Pain blazing through nudges him to think of arrows and blades - of steel sinking into flesh, of blood searing as it pours out. His eyes open to a vision of a flickering candle - feeble against the wind but holding on nevertheless. For one maddeningly long moment he wonders if it had all been a dream. A dream of another life - of finding her - a dream that he is awaken from too soon, too cruelly back into the reality of a cold throne and a court full of vipers. An excruciating exhale burns its way down his windpipe and he feels disoriented. It would not be the first time his deepest desire had manifested itself into a dream. His heart wrenches painfully, disappointment clawing at him. Their farewells are always unsaid, or burdened with so much that words could not bear. And his breath comes out short and laboured.

A soft hand brushes back his hair, by reflex he catches it, eyes darting and locking with an all too familiar pair of mild brown.

“Soo - yah?” He sounds rusty and the effort of forming words stretches his throat painfully.

There is a wild yearning in his eyes, a look of a man hanging on to a last thread, lost, afraid and a little heart breaking. There is none of the gentle touch of So in his grip sinking into her flesh, but the intense longing of Gwangjong. Some part of him - still disoriented calls her by an old name.

“Soo - yah?”

Ha Jin bends over him, a palm against his cheek, until the heat of her breath washes over him and their foreheads touch.

“I’m here -love,” she says softly. The endearment he often uses slips from her lips effortlessly. His exhale shudders his entire frame, fear swims in his eyes - urgent hands cup her face, lips seeking hers.

“Don’t go -” he mutters against her lips, a sigh, a prayer - too late to be spoken aloud. He thinks it is the poison that had conjured her vision - if it is - he thinks there is a little he could thank Demok for. “Stay - it won’t be long.” His voice rasps and his eyes do not waver.

The ghosts that haunt him are from a time unknown to her, when he had all but lived an isolated life - long long years after her parting. It was only once before she had heard him speak such, and then her uncle’s brew of poison was running through his veins.

“I’m here…”

“They would take you away - they always do.” His feverish words sound resigned. “They took you - you took Seol… how could you even think I wouldn’t - I couldn’t protect her?” His voice breaks and her tears mix up with his trickling down his face. “I had to order her to call me father - once - I wanted to hear it once…”

His words brings back the blurred memory of a soft weight in her arms, little wisps of hair and a very pink face. It breaks her heart all over again to think he died a lonely man - a possible victim to plots of those who shared his blood - and to think how she continue to find new ways to ruin him each time their paths crossed.

“I’m sorry -” her own voice breaks, barely a breath against his ear before she buries herself against his throat where pulse throbs in waves. I was selfish. I was weak. I could have loved a little more - I could have trusted a little more. I could have - and I regretted it every moment…every breath. That she leaves unsaid, instead a harsh breath leaves her lips. “Forgive me - So…”

He stirs at the sound of his name - a hand rests atop hers on his cheek, a touch so gentle that makes her raise her head.

“Ha Jin - ah?” His eyes are clear in the flickering light and he touches his injured shoulder tentatively. “What - where are we?”

“Safe,” she tells him. “For now. It was a flesh wound.” She adds the last part for his benefit watching his grudging fingers probe at the bandages and with an admonishing hand she holds back his. “Don’t.”

Words choke her and she looks away blinking rapidly. Her shoulders hunch with the weight of her own guilt and she barely feels his fingers seeking out hers, gently unfolding her fist.

“Ha Jin - ah?” She struggles to pull her hand free and tears fall unchecked, perturbed So sits up, reaching for her with a wince. His hand on her cheek gently nudges her to face him. “Look - look at me love…”

“I can’t -” her lips tremble. “It hurts! They say you kidnapped me - did you know? Of cause you knew! Why do I always put you in trouble?” Her voice shakes, as the truth sinks in and draws tears that sting in her eyes like acid. “I shouldn’t have come with you. I -” she makes a move to get up, struggling against his hold. “This is why you didn’t want me there - I didn’t know - I was a fool - I should go back right now and tell them -”

“Don’t you dare!” The sharpness of his tone brings her speech rattling into an abrupt halt. Ha Jin looks at him, her eyes wide. “Don’t you dare return to that hell for my sake. What do you think they will do if you go back?”

His words are followed by a pained silence and she inhales slowly.

“Isn’t that why they are doing all this?” She asks, in a small voice. “Mun Seong told me - it has something to do with grandfather Hae’s last will.”

She remains limp as he draws her into an embrace, his lips gracing her temple. She squeezes her eyes shut and presses her forehead against his uninjured shoulder. The warmth of his skin sizzles against the ice draining down her face.

“Ha Jin - ah...” he calls her mild but in vain. “Ha Jin - love, please don’t do this!”

“Look at what I’ve done to you…” she mumbles, as he rocks them back and forth slowly. Her hands come up and ghost over his back, barely touching the edges of his bandage, drawing him closer involuntarily. “They are discussing a ban, I’ve ruined you - I - how could you love me still?” she seeks his eyes, with a terrified look of her own. “We could end this - you shouldn’t seek me out anymore. I bring nothing but trouble.”

“It was my mother who tried to kill you -” So says flatly. “My brothers who in turn put you through so much - are you sure Ha Jin - ah, it is you who bring trouble?”

“So -”

“You talk about what you’ve done to me -” He continues unfettered, his eyes burning. “Have you seen what I’ve done to you?” His hands slide over her arms, over the scars hidden underneath a layer of fabric. “Do you even remember how cheerful you used to be? Like a pulsing light - this - this is what I’ve done to you!”

“So -” she holds him when he moves to get up.

“If anyone needs to walk away that is me - that’s what I tried to do! That’s why I didn’t want you there. You see it now don’t you?” He comes closer, stares into her eyes. “I saw it in your eyes earlier, you see how damaged I am now don’t you? You don’t like to see me like this right? But this is what I am - this is how I survived. I will have this darkness inside me forever - I won’t forget, I - I can’t forget. I will always remember how I failed to protect you, protect myself - then and again - each of those screams, yours and mine. I’ve tried to bury it down - tried to find better ways. I wouldn’t mind them beating me, hurting me, killing me - but for the love of God, I’ll do something terrible if they touch you again!”

He draws in a breath, that shudders its way down to his lungs which burn with the said and unsaid. In his eyes she can see the monsters stirring awake, the man he once was - of iron and blood, the terrible weapon he was forged into before asking him to find peace.

Instead of fear, it draws her in. Finally, she starts to understand why he keeps secrets and why it bothered her so much. Once a secret pulled them apart, the distance took thousand years to cross. But now that they were here - together once more it would take much more than old mistakes to chase her away. So does not want to hurt, So finds no joy in what he can do. He is never a monster, but a wolf forced to hunt. Somewhere deep inside him, he might still think it would repel her. Once upon a time it might have. But thousand years since had changed something fundamental inside her. Instead she steps closer, a cold palm pressed against his heart, the other cupping his cheek bringing him down to share her breath.

“You don’t scare me…” she mutters, holding his gaze, meaning each of the words she utters. “Not then, not now - never. In the end you care so much and you never stop, not even when they hurt you again and again. You care so much that you think it’s bad to hurt them in return.”

She buries her ears in his heartbeat and listens to it slowly evening out, his hands on her flesh are gentle yet commanding. “I’ll not have you without the darkness that hides within you - I’d rather drown in your shadows. You owe me nothing. We both have our share of demons.”

“Say you won’t go -” He insists, still feverish, still holding her close, face cupped in his hands, fingers stroking her throat. “Please…”

She replies instead with a kiss on his lips, a brief salty touch that leaves his heart aching. Instead her fingers trail over his injury and she peers into his eyes.

“Who was it?” Her voice is curt edged with frost.

“Wook.” He keeps it simple. “The Haes are helping him - more than they should. And it seems he is returning the favor.”

“Why are they together in the first place?” Ha Jin wonders aloud. “It’s not like uncle Hae to share his fortune with anyone - but as much as he wanted me home, he wanted our marriage to happen.”

It occurs to them at the same time as their thoughts turn to the little information Jung brought home from his escapade with an injured Yo. Attorney Yoo had given birth to Wook - could it be possible that…

“If Hong Ha Jin was the father - why would he attach himself to Assemblyman Hwang?” Ha Jin muses, brows frowned. It seems unlikely that her uncle would spare so much of loyalty for anyone other than his kin - his blood, but then again…

“He would - if it is Omoni taking the calls. She would never want it all to be traced back to her. Even if we found everything Haes did for her - she could easily say it was Aboji who ordered it all.”

The truth settles heavy on her conscious of how perfectly the trap has been set, and how foolishly they had all walked into it. But So does not let her dwell on it for longer.

“What is this place?” He asks again, looking around at the bare walls and unfurnished room around them.

“You said you wanted to go to Miss Oh’s,” she replies a tint of darkness colouring her tone as she recalls how badly he had been injured. “But Jung and I decided they would have her watched. Why did you want to come here - anyway?”

“Hae Jun - does the name sound familiar to you?”

“No -”

“It was in the encrypted records, I have a doubt that it is the real name of Omoni’s other son.” So frowns trying to concentrate over the dull ache on his shoulder. “His first school record is here -”

“Is that how they are going to involve Miss Oh? Say it was she who kept the boy here? My uncle used to live around here too. We are near - by, this is where I used to live when I was younger. Omma and I came here after Appa’s death - she wanted to get back in to the family. My uncle wasn’t an easy one to reconcile with.”

“Who lives here now?” There is a crease between his brows as So asks her.

“Oh nobody does, we closed the house when I went to live with uncle - after her death. I don’t think he ever forgave her…Though he took me in, he never allowed her in the family graveyard…” her voice trails off and a sheen of tears makes her eyes shimmer in the candle light. So reaches for her again, his hand squeezing her shoulder.

He feels the moment the thought takes a grip of her, and her eyes pop up to meet his.

“The urn…” she speaks so softly that So has to move closer to hear her. He could see her pulse beat against her skin in equal parts of excitement and fear - or perhaps the thrill of realization. “The urn of my mother’s remains are kept in a Columbarium. I think Yeon Hwa’s number is its niche number.”

Her fingers curl around So’s wrist, her eyes wide in speculation.

“Why did she want to point you towards my Omma?”