40. Confessions

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Nicholas was sipping red on his bed to avoid seeing his mother. She was out of control. The once sweet house had lost its glamour. To him, it looked more like a butcher shop. On the inside, it looked decent and cozy. It was perfect for any weary traveler or child but he could always hear what was going down below. Grizelda had built a whole other floor below where she kept her victims. Their screams and pleads were numbed by his years of hearing them. He couldn't do anything about it, and it was horrible. They followed him wherever he went along with the guilt. They followed him in his travels and even more importantly his dreams. His dreams were his one channel of peace. They were the place where he could show weakness and cry and scream at his mother. In his dreams, he could defend others and make a difference. In his dreams, he could access memories lost by time and torture and see the image of the mother he was fighting for. Now his ability to dream was being crushed by the horrors around him as they became nothing more than nightmares to further hurt him in his sleep.

Nicholas's solution was to avoid sleep but that of course meant there was no escape. Not only did he hear the screams but Grizelda's excitement. She took pleasure in not only their fear but their pain and viewed it as playing the role assigned to her. She had become a sadist and in her mind, she was only obeying the gods and being the best villain she could be. She made Adiscordia's efforts look like child's play.

He placed his head against the pillow to drown out the noise. He hoped that her sending the curse home would work. He prayed to the gods that it would restore her to the inner beauty that she once had. It was a devotion to being good that now seemed like a myth to him. He wondered if it ever really existed within her, but at the very least he could cling to hope.

He closed his eyes imagining me. He left late on purpose, hoping to keep his promise. I wouldn't last long, so he wanted to give me my biggest desire before I died. Of course, Hans would be angered and he was hoping he would send me out. He hoped I'd get to see them one more time. From what he remembered and was told Hansel was smart, and Adiscordia was back there. I'd be warned and I'd be able to run away. He didn't outright tell me, but he couldn't stand lying to me any longer. He wondered if Grizelda could tell. With his dimming hope, he wasn't sure if he could take many more punishments or lessons from her. A loud creak from below interrupted his thoughts. He slowly pulled the pillow away, the cries had stopped. Grizelda had left the room and closed the door below. Loud steps were coming forward, he knew what this was about. He took what courage he had and stood up, leaving his glass on the night table. He had to think of an excuse.

"Nicholas!" Grizelda bellowed. Adiscordia had seen me, which meant I knew. Adiscordia may have been the most dormant patient sister she had, but she was loyal. She had listened to the conversation that had happened and reported right back to Grizelda. Grizelda didn't care if I knew what was coming or not, I couldn't escape her. What she did care about was that Nicholas's love charade had been revealed and my heart had been weakened because of it. The whole point of waiting was to strengthen my heart so that it could withstand the wish of visiting the gods. It could have been an accident, or it could have been a failed attempt at him letting me escape. The door opened as she stared down at him.

His courage immediately left him. "Grizelda." He wanted to sound confident and rebellious but instead sounded meek and fearful. He had sworn he'd stand up to her every time, and every time she would grow more terrifying. The curse had consumed her, and she had done nothing to stop it. The vessel was breaking and only the curse was keeping her alive. Despite the agony and complete loss of feeling as body parts were torn from her she still showed no interest in stopping it. He wondered if she felt it. She didn't look human anymore, at all, and it didn't faze her. Her voice was drowned out by pillars of razor-stone teeth that created a tunnel past her lips. She had to bend over to look, her eyes pushed apart slightly in their malformed sockets as shards grew in between them. He avoided her but inevitably saw her every day, and every day he would cower in fear.

She could feel his hope for her recovery, his want for me to visit, his desire for me to know. She didn't waste any time. "Useless!" A heavy slap rang across his face. Her claws got stuck in his flesh for only a moment, but it was enough to keep him from falling to the ground. Her hands gripped his shoulders tightly lifting him into her field of view. She forced him to look at her. "If I wanted the heart to be weakened, I wouldn't have waited." She growled.

Nicholas winced with quick panicked breaths. He didn't think of that completely. He had hurt me, not only that but had put all his efforts to waste. He closed his eyes tightly used to the pain before looking for and at Grizelda's own. He had pretended to be Carter this entire time. Perhaps he could pretend to be stronger than he was. "I wanted to give her a final wish before I took her heart." He didn't hesitate. "It was to visit those she loved, I felt that strengthening that bond would help strengthen her. Don't fear her knowing my betrayal, there are still two of them. It's made their love stronger for each other, and that bond will only grow in these trials. Together they'll train to be stronger against us and that bond and strength will give us a backup plan in case the one heart is not enough." Grizelda watched him without reaction, slowly letting him go. As furious as she was he had a point and had spoken with confidence, even though she saw through his act, at least he tried. "I've seen Gree's love, it's awfully powerful on its own." Nicholas felt his feet touch the floor and he went to a frequently used washcloth and a bowl of water to start cleaning his wounds.

"You had me do it, to show love and strengthen the heart. Grizelda, you don't know love. You aren't capable of it anymore. Despite the betrayal, I'll get that love back, believe me. You know the worst of humanity, and I know Gree, she's the best of it."

Grizelda's lips stretched out in an attempt at a smile. That surprised Nicholas, he hadn't seen her smile since this began. "Before I took her heart" she quoted. "You said it without hesitation that time. Now you're talking like a grown man Nicholas." He held his arm that I had healed, as a reminder. "I disagree with your methods, but it does seem like you thought about it well. So I won't punish you. You're right, that's why I sent you. I don't believe in love, so I can't play the part."

Nicholas was surprised at her calmness. All she understood was that he had weakened her ticket to the gods that she had been suffering and waiting thirteen years for. "You aren't going to fly into a bloody rage?"

At this Grizelda snickered. "As I said, you're talking like an adult, I'll do the same. You cowered once, didn't hesitate, and thought things through. You came to terms with the fact that she'll be dying and you're the one to kill her. I never was going to torture her. That piglet is less than meat to me. She's an object, a ticket to a better life. Hating an object is a waste of time. I said I wouldn't punish you, but that doesn't mean that I won't take action regarding this." With that, she turned to leave.

Nicholas took a minute to process what she was saying. "Grizelda, what will you do?" She didn't acknowledge him. His knowing would ruin it all. The truth was, I was powerful, and Hans was powerful. Six days was a short period, but she knew I'd fight back. She was ready but had to be certain. There wasn't time for pride or underestimating her enemy, this was her one opportunity. With the risk Nicholas had taken, she was going to have to give it all she had. It was time for her debut as what the gods had made her be.

Hans had soon returned to his less expressive state after we went home. Hansel had explained it to him, and now the reason why my heart was suffering was obvious. It was a classic case of heartbreak. I was losing hope and with my emotions being the source of my power this was dangerous. He had to be gentle with me. He decided to stay home with me for the next six days, and since he was so sensitive to my usual overabundance of emotion, my current numbness was unsettling. His automatic instinct was to angrily yell at me to snap out of it and start crying again. He didn't. He was trying his best, I could tell. It helped.

Meanwhile, I laid in bed not wanting to move. I didn't want to speak or think. My best friend was a lie, and there was no hope. I couldn't defeat Grizelda, the concept wasn't even something I could imagine. In just six days the world as I knew it was going to be gone because of my weakness. Everyone would suffer or disappear or something horrible, all because I couldn't be enough. Even if I had some great power, how would I learn to train it in six days? What a great heroine I'd turned out to be...

"Gree, I understand that you're hurt but we need to talk about this." He started as he sat next to me on my bed. I didn't respond. He grunted in annoyance huffing away from me before going back to face me. "I'm not mad anymore, but we need to do something about this. We have six days until Nicholas comes and tries to take your heart." I pushed my face onto my pillow to ignore him. "Gree, as annoying you usually are, this is truly disturbing. Please say something."

I growled as I felt my hoofs tense against the bed. I wanted to appreciate that he was trying but I couldn't. I just wanted to be left alone. I wanted to lay in this bed and have Nicholas come to destroy me on this bed. "Let him take my heart." Hans was taken aback, I could feel him shift in shock at this.

"You can't give up." I could almost sense a little fear in his voice. I didn't answer. Sure, I wasn't supposed to give up. In all my storybooks heroes usually had that moment of doubts and trials before bouncing back into encouragement and their final battle but this wasn't a storybook. This was real. "I'm not letting you give up Gree, now get up." I refused, remaining in place. Hans took a deep breath before grabbing his face. "Do you think this news doesn't affect me either? What are six days to defeat a curse?" At this, I looked up at him.

"Nothing. Six days is nothing. Everyone is going to die, and I don't want to think about it. It'll be my fault and the last thing I need is another emotional crisis to destroy what's left of my heart. So if you'd let me grieve in peace and silence I'd appreciate it." Hansel huffed at my ability to be so numb and still so dramatic.

"You're right. Everyone is going to die and our lives were always completely useless. The gods were stupid for creating a pair of weak piglets to save everyone. They could have created a fierce lion or graceful gazelle or something, but there's no hope. So we may as well kill ourselves so at least they can't get our hearts." Hans rambled.

I turned at this completely facing him. "I thought about that. You know that's not how wishing hearts work..."

Hans smiled down at me. "Gree, you're a complete idiot." I barely reacted to this. "Do you even realize you're letting her win by just giving up? You may as well serve yourself on a silver platter." I glared at him. "You're the epitome of love, and now you're letting yourself be filled with guilt and self-hate over something that hasn't even happened yet?"

I sprung up at this. I didn't want to feel anymore! I wanted him to just stop! "What do you want me to do? There is nothing left to do, I can't win this fight!"

"Why not?" Was Hans's immediate answer.

I barely knew how to respond. It took me a few minutes to get my voice back from such a stupid question. "Have you been hearing anything about Grizelda? She eats children for a living! Her sister is taking over Gretel after she was killed! She has had the whole village moving away and in terror for years! She is consumed by a curse that has tortured our world for generations. The curse is immortal! Now I, of all creatures, am supposed to make it disappear somehow in six days?"

Hans nodded. "and you just forced her cursed sister to sleep, multiple times." I blinked a few times trying to process that. I did put the curse to sleep for a bit. "and apparently, you can create things, like truffles?" Okay, I had the power of creation but there was only so much I could do with that. "you can heal others, like Carter for example." My lips parted in defense but I wasn't allowed to speak. "I know you wouldn't let him suffer."

I stared at him. "I'm your naïve useless sister that can't take care of herself."

Hans nodded again with a smirk on his face. "Yes, you are. You're extremely naïve and stupid. I don't know if you're useless, I'm not sure if I could work if you didn't cook for me, and as much as I hate to admit this you cook well." My face softened at this. "and now you have the power of the gods? I had to admit I didn't see that coming."

My face scrunched up in complete confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"The gods created all of us. You have the power of creation."

I stared into the distance trying to process what my brother was implying. The only thing I had made was a plate of truffles! I had wished that into existence. "I'm a wishing heart, wishing for things into creation is what we do."

Hans smiled in a way that hinted that he wanted to slap me. I had offended him. He threw himself on the bed. He still smiled and stared at me. "I can only create what others wish for. On my own, past speed, strength, and smarts I'm pretty useless. I can't even love properly, but your power is limited by your imagination. You love and feel more than anyone I've ever known." He took another deep breath, if anyone can beat Grizelda it's you. Who else?" He turned to me. I wasn't sure if I had ever had a conversation with Hans like this. He looked so sure of himself and confident in my abilities. He was relaxed and it dared me to hope again.

"You?" I admitted sheepishly. "Us, together?"

Hans grinned and sat back up. "Yes, us together." My body relaxed at this as I felt my emotions flow back in along with the comfort he had given me.

I wrapped my arms around him tightly. "I'm still scared."

Hans sighed and held me close. "I know, and just maybe, I'm scared too. Six days isn't a lot to think of a plan for something like this, but with a power like yours I know we have a chance."

My body froze at this. Six days? We didn't have six days! "Carter is coming at noon," I stated ready for Hans's explosion of rage.

Hans pushed me away immediately and I fell back on the bed again. Hans raced up the ladder to the door and looked up at the sky. "We have an hour at most." He grabbed his whistle and a couple of knives that he shoved inside his boots as he spoke to me. "Gree, I need you to act like you don't know. I know you're hurting but I need you to act as your over-emotional innocent self again. If he knows that we know then he might not even wait until our birthday! I struggled to give a verbal reaction but I nodded. I was feeling emotion already, and right now I felt debilitating fear. This was going to be difficult. "See if you can find his weakness."

With that last command, Hans began looking for a hiding spot. With someone like Nicki coming into our home, there was no way he'd leave me alone. "Don't attack unless provoked," I commanded my brother. "We're pretending not to know, right?"

Despite knowing his intentions I still loved him and was too easily attached. I could tell my brother was slightly in disagreement with me but agreed for the sake of tactic. Hans wanted to murder Nicholas as soon as possible. He wanted to show Grizelda to fear us but if we blew our cover now he could go for the heart sooner than later. Even I understood that. I was beginning to understand why Hansel hadn't wanted me to love so much like his friend who was a hero. I didn't want to fight Nicholas at all, even after all this.

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