Recommended song: love is gone (acoustic version) by SLANDER

Have you ever heard a song that you can relate to?

Even if there were no words? No lyrics but the melody just makes you feel related to them.

As if your soul has been intertwines with the melody and send flying out in spirit of joy or intertwines with your body hugging your soul as you rack with painful sobs together with them?

As is the melody was bringing you down on your knees and there is no one to comfort you...just yourself in a void with melody.

Jimin felt the same at the moment as he lay his head on the cold window flowering with cold water giving shiver to his body yet he didn't pulled away.

What's the point of it when it makes you feel numb right?

His fingers runs occasionally through the best friend who was not a backstabber.

His diary.

He remembers everything, everything seems to imprinted on his memory that he didn't know was a curse or boon.

His heart ached and yet there was nothing he could do.

No amount of money or riches could turn back time to where he was genuinely happy.

When his smile would curl up his lips...when her lips would curl up in a smile.

Everyday seems like an endless torture now, he wanted to break, cry, scream and give up in end.

"You can't," he tried to convince himself.

"You promised Jimin you can't," he mumbled to himself as crystal fell down his cheeks painting colourlessly at his smooth skin.

"Don't you dare give you, you promised," he mumbled trying to hold on to the small diminishing life in the cold weather.

Maybe there is no spring and it will forever be cold, freezing...lonely.

The diary in his hand slipped to ground creating a soft thud landing on cold floor with no life.

Jimin kept staring at the window as the entry was left open.

Dear diary,

People say that love makes you crazy, it makes you do things you never imagined.

They say love hurts...yes it does.

To see her in someone's arms...it hurts.

To see her smile at someone...it hurts.

To see her caring for someone else who ain't me...it hurts.

It's twisting my entire soul into agony.

Why did I fell for her? Why me? Why did I?

It hurts so much.

Why me? What was my fault that I didn't knew she was with someone?

Why?

Jimin still remembers when it first happened.

How normal it was yet how wrong it felt.

His arm wrapped around her waist while she smile at him pierced his heart.

Her sweater resting in his hand as tears left his eyes watching them.

It hurts...that's the only thing he had on his mind.

She was mine.

Jimin didn't knew how or when but he couldn't take it anymore.

The breath in his throat was stuck suffocating him to death...it would have been better if he was dead.

His fingers was cleathing into the thread of the sweater some threads snapping under the hold.

He could still hear the booking of his words in his ears as if cursed.

"After all she is my girlfriend," his smooth and deep voice echoed the hall of his memories that he wanted to erase.

Walking towards the empty corridors he bumped into some people not even caring about anything.

His feet automatically ventured to his peace place, his safety...the music room.

Opening door to the long empty room and his feet feeling heavier with each step as if ground was holding his feet sinking it down to the emptiness with it desperately wanted to clutch him into itself.

As soon as he closed the door his feet gave up and he fell down on ground, his feet crumping like a paper and his sobs erupted in the quiet environment.

One love...from one sight was dangerous.

His heart broke into pieces little by little in thousands of pieces.

He loved her.

He loved Sook.

He loves her.

He still loves her.

He loves her too much that it hurt.

Why did he loved her?

He knows nothing about her.

He knew nothing.

It was just a damn one sight...was it really that much it took to love someone?

Was it really that much and yet pain so damn much?

He didn't knew how much time passed, he didn't knew how much tears he shed or how many pieces of his heart broke and how much of them were still left leaving his heart bleeding red.

How funny it was that red was color of love...yet it was color of blood.

How love was the best thing that happened yet ...it was the thing that hurt the most.

It was hell.

Jimin thought as he kept running his fingers through the strings of guitar torturing himself to have emotions.

Jimin felt as if someone threw a bucket of black paint ruining the masterpiece and hard work of his...but he couldn't do anything because no matter how many colors he tried to pour in it...it will forever be black.

He didn't knew how many cuts his fingers were having or how much blood was flowing down his finger to the fresh wood or how much his eyes were staring into blank space or what melody he was playing.

He only knew it was painful.

Resting his head to the cold tile he kept playing.

Both present Jimin and past Jimin were hurting and in pain.

His soul were in agony burning with loneliness.

There was no difference in the Park Jimin now and then... both were lost...in love ...in hurt.

One had bleeding hand, other hold a bleeding heart.

One had lost hope, other was still holding onto it that was diminishing fast.

Both were lifeless emotionally.

Though the reason never changed.

Love.

A cursed word with four letter yet so much pain.

Cruel?

Is love really that cruel?

Yes it is.

I know it went from 0 to 100 real quick don't blame me it just happened and I freaking cried writing this.

Geez this is too much.

Like and comment. Also thank you for 50+ reads in 24 hours of publishing the book.

Peace. How much did you cried?