it's there
i can see it
the edge of the timeline

right there, where nothing else was posted before
i scrolled way too far, and now there's nothing
to ogle at, to make my chest feel less empty

it's coming up, but i want to stop
there's no reason why things can't
just pause, right? i wish there

was a button for it, it would
be so much better, because then
we wouldn't have to worry about

the timeline, disrupt it
make sure it remains unstable
without the pictures, there's nothing

before it, so i have to create them
from memory, there's a skill that permeates
which helps to fantasize and be imaginative

but reality wishes to ground us so hard
that it pulls me off guard into another
breakdown, hellhound, there's no guardian angel for you

she won't appear from them like you
want, to hug someone through a phone
is impossible, you know this, you already

know how far away you are to everything
you've had to walk everywhere your whole life
you've worked hard all your life

and now, at the beginning of adulthood,
there's something which yearns you back
to the days where work was self-inflicted

self-imposed, like straining your heart for three
years, you had went on that tangent for
too long, spoke pooh bear's name way too

much for everybody's liking, but you've liked
all her photos, even if she blocked you,
and you'd do the same to hers, too

if you could see what she's up to,
but you're cut off, like always, that's okay
it always has been -- see? i'm smiling