Chapter 13.1 - Letting Go - (Lilly)

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The world spun, tilting on its axis as I stumbled forward, lurching from side to side, trying to follow after the ship, when my legs gave out beneath me. I collapsed to the ground, my knees striking the dirt with a dull thud that sent a dull shockwave through my bones. Tears streamed down my face, tracing burning lines around the edges of my eyes, the saltwater stinging and eating away at my eyelids like acid.

"Lilly. Lilly. Hey, Lilly." The voices called out to me, distant and muffled as if underwater.

Alec's face consumed my thoughts, his features contorted in sharp, agonizing pain. That final moment played on repeat, an endless loop of torment.

"I think she's in shock."

I'd journeyed so far, fought so hard, only to lose him again. The cruel irony tore at my heart, shredding it to ribbons.

A hand patted my cheek, the touch gentle but insistent. "Lilly... Hey! Lilly!"

Blinking away the tears, I lifted my gaze to find Kendall crouched before me, his palm resting against my face. "Hey, there ya go girl. Come on. Come on." His voice, low and soothing, coaxed me back from the brink.

Kendall reached down, gripping under my armpits, and hauled me to my feet. My legs trembled, refusing to support my weight, and I sagged against him, clutching at his shoulders for balance.

"He's dead," I whispered.

"He is not dead," Ragger growled. "That was not a fatal wound for a Karagaunt. They took him for some other purpose."

Rage ignited in my mind, the fury chasing away the numbness. They took him? They dared to take my Alec? To kill him was one thing, but to take him, kidnap him? Planting my feet firmly in the dirt, I steadied myself, my hands gripping Kendall's shoulders with renewed strength.

"What purpose?"

Ragger fell silent, his gaze sliding away from mine. Seizing him by his torn ear, I wrenched his head around, forcing him to meet my eyes. He whined, then chuckled, the sound devoid of humor. "You might have the biggest balls in the entire universe, you know that?"

Releasing his ear, I repeated the question, each word sharper than the last. "What fucking purpose?"

"I cannot say with any certainty. Mayhap they seek to twist him into another of their Thralls. The Empress may wish to witness the result of two Destroyers engaged in the Vorhekt. Or she may simply desire to inflict unimaginable agonies upon him until his final breath if she fails to bend him to her will."

My blood ran cold. "What is a Thrall? What is Vorhekt?"

With a weary sigh, Ragger lowered himself to the ground, resting his muzzle between his paws as he panted, his breath coming in ragged gasps. "I am tired," he said.

Shanta stepped forward, her voice soft but clear as she spoke. "He requests I clarify in his stead, as he must rest. A Thrall, he says, is an elite guard, bound to the Empress' will - their obedience ensured not only by the promise of their own annihilation should they rebel, but the eradication of their entire bloodline, from first to last. It would appear the Empress seeks to bring the Karagaunt to heel, rather than exterminate them as before, an endeavor which yielded disastrous consequences."

As she spoke, Ragger's torn ear twitched, the movement slight but unmistakable. I was beginning to think our friendly neighborhood god had a PTSD tic.

"The Vorhekt, or Joining," Shanta continued, "is a ritual in which a Vit melds new genetic material into their host, whether through injection, consumption, or the Vannak, the Cocooning, wherein they merge completely with another Vit and its host, emerging as an entirely new being. The Vit battle to the death within the genetic crucible, only one rising victorious. Through this, they unite with their host, transcending their parasitic nature to become a singular entity. Legends hold this is how the Empress herself rose to power."

"That's all kinds of fucked up," Kendall muttered, his brow furrowed. "So that's what you think, the Empress wants to create something new?"

"A creation she can shackle to her will," Shanta said, her voice barely above a whisper. "A Destroyer unrivaled, subservient to her alone, against which none could stand. In some ways, she already has. In the past, and with Alec, the Destroyer has always been a host that retained their own mind, their own will. Ragger believes that this Destroyer was captured and underwent Vannak, which destroys the mind of the host in the process. It is a pure Vit, loyal to her and her alone. And on my own, part, for reasons unknown, I cannot access their mind."

"Well -" Kendall began

A groan nearby stopped us all in our tracks, the sound a jarring intrusion amidst the eerie silence that had settled over the ruins. Ragger's ears swiveled, the torn one twitching as he tried to pinpoint the source of the noise. His nostrils flared, drawing in the scents that hung heavy in the air - the acrid stench of smoke, the coppery tang of blood, and something else, something alive amidst the devastation.

There was a small scrabbling of rock by one of the crumbled buildings, the sound of debris shifting and tumbling. Ragger sprang into action, his powerful legs propelling him forward as he bounded over the rubble. He wove through the jagged slabs of concrete and twisted metal with a fluid grace that belied his size, his movements those of a predator on the hunt.

He stopped for a moment, his head cocked to the side as he listened intently. It was so easy to forget that he was not a regular dog sometimes, that beneath the facade of fur and flesh lurked an ancient, unfathomable intelligence. With a sudden lunge, he plunged his muzzle into the debris, his jaws latching onto something buried within. He began to tug, his muscles straining as he stepped backward with each pull.

At first, all I could see was a hand, the fingers curled and lifeless. Then, as Ragger continued to drag his prize from the rubble, more of the figure emerged - a shirt sleeve, a shoulder, and finally, a pale, freckled face framed by a mop of red hair.

"Danny?" Kendall and I sprinted over, our hearts pounding as we hovered over the derpy little storyteller's form. He looked so small and fragile lying there, his clothes torn and his skin smudged with dirt and blood.

He blinked several times, his eyes squinting as he tried to clear the dust from them. "Oi... feck me, aye?" he croaked, his voice rough and strained. "Nevah thought I'd see you lot again. The feck happened? Absolute bags, that."

His Irish accent twisted the words, the familiar cadence a welcome respite from the horrors we had witnessed. Generally speaking, most of what Danny said was rambling nonsense, but we'd spent enough time with him to understand what he was getting at.

He wiped his face with a grimy hand, then pushed himself up off the ground, his legs wobbling as he struggled to find his balance. Kendall reached out to steady him, worry in his eyes. We were all very fond of Danny, one could even say he was the founder of our little commune. Hardly a leader, however..

"We were hoping you could tell us what happened," Kendall said, his eyes scanning the little ginger man for any sign of serious injury.

Danny snorted, shaking his head. "Y'all acting the maggot? The place exploded, what do you think happened? I was sitting here, doodling up some new sketches for Danny's Ultimately Awesome Guide to the End of the World, and suddenly there's explosions, fire raining from the sky, and some big hulking brute rushing through town, fecking absolutely everything sideways. Then there was a big boom right outside my door, and yours truly nearly took a dirt nap."

He gestured wildly as he spoke, his hands flailing in the air. Despite the gravity of the situation, I couldn't help but feel a flicker of amusement at his antics. Trust Danny to find humor in the midst of an apocalypse.

"And that hulking monstrosity, I thought it must be the Stalker at first, figured you'd riled him up something awful. But no, this beast was a whole other manner of creature, couldn't bloody believe me eyes..." He trailed off, gaze dropping to his pants. "Ah shite. Think I've gone and soiled meself. Ave... Ave you got any bog roll?"

Kendall seized Danny by the shoulders. "Danny. Focus. I don't care if you shit your pants. We've all shit our pants, Danny, and you more than the rest of us combined. You send us on more toilet paper runs than anyone -"

"Oi, you know I've got the IBS!" Danny whined. "Keep telling you lot to scavenge a bleedin' bidet, but do you listen?"

"I don't care. Danny, right now, everything is fucked. All gone sideways. Look, we found Alec -"

"Oh, hidin' in the trees is he?" Danny craned his neck, peering into the woods behind us.

Kendall hung his head and Danny's expression turned ashen. "Wot, you lost 'im then?"

I lunged forward, shoving my face mere inches from Danny's and glowering until he quailed under the intensity of my glare. "We didn't lose him. That creature you saw, the one you mistook for the Stalker - it's called a Thrall. It took him."

"Wot, with you lot guardin' him? How in the ever-loving hell did you manage that? Thought lover boy was untouchable!" Danny spun away, hands thrown up in exasperation as he began rummaging through the rubble. "Gotta be a clean pair of trousers 'round here somewhere..."

"Danny," I growled, arms crossed as I watched him paw through the debris.

He ignored me, discarding a tattered shirt and grumbling under his breath.

"DANNY."

"WOT."

"I swear to Christ almighty, I will punt you so hard your "arse" will match your "bloody" carrot-top if you don't shut it and SIT DOWN!"

Danny gaped at me, baffled. "And how d'you expect me to park me arse with it full of shite?"

Striding forward, I snatched a fistful of his shirt and flung him backwards. He landed hard on a slab of concrete, eyes bulging in horror as his ass met the unforgiving stone.

"Like that," I snorted.

"It's all up in me bollocks now, look at what you've done!" Danny wailed, squirming atop his perch. He shifted his weight from cheek to cheek, face scrunched in discomfort.

"You absolute tosser! I oughta... I ought... I... I..." His eyes darted between us, comprehension dawning as he registered the cobalt blood splattered across our faces and clothes. Kendall and I must have looked a fright - gore-spattered and wild-eyed with barely-contained fear and rage.

"Well, you lot look like shite yourselves..." Danny mumbled, voice quavering. He swallowed hard, Adam's apple bobbing. "You know... I don't think I've ever seen you two afraid of nuffin'. We must be in deep if you lot are looking like field mice. Oh, we're right fucked, aren't we? I'm sorry... I, uh, I think I might be in a bit of shock. You're right. What's some soiled trousers? Forgive me?"

As he spoke, his eyelids fluttered and he swayed where he sat. Kendall darted forward, snatching a fistful of Danny's collar to steady him. "Easy buddy. Come on, we need to know what happened here. Who was here? Was anyone off scavenging?"

"Always folks off scavvin', mate." Danny's words slurred together.

Hope flared in my chest. "Mathis?"

Danny's brow furrowed as he struggled to focus. "Aye... Yeah, I think he was. 'im and Geela and a few others. Toka... Barana... Adam... Johnny... Couple changelings went out, too..."

Pain etched lines across his face as he met our gazes. "...Irene was here though. I'd just spoken with her moments before. Oh I do hope she's alright. Sweet woman..."

Bile rose in my throat at his words, my gut clenching. Kendall set his jaw. "Alright. We need to go looking for other survivors."

"Wot about the scavvers that'll be coming back here in a few hours?" Danny asked.

"We wait for them."

"That sounds like a right shite idea, it does. And if those Angels come back?"

I clenched my fists, nails biting into my palms. "Then we fight."

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