It had been a week and I started to help stuff Asher and Oliver's stuffed toys into a plastic trash bag. I had already helped them place all their clothes into their small suitcases and all that was left to do was get myself ready.

"Do you think our new parents will be nice?" Asher asked me as I sat tying his shoes.

Oliver sat waiting for me to do the same. He looked at Asher and said, "I like them."

New parents? Like? We hardly knew them and we were being adopted like pets. I've heard a few times about a Pre-Adoptive home. We go and stay with our 'new parents' for a while. Anytime they see that they don't want us they give our social workers a call, we get picked up and never come back.

"I don't know," I told them as I finished tying their shoes.

If I don't love you, North, then no one will.

~^~

I zipped my bag up and made sure to stick my sketchbook in the front pocket. Grabbing my plastic bag with all of my clothes, I walked out of my old room.

We said our goodbyes to Ms. Ellie, probably my longest foster mom that we've had in a while, before piling in the van. We listened to Disney songs on the way to our adoptive parent's house that was about half an hour away.

They told us that the Thompson's lived in a very nice neighborhood that had lots of kids. They also owned a dog, Daisy, and a cat, Thor? The boys were extremely excited about this because we've never had any pets except fish.

"I won't say anymore because I want you all to see it for yourselves," our social worker, Mrs. Haley, told them. The boys whined but loudly talked about what the house might look like.

"I bet it's going to be huge and have this huge playset and we are going to eat lots of candy," Oliver imagined.

I laughed at his fantasy. "I'm pretty sure we are going to eat other stuff than just candy, Ollie."

"Yeah like hotdogs and Mac and Cheese!"

Asher looked at the two of us. "I just want to meet the dog and take it for walks. I can throw sticks and play adventure with her."

"What do you want, North?" They asked me and my smiled faded.

What did I want? A family that accepted us for who we were? Someone that truly loved us? I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't know right now."

~^~

The van pulled into a neighborhood and I watched as some teenagers walked down the sidewalk. A group of boys played basketball at a house and it seemed... peaceful.

Mrs. Haley drove into a driveway of a family-size home. The house was two stories with blue wooden planks and white trimmings. The house had a small porch with two white rocking chairs which Mr. and Mrs. Thompson sat on them waiting for us.

"Welcome to your new home," Mrs. Haley smiled as she parked the car.

This is just another family that's ready to break our heart once more, I thought and opened the car door. I avoid eye contact with them as they went to the car to greet us.

Olive struggled to carry his suitcase and trash bag and I reached over to help but Mr. Thompson stopped me. "I've got it North. You're welcome to head on in."

I grabbed the bags before he could and carried them over my shoulder. "It's fine. I've got it." Like I always do.

Mr. Thompson opened his mouth to say something but Asher interrupted, "Can I see Daisy now! I want to see the doggie!"

"Of course! Daisy's really excited to meet you all," he laughed and motioned for us to follow. Mrs. Thompson stood talking with our social worker and Oliver was holding onto my pants leg.

Mr. Thompson opened the front door and a pale blonde dog that was very fluffy greeted us. She stood on her hind legs and pawed at the air. "Down Daisy!" The dog stopped and sat down but her tail continued to wag freakishly fast.

Asher dropped his bag and hugged the dog at lightning speed. The dog licked his face excitedly and Oliver went over and hugged the dog also.

"The boys' room is just up the stairs and yours is across from it. Feel free to change anything in your room," he told me and I set off. The boys' room looked exactly like a kid's room. Two race car beds sat up against the walls. A bookshelf stood in the middle between the two and a toy box near the two windows. The walls were painted a light blue like the house. I quickly dropped their bags on the beds before stepping out.

I stood outside my room for a long time not bothering to opening it. Swirls and patterns traced the wooden door and while they may not be perfect lines, they were perfect enough to be in this house. Maybe there is no such thing as a perfect person, that each one of us has our own flaws and imperfections. I ran a hand over the door before opening it.

A queen-sized bed with purple sheets was the largest thing in the room. The room was a little larger than the previous rooms that I have had in the past. A desk was placed in front of the window that overlooked the forest behind the house. A dresser and a bookshelf to go along with it. Stepping inside I gawked at the place and dropped my stuff to the floor. The feeling was quite overwhelming that I slid to the floor with these new feelings not sure how to process it.

In the end, I started to cry but I wasn't sure why.