Ch24

Brooks walked back into Claire's bedroom in a daze. Anna was still at her post, watching over Claire from the bedside. He'd grown closer to Anna over the past several days and even though he'd tried to talk himself out of it, there was just no denying the fact he was attracted to her. Anna was everything he never knew he wanted. Smart, centered, down-to-earth, so unlike the Hollywood bimbo that normally adorned his arm. But what would she want with a guy like him? As hard as it was for him to believe, she seemed somewhat interested, too. Brooks wanted more than anything to prove he was no longer the way he used to be. He longed for her to take him seriously and not assume he was still the devious playboy everyone accused him of. Of course, he'd been that way, once upon a time, but that was all in the past. And she actually believed him when he'd confessed that to her! And she hadn't made him feel shameful, instead, she encouraged his attempts. 

What would she say now? Brianna Walters. Pregnant. Could he actually be the father of her baby? No way was he ready to be a father, he could barely take care of himself! Brooks quietly sunk back into the chair he'd been sitting in and continued to watch the scene in front of him. He'd always thought he'd been in love with Claire, but now he knew he hadn't been. Sure, Claire was beautiful. She was sweet and nurturing and amazing, but he hadn't been in love with her. He was in love with the idea of her. Why had he fought it for so long? Why had he relentlessly pursued females who were completely opposite of what he actually craved? Because of his image? God, he made himself sick! 

If there was some way to make this right, he would do it. If he was actually the father of Brianna's baby, he would step up and be the best father he could be. Every child deserved to grow up with loving, stable parents. He knew he wasn't strong enough right now, but he would learn to be. He had to. No baby of his was going to go fatherless. He would do the right thing and marry Brianna, too. Even if he didn't love her, he would do his best to make things right. He wanted his child to be proud of him. He needed them to be. He could do this, he would do this. He would make this work. 

His eyes traveled back over to Anna, and she caught his gaze, lifting the corner of her mouth in a small smile. Brooks smiled back, but he felt empty inside. No. He wouldn't think about what could have been, it was too late for that. Finally, his selfish, irresponsible actions had caught up with him, it was bound to happen sooner or later.

I'm going to make this right. Even if Brianna isn't the woman of my dreams, I need to do this for the—

Suddenly, his thoughts were interrupted by an alarm on his phone, alerting him to a new text message. His heart dropped, not wanting to know who it was. What if it was more bad news? What if it was Jonathon Walters looking for his head on a silver platter?

Anna eyed him suspiciously. He had to check the message. With a hard swallow, Brooks lifted the phone from the pocket of his button-down shirt, trying to convince himself to look at the screen. He'd just take a quick peek and then tuck the phone away. Maybe he should just get rid of his phone? It never seemed to bring him any good news anyway.

With a heavy heart, Brooks glanced at the name. Oliver McGee. What the hell does he want?

Quickly, he pulled up the text, letting his eyes scan over the message.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

"Martin," Ashton began timidly, stepping out of her comfort zone for the first time ages. She cradled the phone between her ear and her shoulder and contemplated what to say next. She never had been very good at saying sorry, but somehow she knew she had to try, even if it did make her feel like throwing up her breakfast. Martin was a good guy, and a good friend. She may not be interested in a romantic relationship with him, but she did value his friendship, and she didn't want to lose that. "I owe you an apology . . . and an explanation."

"It's okay, Ashton. You really don't need to apologize."

"Yes, I do," she disagreed. "I've been dishonest with you. I shouldn't have lead you on the way I did. You're a great guy, and you didn't deserve to be treated that way."

"Ashton, we weren't exclusive. We never said we wouldn't see other people. If we had, this would be another story, but we hadn't gotten to that point. Not that I didn't want to . . ." he admitted, his voice trailing off quietly.

Ashton let out a deep sigh, and ran her free hand through red curls. This was just like Martin, letting her off the hook so she didn't feel bad. He wasn't going to make her beg or plead for his forgiveness, he was just going to give it to her. Nope, she couldn't let him do this. She had used him and now she needed to pay the price. All her life she'd managed to get off Scot-free, whatever her crime. No one ever held her accountable for her actions, and look where it had gotten her. She was nothing more than an over-grown, spoiled Hollywood brat.

"No, Martin, I need to say this." Ashton took a deep breath and plunged forward. "I used your friendship for my own benefit and I am so very sorry. I knew you were interested in me and I played upon your emotions to cover up how I really felt inside." Ashton felt her stomach tighten with anxiety. Apologizing was so difficult! How did people do this?

"Are you in love with her?" he asked quietly.

God, she felt absolutely sick! Her insides stirred violently as a swarm of butterflies made their way into her stomach. Was this what it was like to feel nervous? It was a sensation she was unfamiliar with. Ashton was normally in complete control of her emotions and opening up like this made her feel utterly vulnerable. The only situation in her life that had ever made her feel uncomfortable was the relationship she'd had with her mother, but even that was different than this. She'd smartened up to her mother's ways years ago. "I don't know," she admitted softly. "I mean, I do love her, she's my best friend, but—"

"But are you in love with her?"

Was she in love with Juliana Santiago? It was a question she had asked more than once. It was so hard to admit, even to just herself. Admitting that she'd fallen in love would just leave her feeling exposed. Raw. It would take away control over the situation. It would mean she was living for someone else and not just herself. It would open her up to scrutiny. It would make her weak.

"Yes," she finally conceded. Ashton took a deep breath and slowly let it release. The truth was out in the open, there was no going back now.

"Then, you need to tell her," Martin said, new enthusiasm filling his tone. "She needs to know how you feel."

Martin's sudden burst of optimism took her by surprise. Ashton wasn't prepared for a pep talk, she figured the conversation would go south from here. "I'm not sure I can tell her. What if she refuses me? I don't want to get hurt." Why had she just said that? She needed to stop talking, she was only sinking deeper into a pit of defenselessness! How in the world was she going to crawl her way out?

"Do you really think she'll refuse you?" he asked. "I saw the look on her face the other day when she came to your house. She hated that I was there, she was sizing me up like a panther sizes up a white-tailed deer. Ashton, Juliana is in love with you. It was written all over her face. You really need to talk to her, you're wasting so much time being prideful."

Ashton's pulse began to pick up the pace. "Do you really think so, Martin?"

"I know so," he said, the smile evident in his voice. "You are one of my best friends. I wouldn't lie to you."

Best friends? She hadn't seen this twist coming, but it sure did feel nice. She felt such a connection with Martin, and even if it wasn't romantic, it was real. They clicked. He understood her in a way many people did not. The tight knot in her stomach slowly began to unravel.

"You're too good to me, Martin. I'm not sure I deserve you."

Martin released a hearty chuckle. "Remember that when your company starts filming the next movie! I am currently an out-of-work actor, waiting for his next big break."

Ashton joined in his laughter, "You got it, friend. Thanks again, Martin, for everything," she added fondly.

"You bet. I'll talk to you soon."

Ashton hung up with a renewed sense of purpose. She was going to tell Juliana she was in love with her, even if it meant she could possibly get hurt. She was just about to place the call when her phone alerted her to a text. She glanced down and read the name.

Oliver McGee. Ashton let out a surprised huff, as her eyes studied the message.  Now there's a blast from the past.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

Juliana was getting nervous. She hadn't heard from Ashton since she'd shown up at her house, unannounced. Ashton had asked her to leave and she'd done so, with her tail between her legs just like a sulking dog.

All her worst fears were coming true. It was painfully obvious the photographs had pushed her friend over the edge. She knew how desperate Ashton was to keep their affair a secret, even their very best friends hadn't known. And now it was thrust out in the open for everyone to see. Ashton was a control freak, and that stupid magazine had taken away any control she might have had. She wouldn't be surprised if Ashton never wanted to speak with her again! Not that this mess had been her fault, but she had a  sinking feeling Ashton would want to end their relationship, and ending that would also mean ending their friendship. There was no way it could survive this.

It's not fair! This is not how it was supposed to work out! God, why did Ashton have to be so bull-headed? Never in her life had she met someone as stubborn as her best friend.

Juliana flopped onto her bed and covered her face with the pillow, pressing it tightly to her mouth and releasing a loud scream. A relationship with Ashton wouldn't have worked out, anyway. Her friend was difficult. She was high maintenance. She was impassioned and intense. She was demanding. She was spirited. She was loyal beyond belief and extremely generous when she thought no one was looking. She was the most amazing person Juliana had ever met, or would ever meet, in her entire life.

Maybe I should call her?

Nope. She promised herself she wouldn't do that. Ashton had asked her to leave. She'd kicked her out of her house! She wanted to be alone, and if and when she was ready to talk, the ball was in her quart. Juliana turned her head and stared at her cell sitting on the night-stand, willing it to ring. As if on cue, the phone chirped, indicating a new text.  She sat straight up and reached toward it, searching frantically for the contact name, praying it would be Ashton.

Oliver McGee, she read, disappointment racing through her. Juliana sighed deeply as she opened the text.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

I don't want to go to a stupid meeting with all those pigs if it means I can't play my role!

Her father had promised she would get to be a part of it, but not at all in the way she'd wanted. Not in the way she had dreamed of for so long. Damn him and his stubborn ways! Why was he so intent on ruining her life? If one of her sisters had wanted to become an actress he would have moved heaven and earth to make it happen.

It's because they're beautiful. They are so much prettier than i am . . . Why do I have to look like him? Why couldn't I look like my mother?

Natalie McGee stared at her refection in the mirror, a feeling of distaste washing over her. Beady black eyes, a pointy nose, sharp chin. Dull red hair. It wasn't fair. Why were her sisters so beautiful? Why did she have to be the ugly duckling? It was painfully clear she would never have a boyfriend. Who would want to look at that face every single day? How could a guy ever like her if she couldn't even like herself?

Natalie reached into the messenger bag that lay on her bed and carefully pulled out the pictures. One by one she leafed through the glossy images, staring at the beautiful face that looked back at her. 

Brooks Kennedy. Once-upon-a-time, she had wanted to be with him. But it turned out he was just like everyone else. The final day filming Paradise Cove, she'd stepped out of her shell and asked him out, the thought of never seeing him again filling her with desperation. For a brief moment, he'd smiled back at her and she thought he was going to say yes, but he hadn't. Instead, he'd said no. He refused her, plying her with excuses about maintaining a professional relationship, especially given who her father was. Natalie couldn't believe it, and it was all her father's fault. Not only had he put the breaks on her budding career, he'd kept her away from the only man she had ever loved.

How would it feel to see Brooks again? To see them all again? With their perfect faces and successful careers. And here she was, just as homely as ever. Fired from a position that kept her in the loop. Working behind the scenes on the television drama wasn't exactly her idea of a dream job, but at least it had still been in show business. But no, she'd been let go. Refused once again. 

But not everyone refused her. In fact, the public was loving her right now, they just didn't realize it. Natalie McGee had single-handedly brought some of the world's most famous celebrities to their knees. She'd exposed their secrets, she'd discovered their lies. She'd done that. All by herself. And she had excelled.

Carefully, she opened her bag and moved aside the handgun, placing the pictures back in their spot.

Was she actually going to go to the meeting? What choice did she have? Her father had requested her presence, and even though she loathed him, she could never deny him. But she was not the same girl she used to be. She was no one's doormat. If push came to shove, she'd just admit what she'd done. It might actually be fun. Let the Fabulous Five see how powerful she could be. She was her own woman, successful in her own right. They'd ruined her life once, they were not going to ruin it again.

Everyone would just have to see things her way.

Someone from the past reappears in Ashton's life, find out who in Chapter 25!

Hello, and thank you for reading Fast Lane! If you liked this chapter I ask that you please leave a vote/comment.

As many of you know, my story Strawberry Wine was chosen as the winner of The Write Affair writing contest and will be published in both print and eBook! I couldn't have done this without you, but I need your support now more than ever. Check out my website DarlyJamison.com, or look me up on Twitter or Facebook. Thank YOU for helping make this dream a reality! 

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(Chapter 24 approx. 2, 700 words)