Squirrelflight:
Hey Brambleclaw
You've gotta be kidding me
You didn't clean out our moss?
Now that's the third time this week

Bramblestar:
I've been a little busy
Hon
I've got a Clan to lead
Besides
Today's your turn
At least
That's what we agreed?

Squirrelflight:
It's always my turn
Apart from when it really counts
Such as last night's Gathering
You told me to shut my mouth

Bramblestar:
Now
That's an exaggeration
You were speaking out of turn
There are some Clan matters that are just not your concern

Squirrelflight:
Of course they're my concern!
I'm your God-dang deputy
And there you go again
You just never take me seriously

Bramblestar:
If I didn't take you seriously
I wouldn't have made you deputy
Even though you're next in line
You can't just go step all over me

Squirrelflight:
Like I owe it all to you
I don't need to take your charity
I saved your scrappy tail a hundred times on that journey

Bramblestar:
Well I didn't have a choice
Seeing as you refused to leave
All you did was hiss and whine and cry and threaten to spill the beans

Squirrelflight:
You're a dang mousebrain if you thought you could up and leave
With just you
Little Crowy
Feathertail and Tawny
Oh please
Take a leap
You're like a paranoid queen
You'd of made it halfway and turned around without me

Bramblestar:
Uh-

Squirrelflight:
Just you wait
I'm so far from being finished
Now listen
Stop your hissin'
Take note of what I'm spittin'
You're demanding
Condescending
Not the least bit understanding
And you wanna know the truth?
I have no clue what I saw in you

Bramblestar:
Woah, woah! What's this even about?

Squirrelflight:
Your absence from my life?
Just thought I'd point it out

Bramblestar:
What do you mean?

Squirrelflight:
Your Clan is important
Sure
But what about me?
Those aren't things you should have to choose between

Bramblestar:
It's not about choosing
I'm just tryna find the time
I can't be everywhere at once
That's why you're by my side

Squirrelflight:
Mm
Speaking of sides
Have you chosen one yet?
You always seem to find time for daddy
Or did you forget?

Bramblestar:
All right
Enough
You can't seem to let that go
I was young and naive
But I can say that I've grown
Unlike someone here
Who still acts like an apprentice
Your saltiness and jealous streak is completely horrendous

Squirrelflight:
Excuse me
Do you know who you're talking to?
Your friend
Your mate
Have you forgotten what we've been through?
Ever since day one it's only been you and me
And not to mention buddy
I'm the mother of your babies

Bramblestar:
There it is!
Squirrelflight dropped the bomb!
How many cats in this Clan get to call you their mom?!

Squirrelflight:
*gasp*

Bramblestar:
Any secrets I should know about?
Or more that you've just let out?
If it's lying you prefer
I can always go ahead and ask Ashfur

Squirrelflight:
And I'll ask Jessy

Bramblestar:
No
Ask your sis about the three
Since you wanna keep the truth from me

Squirrelflight:
Wow
You should know a lot about trusting your siblings
After all
It's my dad your brother planned on killing

Bramblestar:
And what did I do?
I went ahead and took care of it
You had the guts to break our trust
And frankly
You're a hypocrite
First you say you love me then I see you gettin cozy with a straight up psychopath who almost killed our family!

Squirrelflight:
I'll have you know--

Bramblestar:
No
It's my turn to cut you off
You think you're so tough
But you make me sicker than a bout of greencough
I gave you everything I had in me
And all I ever wanted was to hear an apology

Squirrelflight:
Brambleclaw...I'm so sorry.

Bramblestar:
I'm sorry too. But...lets just agree that Leafpool is the cause of like, 90% of our problems.

Bramblestar and Squirrelflight:
*dissing Leafpool*

Leafpool:
UM?! WHAT THE F--

So who won?!
Who's next?!
You decide!