Murderer: Any last words?

Violet: Do you think I'm cute? Be honest.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Charlie: Oh, fiddlesticks! That really ruffles my feathers!

Jay: Please, just say fuck.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Violet: You're jealous.

Jay: Jealous?

Violet: That's why you were being so negative about this.

Jay: That's absurd. I'm always negative.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Charlie: That's illegal, right?

Jay: Why do you care? Are you a fucking cop?

Charlie: No-

Jay: Then shut the fuck up.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Simon: Hey, can you do me a favor?

Jay: Sorry, I have to go do literally anything other than this.

Simon: You don't even have a legitimate reason?

Jay: Oh, no, I do.

Simon: Well, what is it?

Jay: You see, I simply don't give a fuck.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Violet: I am darkness. I am power. I am your worst nightmare. I could kill a man in more ways than you can imagine. I am the night. I am fury, I am a weapon, I am-

Bruce: A doll.

Jay: A cinnamon roll.

Simon: A sweetheart.

Violet:

Violet: ... Stop it.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Jay: Did you buy eggs like I asked?

Violet: Even better!

Jay: What the fuck did you-

Violet: **holding up a chicken** Her name is Fluffy.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Demon: Hey, I took your soul last month and-

Jay: No returns.

Demon: **sobbing** But it's making me sad...

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Violet: Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, and wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Simon: That's deep.

Charlie: That means that ketchup is a smoothie.

Simon: That's deeper.

Jay: ... You guys are idiots.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Charlie: Mister Simon isn't talking to me.

Jay: Enjoy it while it lasts.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Simon: Truth or dare?

Violet: Truth.

Simon: How many hours have you slept this week?

Violet:

Violet: Dare.

Simon: Go to sleep.

Violet: I don't like this game.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Jay: Life is like Charlie. It's short.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Charlie: Is that a gun?!

Jay: It's not what it looks like!

Charlie: It looks like a gun!

Jay: Okay, maybe it is what it looks like, but in my defense, it doesn't have any more bullets, so I technically can't shoot it anymore.

Charlie: ... ANYMORE?!

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Simon: Yeah I'm LGBT.

Simon: cuLt leader.

Simon: God hates me personally.

Simon: cowBoy hat.

Simon: **sniffles** Trying my best.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Jay: I'm having problems with a guy...

Simon: Like his dead body won't fit into your trunk kind of problems, or you like him kind of problems?

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Simon: Charlie... I'm bleeding...

Charlie: What's your type?!

Simon: Brown hair, red eyes, gray clothes, cute smile-

Charlie: Your blood type, Mister Simon!

Simon: Oh.

Simon: **peers at his wound**

Simon: Uhh, red.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Jay: Oh, so when crows remember people who wronged them and hold grudges, it's "intelligent" and "really cool".

Jay: But when I do it, I'm "petty" and "need to let it go".

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Jay: What is it called when you kill a friend?

Violet: Homicide.

Simon: Murder.

Bruce: Homiecide.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Bruce: Which country has the most birds?

Bruce: Portu-geese!

Jay: That's a language.

Bruce: Portu-gull?

Jay: Good recovery.

Violet: I think you mean good re-dovery.

Simon: TURKEY. HOW DID WE MISS TURKEY?

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Jay: I'm not funny, I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Charlie: You're smiling. What happened?

Jay: What? Can't I smile just because I feel like it?

Violet: Simon tripped and fell down the stairs today.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

That's it for now!