I felt like a zombie when I got in there. The water in my clothes weighing me down as I asked for Ouma's room number and I walked up the stairs.

The whole area was so quiet except for the sound of machines beeping in the distance.

Eventually I came into a hallway and saw a bunch of patients in the hospital gowns sitting outside a door. Some were in wheelchairs or had IV's and they all looked frail as if they could break in a second.

DICE.

One with purple hair and round glasses along with a flower crown saw me and ran over.

"A-are you Saihara?" She asked tears in her eyes and I nodded and before another word they shoved me into the room.

"Hey...don't mess with the boss got it?" One threatened, "I won't" I promised and they closed the door. I turned over to look at him.

His skin was so pale I couldn't imagine how it was possible, his hair seemed oily. Maybe because how much he seemed to be sweating from whatever illness was invading his body? His arms were bony and frail. Something told me he hadn't been eating much.

His expression looked pain as the oxygen mask around his mouth kept foaming. The monitors beepinf synchronized saying he was alive.

His face didn't have any of that joyful energy I usually expected as I pulled up in a chair next to him, nearly knocking over the pills on his bed side table.

He was fast asleep, which seemed good as the bags underneath his eyes heavily suggested how long he hasn't slept for.

"Hi Ouma..." I greeted. He didn't even open his eyes. I wonder if he could tell I was there? Could he hear me?

"I found you...I didn't cheat I promise...I read all your letters...and I'm going to come every day and visit you...and if...and when you get better everythings going to change ok?" I told him. I felt tears forming, "so just focus on getting better alright?" I begged him.

He gave me no response. Just the chill of the hospital and the oxygen machine running his heart monitor assuring me he was still alive.

"I'm sorry, for the fight by the way...and all those awful things I said...about how I never should've met you...I take it all back.

"You are one the greatest people I ever met in my life. And I don't want this to be the end.

"Please drive me crazy with your jokes again, tell a thousand lies leaving me wandering around in the labyrinth you always seem to create. Make me buy you and your organization tea every single day...wake up and tease me for how flustered I get.

"I need you Ouma. I can't even imagine life without you...so when the time comes to wake up...please wake up" I begged, I didn't even notice I was crying.

I squeezed his hand tightly, and for all it was worth Ouma's expression softened at the touch.

"You won't ever get hurt again, I promise...I'm going to protect you ok?" I promised.

"So please...get better" I repeated. He didn't respond. I just tightened my grip on the boy I never imagined growing so close to.

-/-/-/-

"Hey...we didn't know if you liked coffee or tea...so we kind of got both" a boy said walking in and sitting next to me. He had long blonde shaggy hair and was leaning against an IV for support. Is it sad to say he seemed to be one of the strongest?

"Thanks" I mumbled sipping some, "he talks about you a lot...he said you were a detective is that true?" He asked. I laughed, "no my family owns an agency, I'm just an apprentice...that's just Ouma's nickname for me" I told him.

"Heh knew it, though when you came you really had everyone fooled! We had only hid the letters four days ago and you found them and him so quick, we expected a week at least" he admitted.

If I was meant to feel pride I didn't as I stared at what was meant to be a prize for the game he had made ahead of me. It would only be a prize if he lived.

"Sorry I don't know your name..." I realized, he gave me a small nod "my name is Genkei..." he told me.

Genkei. The one who recently lost his best friend.

"I'm sorry for your loss..." I mumbled, "so he told you about the rest?" He asked and I nodded.

"He isn't the first to do the letter game..." Genkei told me, "we used to hide toys around the hospital, and we would leave clues in letters to find them from each other...before Chiasa died she did those letters where we searched for letters addressed to all of us" Genkei recalled.

"Her final words, telling us it was going to be ok...that she was preparing hell to acknowledge their rightful rulers heh..." he laughed.

"It then became our morbid tradition...when it's the end we write letters for everyone to give them hope after we can't anymore...Ouma gets to play the game now I guess" he joked and I noticed he was crying.

"I hate this f*cking game, with every single bone in my body, I would be happy if I never had to see another letter ever again" he spit out bitterly.

"He asked us to hide his letters for him...so we all broke out and hid them everywhere he asked us to...and when we came back he was like this..." Genkei recalled.

"He would be happy knowing you did this for him, thank you for helping me find him" I assured him, "I just...I don't want to say goodbye again..." he sobbed, "I don't want a new leader...I don't want us all to die..." he confessed to me.

"I don't want to have death keep stealing the people I love away from me and being powerless to stop it! Why can't it ever be me? I've been slowly dying from cancer since I was six and I'm still alive at sixteen! Even when the cancer was gone I still got sick! And of course it had to come back!" He yelled.

"I just want one thing...for him...and everyone else to be together again..." he admitted. I patted his back as he wiped away his tears.

"But...I don't want him to suffer anymore...I know he already hid the letters meant for us when we left...so its soon..." he admitted.

My eyes widened, "no...he can't...he can't die..." I whispered to myself, "the machines are only prolonging...they're going to help him wake up and then let him say g-goodbye..." Genkei told me.

No. No. He can't die...he can't...

Why? Why are you so cruel life?

"But he's only seventeen..." I mumbled, "and Chiasa was only fourteen. Death doesn't care"

-/-/-/-

The land was covered in flowers. It seemed to be a meadow of sorts as I sat next to the river.

Why don't I just cross it?

The other side was blanketed in fog and I could hear a voice on the other side calling for me. The closer I got to the river the calmer and more relaxed I felt.

This side was pain, the other calm. I headed towards it when I saw her flowing red hair, blowing in the wind reminding me of fire.

"You're not going to leave without saying goodbye are you?" She asked, "not cool" she scolded me.

"But I'm tired..." I told her, "I know, you can sleep after you tell the rest goodbye ok?" She instructed.

"Since when were you the leader?" I asked, "you can scold me when you come over here" they promised, "you better believe I will Chiasa" I promised.

She gave me a small wave as I noticed three figures also waving at me, "see you soon leader!" Riko called, "don't say that it's like asking for him to join us" Mirai scolded hitting the back of her head.

"But I do?" Riko said confused and Mirai groaned, nonetheless holding Riko's hand.

"Leader tell Genkei I'll see him soon!" Takura asked and I nodded turning around and running against the pull the river held for me.

-/-/-/-

The beeping monitors rang. All I could see was darkness and all I wanted to do was sleep. I opened my eyes to see Saihara chan. I felt my eyes filling with tears, he actually came...

My chest was filled with pains as I saw DICE surronding me. Is this it...?

"Hey guys..." I greeted. I wish my voice was stronger, they were all in tears but gave me a big smile, "hey leader" they greeted.

"We're here to honorably discharge you" Eiji told me not even meeting my eyes. Oh.

"Aww we know you guys will never get rid of me, I'm to loveable" I joked, fighting the urge to go back to sleep.

"We can only hope" Takashiro joked and weak laughter was exchanged, "at least you got Saihara to bring you tea..." I told them.

"Yeah thanks..." Tsuki mumbled, "hey...I'm not going to die...ok?" I told them struggling as I raised my hand signaling a pinkie promise.

"I'm just going to take a nap ok? Heh...you guys can rest after that whenever ok?" I told them, "but we aren't dying" I instructed them.

"Promise?" I asked feeling my eyes sagging, they nodded as they inserted their pinkies into the mix.

"DICE will never die" Nao told me, "d*mn right..." I laughed looking over at Saihara.

I could feel fear overwhelming me. I didn't want to die yet, but...I placed a smile as I wore my mask one last time.

"You don't have to smile you know...can't you show us yourself one last time?" Genkei asked. I chuckled, "its part of my charm" I told him, "Takura said he'll see you later..." I yawned. A pain growing stronger in my body, the urge only increasing.

"Hey Shumai" I greeted turning over to see him, "so you actually came huh? I'm...I'm glad" I mumbled feeling myself sinking back into my bed.

I dug into my side table and handed him a letter, "it's...kind of hard to stay awake...heh..." I joked, "but...I couldn't leave without just one more letter..." I mumbled.

"Mind reading that for me...sorry I led you on a wild goose chase" I apologized. Saihara looked at me, not even trying to mask his sadness.

"I'm sorry...for everything" I whispered, my voice barely being audible.

"No...I'm sorry," Saihara said, "that I couldn't be here sooner for my best friend" he said and my eyes widened.

"So we're friends...? I'm glad...thanks for playing the game Saihara...you won" I told him, barely even keeping my head up anymore.

"It's fine...it was fun...heh I'm glad I got to see you" he told me, I nodded as I couldn't look anywhere but the ceiling and even that was fading away.

"Goodbye leader...we'll go to bed soon to...sayonara" Genkei mumbled.

This isn't fair. I lived only to suffer till I died. What kind of life is that?

It wasn't fair...but I think I'm ok with it ending today...I just want DICE to be happy...and Saihara....

As long as they are...I'm fine.

I turned over and saw the river again as I crossed it as they embraced me and we headed towards a beaming light.

-/-/-/-

Dear Saihara~

I lied. I had one last letter for you. Did I get to see you before I had to go? I hope I did but if not that's ok it isn't your fault.

I'm glad I got to meet you, and that you even managed to find this letter is amazing. I wish I could have stayed around longer with you.

I was the jerk so if it took you a while to find this letter though that's fine. I just wanted to say thanks.

I don't have long paragraphs for you. No famous last words. I can barely even write this anymore so i guess I should keep it short and sweet.

I just want you to look after DICE for me ok? They're going to need a new leader so help run the election.

I don't want them to die all sad and depressed...that wasn't why DICE was made. It was so we could be happy. And I hope they can die happy if that makes sense...

You're not allowed to be sad either ok? You made life better for me and I wish we could have played more together.

That would have been fun.

Unlike me or DICE you're going to live a long and full life aren't you Saihara? So I hope you make it the best life ever!

Tell me all about it when we meet again ok? Thanks...for being my first friend.

And one of the last. I can barely hold my pen anymore...so for the last time.

All I want is for you to be happy.
To live.

So even if its hard...promise me you will ok? Even if its scary or hard. Just live...might be hypocritical seeing all I tried to do...

But live.

Goodbye.

Love,
Kokichi Ouma