The Faerie Forest by @CayliRhea CHAPTERS 1-3 AGAIN.

Upon second reading, there were some very minute errors. Nonetheless, I'll go through them.

Comma splits were still present (this can easily be solved with a semi colon. I tried to mark all of these up for you).

Dialogue was formatted slightly wrongly. You constantly had commas before the dialogue but this isn't necessary - a simple full stop is fine.

E. G.

Linda tapped her finger against the kitchen table. "I wish it would stop raining."

You see what I mean?

(For the above, I pointed out this mistake in the comments for the first few but then stopped because there were so many. I think it's pretty self-explanatory of what you have to do for the rest).

Occasional syntax errors that could have been improved. Some spelling errors but there were very few and they were all very minor.

Now onto the good things.

I CAN TELL HOW MUCH EFFORT YOU'VE PUT INTO THIS. Honestly it's so incredible to see. You've really taken onboard my comments and adapted them to fit into your writing. This has improved your work so SO much!!

You had beautiful descriptions that really enhanced the writing (for example, the one of Darion I could see you'd worked on. Keep it as flowing as this throughout.)

I thought the scene with the kiss was absolutely fantastic and magical. I found it was the best bit.

Overall, a fantastic edit and comeback after my comments. I honestly couldn't be more pleased. Some minute, tiny corrections need to be done but once they're done, these 3 chapters will be almost immaculate. Well done!!

Please remember that this is a critique, NOT a criticism. Please spread the word!

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