other is useless. He said we were like melody and harmony, because harmony is nothing without a melody. Those words still make me cry, Yoochun. We were just sat there, hand in hand, whispering sweet nothings to each other when he said that. We cried together.

I remember, rely on memories because of you. You are my light, you make me strong when things in life take a wrong turn. Hold me close and never let me go. I'll see you soon.

Love, Jaejoong.

Jaejoong wiped the single, pearl shaped tear from his porcelain cheek. He put down the pen, and folded the letter neatly in half. He lifted it to his lips and kissed the paper. Moving as though he'd shatter if he went any faster, he slipped the letter into an envelope, addressed it, and stuck a stamp to it.

He looked up to the walls, plastered with photographs of his hospitalised self and gave a heavy sigh. He stood up and opened his closet. His ghostly grey eyes flitted to the box at the bottom. Jaejoong lifted it out, opened the lid and put the letter inside, on top of all the others.

Jaejoong put the box back, and moved to his bed, sat down and picked up the framed photograph of Yoochun and himself. Happy smiles and warm embraces. He shook his head.

He remembers, relies on memories because of Yoochun. Yoochun was his light, and made him strong when his life took a wrong turn. He wanted to feel strong arms holding him close, never letting him go again. But he'd never see Yoochun again. The beautiful, poetic Yoochun, who gave his life for Jaejoong.

--

If you have any questions, feel free to ask ^^