I often wonder how life could be,
If I made a different choice.
Whether it would be better or miserable,
Crying or rejoice.

Every would've if I could've,
When there is always a yes or no.
Nothing is truly set in stone,
If I wanted I could go.

Yet I feel stuck in the decision I made,
Committed to an unhealthy end.
As if my longing and loyalty are warring with each other,
Which my brain can't comprehend.

It's overwhelming to feel loss,
Despite wanting to be done.
With a promise you made, no direct time,
Feeling the last note is sung.

I can see the smiles of those I touch,
Turning to frowns and cry.
Chaining me to a post to stay,
Unless I move or die.

There's always another to take my place.
But they are not quite like me.
For I am the illusion they have come to know.
Stuck in my loyalty.