1 year later

"Wow Eris, I would like to congratulate you to your exhibit. Aba! Kita mo naman after a year may ganyan ka nang ganap."

Natawa na lang ako sa sinabi ni Taylor, ang galing na niya mag-Filipino, may kaunting slang nga lang. Atleast she tried. We are talking through face time, as much as I want them to be here beside me, while we open the event, kaso nagconflict naman sa schedule. Amaya has its another product launching, hindi naman pwede mawala si Taylor doon. She stands as a CEO there while I am here at New York. Awa ng Diyos kinaya naman niya ang trabaho, she is able to expand Amaya to some places in the Philippines and she even managed to make it a number one clothing line. 

Masaya at kuntento na ako sa buhay ko ngayon. Mas matatag na ako sa kabila nang lahat na nangyari.  I am still asking on what if's, like paano kung nagtagal ako sa Pilipinas. Masaya na rin ako sa desisyon ko to settle here, kaso madalang ko makita si Inay, last na uwi ko sa Pilipinas noong pasko, bumalik rin ako sa NYC after a week. 

"Alam mo kinakabahan pa rin ako e, do you think this will be suceesful" Taylor rolled her eyes, I know sobra na siyang nakukulitan sa akin

"Of course it is! Look how big Amaya is? It is because of your creations, kaya yan." Hindi ako kumibo sa sinabi niya, fashion designing is far different from painting. Of course kinakabahan ako, I am not that pro into painting.

"Hay nako, nanibago ka lang, we always stood each others sides when we have opportunity like this. Bakit ka pa kasi lumayas." 

"Because all of you, are my lucky charms."

"Aww, I'm so touched E!" Taylor chuckled. 

"Eris naman, kailan ka ba uuwi. Miss na miss na kita." Napangiti ako nang makita ko si Inay na sumungit kay Taylor.  I already miss her, I wish I can bring her here, her papers were not yet done, lalo kaming nahirapan dahil may record siya sa police. 

"Inay." I said in a pleasing tone. 

"O siya! Oo alam ko anak, huwag kang mag-aalala nandito naman si Taylor para alagaan ako."Aniya, sabay tapik kay Taylor sa braso

"Indeed E! Thanks to your Mama, foods are always delicious." Napangiti ako. I suddenly remember her sinigang. Sobra ko na rin namimiss to, gusto ko na tuloy umuwi ng pinas. If I settle everything here, isusurprise ko sila. 

I sigh, Kung pwede ko nga lang isama si Mama. 

"O siya, we are leaving na. Magshoshopping kami ni Inay using your card of course."

"Taylor!" Pag-awat ko, talagang card ko pa ang gagamitin nila a? Taylor grinned at me, I rolled my eyes as a response. Lagi namang ganun. 

"Sige ingat!"Sabi ko na lang and  Taylor turn off the call. 

Makalipas ng mga ilang buwan nang makaalis ako sa Pilipinas. nakalaya si Inay sa kulungan. Sadly, I was not there para salubungin siya. Sinikap ni Anikka na mapagbigyan ng parol si Inay. SIyempre siya pa ba? Kahit medyo natagalan ay natulungan niyang makalabas si Inay sa loob. 

Si Inay na naging inspirasyon ko para pagbutihin ang lahat ng bagay. Sa kabila ng lahat ng paghihirap niya, gusto ko na mabigyan siya ng magandang buhay, malayo sa mga nararanasan niya. Mahirap ang naging buhay niya. She told me my father has an affair with someone, at naisip ni itay na iwan kami. Dahil wala naman siyang ipangbubuhay sa akin, hindi niya ako nagawang makuha noon. She decided to do dirty jobs, pero hindi rin niya itinuloy. The worst thing is, napagbintangan siya ng isang pinagtratrabahuan niya noon na nagnakaw, which is hindi naman niya ginawa. She was to helpless that time, kaya napasok soya sa loob. 

While I am here, I also did a lot of things. Napagtanto ko na madami pa akong pwedeng magawa sa buhay ko, na hindi pa huli ang lahat to explore regardless of age. Then one day, I tried to paint on a canvas, tapos akalain mo ba naman na  magkakaroon ako ng mga exhibits katulad ng ganito. 

"Ms. Eris we will be having briefing with our presentors."

"Yes, I'll be there in a minute." Sabi ko at sumunod na sa secretary ko. I am so excited for this! Medyo nakakakaba nga lang, still I pray for the success of this event.

"Hi! I am Erisha Magdayo, creator of this exhibit. I am glad that you are here working with us. I expect everyone to do their best here" I smile. " My assistants will tour around here to know your places. Let's do this!" I clapped my hands to signal them to start working. They went to their positions. 

 I took a deep breath. We can do it! I must say, this must be successful dahil what this exhibit gain will proceed to the prison kung saan naggaling kami ni Inay, to help the families of the inmates. I like to send hope to them as that place sent me hope as well. 

The exhibit started, I firmly standing to welcome our guests. There are also some curators who are really experts on this kinakabahan ako. I wish they were here  para lumakas lakas naman loob ko. 

I observe some of the guests, curators looking at my work, kinakabahan ako kapag masyado nilang tinititigan ang mga gawa ko. What will they think? But when I see they smile, I am confident that they are satisifies with my work. 

"Eris." Naplingon ako sa bumati sa akin, I smiled at her. 

"Andromeda Santos?" 

"The one and only." She chuckled, then nagbeso kami. 

"I like to congratulate you, you did great Eris" She gave an amusing smile. 

"Thanks" Napatingin siya sa painting na nasa likuran ko, tinabihan ko siya, habang nakatingin pa rin siya sa gawa ko. 

"Why don't you sell that one? Ang dami nagkainteres diyan bat di mo ibenta?" Umiling ako. 

"I'll like to buy it sana, name your price." She grinned, she seems like in a auction confident to get the bidding item. 

"No, this painting is very special for me."

"Who is behind that painting." Her eyes squinted to the silhouette under the tree. 

  I just recreated one of my painting attempts. The man in a silhouette looking at the stars. Hay, Kamusta na kaya siya? I just know he is doing great with his own company, he is able to expand his business internationally. I'm so happy with him. I am rooting na sana makasalubong kami na dalawa. Sadya ba na itinadhana na hindi kami magkita?

Napangiti ako sa naisip. Marahil tama nga na hindi talaga kami para sa isa't isa. Pero may mga bagay hindi basta-basta na mawawala. He is part of everything I am now, from the start without his love, I won't rise like a flower. 

"Special someone?" Natauhan ako sa sinabi niya, mukhang kanina pa niya ako tinatawag. She grinned, seems she knows the answer. 

With her amazed face. "That special someone hits my curiosity huh?"

"It is better to be secret." I giggled. Eris para kang teenager diyan sa ginawa mo.

"Wow! ok I respect that. I need to leave na." She waved goodbye to me, she's roaming around the museum. Gusto ko sana siya samahan, but she insisted dahil ang lalim ng iniisip ko. 

I took a deep breath of relief, sa wakas natapos na din, seems staisfying to see my view, seems the place like an empty apartment, na kanina punong-puno ng mga paintings. Masaya ako sa success ng event. I never expect this na halos maubos na ang mga gawa ko. Sabi ko kahit mga apat o lima na painting ang mabili, masaya na ako. 

I picked my ringing phone and Taylor's face popped on the screen.

"Eris, how is it?" Sabi niya. Kasama niya si Inay na naghihintay sa sagot ko, they are seems so tense, parang nanonood ng mga horror films. 

I smiled to them  with confidence

"Of course sucess." 

"Yes!" Sabay nilang sigaw.  Tuwang-tuwa na sabi ni Inay, siyempre matutulungan niya ang mga kasama niya sa loob. Actually she is the one who really pushes me to help them. 

"Wait tamang-tama ang niluto kong pinaupuang manok, magcecelebrate tayo. Tignan ko muna." Sabi ni inay at kami na lang ni Taylor ang natira na magkausap sa facetime. 

She squinted her eyes at my back. Of course that painting is still up there. I refuse to sell it, kahit gaano pa kamahal. Money cannot buy anything right? Saka ito na lang ang itinira ko para sa sarili ko. 

"Anong nangyari diyan?"

"Ok, I know it!" Agad niyang dugtog. Dumating si inay sa tabi ni Taylor at napatingin din sa painting na nasa likuran ko. 

"Ikaw talaga anak, hindi mo pa siya nalilimutan no?"

I shrugged, how can I forgot that man who I really love up to this point. Kahit in reality we are not meant to each other. Siguro may pagka-martyr pa rin ako. 

...............................................

Dumaan muna ako sa puntod ng anak ko.  Ilang araw ko na rin siya hindi nadadalaw  dahil sa dami nang  ginagawa. First the Amaya here in New York at sumabay pa sa schedule ang exhibit. Gusto kong maging hands-on sa lahat to my first exhibit. SInce natapos na rin naman, kailangan kong bumawi ng dalaw sa kanya dito. 

Hanggang sa narating ko ang puntod ng anak ko. Nang dumating ako sa New York, lagi ko na siyang binibisita, sa tagal ba naman na hindi ko siya nadalaw,I want to be with her like this staying beside her grave. Kahit na hindi siya nasilayan ang ganda ng mundo, I still want to be a mother to her, kahit na sa ganitong paraan lang na pagdalaw ko sa kanya dito. 

I mutter a little prayer for her, To my little angel, I bet she is happy. Even if I was not able to touch her, kiss her, she will be always in my heart. I put a basket of flower beside her grave. 

You are always in your mommy's heart

Nanlaki ang mata ko nang may nakita akong tulips sa tabi ng puntod ng anak ko.  Agad ko itong dinampot, Kanino naman maaring manggaling ito?