I opened my eyes with a gasp. Cool sweat perspired on my forehead, and my ear was throbbing to the point of giving me a massive headache.

"Mary?"

The blood in my veins became cold as ice. With hesitance, I turned my head to the side.

Brown hair, chocolate eyes. Conde.

"Louis?" I said, struggling to sit up in the bed I was laying on. The soldier must have brought me back to my chambers. Where is Francis?

"Please don't move." He reached over me to gently press my shoulder back against the bed. "You are still very ill."

He spoke these words with great sorrow, as if this was his fault, but still, I flinched away from his touch. He was a traitor. He threatened France, Francis, and my crown.

"Ill?" I raised my eyebrows. "Louis, I'm fine, but what are you doing here?" My heart was suddenly thumping rapidly. What if he broke into the castle? What if he hurt Francis?

Tears welled up in my eyes, and I pushed myself as far away from Conde as possible without hurting myself. As I moved, my back groaned with pain, and my headache made me want to throw up.

Louis sighed, nodding his head before he returned to the seat that was positioned next to my bed.

"I'm here as part of the conditions of my surrender," he said.

He averted his eyes away from me as I stared at him with confusion.

"Surrender? You're surrendering?"

I pressed my hand against my throbbing forehead, desperate to ease the pain.

"Yes, I am."

"But, why?" I said, sitting up despite Louis' protests. "You were in a favorable position only this morning. Why surrender now?"

Louis looked up at me with watery eyes.

"You're right, I was in the favorable position," he said. "Francis and your men intercepted Renaude before he breached the castle, per your warning. But my men outnumbered Francis' men. The only thing left was the in-person meeting to discuss his surrender."

My throat closed, and he paused, returning his gaze to me with tears in his eyes.

He continued, "I was expecting Francis, but instead, I got the palace messenger. He claimed that you were injured by my men in the forest. You had caught an ear infection and you wouldn't wake up. He refused to leave your side, which meant he had to refuse our meeting."

I shook my head, which only increased the pain in my head.

"That isn't possible," I said. "One of your men shot me this morning with a bow. I don't have an ear infection, Louis." Hundreds of thoughts ran through my head at once, frustrating me until I wanted to scream. "What you're saying doesn't make any sense! Where's Francis?!"

Louis became reproachful.

"Mary, calm down," he said slowly.

"No, no, no, no! You were going to marry Elizabeth! You betrayed France! You wanted to kill Francis!"

A splitting headache burned my nerves like a scalding iron, and I screamed in pain.

"Guards! Someone, help!" Louis shouted, kneeling by my bedside.

"No, stop it! Get away!" I screamed in insurmountable pain. "Make it stop! Someone make it stop!"

I squeezed my eyes shut and placed my hands over my ears, desperate for peace, desperate to be free from the pain that was ripping through my skull and shredding my ear into tiny chunks of flesh.

My vision dimmed, and I felt a small pinch and warm liquid seep through my veins.

What the—

"You said she was getting better!" Francis' muffled voice said as I drifted in darkness.

I heard a loud sigh.

"Infections take time, Your Majesty," Nostradamus said.

Nostradamus is here?

"She was screaming!" Francis' voice shook with frustration. "There was pain in her voice."

"Hallucinations," Nostradamus muttered.

I heard the jumble of glass and metal clinking against one another.

"She's hallucinating? Surely that's a sign the infection in her ear is worse," Francis worried.

"No, Your Majesty. Nothing is worse. If she is hallucinating, her body is still fighting against the infection, which is good. The herbs should stop the hallucinations, and if we're lucky, the infection."

"If we're lucky," Francis said bitterly. I easily imagined the frown on his face.

"I'd say as of now, you are quite lucky, Your Majesty. It is fortunate that Lord Conde cares so much for your wife. Otherwise, you may not have been lucky enough to trap him into surrender."

"Lord Conde is the reason why my wife is sick!" Francis said darkly. "Of everything he has done, this is the worst. If anything happens to her . . ."

"Yet, you let him see her."

Francis huffed.

"It was Mary's only chance for survival. It wasn't like I could say no."

"But, even if you could, you wouldn't have," Nostradamus said.

"No, I wouldn't have," Francis said. "How could I? He had the troops, he had the resources to take France, but he didn't. For her.

"He knew that if he took France, she would die. He would rather go to jail, be exiled, be executed than let her suffer. I would do the same, so how could I say no when he asked to see her?"

"You couldn't because you know he loves her too," Nostradamus said. "You can never truly hate someone who loves Mary because, like you, they will always protect her. Even when you can't"

"That's where you're wrong. Because I do hate Conde. I hate him more than my father, more than I thought possible," Francis said.

"Because he loves her? Jealousy is a foe, Your Majesty."

"No, I hate him because he's the reason why her life is in danger. He's the reason why she's dying," Francis seethed, slamming his first against something hard enought to make a loud noise.

"Anger won't heal her. Time and medicine will. Patience, Your Majesty. She's still so young. She has much to live for."

Their voices gradually faded until I could no longer hear them.

Conde surrendered? For me? That couldn't be right . . . We hadn't spoken in weeks. Could he really love me, unrequited for so long?

I paused.

But hadn't that been what I was hoping for? For him to still love me enough to allow me to get close to him. Close enough for me to stab him with the dagger and prevent him from taking France.

Maybe I was ill. Maybe I was dying, and it was karma for what I planned to do to Conde. He was still the man that helped me find justice for my rape. He was still the man that comforted me after my miscarriage on the day of John's christening.

He was still a good man. It was I, who unknowingly led him astray.

Guilt ripped away at my soul.

It's not just Conde. It's not one instance gone wrong. It's me: the Queen of France. This will happen any time I look for comfort or happiness. I'll condemn any man who brings it to me. Only a king can survive my love, romantic or platonic.

My rank is poison.

If Conde had never fallen in love with me, a queen, who did not return his sentiments, he wouldn't have been drawn to an army that could overthrow Francis. He wouldn't be condemned because of the love he feels for a queen. For me.

If I was anyone else, he could have walked away unscathed. Instead, he must suffer, not because of who I am, but because of what I am.

A queen.

Francis will make sure he suffers; then, the Vatican will make sure he dies. He will have no peace, no hope of happiness, and it will be because he was foolish enough to love me.

I hated him so much because of what he planned to do to Francis. I justified his death because only one king could survive, and I couldn't live without Francis. I argued that my actions were selfless and in the best interest of France.

And maybe they were in France's best interest. But they were also purely motivated by selfishness. There was never a choice, not really. It was alway Francis.

It has always been Francis.

And now, Conde is condemned for it. Perhaps I deserve to die after all.

The pain in my ear eased, and I allowed myself to sink into the darkness. Similar to after I was raped, I was drowning, but this time I deserved it. I let myself sink further and further, waiting for death to take me or for life to place me in Francis' arms.

AN: I am so sorry for the extra week it took me to update! My life has been crazy with illness, exhaustion, school, bowling...

What did you think of Conde surrendering? Were you surprised?

I wanted to make sure this chapter was good, so I put it off, and I finally finished it! Now, because I love all of you, I am going to explain why Conde surrendered when it seemed like that he would never had done so before.

Right, Conde wrote Mary a love letter because he loves her, and he understands that they can't be together. In previous history (the show), there is an ongoing civil war between Catholics and Protestants. The Vatican (related to the Catholic Church and France is Catholic), wants the entire country to be Catholic with no protestants, so Mary asks Conde, a Catholic with a protestant mother, to pretend he's protestant so other French nobles will admit to being protestant to prevent a bill being passed where essentially everyone has to be Catholic or get punished. Conde does so, which makes him a popular public enemy of the Catholic Church, which is why the Vatican tried to arrest him for false crimes. How does this relate to Conde and Mary and England?

England is PROTESTANT, so the queen, Elizabeth, needs a PROTESTANT husband. Conde is a prince, the brother of a king with a claim to the French throne. He is aware of the discrimination against Protestants in France, and like Mary and Francis, he is against it. But the French monarchy is supported by the French noblemen (many Catholic) and the Vatican (like other Catholic countries), so Francis and Mary are pretty tied up about what they can do. So Conde has a "valid" reason to pursue the claim of the French throne.

This war between Conde/England and Mary/Francis/France is rooted in religious differences from a logical standpoint. England wanted to take over France so it would be Protestant, and as a bonus, they could imprison or execute Mary and gain Scotland to make it Protestant too.

But why does Conde actually agree to marry Elizabeth and take over France? First because the Vatican has decided he needs to be imprisoned/killed for crimes they framed against him, and he has nowhere else to go except for England. Second, England promised Conde that if he became the King of France (and England from marry Elizabeth), he could be with Mary.

So why did he surrender? Seems like he had a good thing going for him, right?

WRONG (in this case particularly).

Francis was too distracted by Mary being unconscious and sick to do anything to thwart Conde, and they didn't have enough resources to prevent a successful invasion anyway. Also, if Conde captured France, would England actually let a sick Mary, Queen of Scots live? That seems unlikely.

If she dies, they get Scotland, which has been nothing but a drain on their resources, and more importantly, they remove the only legitimate threat the Elizabeth's throne. Kill two birds with one stone. After Mary is shot with the arrow, Conde realizes this and decides he would rather die, than watch Mary die.

He never wanted to be a king. He convinced himself that he wanted to be the King Of France because he loved Mary and Mary loved Francis, the King of France. He built this delusion that is he was the King of France, Mary would love him and he would get everything he wanted.

In summary, it wasn't a hard exchange for Conde to surrender and thwart his own invasion if it meant saving Mary's life, and more importantly, seeing her one last time because they don't know if she's going to make it. He definitely blames himself for Mary's condition. Mary's hallucination got that right.

That was crazy long, but there's the explanation if you wanted it! As always, thank you so much for reading this book! It means the world to me! Stay tuned for future updates, and hopefully, I will see you next Sunday!

-Elly6431