I had suspected something was wrong when Natalie didn't respond to my messages. Now I knew something was wrong when she didn't show up to our school paper meeting.

I'm not gonna lie, I had forgotten about how exhausting it was to deal with Lillian without Natalie as a mediator. However, Tucker turned out to be a big help. He didn't seem to mind at all how much she could talk on and on and on with her stories. She could be talking about one thing one minute and then completely steer the story into something entirely different and Tucker would be there quietly listening to every word, silently nodding or frowning in reaction.

I wonder if Lillian would ever notice how much he seemed to like her. If she would ever stop obsessing over Cyrus, poor old Tucker might actually have a chance.

Michelle was always in the corner, quietly typing away on her part of the paper. She only spoke when she needed to and always minded her business. I decided I liked her. I didn't know her much, but I liked her.

After an entire after-school session of helping out with the paper, I decided it was time to hunt down Natalie. We dropped her off and picked her up at her house for me to know exactly where she lived.

It was Cyrus's week to drive us to school, but he didn't mind helping me out. I told him to stay in the car and he didn't argue much.

I knocked on her front door and waited for a response.

Natalies mom was small Asian woman. She had long black hair and Natalies big brown eyes, though Natalies we're a lot kinder.

"Hi, I'm Rowena. I was just looking for Natalie?"

"Oh, Rowena," she said with recognition. "Yes, you're a new friend of hers from this year." Her voice was neutral, and she looked me up and down with the same expression.

"Yes ma'am," I said, and her mom slowly opened the door for me to walk in.

"Natalie hasn't been feeling good today, dear. She's been cooped up in her room all day."

"Do you think I could see her for a bit? She hasn't answered my texts and I had some questions for her about the school paper."

"Oh, yes I suppose that's fine. Her room is the first door on your left when you get up the stairs."

I let out a quiet thanks before making my way to the stairs. I halted when I heard her mom clear her throat. She dragged her eyes down to my shoes. "You'll drag in the dirt."

"Oh, I'm sorry," I said, quickly kicking off my shoes. She gave me a polite nod and I sent her a small smile before I turned my back and marched up the stairs.

I found the first door on the left and gave it a knock. I stuck my ear on the door, waiting to hear something from the other side. I heard nothing.

"Is she even alive," I muttered to myself. I gave one last knock and waited a little moment later before I turned the knob and opened the door.

Natalie's room matched her energy completely. She had a bookshelf in the corner of her room, right by the window seat decorated with fluffy pillows. She had a work desk on the other wall of her room, her laptop and textbooks stacked neatly on the edge. There was a tapestry hanging over her bed, a design that brought all the colors of her room together. The color the stood out the most of her décor was lavender.

Then there was her bed, which she must have been laying in judging on the Natalie-sized lump in her sheets. She was completely swallowed by her blanket, a steady rise and fall of her breathing visible.

"Natalie?" I asked. She barely even shifted.

"Natalie!" I tried again. She shifted this time, slowly turning over and her eyes peeled open.

"Rowena?" She asked, groggily at first but then her eyes opened more, and she was more alert at seeing me in her room. "What are you doing here?"

"You weren't at school and you haven't answered my texts."

She inhaled a breath and looked around her room. "Oh no," she sat up straighter and dropped her face in her hands. "It's your birthday today."

"That's not why I'm here Nat. I was worried about you. I haven't seen you much since whatever the hell happened at the diner."

The mention of the diner made her eyes go a little wider as if she had just remembered something. She turned her face more towards the window in thought.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'm okay. I'm sorry for worrying you. I think I left my phone on the charger," She shrugged her arm in the general direction of her desk. Sure enough, there was her phone, the screen faced upwards and silently lighting up with a brand-new notification. I looked back at her still facing the window.

"Natalie?" I called softly, waiting for her to turn her face towards me, but she wouldn't.

I started to walk towards the side of her bed, but she sensed my movement and shot out of her covers suddenly. "I actually need to use the bathroom, could you give me a minute?" She didn't wait for an answer before she made her way to walk past me.

Knowing her behavior was very off, I didn't want to give her the chance to leave the room without talking to me first. I reached out and gently gripped her arm before she could get past me. "Listen, we can just-"

I cut myself off as my grip turned her to face me for the first time. Her eyes downcast immediately, not able to look me in the eye any longer. "What the hell is on your face Natalie?" I asked towards the bruise visible on her cheek bone.

(TW: mentions of abuse from this point.)

She looked up at me with small panic in her eyes, but she didn't respond. "Natalie, how long has he been doing this to you?" The urgency in my voice was obvious and I raised my voice without meaning to.

"Shhh, lower your voice, Rowena, please," She used her arms to express her words and the panic in her eyes only grew.

"You haven't told anybody?" I asked in shock.

I reached out and took her arm again, lowering her long sleeve from her arm. There was nothing there, so I took the other one and lowered that. There was a hand shape bruise wrapped around the wrist of her left arm.

I took a deep breath to calm myself, unsuccessfully, but I tried to speak softer this time. "Natalie, I need you to tell me what's been happening. I know you haven't been happy in that relationship for a long time and you've always been private about that part of your life and that's been fine," I said in one breath. "But this," I raised her arm in front of us, "is not fine. This is the time for you to open up to your close friend who cares about you."

She looked at me silently at first and then blinked back tears. She pulled her arm back, holding her bruised wrist with her other hand and rubbing her injury with a single finger, I think as a nervous gesture. She looked back down at the floor before she dropped herself into the cushion of her window seat, still rubbing her bruise.

"I thought-"She started. "For the longest time, I really thought he loved me, Row. He used to be so good to me, he really did. At least in the beginning, he did. But um-"She looked up to blink more tears away. "I think the first time I forgave him for mistreating me, he took it as acceptance, and he got a little too comfortable doing it. He's never..."

She paused to pull at her sleeves and ran them back over her wrists, fiddling with her sleeves in a manner I had seen before. I had seen her do that exact thing before. Thinking back to that time and wondering if she was hiding bruises back then brought tears to my own eyes.

"He would yank me a lot and bruise up my arms, but he's never hit me before. That was just something that happened last night. When he came for me at the diner that night, he was so angry at me. I can't even repeat the things he called me because it makes me feel so awful." She hugged herself and I finally moved to sit down beside her. "We didn't talk for a few days after that."

"Then, last night he wanted to meet up so we could talk about it. I thought he was going to say sorry for how he treated me but he was talking to me like he expected an apology from me. I just felt so exhausted at that point, so tired of making excuses in my head for him. Rowena, I knew it wasn't normal, a part of me always knew that but I just never... I never wanted to accept it because I told myself I loved him, and that he loved me.

"But then I see how Declan always treats you and how happy you make each other, and that's how I want to be loved." I swallowed through the lump in my throat at her words. I didn't say anything though and continued to listen silently.

"So I broke up with him. I ended things last night and he didn't take it well," She said with her eyes darkening at the thought. "After he hit me I think he finally felt bad. So he started apologizing and trying to make it better. I was worried for a moment, I felt like I was hurting him and for just a second I wanted to take it all back. Only I didn't..." I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

She paused in thought and I gave her the tiny moment before she went on. "but I feel so stupid, Rowena," her voice cracked. "I feel so stupid for thinking that he loved me, for not seeing it a lot sooner, I feel so stupid for letting him treat me that way, I feel stupid for second-guessing myself-"

"Hey don't do that," I cut her off and she let out a sob. "Don't think of yourself that way. Natalie, I think you're strong and I think you're so brave for standing up to him like that. You didn't take it back, you broke up with him. You cut ties with someone toxic and that's a lot harder than some people think. You're smart, and you're beautiful, and you are worth so much more than what he made you feel, do you hear me?"

She nodded as the tears fell from her eyes. I pulled her in for a hug and let her cry it out. "Thinking you're stupid is the only stupid thing you've ever done." I told her. "Jesus, if you think you're stupid, I'd hate to know what you think of me."

She laughed at that, sitting upright and I saw her smile through her tears for just a moment. She went back to a serious expression, her nose now pink from crying. "It's going to be okay, Nat. I promise if you give it time, everything will be okay."

"Thank you, Rowena. I wish I had been honest about him since the first time you mentioned it."

"It's okay. It's not easy to talk about, I get that." She gave me a sad smile at that and my phone suddenly vibrated from my pocket.

"What's up?" I greeted Cyrus from the other end of the call.

"Well? Is she okay? You've been in there for a while now." I looked at Natalie and she shook her head, signaling that she didn't want me to say anything.

"Yeah she's fine," I said. "I'll be out in a minute, okay? Can you sit tight for a little while longer?"

"Yeah, no worries. Hey um... tell her to text me back?"

"Will do," I said before ending the call and looked back to Natalie.

"He's really worried about you, ya know?"

She blinked at me. "He is?" she asked softly.

"Yeah, of course he is. He cares about you."

She nodded but she didn't say anything for a while. "I thought he was mad at me."

"No, not mad." Maybe disappointed with the way she still left with Jeremy that night at the diner, after the way he treated her, but I didn't tell her that. I remember when he gave me a ride home ranting about it the whole way. He wasn't mad at her though, I knew he was worried more than anything.

"Just talk to him, okay? You don't have to tell him the whole truth if you're not ready for that. Just let him know you're okay at least. He'd want to hear it from you." She agreed to that with a small smile in consideration.

Before I left, I made sure to place her phone in her hands, switched the sound on, and told her to text me or call me if she needed anything until we saw each other next.

—————————

The rest of my birthday went better than I had expected. I felt a little sad with everything Natalie and I had talked over, but knowing she was finally able to open up to me about everything left me feeling relieved than anything else.

She gave me some film for my polaroid (since Declan had told her what he planned to get me) and some cute jewelry that included rings and a necklace.

Cyrus got me a fucking turtle. A pet turtle and I was already obsessed with him. I decided to name him Michelangelo, after my favorite Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. I'd call him Angelo for short. My parents bought him his tank, which is what the majority of what his charges were for, along with a stash of turtle food.

Uncle Lio sent me happy birthday gif and a visa gift card.

And Adam gave me the contents of whatever he was willing to give away from his backpack. To be more explanatory, this was a pack of gummy bears, two dollars and thirty-seven cents, and a "lucky rock" he picked up on his way inside the school.

I called Declan at night and asked him to meet up with me. He told me he was stuck at home watching his siblings but that I could come over. It was 8:30 on a school night, but I told my parents it was a birthday thing and that I would be with Cyrus, so they said okay.

Declan took me upstairs to his room and we had to talk with lowered voices until we got there since he had just put his siblings to bed.

The first thing I did when he closed the door behind him was hug him, snuggling my face into his chest as his arms circled around me.

"You okay, Row?" He asked me after a while.

"I just need you to know that I really appreciate you. You make me happy and I'm glad you're in my life," I said. I may have felt a little more emotional about him after today, thinking about what Natalie had said about us specifically.

I felt his arms wrap a little tighter around me and he leaned his chin on my head. "You make me feel like one lucky son of bitch." He pulled away just enough to take my face in his hands, making me meet his gaze and his soft smirk. "You know that right?" All I could do was smile at him as he lowered his head and placed a kiss on my forehead.

He pulled me back in and we stayed like that until our legs got tired. "You wanna watch a movie?" I asked him. He hummed in agreement and we cuddled up on his bed as Monsters Inc. played on his screen.

A/N: def one of my longer chapters, if not the longest.
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Also, special ❤️HELLO❤️ to you silent readers out there ;)

ALSO PT. 2, Thank you for 50k reads <3