Van

When Van was eight, she sneaked into her mother's bathroom, determined to get into the makeup she knew was kept in the cabinet over the sink. Every morning she sat cross-legged in the doorway, watching Xandra swipe liquids and powders across her face in awe. Van didn't think the makeup made her mother prettier because there was no one who could compare to her mom in her eight-year-old mind, but she loved the rich pigments and bright shimmers.

Getting into the cabinet proved to be a challenge. She was small for her age, and even using her step stool, she couldn't reach the door, much less the top shelf holding the basket filled with makeup. Pulling out the drawers, she used them as steps and threw her leg over the countertop to hoist herself up.

It took a second for the pain to register. With a shriek, Van fell backward, landing on the tile floors with a jarring thud that didn't register over the burning in her flesh. Through tear-filled eyes, she stared at the blister blossoming on her shin. Later, it would turn into a scar in the shape of lips, a thin unmarred strip of flesh breaking up the redness where the clamp touched the barrel of the curling iron.

The effects of the potion started out like the curling iron incident. The fire in her chest caught her by surprise, but she couldn't escape it by falling off the counter. It grew until she collapsed in Luca's arms. She heard him tell her mother she was burning up, and then she heard no more.

But passing out didn't free Van from the agony. Instead, it made her more aware. It was as if she'd gone from warming herself over a bonfire to crawling into its center. She was trapped in the blaze, and there was no way out.

For days, she clawed at arms and legs covered in flames, feeling her skin tear and build up beneath her nails. She was the only light in a world of black, and she begged it to crush her into oblivion.

This was hell. It had to be. Her only consolation was that the pain was too great to allow her thoughts to wander far from its source. She couldn't wonder why she was being punished. She couldn't worry about the pain her death was causing her family and friends. Luca. They all ceased to exist for her.

Until, at last, the fire extinguished.

The concept of time didn't exist in this hell. Van thought she might have laid in a trembling heap for days or years before finding the strength to lift her head. A century could have passed before she was able to stand and blissfully, the memory of burning joined the memories of who she had been before coming to this place.

"H-hello?" she called out.

An echo answered her, and she reached into the darkness with a trembling hand, gasping when she saw the darkness recede. Her skin glowed with a white light that rippled when she moved. Pressing her finger to her arm, it flashed the colors of the rainbow, returning to its pure form when she pulled away.

Sitting down, she pulled her knees to her chest and stared into the black. It didn't take long for her to decide this existence was worse than burning. Now, she had time to think, only the longer she sat there, the harder it was for her to think thoughts. What was a person if not the collection of their memories and experiences? They were gone, and this world offered nothing new to replace them.

"P-please," she whispered, the syllable feeling foreign in her mouth. Her tongue was thick and didn't move correctly, making the word sound more like a grunt than any recognizable language.

Little by little the light receded from her body, bringing the shadows closer to her. Her legs were swallowed first. Then her arms. She shut her eyes, preferring the blank expanse of her mind to the monsters in the unknown darkness.

Van sighed. Hopeful. This was it. She would cease to exist in moments, and there would be peace in the nothing.

Only, she remained as she was. Finally, she needed to look. Opening her eyes, she froze, seeing herself for the first time in what felt like an eternity. A girl of sharp angles and pallid skin and eyes rimmed in the blazing white light stared back at her from a mirror, and all the lost memories crashed back into her.

"Van."

Luca. She knew that voice. Knew the touch on her arm. She slammed her eyes closed before he could see the monster she had become. She knew she was a monster. Nothing good could climb from that hellhole.

Then he shouted and fled the room. She hadn't closed them in time.

A group of people entered the room, and Luca returned to her side. Gratefulness filled her chest. The first emotion besides fear that she'd experienced since drinking the potion.

Xandra spoke first. "Van? Something is wrong."

"Luca, you said she was awake. She's just sitting up," Livy said.

"She gasped, her eyes popped open, and she sat up. I don't know why she won't open her eyes again."

A tear rolled down Van's face. He hadn't seen her. He would leave her. The fear crushed the hope.

"What if she's blind?" Bane suggested, his presence surprising Van. What all had happened since she had gone into the void?

Everyone drew in a deep breath. Luca took her hand and squeezed so hard she thought her bones might fracture. How she wished it was something as easy as being blind.

"Van," Livy said, touching her face gently. "Van, it's okay. You'll get better. A lot of greasy hamburgers from Wanda's and some fresh air will fix you right up."

"How?" Van demanded, knowing there was no way for them to understand without showing them. Opening her eyes, she turned to look at Luca first, needing to see the revulsion for herself. "How can anyone fix this?"

Luca scooped her into a hug without hesitation even as Xandra gasped and staggered into the wall. He pulled back, cupped her chin, and stared into the offending eyes.

"You had purple contacts when I met you," he chuckled, bumping his nose against hers. "This is an improvement."

Crying, she pressed her forehead against his shoulder, thankful for his attempt at humor but wishing she could make him understand. The time she spent in that barren wasteland had changed her- shifted her into something different. Perhaps something not even human. Then again, maybe that was okay. No one in this room could claim to be entirely human.

"White eyes has you freaked out?" Bane said, rolling his pair of perfectly normal eyes.

"They glow," Van huffed. "It's not normal."

"Mine do too," he rebuffed, shrugging his shoulders and drawing her attention to the fact he was shirtless. Luca's too, if the sudden flattening of his mouth was anything to go by. "Green- when I shift into a giant cat. Our bar for normal isn't exactly very high here."

She gaped at him, then burst into laughter. Of all the people she would have bet on to make her feel better, Bane wasn't in the top ten. Hell, he wasn't even on the list.

"We need to get the doctor in here to look her over," Luca said, refusing to leave her side.

Xandra nodded. Unlike the shifter, she seemed intent on putting as much distance as possible between herself and her daughter, and all the endorphins caused by the burst of laughter fled Van's system. There was something wrong with her. She'd been foolish to think otherwise, even for a moment.

"A witch too," her mother said.

"Why?" Livy demanded, her prickly nature rearing its head.

"Van needs a doctor because her body is undernourished, but her physical injuries healed while she was in the coma. Any other ailments she possesses will be magical in nature. We still don't understand entirely what was in that potion. We haven't found Abe's documents on it, and he's not exactly in the right state of mind to share. Perhaps it'll tell us why her eyes are white."

Van stiffened at the mention of her father. "He's here? He's still alive?"

"Unfortunately," Bane muttered, stomping from the room. Livy gave Luca a worried look before scurrying after the other boy.

"Let's get you some food and some rest, and we can talk about everything later," Xandra said, infusing the command with the motherly affection Van remembered so well.

Motherly affection aside, Van was having none of it. "I think I've rested long enough. Um, how long was I out?"

"3 weeks." Anguish twisted Luca's features. "3 miserable weeks."

"I want to see Abe."

"I don't think-"

"I'm not asking," Van insisted, throwing her thin legs over the side of the bed. She looked at Luca for help, knowing without him she wouldn't be able to make it anywhere. "No one has survived long after drinking this potion. You won't find anything in his papers. I have to talk to him."

Sighing, Luca slid his arms around her waist, his touch far gentler than it had been earlier, almost as if was afraid of breaking her. A whiff of something sour reached her nose, and Van winced.

"But first, a shower."