Shoutout to Bella for helping me with this chapter. I wouldn't have been able to write this without your ideas. THANK YOU!

"I love you is one of the most commonly used phrases in the English language. But hardly ever is it backed up with actions. And what does it matter to say it if you can't show it?"

— Forbidden Love

CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE

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The moment Marinette placed the crown upon Chat Noir's head, he fell into a deep sleep.

It was somewhat frightening to watch him suddenly fall unconscious into an unknown realm, and even though his chest rose and fell peacefully as he slept, she wondered if that peace would remain attached to him once his ritual began. Granted, she was just as worried as he had been about the ritual and what consequences lied ahead with it. Sure, there was always a possibility that the consequences for Chat Noir's full recovery could be her own life, but she had been positive that the staff could not be that cruel. If it had the ability to take lives, did it not have a soul, a mind, a heart or at least a little bit of sympathy? Alas, it was nothing but a staff. Those questions would sound ridiculous to any folk who knew nothing about these people's beliefs or customs.

But at this point, Marinette believed anything could be possible.

She wondered if the staff would take someone else's life if it came down to it. The King had mentioned before that the staff usually took something of importance—perhaps instead of her life, it would be more merciful and take the child that was currently in her stomach. It sounded cruel and selfish, but Marinette felt completely violated with the little child that was too innocent to really understand how much pain its presence caused. If the child was taken away, perhaps she could begin a new life with Adrien.

But that was a bit absurd. How could she consider a life with someone she never got to confess her love to? Chat Noir had been more than once truthful in that aspect and had poured out his heart many times, despite some of the things she once said to him in return. She wondered, even to this day, how he could still love her after all the pain she had caused him. Perhaps that was the true meaning of love, and she was one of the lucky few who was able to find it.

As she watched the maids carry Chat Noir's body away, she held onto the arrowhead that had somehow made it back into her dress pocket, and she squeezed it into her palm, as if it would somehow bring comfort to her lover while he slept. Somehow, she had forgotten that it was there even though she placed it there herself. Because although she was being forced to marry Nathaniel, she figured the arrowhead would bring her some sort of comfort as she sauntered down the aisle, knowing with all her heart that the man who had given it to her loved with every bit of his soul. She had no doubts about that anymore.

She often wondered if things would have played out differently in his favor, had she not stumbled into his life. She wondered, had she stayed on her side of the wall and simply done what she was expected to do, would he have remained unharmed? Sure, she would still be the stubborn goat she had grown up to be, be forced to marry a man who she did not love and eventually bear his children, but at least she would unknowingly be keeping the love of her life safe. But why would that matter? What was the point if she would never get to know who Chat Noir was?

Perhaps, in a way, she was glad she had climbed over that damn wall.

She watched as Chat Noir's limp body was loaded into the King's carriage and his father followed in to accompany his son. She watched his expression twist into one of fear, worry and concern.

Marinette knew better than anyone what that feeling was like.

She expected to be left behind, unsure of how to voice her troubled thoughts that she wished to accompany them as well. But Marinette did not have to say a word, for the King turned to look back at her and offered her a soft, pained smile, beckoning her to enter the carriage.

Marinette did not hesitate for a second.

When she entered, she found the maids all holding Chat Noir's body in place, stabilizing him so that he would not fall over during their ride back to the palace. Marinette stiffened; for the only place available to sit was across from her lover, beside the King, and all she wanted in that moment was to be able to hold Chat's head in her lap, stroke her fingers through his lovely blonde locks, and pray to the gods she hoped existed that he would make it through this ceremony in one piece.

One of the maids, noticing the young girl's hesitance, stood—bless her soul —and gestured with a soft smile that Marinette take her place in securing Chat Noir's head. The woman had no reason to react with such kindness, for it was partly Marinette's fault that her prince was in such a predicament, but the maid's actions were nothing but genuine, and the ravenette thanked her with a sad smile.

Marinette took the maid's place, after she was seated comfortably, the other maids lowered Chat Noir's head into her lap. She looked down into her lap to find his peaceful expression, and she gave into the temptation to run her delicate fingers through his blonde locks. She didn't have to look up to feel the King's eyes on her, studying her with the upmost concentration and compassion. Chat Noir had always assumed for the longest time that his father had never cared for him, but Marinette begged to disagree as she suddenly looked up to catch the King's concerned gaze.

She expected the man to look away at being caught in such a vulnerable state, but instead, the King smiled and whispered, "Thank you."

Marinette did not know how to respond. So, instead, she returned his smile gratefully. There were times before and after the dinner party when Marinette had feared that the King would dislike her for her race; because she was human, she had warned Chat Noir that his father's reaction may have been a negative one.

Chat Noir hadn't seemed to care at the time. He had been too focused on introducing her.

Now she understood why.

And yet, the King had welcomed her into his carriage with son, allowed her to rest the prince's head in her lap, and had granted her the permission to even remain in his world. Somehow, this species of people had more kindness than anyone she had never known in her world.

Her village could learn a thing or two from these people.

The King sighed unexpectedly, drawing in her attention. "I feel that I owe you an apology, my dear."

Marinette looked up, startled that the king had chosen to break the silence, let alone claim that he owed her any sort of apology. She opened her mouth to retort but closed it the moment she remembered that they were not the only ones who were currently seated in the carriage and arguing with the king before his subjects was probably considered extremely rude.

So, for this one rare occasion, Marinette obliged, stayed silent and nodded.

Soon they arrived at the palace, and Marinette was forced to allow the maids to take up Chat Noir's body into their arms once again and carry him out into the crowd of people as they headed for the ritual stone. The King was second to exit as he followed the maids with watchful eyes, and Marinette reluctantly followed, uncertainty filling her sprit the moment multiple eyes fell on her.

Truthfully, the people of this world were not aware that she was human, but they would be now. A few continued to stare even as she passed, and the feeling felt a bit uncomfortable – but she would not hold them accountable for it. She assumed they found it odd that a human rode in the same carriage as their king.

As they walked through the crowd, the people split to make a pathway for them, and Marinette noticed that the people reached out to their prince whenever he was near, touching any part of his body that they could reach or throwing flowers onto his path. Perhaps, it was to somehow guarantee that his journey would be safe or that their touches could bring him healing without consequences.

Nonetheless of what she thought, Marinette asked the king, "Why do the people touch him as he passes?"

The King remined looking forward as he replied, "The people have not seen a magic deed be performed in centuries. Many have forgotten that it is a possibility. But none have forgotten about what can happen when magic is used. They believe their touches can protect him on his journey."

Marinette wasn't sure how she felt about such a revelation. Perhaps she was slightly bothered by the fact that so many people were touching her lover. She had to remember to breathe for the sake of her dignity.

She was the one planning to live out the rest of her life with this man, not them.

For many years, Marinette had been taught that marriage was between a man and a woman who would be chosen to remain together forever by their elders. She was taught that one day she too would have this fate and that she would have no say in the matter. It is why she strived to attend the academy even when she was told that women were forbidden to accomplish a higher education; even when society excluded women from accomplishing something higher than a man. It is why Marinette rebelled against her aunt who was set in her ways. It was why she tried to dodge every man that stood in her way. It was why she had been so sure that she would never marry, because of all these stories she had heard about women becoming slaves to their husbands and never experiencing true happiness or love.

What was the point of a life like that? It wasn't even considered living! Marinette has always dreamed of one day becoming free, living a life with rules that she could make on her own, and doing the things she loved instead of living in misery. She never once thought that she could live a happy life, one of freedom and true love, with a man, until she met Adrien.

She prayed it would still be possible even with his life on the line.

Her focus was averted back into reality when she felt a touch to her arm, one that had come from one of the people in the crowd. It was one of her lover's species—Chat Noir's kind—who held her in place with a light grip, allowing her plenty of room to pull away. Marinette, however, paused and turned to the woman who she noticed had three little children at her feet, all covered in fur. The woman smiled, and with her other hand, held Marinette's hand in her own. "May the gods be with you." She rasped before releasing the ravenette and allowing her to head on her way. Marinette could not believe the gratitude and the love these people had for humanity—or at least for one human specifically. She returned the woman's smile over her shoulder as she rushed to catch up with the King.

They reached the ritual stone—a platform that stretched as far as the eye could see, and as she stepped on it, it raised, giving a complete view of the entire population of Chat's kind centered in the plaza to watch. It was an entire civilization that she would have never bothered to look at differently, had it not been for Chat Noir's perspective. When he awoke, that would be one of the many things she would thank him for.

Chat Noir's body was gently laid down across the stone in the center, where his father stood over him in concern, and Marinette rushed to kneel at his side, even though the maids gently insisted that she step away. But the King held up a hand. Marinette remained kneeled by her lover's head and continued to stroke her fingers through his blonde locks, caressing his scalp, and she could have sworn his ears twitched at the sensation—or maybe that had been her imagination.

The King rested a hand on her shoulder. "Are you sure you wish to remain so close to him during the ritual? There is a possibility that the magic may affect you as well."

Marinette shook her head. There was no way she was about to leave his side this time. If the magic was to affect her as well, then so be it.

"The properties could affect you negatively."

She shook her head once more. Nothing would get her to change her mind.

"Very well." The King nodded, "Then we shall begin the ritual."

The ceremony began shortly afterwards, and it started a lot differently than Marinette had imagined. The King stepped forward and raised his staff horizontally over his son's body in both hands and began to recite some sort of incantation, something Marinette could not comprehend since their people spoke an entirely different language. Still, she willed herself to pay attention to words she did not understand and tried her best to drown out her anxiety by brushing her fingers continually through his hair.

A tingling sensation reached her fingertips, but she refused to pull away from his touch. Marinette was expecting the worse to occur; the King had warned her after all that the magic of the staff could affect her as well, and what she felt could affect her negatively. If she was to be wed to him one day in some miraculous way, she would stay by his side.

For better or for worse.

Suddenly, the air around her felt thicker to breath, and she gasped, almost as if her own soul was trying to be ripped away from her own body. But she would not allow it. She hung onto it with all her might, and instead of being met with excruciating pain, she was introduced to complete darkness.

And somehow, she swore she saw her lover's figure blending in the night.

Marinette titled her head to the side. Was the ritual over? Was Chat Noir already healed and able to walk once again? She stood to her feet—only because he was gone from the place he was laid on before, and she had been kneeling by nothing now. Marinette looked from side to side and found nothing, but when she looked ahead in the darkness, she found Chat Noir's emerald, blazing eyes staring back at her.

"Chat Noir?" She called out, unsurely. She watched as his eyes blinked before they moved closer, and as his shadow approached her slowly, she was finally able to make out his figure in the pitch darkness. His eyes illuminated the little bit of space between them, and because of this, she was able to recognize the smile she had come to love so dearly.

"Marinette."

She threw herself into his arms and he caught her with brilliant ease. As they embraced, she felt his arms circle around her waist and pull her closer into him, and her arms only tightened around his neck. She buried her nose into his chest and inhaled, grateful that his scent remained the same. She wasn't sure what to make of this situation, and she had no idea where they were, but that hardly mattered when Chat Noir was standing before her, alive and well.

She pulled back only slightly to look up into his eyes. "You are standing on your own two feet," she breathed in relief, "And walking. Does this mean that the ritual has worked? That you will be well?"

Chat Noir's smile fell only slightly, and she felt his grip around her tighten, as if he were afraid that he would lose her again if he held on too loosely. "The ceremony has just begun, Marinette."

She leaned her forehead back against his chest and sighed deeply. "I don't understand."

"How did you get here?" Chat Noir asked instead, his voice rumbling throughout his chest and sending sparks of electricity into her own body. She tried not to shiver. Instead, she held onto him tighter, relieving herself in his scent.

"What do you mean?"

"It should be impossible for you to be here." He tried to explain. "During the ritual, this is where my conscious remains why the staff performs it's magic and takes it price. I should be the only one here."

"Perhaps it was because I was at your side when the ritual began." She said thoughtfully as she looked up at him again. "It seems as if I have travelled into your conscious. Weird, considering I have always wanted to read someone's thoughts."

He chuckled to that and shook his head, the smile on his lips surely returning. Finally, he released his lover and stepped back, offering her one his clawed hands instead. "Come with me. I want to show you something."

She took his hand without hesitance as Chat Noir began to lead her through the darkness. Marinette wasn't sure what he was expecting to show her, considering there was nothing to see, but she followed him nonetheless. She was only reminded that he was there whenever he would turn back to look at her, and his green eyes would lock on hers. It was the only source of comfort she had in the darkness.

And then suddenly, the hand in hers disappeared from her touch.

She gasped audibly and retracted her hand to her chest the moment Chat Noir's touch vanished. The darkness was so extreme that she could not even see her own hand in front of her face, and now that Chat Noir's glowing eyes had vanished, there was no way for her to illuminate her path.

Then, before she could call out for him again, the surroundings flashed white.

And somehow, she saw herself.

"What?" Marinette mumbled to herself in disbelief as she watched another figure—who shared her exact similarities—walk only a few feet ahead of her, completely oblivious to the fact that perhaps she had a double in play. Marinette could only stare; unsure of what to do or say. The only reason she had even recognized the figure as herself was because of the hood she had been wearing on the day of...

She gasped and covered her mouth with the palm of her hand. Good god, that had been the day she had first attempted to climb over the wall that separated her world and the forbidden forest from coexisting together.

It was a memory.

She watched herself kick the stone wall out of frustration, only for her past self to clutch her foot in agony once the stone met her fragile toes. Marinette cringed at the sight. That had surely been a stupid idea.

But then the memory changed, and Marinette was suddenly on the other side of the wall, watching the memory from a completely different view.

From Chat Noir's point of view.

She hadn't even been aware that he had seen her back then. But somehow, as she made a fool of herself, he watched her with curious, green eyes, even titling his head slightly when she had set her basket down on the ground and pouted at the wall. From his point of view, she realized the intense concentration and curiosity that had radiated from Chat Noir and how he almost longed to see more of her—even as the bells rang throughout the town and her past-self wandered back into the village. Marinette watched Chat noir's past-self as he tipped his chin to follow her with his eyes, even as her past-self vanished into the woods.

Marinette never knew she had been being watched that day. And she certainly had no idea Chat Noir had once been so curious. She had always assumed since their first encounter that he had just wanted to get rid of her.

The memory then faded into nothing but white again, and she blinked. It brought back another memory along with it, and she realized, that every single one she was being showed was one of Chat Noir's memories.

It began with her sitting on top of the wall, her legs dangled over the edge. She remembered that day all too clearly. It had been the first day she ever crossed into the forbidden forest, breaking every known law in her village that forbade anyone from crossing. She watched from Chat Noir's perspective as she pushed herself off the wall and landed in a squatted position, brown leaves squishing beneath her feet.

Chat noir moved after that, and she watched him kneel closely behind a bush. She was suddenly shown the look on his face, and what surprised her the most was the concern that clouded his features as he watched her. She didn't have a chance to fully decipher the look as the memory focused through his perspective again, and she watched her past self look up the moment she heard twigs snap beneath someone's foot and the bushes rustle as he moved.

That was when Chat Noir had emerged from the bushes.

She heard her past self ask him who he was, and for a second, Marinette could sense the hesitance Chat had once had before he replied. She couldn't help but giggle when Chat Noir suddenly jumped back in the memory, eyes widened as he pointed at her past self in disbelief and exclaimed in a mortified tone that she was human. But then again, hadn't he known that already? That wasn't their first encounter like Marinette had first thought, after all. Her thoughts were quickly interrupted when Chat's past-self cursed in his language, and she remembered the way he rolled his eyes whenever she had bugged him to tell her what it meant.

Even when he had been insistent on helping her climb back over the wall, she saw nothing in his expression that exemplified hatred for her kind. He wore a cautious expression back then, but the look in his eyes bore something of curiosity, fondness, and if she wasn't mistaken, love too.

But... perhaps Marinette was wrong. They had just met after all. How could Chat Noir love her then?

And then the memory showed the third time they had encountered one another. Chat Noir had been standing guard near the wall, only to watch with an exasperated expression as her past self basically threw herself over the wall. Marinette stifled a laugh. She watched the man she had come to love so much roll his eyes and when her eyes had fallen on him, he offered her a confused expression.

Back then, Chat Noir hadn't understood why she kept returning. And when he told her to stay away, Marinette hadn't understood why she kept coming back. It was almost as if she had been drawn to the place, or rather, someone specifically.

She remembered the odd look he gave her when he noticed her wearing men's clothing.

And then she saw the memory of when she returned to his world for the third time, where she realized the recklessness of her intrusion could have gotten her caught, had it not been for Chat Noir's incredible senses. He had noticed her there prior to her even seeing him and had directed his friends away before they realized a human had entered their world. From his perspective, Marinette could see the concern on Chat's face as he directed his friends in the opposite direction, and the exhale of relief he let out the moment he was for sure she was safe.

Marinette almost couldn't believe what she was seeing. She hadn't realized Chat Noir cared so much.

She remembered the heart attack he almost gave her when he suddenly pounced, and the look he offered her was none but one of annoyance. But then, he had noticed she was bleeding, and his look softened into one of concern.

How could she not have realized sooner that Chat Noir had cared so much about her since the very beginning?

He had smiled then, big and wide, and had introduced himself because it seemed he had given up on trying to keep her away. Marinette watched the two past figures of themselves shake hands, indicating the start of a blossoming friendship, before the memory faded again into the next one.

The next memory began with her and Chat Noir sitting together in the brown leaves, their backs resting against the stone wall that separated their two worlds. Marinette watched their past-selves argue for a few minutes over why her past-self should have lied about who had given her the arrowhead, and although Marinette had been able to hear their voices before in the previous memories, she heard Chat Noir's words louder than the rest for the first time in this one.

"Either way, you have already betrayed your sister's trust." He had told her, his expression closed off and neutral. This time, however, Marinette was not able to see the situation through his perspective—only as a spectator herself—and she could not help but wonder why. "Trust me. When we dare to create mischief behind someone's back, we have already betrayed their trust. There is a reason why secrets on this side of the wall are known as demons themselves."

Back then, Marinette hadn't understood fully what he meant. But now it all made so much sense. Chat Noir had referred to secrets as 'demons' because it was impossible to keep one from his father, the King himself.

Chat Noir's past-self frowned into his lap. "Yet, every time we have met, I continue to keep a secret. And one day, this demon will catch me for my wrongdoings. And everyone will know of my sin."

Marinette gasped and lifted the palms of her hands to her lips. The demon had caught up to him. Was this the reason why he was in the predicament that he was in now?

Was Chat Noir being punished for keeping their friendship a secret?

Was this all her fault? All because she had been a bit selfish?

Marinette felt a hand to her shoulder, and she whipped around to find Chat Noir again—this time perfectly clear in her view, surrounded by the almost blinding white light. He was wearing the widest smile, even though he had just witnessed the painful memory beside her, and his emerald, cat-like eyes bore into hers as he said, "None of this is your fault, Marinette."

As she turned to embrace him, tears wet in her eyes, his figure vanished into thin air again, and she was left alone as the pervious memory faded along with him, allowing the next one to appear.

The next memory, however, pained her to watch.

It showed Chat Noir who stood before his father and the throne, wearing the most distraught expression she had ever seen. The memory showed that her scent had been detected by one of the scouts, and to keep her from getting discovered, Chat Noir had pretended to be oblivious to the situation. She watched father and son dispute on the issue, until Chat Noir turned away, clearly guilt wrecked for lying.

And then she saw another memory of Chat Noir and his father flash before her eyes, and in it, she watched as they argued back and forth between one another. The King wanted his son to marry a woman he had chosen for the sake of the kingdom, but Chat Noir had refused, stating that he only wanted to marry for love—a situation she and him were both placed in unwillingly.

And then, what saddened her the most is when her lover stormed out of the palace, distraught and unsure of what to do. Chat Noir's past self marched into the darkness feeling alone, lost, and desperate for another's company on the same night she had run away for similar reasons. Somehow, fate had brought them together in that way.

Some of the other memories—like when Chat Noir had walked in on her changing—had her laughing beyond control, especially when she was able to see just how embarrassed he had been compared to her. Others made her concerned when she could see though Chat Noir's perspective and realize that he had been stalking the forests to protect her, when Nathaniel had first been a threat. Some even made her smile widely, for those were the ones she had pushed so far back into her mind that she had forgotten.

On memory, however, made her blink in surprise.

"You... want to go on a picnic with me?" This was a memory she remembered like none other. Chat Noir had returned one morning and was ecstatic to take her on a picnic, his awkward self-rocking back and forth on his heals as she stood on the other side of his bed, already dressed in one of her casual dresses. She had remembered feeling awkward then, and she could only imagine now what he must have felt.

"Yes," He said, and then blinked once. "Did you not want a tour of the forest?"

"You know," Chat Noir suddenly said beside her, and this time, his unannounced presence did not frighten her as much. Instead, Marinette turned her eyes away from the memory, and when she saw her lover once again by her side, he was watching the memory with a fond smile on his lips. "That was the best day of my life."

"Really?" She asked him disbelieved. "It was a bit of a sad day as well."

He turned his head to look at her, his smile still prominent. "Not for me. I got to spend the entire afternoon with you, after all. How could that possibly make any day sad?"

She searched his eyes in awe, unsure of how to respond. Chat Noir was quite bold in his conscience.

"One day," His voice was gentle and unwavering as he turned to look back at the memory. "I wish to spend every minute of every day like that with you. Perhaps, I shall get that chance when I am well once again."

And then everything faded into nothing but white, and Marinette sprung awake.

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