-: Tacenda :-
(n.) Things better left unsaid

Inaya's POV,

I flick my pen around my fingers for the nth time . The blank word document staring up at me with a blinking cursor . A white page lay flat in front of me , listing the tasks I need to finish and submit by tomorrow.

Topics from which I would chose two , to write for the e-magazine which also the has the hard copy, sold out in a matter of weeks when it is issued. Yes , after "quitting" my dream , my passion and my everything, as a criminal journalist, I started to feel like writing , but being a writer and becoming a hot-shot in just a day is as easy as seeing our fictional loves in real life . Which is next to impossible.

So, when "Thoughts" let out an advertisement to hire a writer who would also manage the media platforms they are related in online, I couldn't withhold myself but immediately take up the job and because of this "little" influence I have created over the past years as a reporter it helped me save a seat and a monthly salary up at this company , which , not kidding, ranks in the top three magazines in India and top 10 worldwide. Not to forget , this magazine has collaborated with the "Stark Oblivion" and because me being "a special friend" of the owner of "SO" , I was treated very "gently" in the office . I needed something to escape and sitting ideally at home after quitting my job, brings back memories from 5 years ago . I couldn't take the sympathy shown towards me , especially by my dad . I had to get out of that house, atlest for few hours to keep my sanity and that's the reason I blindly took this job up.

After wasting 20 minutes and going over the 10 topics listed , to understand the foreign words written on it , I hardly and unsurely choose 2 . That's because my brain ain't braining.

Coming to office after lunch time and getting off with it without having to listen any colorful profanities from my boss made me slightly guilty of my position and influence . They don't have to treat me differently when the others always have to listen "handful" of words from their boss even if they were 1 hour late . And rationalizing this now in my head makes me more guilty and grumpy.

I need to talk with Mrs. Kapoor . Either she treats all of the people same as she treats me or she treats me like the other.

5 freaking years is too much for these things. Enough actually. I glance at the ticking time and the blinking blank word doc. Fuck , work Inaya.

Well, I had chose "Unethical hacking : The mentality" and "History of the classic Bollywood" to write on for this month's issue . Two different topics which I have no idea about. How would an ex- criminal journalist know about Bollywood . Yaa , I have an idea of hacking and all but how would I decipher their mental state , I am not a psychiatrist. I am doomed. Yes , thanks auntie conscience, I know I am fucked.

And can my mind for fuck's sake stop reminding me that I had met my ex-boyfriend 3 hours ago at my favorite place , who I kicked mercilessly ? FUCK , PLEASE.

He looked genuinely hurt when I kicked him but then he went without saying anything . Then Thea had this immense strength to again drag me through the cafe and push me in the car before kicking me into the office and leaving for her own , because I was almost dead after seeing him for two fucking times in the same day . God damn , that mf has some strength in her.

Rishaan

Feels so strange to even say his name in my head . Wow, that's great .
Has he become so unknown to my system that my head feels strange and unknown even to pronounce his name? And there was a time , my system had been in the need of him , to call him, annoy him and most importantly, love him .

I again find myself drown in the man's thoughts , I promise myself never to think of . He and his courtship costed me everything, I needed to be alive .

I unconsciously grab my pendant , that is the only jewellery I would not get rid off . A slender little bottle having few dry rose petals and uncountable memories. The same pendant he had.

"Mother India" calling....

The sharp ringtone of my phone jerked me from my unwavering thoughts.

"Yes , mother India, speak up " I say , as I lean into my chair more , relaxed in the air-conditioned room .

"Had your brunch? " She asks as I hear shuffling from her side . Probably baking something. This woman has slip-disc , high BP, diabetes and insomnia , but no she will have to bake something in this screeching heat standing in the goddamn hot kitchen .

"Had your breakfast and meds ? Went to see the doctor ? " I probe

"I asked your first , Ms. Roy" That tone of sternness.

"Uff , yaa your other precious loving daughter fed me till my oesophagus. " I sigh as I sit straight not being able to see the little protruding belly , half because of the food I ate and half because I didn't hit the gym for a month now .

"Now answer Mrs. Roy , how about you?" I say and drop the pen in the pen stand while it wobbled and fell off the desk . Fuck .

"Yes dear lady, I had my breakfast, medicines and I went for the physiotherapy" I hear the beep of the microwave.

"What are you baking this late in the afternoon standing in the overly heated kitchen ? " I asked and bent down to pick up the pens ,highlighters, etc .

"Carrot brownies " She says and I literally sigh, again because I will be put to test to taste it .
Her obsession of creating things , which the mankind would shudder to imagine .

"Ayien?" I still ask to confirm .

"Karela" Her new found response because she became bored saying "baingan" .

"Mum, what's this hybrid of gajar ka halwa and brownies ?! And please stop with your Instagram, your worse than teenagers these days " I grimace.

And then it continues..... her talking, me interrupting, her giving lectures and me getting excitedly bored .

Life felt simple, after many days , just like that . Just a simple call from mum while I am at work and having a normal conversation suddenly made me feel so light. She's been talking to me on phone after so many years. At home, we continue to be like this but I didn't ever mentioned that I missed her monologues while she's on call with me , her silly complains about her neighbors, my silly questions about life and banters . I missed this so much . I missed us so much .

At the end of the conversation, before she hung up ,I said

"Thanks mum , please keep calling me like this " my voice a little heavy and slightly cracky at the end.

She didn't say anything, but I could hear her smile before the beep of the microwave and the phone.

Why can't life be like this ? Why do I have so many complications? Why do I need to fight my demons alone ? Why can't mum cocoon me in her arms while dad pat my head to sleep?

And soon, I find myself sobbing a little .

What's wrong with me ? I went to use the washroom and only then I realise the cause of this sudden emotions riling up. I am on my periods. Great .

The day had been a rollercoaster. Right from midnight and the last thing I wanted was my uterus tearing up.

I sit at my desk again , googling about hacking and stuffs and within minutes I realise I have to seek professional help for the matter I am writing . I close the tab and search about classic Bollywood but google going nuts showed me results for classical dance in Bollywood. Why can't this little bitch show what I want .

Feeling super irritated , I close all the tabs and sit straight when the pain from my abdomen shot up to my brain . Oh the uterus , I would love to see you not bleed but for that I need give you a baby which I will not.

8

:00 P.M. IST

Yes! Time to clock out for the day . I arrange my bag and leave my room only to see Thea rushing upstairs to my cabin in a "very" bad mood .

5 minutes later when both of us settled down again in my cabin I ask her what was this surprise visit to my office meant .

"Our office system got hacked . That meant our designs got stolen and I have a fucking show to put on in the next week , and my team very unceremoniously told me they were very fucking attentive to the systems and had them updated, protected and shit . Now tell me what the fuck should I do !?" She huffs, eyes tired , sweat prickling down her forehead , face exhausted .

I lower the AC temp and hand her a glass of water .

"Firstly, did you eat anything ? " I ask and pull my phone to call for the canteen to order something.

"Do you think I was even able to breathe after seeing those things? It was month's hardwork, their own , my , all of it wasted within an hour by some fucking petty people just for rivalry? Who ever has done it, they now proudly own the designs my team made , they will get the praise my people deserved , they will flaunt those as their own when my people had given their whole to those pieces. I feel like shit because however I blame them , it was me to approve the security system . I am the one Ina to let them down when my job was to lead them up. I don't even want to know how they are feeling right now, because honestly when this news broke out , the 8 people , the 8 young interns who put their trust in me and me in them, stood still like dead. Those eyes of horror and defeat, it'll haunt me . It was their first show Ina , the one bound to hit the sky and because of this petty rivalry, it's gone? The dream ? Everything? " She chokes , her eyes tearing up . I am seeing her like this after many years and it feels strange.

"You have 1 week left Thea , I know you can create a whole different universe in a week. Trust your creativity, don't break down. Your team needs you. This is the time to show creativity, strong mentality and leadership . Bring them together Tee, pull your team up again to where it belonged , it's your place , no one can ever replace Stark Oblivion. Show them their status , show them that Stark's not only create things , they create "mentality" . They're ready for every circumstances, that The Thea Williams and Stark Oblivion are not a fragile and sophisticated. " I say and Thea looks up at me, star-strucked , well yaa, I am surprised too by the way I went on motivating her . Geez.

"What the fuck is wrong woman ? This level of motivation , that too from a brain-dead person like YOU , is fucking surprising. " Thea says as she stands up from the couch .

"Are you done ? Now sit and plan how you will achieve this , my motivational speech shouldn't be wasted. " I say , nonchalantly while she sits with a thud .

"Yaa, team is working , like they started right when the news broke out, I seriously don't want any media coverage on this. Well, we always have a back up plan ready but that plan needs TOO MUCH alteration, modifications and everything. Fashion sometimes sucks. " she huffs tiredly .

"Okay , then let them work and let's find out who did this , cool?" I say and see she huffs again .

"Ina ? Seriously? Again shit sherlock ? Don't you have work ?" She says and slowly sprawls on the sofa.

"Yes, I need to finish 2 articles for the next month issue, and no I am not doing shit sherlock. But this will help me to write because this month's topic is 'Hacking: The mentality' " I smirk seeing her jolt up straight.

"You are pathetic, taking advantage of my misery . I am so tired and exhausted, almost dead ,and then there's you mf , smirking , huh" She says and I chuckle .

"I'll give the example of Stark Oblivion, to create a buzz, what's say?" I play-around to distract her from the tension lingering in her brain .

"Geez, such an arsehole " She aims a highlighter at me but I dodge it and successfully distract her for a while .

Later that night ,

"We need to contact a professional to investigate this.." I say and Thea sighs m agreeing .

Few minutes later...

"Hello ? Is this Nicholas D'Souza?" I ask and hear a low hmm.....

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Nick and Inaya ? What ?

What happens when these two come together ?

What happens when past collides with present and hampers the future ?

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Author's Note-  Hey guys.... uhmm.. yes .. I know... I... uhm... see ....

*sighs*  throw the chappals at me I won't complain...

But but but,  usse pehele read the chapter , say the assumptions,  and give lovely reviews 💋

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That's it for today guys !

Tab tak ke liye BYE!BYEEE!