25th January 1984

Hey, diary!

Don't know where to start and where to end, But I know something is wrong somewhere. Life ever changes in overnight. Who expects my father will shed a huge auto bomb by arranging my marriage with Neel Chatterjee when i actually came to my home to tell them every truth which I hid from them. It happened in a spark. I couldn't say anything to him when my every family members in the house preparing for my wedding.

For the past two days, I have been trying but didn't get any privacy to talk to anyone, How will i tell them, I can't marry anyone by having a child on my womb. Without consultation, I have gone through all the pre-marriage rituals. But i already destined with someone else and also carrying his part in my womb. But my suffering came to an end when i saw a man with crushed kurthi with old specs entered my room and closed the door at the instant when every woman in my room went out to see the Groom's welcoming. 

His one spark enough to drop all the fears which i had in my heart. I really had no idea when i ran towards him and hugged him. My heartbeat which was irregular became normal out of sudden. He hugged me back tighter and showered me with kisses which relaxed me to the core. 

"We have no time... We have to leave, Come..." he broke the hug and held my hands, Our fingers intertwined. Everything was planned. He took me towards the back gate, and There was an old ambassador car waited for us, In ready. Nivansh waved his hands who was sitting in the driver seat. Shivaay waved him. Without getting caught, We both sat inside the car. But When i saw my families happy faces, I couldn't control my tears. I really didn't want to do that,  I really don't want to complicate things like this. If i had time, I would have definitely convinced them. But Everything went ahead so fast. 

"I don't know what happened to my baba, suddenly," i asked shivaay who was sitting next to me while caressing my palms. 

"He come to know about our relationship..." shivaay said and shocked me at that spot. 

"How do you know that?" - That was my next question. 

"He visited my home town, Before two weeks..." - shivaay said and this time it's getting confused. 

"I am a book of secrets anika..." - He said and things he told shook me to an extent, I never thought this would be the reason behind everything thing, For a second, My whole world went upside down and

"And what?" Arushi yelled while trying to read the half-torn pages in the diary. Avinash took it in his hands and tried to read. Meanwhile, Anika searched for the other diaries in the box. 

"This ending driving me crazy" Aru yelled and searched the box, Instead of the diary she got a letter which her father wrote after six months they eloped. she read it silently. 

Dear Shona,

How are you, Shona? It had been six months without you but i am living in the hell, Shona. Each every minute going leaving a huge pain in my heart. I know i shouldn't have fixed the marriage with neel without your consultation. I did it because i want you by my side. Do you think your father could do anything like this without thinking about you? Your happiness means everything to me, Shona. I know you're pregnant, Don't worry! i am not mad at you But instead worried about you. I came to know about your relationship with Shivaay by neel who visited your college once and saw you together. But i didn't ask you anything. Instead, I gathered information about him and visited his home town. You have no idea what i actually heard about him and his family. 

I want you alive Shona, Come back home. I will take care of you. Don't worry about society, I will handle everything. Please Shona, My dear, My tigress come back to your father. please. I am leaving this letter to your friend, thinking that it will reach you. I just want you to be happy, Please dear.

With love,

your Baba. 

"What are you reading?" Avi asked her, Aru immediately crushed the letter and nodded no to him. But she couldn't help herself from re-thinking about her promise to her dad and her last conversation to her dad before his death. 

"Accha(papa), Here is where i born?" - Eight years old Aru while laying on shivaay's chest. They came to India from Italy for the first time after six years. 

"Ahh... You born here..." - Shivaay said while caressing her hair. 

"This place is very beautiful, Achha" - Aru exclaimed, shivaay kissed her forehead and asked her to sleep. Aru immediately sat on the bed and faced shivaay straight. 

"Even you born here?" - Aru asked. 

"I born in Wayanad..."  - Shivaay said. 

"But you said we both born in India?" - Aru asked while scratching her neck in confusion. 

"Don't scratch your neck...  I will explain it to you" - Shivaay said and went towards his drawer and brought Indian map to her. 

"See, This is Bangalore where you born and this place is called Wayanad, Where i born... In the end, we both born in India not any other country" - Shivaay explained it to her.

"Oh...So we visited my birthplace, now we will go to Wayanad to visit your birthplace..." - Aru asked her. he said no in an instant which made aru to jerk in shock. 

"WE WON'T BE GOING THERE... AND PROMISE ME THAT YOU WILL NEVER EVEN THINK OF GOING TO THAT PLACE" -  He asked her in an instant. 

"it's confusing di..." - Avi's voice dragged her from her thought. 

"Whatever meant to have happened, Already happened... they both are no more now..." - Aru said after the long pause with a welled up eyes. 

"Di, Why dad said he's a book of secrets?" - Avi asked her in a confused tone. 

"Avi... Leave this topic..." - Aru asked him in a patient tone. 

"Do you remember anything? did dad tell anything about it?" - Avi asked Aru in a same tone. 

"Avi, What was your agenda behind when you convinced me to read her diary?" - Aru asked. 

"You wanted to wipe the hate from my heart which i had for our mom for a long time..." - Aru added Avi was speechless. 

"You won, More than respecting her, I started to love her. I really want to lay in her lap and say sorry, But i couldn't able to do that Because she's no more. And after twenty years, I am feeling her demise now... I wish i would have cried for her then by looking at her face... Now even i wish, Neither i can see her face nor I can touch her... I graved a very big mistake..." - Aru broke down and Avi tried to console her but she wasn't ready to stop crying. But more than the pain, Curiosity burned in her heart thinking what would have happened in his mom's life after getting married to father. 

**********

"Aru, Don't..." - Shivaay started to murmur in sleep when he saw the glimpse of eight years Arushi opening an old door. His whole body started to tremble and the next second he started to yell with Arushi's name. Pinky rushed to his room and woke him up from his dream. 

"What? What happened, shivaay?" - Pinky asked while wiping his sweats which formed in his forehead because of the nightmare. 

"Aru..." - He started to narrate. Pinky quenched a glass of water from him. 

"Aru?" - He forgot what he was about to narrate. 

"What Aru? Which Aru?" - Pinky asked him in a confused tone while wiping his face with her dupatta. 

"I forgot..." - Shivaay said. 

"And Why you took anika's name continuously?" - Pinky asked him. He looked at her perplexedly. 

"You know before 4 months When you are with your Nani, Anika once came to our house when Shakthi ji was there..." - Pinky said. 

"Sakthi caught her when she was using his phone without his permission... From then, A Bad impression created in his mind for anika... That's why he behaved with her like that... don't take it in your mind" - pinky added. 

"Maa... What happened to Mr Noor, Why he dragged his wife like that?" - Shivaay asked her. 

"Mrs Noor was cheating her husband by having multiple affairs..."- Pinky said. 

"How?" - Shivaay asked even though he knew it. 

"He got a message from an anonymous number..." - pinky said. Tears formed in his eyes when he recalled her words in his mind but he didn't let that out. Kissing him good night, Pinky left his room, But this time anika stole his sleep where he already lost his peacefulness long time back. He couldn't recall, because of what he was avoiding her calls, by hurting himself. When Anika left him that night, He experienced that much pain which he couldn't describe in words. In the fear of experiencing it again, he cut all the contact with her. But he never knew the fate will play like this. 

Now, He desperately needed her by his side. Her words, "fight for yourself" Banged inside his ears. He decided rather than being coward and introvert, he will start to fight for himself and his love, Whatever it may cost. He understood she's none other than his soul's bliss and without her, he's no more.