Chapter 04 | Golf Is An Old Person's Pastime

"Hi boyfriend," I say, answering my ringing phone.

"Hey babe," Graham replies. "What are you doing?"

"Thinking about changing my major to biochemistry," I randomly tell him.

"Biochemistry?" He echoes with a small chuckle. "Why would you subject yourself to that level of torture?"

"Well, because I'm watching Grey's Anatomy right now and it's that one episode where that kid gets get admitted to Seattle Grace after he gets impaled through the chest with the tree limb. Remember that one?" I ask curiously, sitting up in my bed and pausing Netflix so I can actually hold a conversation.

"Considering the fact that you made me watch each season about five times with you, I think that it'd be pretty hard for me to forget," Graham tells me.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," I giggle. "Anyway, so yeah, it's that episode and I don't know, I just think that it's so cool that this dumb teenager literally gets catapulted into a tree and the tree just pierces him straight through the chest. And you would think that would have killed him on impact, but no, they bring this kid to Seattle Grace and Webber and Bailey and Alex and Callie all operate on him and they save his life! Like, that's so cool! Don't you think it's cool that you can literally be on death's doorstep and then all of a sudden, your life is saved? I love that," I tell him and I know that I'm rambling, but I can't help it. Grey's Anatomy is just the kind of show that makes a person ramble, especially a person that's already prone to it, i.e., me.

"Yeah, I guess that's pretty cool," Graham agrees and he laughs again. I wonder why he's so laughy. "So, what, you want to be a surgeon now?" He asks.

"I don't know," I shrug, even though he obviously can't see me. "Maybe," I decide. "I don't know if I can handle all the blood and guts and death though."

"I'm sure you could. If you really want to do it, you should go for it," Graham tells me. "Plus, you'd look really cute in Brookhaven Memorial's doctor scrubs."

"I look cute in everything I wear though," I tell him and it sounds conceited, but it took me a long time to gain self-confidence, so I'm gonna embrace it.

"You do," Graham agrees. "And everything you don't wear," He adds in slyly before clearing his throat and saying, "So, what do you have planned for today?"

I blush at his sly remark and thank my lucky stars that we aren't face-to-face right now, because he'd definitely tease me for blushing and I'd blush more and the cycle would just continue and it'd just be kind of awful. He claims that my blushing is cute, but then again, everything I do he thinks is cute.

"I think I'll whine a little bit over the fact that you're not here," I tell him matter-of-factly. "Then I'll probably just go to a club with Piper and Sienna."

Today is September 2, aka, my birthday. My twenty-first birthday, as a matter of fact, which is a pretty big deal, I guess. I mean, I can finally legally drink, which is nice, I guess, but nothing to get too excited over because I'm not really a big drinker. This is my first birthday in the near three years that Graham and I have been together that he won't be here for my birthday, which is sad, but I'm not mad or anything, because that'd be stupid.

He's away at Kansas and I'm here in Boston, so I wasn't really expecting him to fly all the way out here just for my birthday. He came last year though and the year before that and the year before that, but he told me he wouldn't be able to make it this year. He didn't really specify a reason why and I decided not to pry.

He did, however, have a twenty-one white roses, aka, my favorite flowers, delivered to my apartment this morning and we had a pre-birthday Skype date last night, which was weird and corny, but super adorable nonetheless. So, it isn't a big deal that he can't be here. I'll see him soon.

"Just have fun with your friends," Graham suggests. "Knowing Sienna and Piper, they've probably concocted up some kind of huge, elaborate thing for your birthday. I think I should be able to come out to Boston in a few weeks and when I do, you and I can do something fun as a belated birthday kinda thing."

"Something like what?" I ask curiously and that's when I notice an annoying little pinging sound outside of my window, like something's hitting at the glass.

He says something, but I don't really hear it, because by this point I'm getting paranoid by the constant pinging on my window. I mean, it's probably just a tree branch or something, but I'm afraid it might break the glass, which would be awful, considering how much I'm paying to live here.

I get up from my bed then and walk over to my window, pulling the curtain back, looking outside with an annoyed look on my face. Immediately though, when I see him standing down in the bushes, with a handful of small rocks, the annoyed look turns into a shocked one and I start squealing like a dumb, overexcited seal.

"Graham!" I exclaim into the phone and then take off running, through the living room, and out the front door. I don't even bother waiting on the elevator, I just take the stairs all the way to the lobby and then I run outside, looking for Graham. I find him in the same spot, with that same goofy grin on his face, and I run over to him, practically jumping into his arms when I get to him. "You said you weren't coming this year!" I remind him, happy tears falling from my eyes as I wrap my arms around him as tight as humanly possible.

"I guess I lied about that," Graham says then. "Happy birthday, baby girl."

"No," I mumble, waking up from my dream. I guess you can't really call it a dream though; it was more like a memory. "Karev," I groan, turning over in my bed, but keeping my eyes snapped shut, with the hope of keeping my dream/memory going. "Karev, please," I mutter as I feel my annoying (but super lovely) puppy rubbing up against me and licking my arm like the weirdo he actually is. "Karev, stop it right now!" I exclaim and then I immediately feel bad because Karev just starts whining and it just kinda breaks my heart.

I accept then that even if he does leave me alone, my dream/memory/whatever is over. So, I might as well stop being mean to my dog. With a small sigh, I roll over and sit up in my bed, glancing down at my whining puppy.

"I'm sorry," I tell him, scooping him up in my arms and sitting him down in my lap. "I still love you," I assure him. If Karev is anything like me, then he needs constant reassurance that he's loved. I think that when Graham and I were still together, he realized that, because he told me he loved me a lot. Connor doesn't do it so much though, which is understandable, because our relationship is still a little too new to just be throwing random I-love-you's.

Karev stops whining then and I start petting him, letting out a small sigh. I don't normally dream about Graham, if you're wondering, which would be weird, since I'm with Connor now. I think that that whole lunch fiasco thing yesterday and me finding out that Paisley is having his kid just kind of freaked me out.

I've decided that I'm just going to try to not think about it though, because yesterday when I got home, I couldn't stop thinking about it and it gave me a massive headache. Also, it's really none of my concern or business because Graham is an adult and there's nothing tying us together anymore.

"Are you hungry?" I ask my puppy, getting up from my bed with him still in my arms. "I told Connor to feed you before he left yesterday," I inform him.

I think Karev gets annoyed with me talking to him like he's a human though, because he jumps out of my arms and runs over on his little chubby legs to his food bowl, which is empty. His water bowl is only halfway empty though, so I conclude that he probably just already ate all of his food. Like I said, he's a very greedy puppy and he'll probably get really fat soon enough, but he'll still be super adorable. I tried putting him on a diet, but he wasn't having it.

I refill Karev's food and water bowls then and he starts happily chomping on the food and his tail is wagging and I know he's happy, which is good. At least one of isn't completely confused on how to feel right now. I decide then that a shower will probably make me feel better, so I grab some random clothes from my dresser and then go into my bathroom, jumping into the shower.

Twenty minutes later, I'm out and dressed and in the living room, flicking through the channels, looking for something to watch. After a couple of minutes though, I give up and settle on the game channel. As I'm watching a Family Feud rerun, my phone vibrates and I pick it up from the coffee table, realizing then that it's been in here since I got back from "lunch" with Graham yesterday.

I put in the password and see that I just got a text from Piper saying that she's on her way back home. I don't know why she feels the need to tell me the things, but she does, so I send a simple 'okay' and then I realize that I've got seven unread text messages and four missed calls.

Sighing, I go to my call log and see that one of the missed calls is from Graham and three are from Sienna. Typical. I'm sure Graham told Sienna how everything went down yesterday and she obviously called to start an argument. It's like she doesn't want to be friends anymore or something, which is absolutely ridiculous. I go to the messages then and see that all seven are from Sienna, which is weird.

Something in me snaps then and I'm about to call her and tell her to stop being a nosy ass bitch because she doesn't even know what she's talking about. And yeah, I know that that's a rude thing to call your best friend, but right now she's not acting very much like a best friend.

Heck, she's not even acting like a regular friend. Because I don't want to hurt her feelings though and because I don't particularly feel like yelling at her, I just lock my phone and put it down and go back to watch the hilariousness that is Family Feud.

About halfway through the episode, the door to the apartment and in walks Piper, which is amazing, because Piper is pretty much my closest friend now that Sienna's all anti-Sawyer and Aspen lives across the world. Also, because I haven't seen her in a couple of days and I really miss her. It's kind of crazy how weird it feels to get used to living with someone and them go away for a couple of days. She and Jason do it a lot though, so I've gotten used to it.

"Piper!" I exclaim, hoping up from the couch and running towards my friend.

"Sawyer!" She replies, mimicking my cheery tone. "I was only gone for a couple of days, you know," Piper reminds me as I pull her in for a small hug.

"I know, but I missed you," I say truthfully, pulling out of the hug and sighing. "Also, a lot has happened since I couple of days, so I have to fill you in."

"Is everything okay?" Piper asks curiously, closing the front door and locking it and then heading into the living room, plopping down on the couch with her duffel bag.

She and Jason were originally only supposed to be staying at his mom's beach house for a few hours, but I guess they decided that they needed more time, so that's where she's been the past few days. I guess her cell reception was really bad there, because I wasn't able to reach her the entire time she was gone, so she doesn't know that Beckett and Aspen are back or about Graham's unborn baby or anything.

"Well, that would depend on your definition of the word 'okay'," I say with a shrug. "But anyways, I'll tell you the good news first: Aspen's home!" I blurt.

"Aspen's home?" Piper echoes, raising her eyebrows in surprise with a huge smile on her face. "What? When? God, I miss her so much! Where is she?"

"Well, Beckett's back too, but yeah, she's home!" I exclaim. "They're staying for the summer and my mom is letting them stay at my old house since it's just kind of sitting there, so I guess that's where they are now," I tell Piper. "Also, speaking of my brother, I tried to stop him, but he ate your ice cream," I tell her upfront so she doesn't think that I did it. I'm telling you, this girl doesn't play about her food. Like, it's actually an issue if I eat any of her stuff.

"I knew there was a reason I didn't like Beckett," Piper groans with a frown on her face. "Aside from the fact that he won't stop calling me Thing 2."

"I'll make him buy you some more ice cream," I laugh, making a mental note to do just that.

"Perfect," She says, the frown disappearing from her face. "Wait, so that was the only bad news? That your greedy pig of a brother ate my ice cream?"

"Well, no, not exactly," I deny, shaking my head. "The bad news is that Graham is back too."

"Graham's back?" Piper echoes, her eyes going wide. "Holy shit! I leave home for five days and everything changes! Actual story of my life," She exclaims.

"That's not even the worst part," I mumble, leaning back into the couch and crossing my arms.

"What, is he dating someone or something?" She wonders, giving me a curious look. "Because that wouldn't really be that bad, would it? You've got Connor."

"It wouldn't be that bad," I agree. "But it's not even that. It's about a ten billion times worse."

"I'm sure you're just exaggerating as usual," Piper replies, running her fingers through her hair. "I mean, what could be worse than him having a girlfriend?"

"Him having a baby," I deadpan, glaring up at the ceiling.

"Well, yes, obviously, but that'd never happen," She says.

I don't say anything in response and I think Piper is waiting for me to say something, but I don't, so we just sit there in silence for a couple of seconds.

"Holy guacamole!" Piper yelps, evidently putting it together. "Graham's having a baby?" She asks, grabbing my arm and shaking it. "Are you for serious?"

"Totally for serious," I murmur. "That one girl I told you about, from the Florida thing?" I say, glancing over at her and she nods. "Yeah, she's pregnant."

"Nope, I refuse to believe that," Piper decides all of a sudden, shaking her head. "There is no way in hell Graham would actually get a girl pregnant that's not you, as weird as that sounds," She tells me. "I mean, obviously I support your relationship with Connor because I know you love him and I know he loves you and he's such a gem and it's super cool that he sometimes cooks for us, but Graham is, you know, he's kind of like your soulmate," Piper rambles.

"Yeah, I'm not too sure I believe in all that soulmate stuff," I tell Piper truthfully.

"Well, you should. Why do you think I never gave up on Jason's cheating ass?" She asks rhetorically. "But how do you even know that Penelope is pregnant?"

"Paisley," I remind her. "Her name is Paisley, Piper," I laugh a quiet little laugh.

"Her name is irrelevant," Piper assures me, waving her hand dismissively and rolling her eyes. "Seriously though, how do you know that she's pregnant?"

So I tell her everything that happened over the past few days while she's been gone, starting with Graham's voicemail and ending with our botched lunch yesterday when he dropped the bomb on me that's he's going to be a father. I haven't told anyone else about it yet, not even Connor, so I feel a little guilty.

"Maybe it's not his," Piper suggests once I've told her everything. "Maybe she got knocked up my some jerk and Graham's just trying to be a good friend?"

"Graham's a great guy, but I don't think that even he, with all of that greatness, would volunteer as tribute to be this girl's baby daddy if he wasn't," I say.

"Did you just make a reference to The Hunger Games?" Piper randomly asks me.

"I think so, which was dumb of me, because I actually hate that movie franchise."

She stares blankly at me for a second and then shakes her head and says, "We'll have to discuss your awful taste in movies later. Anyway, have you told Aspen this? What did she say? I bet she thinks he's not the dad either. Oh my God, what about Sienna? Is she still Team Graham or what?" She asks.

"I haven't told Aspen yet, but I guess I will today. I don't know though. You remember how pissed off she was when Jason cheated on you back in high school; there's no telling what kind of crazy thing she would do if she knew that Graham was going to be a dad in a couple of months," I say, shuddering at the thought. Aspen is great, because she defends her friends without hesitation, but she's just so ruthless at times. "And he seems pretty sure he's the dad. Like, I didn't specifically ask him if he's the father, but I asked him if he was having a baby and he said yeah, so I guess he is. And as for Sienna, she's still being a mega bitch and I swear to God, if she doesn't cool it, I'm going to drive over to her house and I'm gonna go in and I'm gonna punch her."

"Violence never solves anything, my love," Piper tells me, shaking her head. "Okay, what we need to do then is go see Aspen and discuss this," She says.

"You go ahead and go," I suggest, not exactly in the mood to move. "I'll come by there later," I assure her. "I just kind of don't even want to do anything."

"Are you sure?" She asks, giving me a concerned look. "I can call her and have her just come over here, if you want."

"That's okay," I reply, shaking my head. "You guys haven't hung out in years and I've hung out with her since she got back. I'll meet up with you guys later."

"I kinda feel bad for leaving you here alone though, because you look all sad and melancholy and whatnot," She says.

"I don't look 'sad and melancholy and whatnot'," I argue with a humorless laugh. "This is just my neutral facial expression."

"Okay, if you say so," Piper appeases me, standing up and grabbing her car keys. "You promise you're gonna come by later?"

"Yeah, definitely," I nod. "I just want you two to have some time to catch up," I explain. "But in a few hours, I'll be there."

"Okay," She says, seemingly believing me. "Well, if you need me, call me and I'll come back."

"I don't know if I told you this lately, but you're a pretty great friend, Piper," I randomly tell her.

"Well, I mean, obviously," She chuckles. "I'll see you later, S," Piper adds before heading towards the front door and then out.

When she's gone, I realize that I didn't tell her not to tell Aspen about the Graham thing. I don't know if she will, but I don't really care at this point, to be honest. If she does tell her though, that means I wouldn't have to tell the story again, which is great. I mean, I didn't have to tell anyone in the first place, obviously, but, like I said, Piper's my closest friend out of the three of them, so I couldn't just not tell her what's been going on since she left town.

I pick up the remote and mute the TV and then let out a long, dramatic sigh and run my fingers through my hair. I hop up from the couch then and walk into the kitchen, going over to the pantry and pulling it open. Piper and I don't really buy a lot of canned goods, which I think is what you're supposed to keep in a pantry, but we needed something to fill the space with, so that's where we keep all of our alcohol. Piper likes to drink a lot of different stuff, so there's a bunch, but all I really drink is wine (which kind of makes me sound like a divorced middle-aged woman) and that's only every blue moon or so.

I take an unopened bottle of wine from the pantry, grab a corkscrew and a bendy straw, and then go back to the living room. Yeah, I like drinking my wine with a bendy straw and Piper makes fun of me for it, but I don't care. I settle back down on the couch with my wine and then close my eyes and start taking small sips through my bendy straw. And after a few seconds, my mind starts wandering and then I'm thinking about yesterday all over again.

And when I start thinking about yesterday and what Graham told me, I start thinking about Paisley. I wonder how far along she is into her pregnancy. Graham and I only broke up five months ago, so I suppose she can't be that far into it. Well, I guess she could, but I doubt it, because Graham told me he didn't have sex with her until after we broke up and I believe that. Not that that makes it any easier to handle though.

Then I start thinking about why they thought it'd be a good idea to bring her back to Massachusetts; surely she has her own family in Kansas or wherever she's native to. Then I start thinking that maybe the two of them are actually together, as in, like, dating. It would make perfect sense why he brought her back if they are together.

Graham told me that she's not his girlfriend, but why would he tell me any different? I'm sure he didn't want to even tell me about the pregnancy, but I guess he figured it'd be hard for me to hear it from someone else. I always have been a little bit weary of Graham and Paisley's "friendship" though, if I'm completely honest.

They met in Graham's junior year of college, after Paisley transferred to Kansas State from the University of Kansas...at least, I think that's where Graham said she came from. Anyway, she lived in the same residence hall as Graham did, on the floor right above his, and from what Graham told me, they just became friends. At the time, I believed it was just that, but now I'm starting to think that maybe there was more to it.

As I'm sitting there, I start trying to think back to any signs I could have missed that would have indicated Graham and Paisley had something going on. I don't get very far into it though, mostly because my memory is trash, and also because I hear the door of my apartment unlock and open, but I'm so tired and annoyed that I don't even bothering to turn around and see who it is. I assume it is Piper, although I don't know why she would have come back.

"Hey babe," Connor greets and I hear him close the door and walk into the living room.

I forgot I told him to take my keys with him when he left yesterday so that he could get back in today. I knew I probably wouldn't feel like moving much.

"Hey Connor," I reply with my eyes still closed, but trying (and failing) to sound upbeat.

"Why are you drinking that wine with a bendy straw?" He laughs, sitting down beside me.

"Because I never bought wine glasses and I don't like drinking straight from the bottle because it makes me look and feel like an alcoholic," I explain.

"It's kind of a little early in the day to be drinking though, isn't it?" Connor asks, taking the bottle out of my hand and setting it down on the coffee table.

"Yeah, I guess so, but I'm sad and this is what adults do when they're sad," I remind him matter-of-factly.

"Does it have anything to do with what happened yesterday when you were at lunch with Graham?" He asks.

"It pretty much has everything to do with that," I admit, finally opening my eyes at looking over at him. "I'm sorry," I randomly tell him, sighing yet again.

"Sorry for what?" Connor asks, giving me a weird look, like he thinks I'm drunk or something. According to him and Piper, I get emotional when I drink.

"You're just so amazing and perfect and I'm an awful girlfriend and I get sad over stupid stuff and I complain a lot and I just have really dumb reasoning."

"Okay, well, none of that is true," He assures me. "I mean, I can tell something happened and I'm not gonna make you tell me, but you can, if you want."

"It's not that I don't want to tell you, it's just I don't want you to be mad and when you realize how stupid it is that I'm upset over it, I think you will be."

"It'd have to be something pretty huge for me to be at you over it," He tells me. "Like, you'd have to say something like you had sex with him or something."

"Nothing like that," I tell him with a small laugh. "Let's just not talk about it anymore right now, yeah?" I suggest. "So, tell me, how has your day been?"

"Well, I went to work this morning and my dad got back from his business trip in Abu Dhabi, so when I got off, we went golfing and then I came here."

"You realize golf is an old person's pastime, yes?" I ask with a chuckle. Beck golfs too and I've told him the same thing for years and he's just denied it.

"It isn't," He argues, also letting out a small chuckle. "Anyway, so do you wanna go out to dinner tonight since we didn't get to go a few days ago?" He asks.

"That would be perfect," I sigh, realizing that since Graham's graduation and Aspen and Beck's return, Connor and I have spent next to no time together.

Also, spending some time with him Connor likely get my mind off of Graham and Paisley and their little fetus - baby Cambridge, that's what I'll call him/her - and that's just what I need right now. Not to mention the fact that Connor and food happen to be two of my favorite things in the whole world.

"Okay, well, where do you want to go?" Connor asks me then. "I can make reservations at the Rivera, but I don't know if we'll be able to get in tonight."

"We don't have to go to the Rivera," I say, deciding that I don't want to have to get all dressed up. "Let's go somewhere with milkshakes. I love milkshakes."

"Some place with milkshakes it is, then," He says. "So, what are you doing today? Hanging out with your friends?"

"I'm supposed to be," I confirm with a nod and then pick up my phone as it vibrates with a text message. I immediately get annoyed, because my first thought is that it's another stupid text from Sienna (which I definitely couldn't handle right now), but then I see Aspen's name flash across the screen.

It reads:

"Everything alright?" Connor asks, I guess taking notice of the weird look on my face after reading Aspen's text. So, Piper did tell, which is good, I guess.

"Everything's peachy," I mutter, sending Aspen a quick text, telling her that it's true what Piper told her, that I'm okay, and that I'll be over there later. "But yeah, I was supposed to be hanging out with Aspen and Piper, but not Sienna because Sienna's being mean and jerky, but Aspen's pretty fired up right now, so maybe I'll just go and see her later on tonight or something," I shrug. "What do you have planned in the meantime? More old people's sports?"

"No," He laughs, shaking his head. "Preston's dad got him a boat for his 21st last week and he wanted me to come with him and some of the guys to take it out on the lake today and I was all for it, until last night when I got back to my apartment and was looking for something to watch and saw that Titanic was on. I figured it was an omen, so I bailed and now I have nothing to do, so I just going to go hang out at my place, but I wanted to check on you first."

"Well, that was nice of you," I chirp. "Although, I don't think that Titanic coming on the day before you were supposed to go on Preston's boat was a sign from up above or anything. That movie is always on, you know. People like it," I explain, starting to feel a little better for the first time since yesterday.

"Maybe, maybe not," Connor shrugs. "Better to be safe than sorry though."

"You're very weird," I state, picking up the remote and turning off the TV.

"Coming from my twenty-one year old girlfriend who was just drinking alcohol through a pink bendy straw," He laughs.

"Touché," I giggle, standing up from the couch then and reaching my hand out for his. "Come on, get up. Choppy chop."

"Where are we going?" He asks, clearly confused by the topic change. Nevertheless, he grabs my hand and stands up.

"To my bedroom to put on a movie that we're not actually going to watch," I bluntly explain.

"Four years I've known you and I still haven't gotten use to how candid you are," He states.

"Life's too short to be any other way," I chirp, leading him into my bedroom and then calling Karev's name, telling him to go to Piper's room, which he does because, like I said, he's a genius puppy. I'm glad Graham didn't ask for him back when we broke up because I'm pretty sure that would have killed me.

Connor says something in response, but it's kind of under his breath, so I don't really hear him. It sounds like an agreement though, so I don't ask him to repeat himself. He goes over and plops down on my bed and I go over to my television and turn it on, going to the Netflix app and waiting for it to start up.

"What movie do you wanna turn on?" I ask, even though I guess it doesn't matter, considering the fact that we probably won't be paying it much attention.

"Doesn't matter," Connor tells me. "Anything's fine," He adds with a shrug.

"If I Stay it is, then," I reply, selecting it and then walking over to my bed.

And because you and I have been together for a quite some time now, you know me. And you know that I have never been the type of girl that likes to beat around the bush. That being said, I don't want to just sit here for half an hour, pretending like I care about this Chloe Grace Mortez girl's character's out-of-body experience or whatever the movie is even about. So I'm not going to do that. When I get over to my bed, instead of sitting down on it, I sit down on his lap and then straddle him and loosely lock my arms around his neck.

"Hey, guess what," I randomly tell him, looking down at him with a small smile on my face.

"What's that?" He wonders, placing both of his hands on my waist.

"I love you," I pipe, leaning down and kissing his cheek. "A bunch."

"I love you too, Sawyer," Connor replies with a small grin. "A bunch," He adds, mocking me.

I playfully roll my eyes at him then before leaning down and pressing my lips against his. It doesn't take long at all for our kiss to heat up and the next thing I know, I'm on my back and Connor's hovering over me and my shirt is gone and so is his and he's kissing my neck and there's moaning and there's groaning and everything's just moving so fast. Not that that's such a big deal though; it's not like we haven't been together before.

All I know though is that in this moment, the four people I'm trying my very hardest not to think about (He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, and I'm not talking about Lord Voldemort here, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named's baby mama, baby Cambridge, and Sienna) are very, very, far from my mind. And that's just the way I like it.

❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁

"Why are you so coming late?" Aspen asks me a couple of hours later when I ring on the doorbell to my old house and she pulls it open almost instantaneously.

"I was busy," I shrug, walking in and closing the door behind me.

"Doing what?" Aspen wonders, leading me into the living room, where I see Piper eating out of a tub of ice cream, mint chocolate chip, to be more specific.

"Just stuff," I state with a small laugh, sitting down on the couch.

"Okay," Aspen replies, giving me a weird look and I can tell she wants to pry, but she doesn't, for which I'm incredibly thankful. "So, we have to talk."

"We do," Piper interjects. "Like, this is a pretty big deal, Sawyer."

"I know, I know, I know," I assure them. "But I mean, what's there to talk about, really? He's having a baby and there's just nothing I can do about it."

"Maybe we could get Phoebe to agree to a paternity test," Aspen says.

"Her name is Paisley and that's really not necessary," I sigh. "I'm sure she's not some deranged girl who just picked Graham to be the father of her kid."

"Maybe she is though," Piper argues. "You really never know, you know."

"I highly doubt that that's the case, but even if it is, that's really none of my business," I remind my deluded friends. "Graham's life isn't my business."

"But you still love him, don't you?" Aspen asks, I guess to prove a point.

"I was with him for three years and we broke up five months ago; of course I still love him, but I don't love him love him, you know? I love Connor now."

"Aspen's being very aggressive right now, but the point is, we want you to be happy," Piper interjects, clearly wanting to get the situation together before an argument breaks out or something. Not that I think it would; Piper's juts proactive like that. "Aspen is just a little bit biased because she doesn't live with you and she doesn't get to see how adorable you and Connor are on a daily basis. And there's there Sienna, who...well, you know. She just sees Graham as a wounded little sea turtle or something and she thinks you've wronged him and her first instinct is to attack. So, basically, they can't help but want to see you back with Graham. But I'm sensible and I just want you to know that it's okay to be sad about it; you don't have to go around pretending you don't care. It's only normal to care. Heck, if Jason and I were to break up tomorrow and years from now I found out he was having a kid, I'd be pretty torn up about it. So, yeah, don't get mad and think that we're trying to push you towards Graham (even though he's your soulmate), just know that we want you happy."

"What she said," Aspen says, nodding in agreement.

I open my mouth to tell Piper that she should really consider switching from that dumb ECE major to something like psychology or philosophy or something because that was actually insanely philosophical. Before I have the chance to get the words out though, the doorbell rings, reverberating through the house.

"I'll get it," Piper announces then, hoping up from the couch and heading out of the living room.

"Okay, but really, is Grawyer definitely 100% dead?" Aspen asks with a sad look on her face.

"Sorry to be the one to, uh, sink your ship or whatever, but yes, that's completely dead," I say.

"Well, at least I have you and Chad to ship," She chirps, twisting a lock of her hair around her finger.

"Connor, Aspen, his name is Connor," I say, rolling my eyes at her. "You're gonna have to learn that."

"I will learn that," She assures me. "Well, what even do you guys call yourself? Like, Cowyer or what?"

"We don't call ourselves anything, because we're adults in college, not teenagers in high school," I chuckle.

"That's not how it works, dummy," She sighs. "Why do you think Kimye and Brangelina and Tavin exist?"

"Touché," I reply. "I dunno, I mean, you came up with Grawyer and Grawyer, after all," I remind her.

"This is true," Aspen says. "Hmm, what about Sonner? Or maybe, like, Conyer? Or maybe Sawor?"

"Or maybe just 'Sawyer and Connor'," I say, because that whole situation isn't really a big deal to me.

"Sienna!" Piper shouts all of a sudden and then there's the sound of high heels hitting titled floor. "Seriously, don't!" Piper exclaims.

"Sawyer, what the hell is wrong with you?" Sienna demands and I turn and see her entering the room, looking pissed off per usual.

"Well, hello to you too, best friend who lives across the world and is just now seeing me for the first time in, like, two years," Aspen says to Sienna.

"Sorry, Aspen. We can most definitely catch up later," Sienna apologizes, sending her a barely-there smile. "Sawyer, why are you being this way?"

"Why am I being this way?" I ask in disbelief, giving her a confused look. "What do you mean why am I being this way? Why are you being that way?"

"Because you're just being a Grade-A bitch to Graham and now he won't stop moping around my house and it's getting to the point where it's depressing."

"Why do you think it's my job to fix Graham?" I ask, raising my eyebrows. "I didn't do anything to him!"

"You broke up with him for no good reason!" She says and now she's yelling and it's making my head hurt.

"That's completely untrue, but even if I did, what business of that would be yours, Sienna?" I yell. "What happened between us is none of your business!"

"It is my business, because he's my friend! He's one of my best friends, actually, and I'm not gonna let you walk all over him and invalidate his feelings."

"Are you forgetting what role you played in us breaking up?" I ask, standing up because now I'm mad.

"Me?" She asks, furrowing her eyebrows like she's confused. "I didn't have anything to do with that."

"Really? Are you seriously going to stand there and say that you had nothing to do with why Graham and I broke up?"

"Yeah, I really am, because I didn't," She says. "No one made you break his heart; you did that own your own."

"Literally one of the main reasons why we even broke up is because you filled his head with a bunch of nonsensical bullshit and made him think I cheated!"

"You seem to have moved on from Graham mighty fast though, for having been dating him for four years - maybe you were cheating on him, I don't know!"

"Okay, okay, okay," Aspen mutters, I guess thinking that that's the moment she should intervene, before things get ugly, which, at this rate, will be soon.

"Guys, why don't we just calm down?" Piper asks, walking back in. "The four of us haven't been together for years, let's just have a good time," She says.

"How dare you stand there and say that," I say to Sienna, completely ignoring Piper and Aspen. "You know damn well I never even thought about cheating."

"But what was I supposed to think though, when you spent pretty much every second of every day cuddled up with that Conrad guy?" Sienna asks me then.

"I was never 'cuddled up' with him!" I exclaim, blinking back tears. "He was my friend, Sienna! That's literally all. Not that I owe you an explanation."

"It's just kinda funny," She shrugs. "He was your 'friend', but not even two months after you break up with your boyfriend for no reason, you get with him."

"Sienna, you're one of my best friends and I love you lots, but I swear, if you don't stop talking about things you know nothing about, I'm gonna punch you."

"I'm not trying to antagonize you or anything, I just need to know why you thinks it's okay to treat him like this," Sienna says. "That guy loves you so much."

"Well, he has a funny way of showing it, by getting a girl pregnant," I scoff.

"You broke up with him three days before Christmas! What did you expect?"

"I'm done with this," I decide as my migraine reaches an all-time high. "I'm not going to stand here and have this dumb argument with you. It's childish."

"I'm not asking you to have an argument with me," Sienna says, rolling her eyes at me. "I just trying to understand why you did what you did to Graham."

"Oh my God!" I exclaim, throwing my hands up. "Are you in love with him or something?"

"What?" Sienna asks, looking slightly taken aback by that question, like she's confused.

"I mean, you spend so much time riding his dick that the only reason I could see being for that is that you're in love with him!" I say. "So, what, are you?"

"Oh my God," Aspen gasps. "Oh Jesus, this is not good. This is very, very not good."

"Should we call someone?" I hear Piper ask Aspen. "Like, I don't know, Beckett?"

"I'm not in love with Graham, Sawyer," Sienna finally replies. "I just think that you owe us an explanation, that's all and I'm not leaving until I get one."

"Us?" I repeat. "What do you mean 'us'? Sienna, I don't owe you a goddamn thing and I don't owe Graham a goddamn thing, so, really, you just need to go."

"Why are you being such a selfish brat right now?" Sienna asks. "First, you break up with him and then you leave him in the rain, and now you ignore him."

"Why are you so worried about it?" I wonder and that's when I feel tears start streaming down my face. Damn me for being an angry crier. "Just leave."

Sienna crosses her arms across her chest and stares blankly at me and I realize then that she's actually serious about not leaving. At least, not willingly, that is. I with the tears away and then take the necessary steps towards her then and grab her arm. If I have to drag her to the front door, I'll do it.

"Sawyer, stop it!" Sienna exclaims, pushing me about as hard as humanly possible and I stumble but I don't fall.

"Then get out!" I yell. "Accept the fact that Graham and I are done, get the fuck over it, and stop being a bitch!"

Sienna sighs and then turns to walk away, but under her breath, I hear her say, "Such a fucking bitch."

And that's when I kind of lose it. I lose it because it reminds me of Flynn and how that used to be his favorite phrase to describe me. And she knows it.

So I walk up behind her and, returning the favor, I push her with as much force as I can muster and she stumbles and loses her footing, but she doesn't fall. Instead, she turns around and she slaps me across the face and then it's just a full-blown fight.

We both end up on the floor and there's kicking and there's punching and there's slapping and there's hair-pulling and there's scratching and it's just really awful and in the midst of it, I remember why I don't fight; I'm slightly terrified of breaking my neck and dying.

It doesn't last very long though, because Piper runs over to me and Aspen runs over to Sienna and they're trying to pull us apart and as a result, they both get pretty banged up, but eventually, I just stop and let Piper pull me away from Sienna.

"Sienna, get the hell out of here," Aspen barks, pulling Sienna up from the floor with an angry, but sad look on her face.

Sienna doesn't put up any argument and I would guess it's probably because she's just as winded, if not more, than I am. So she grabs her keys from the floor, along with her phone, and then she gives me a dirty look and turns and walks out of the living room, then the front door.

And that, ladies and gentleman, is how I lost one of my very best friends in the world.

❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁

"Like, how are you just going to walk into my old house and pick a fight with me?" I say a few hours later, sitting in a booth with Connor.

"Yeah, that is pretty ridiculous," He agrees, taking a sip of his soda. "So, it wasn't just an argument, then? Like, you two actually fought?"

"Yeah, like, an actual fight," I nod, taking a deep breath and slowly blowing it out.

"Well, she didn't hurt you or anything, did she?" Connor asks. "You're feeling okay?"

"Physically, I feel just fine," I reply truthfully. "Sienna couldn't hurt a disabled dragonfly."

At first, my back was hurting and I, being the slightly paranoid person I am, thought I had a spinal injury or something, but it doesn't hurt anymore, so I guess I don't. Now though, I have a headache, but it's okay, because I pretty much always have a headache. I don't know why, but I do, so it's bearable.

"Well, that's good," Connor chuckles. "So, what, she's mad at you for breaking up with Graham?"

"Yeah, I guess so," I confirm. "But I think that she's just secretly in love with him or something."

"Why do you think that?" He wonders.

"She just cares a little bit too much."

It is 6:00 right now and Connor and I are at a burger shack here in Boston. After the whole fight situation with Sienna, I almost asked for a rain check, because I wasn't really feeling up to it, but then I realized that that would mean rain-checking our rain check, which wouldn't be fair to Connor. Also, I remembered that he said we could go somewhere with milkshakes and that alone made coming worth it. I mean, spending time with him is awesome too, but that obviously goes without saying.

"Or maybe she just doesn't like me and doesn't want you to be with me," Connor guesses. "Because every time she comes over, she basically ignores me."

"Yeah, she doesn't like you very much and she sometimes calls you by the wrong name on purpose," I admit. "But that's okay, because I like you," I add.

"Okay then," He laughs. "So, what do you want to eat?" He asks, gesturing down at my menu.

"Definitely a milkshake or three," I reply, ignoring all the food and looking at that subsection.

"You're gonna get sick if you do that," Connor warns me, looking down at his own menu.

"But you're take care of me, won't you?" I ask, glancing over at him.

"Yeah, unless it's contagious or something, then I don't think I can," He jokingly says.

"Oh wow, total Boyfriend of the Year material," I sarcastically reply.

"I know," Connor grins and then motions for the server to come over, which she does.

When she comes over, I decide that I want chicken wings and cheese fries, which sounds like a not-so-great combination, but I like chicken wings and I like cheese fries, so why not. I also order a chocolate milkshake (only one, because I really am not keen on the idea of throwing it all up later tonight). Connor gets a normal cheeseburger and fries and the server, Kat, according to her nametag, walks off, telling us that she'll be back in a couple of minutes.

And so she does. The food is scorching hot, but it's really amazing and I'm pretty much starving, so I just deal with it. We talk, Connor and I, but about nothing in particular. It's really amazing though because there's not too many people in the burger shack and they're playing some really amazing background music.

Connor starts tell me about his friend Preston, the guy with the rich daddy who got him a boat for his twenty-first birthday, which, by the way, is kind of insane. I mean, when I turned twenty-one, I got a puppy (which is really lovely) and a birthday cake from my parents and that's it, but this guy got a boat. Anyway though, Connor's telling me about how Preston thought his boat was going to capsize and they were going to die, but it was a false alarm.

About half an hour later, we're still eating and things are going really well and I'm actually kind of starting to forget how awful part of this day has been. The door to the burger shack opens and out of reflex, I glance over at it and my heart drops to my stomach when I see who's coming in.

It's Graham and he's not by himself. In behind him walks a disgustingly beautiful brunette girl who looks like she's about our age and my height. Without really meaning to, I glance down at her stomach. It's not, you know, huge or anything, but it's abundantly obvious she's pregnant, but probably only four or five months along.

I drop my head down and look at the table, praying that Graham doesn't see me. I know that he won't come over and start talking to me or anything, what with Connor sitting right across from me, but it'll still be awkward. Like I said, there's not too many people in here right now, so I would guess I'd be easy to pick out, but I guess not, because Graham and Paisley (she's obviously the unnecessarily pretty brunette following him) walk right past me and there's no indication that Graham notices me, which is just amazing.

"Babe, did you hear me?" Connor asks, noticing my lack of attention.

"No, sorry," I say, looking back up at him. "What did you say?' I ask.

"I said, Preston wants you and me to come out on the boat with him and his girlfriend, Winona, I think it was, this weekend," He repeats.

"Oh, really?" I ask, glancing out of my peripheral vision and seeing that Graham and Paisley are sitting all the way across the restaurant.

"Yeah," Connor nods. "Are you up for it?"

"Yeah, definitely," I say. "Sounds great."

Author's Note

Three weeks, I know, I know, I know. But you'd prefer a good chapter that takes slightly longer than a bad chapter that's up in a week, yes? I'll try not to let it turn into a normal thing, but I'm not making any promises because tomorrow is my first day of senior year (ugh), so I'll be busy.

Anyway, so thoughts? A lot of you guys still don't like Connor (lol) but I'm hoping that you'll eventually come to love him. Thoughts on the little flashback dream thing at the beginning? Thoughts on that whole Sawyer and Sienna blow out? Do you think they'll be able to repair their friendship or do you think that it has run its course? Thoughts on anything at all? I know you didn't actually meet Paisley, but she did make an appearance and the actual meeting will come soon enough.

Picture: Sienna Richards (Nina Dobrev)

Song: Bad Blood Remix by Taylor Swift feat. Kendrick Lamar

Update: Idk, man tbh. I'm shooting for next week, but we'll just have to see how the school thing goes.