It's been two years since Jungkook died. Jimin can still hear his laugh in the dead of night, his voice whispering the sweet words into the golden hue of the morning sunrise casted upon their skins, cuddled up together in their shared bed.

Jungkook loved flowers. Jimin can never forget how Jungkook always smelled of flowers ever since they began dating. It was such a floral yet sweet scent, almost like vanilla. When Jimin asked Jungkook why he smelled as such, Jungkook gave him a soft giggle and told him that it was his favorite flower: heliotropes. Jimin remembers him talking about his advanced knowledge in flowers, and how his dream was to open his own florist's shop. One year - and lots of saving - later, Jimin remembers being shaken awake from a nap, opening his eyes in a panic. Jungkook had the largest grin on his face, straddled and hovering over Jimin. He remembers how his face glowed with excitement, stating that he had saved enough to open his shop. The two went to eat Jungkook's favorite meal, Jimin's treat.

Jimin can still feel the dip in the bed where Jungkook slept. Just before bed, he'd stare at Jimin, his lips turned up at the corner just slightly. He always had the most beautiful galaxies trapped in his eyes, even when the light from the lamp couldn't reach. Jimin would caress his cheek using his knuckles, and every single time without fail, Jungkook would turn and kiss his knuckles. They'd look at each other, eyes soft, and Jimin would always say "I'll see you in the morning." When the galaxy eyes closed and eventually fell asleep, Jimin would always sit and watch the rise and fall of his lover's chest. With his love in the same bed, Jungkook would bring warmth to the room, both emotionally and physically. Jungkook's skin was like a summer glow, and radiated such a perfect heat to keep them both warm throughout the night. Instead, the room is cold - grey and lifeless around him. Jimin runs his hand over Jungkook's side of the mattress, feeling just the softest of ridges making the bed cave. He never touches the pillows in fear that maybe, just maybe, he'd feel his husband's lips along his knuckles. The last heliotrope-scented pillowcase sits neatly folded in a box at the top of his closet, never to be touched.

The bedroom gets too quiet late at night. The coldness of the room surrounds him too harshly, and the only form of solace Jimin gets is by rolling the other way and curling in on himself. When he closes his eyes, he can still hear the soft breaths of his lover next to him. He can begin to feel the warmth against his back, the dip in the bed ever so prominent. With his eyes closed, he can pretend everything is still the way it was. When his eyes open, the warmth vanishes, the air silent around him save for the passing cars down below and the heavy winds rapping against his window. He closes his eyes and attempts to sleep, pretending that warmth is still close enough to him to reach in and cuddle to. But it's too cold; too far away to keep him warm in the warmthless room. He sits up and pulls the bottle of sleeping pills out of his nightstand. With half a pill swallowed, he manages to slip into the unnerving abyss of sleep in the early hours of the night.

When he wakes up, Jimin stares out the window; stares at the golden sun he has come to hate. Golden rays that would never carry the hushed words of "good morning, my love" again. His body feels light, yet too heavy to move away from this just barely comfortable enough spot. The mattress that once felt like clouds now feels as hard as jagged rocks. The clock beside him reads out the time: 6:43am. He managed to sleep for two hours, and that is considered a victory nowadays. He managed to lug himself out of bed, his body so heavy that his feet feel weighted by blocks of cement. He's exhausted - but exhaustion is so set into his everyday life that he's become numb to the feeling. The cold air nips at his skin, the floor ice cold underneath his bare feet. Jungkook always preferred the cold.

He forces himself to eat - Jungkook would always scold him when he would miss a meal before dance practice. He would always want Jimin to stay as healthy as possible. It's just some toast with some jam on it, but it would've been enough to satisfy his husband. He remembers the first time he ever saw Jungkook. He was practicing the routine himself and Hoseok had choreographed for the team for the upcoming dance competition, his friend alongside him while the rest of the students sat along the wall on break. It was a mix of ballet and contemporary, and Jimin couldn't get one specific move down. His cheeks were red, his hair messy and drenched in sweat along his forehead. Hoseok called for one more round. He nodded, letting his orange hair at the time bounce along the top of his head, and moved to the first position. Before the music could start, the front door opens, and in comes a boy, not much younger-looking than himself, carrying a large bouquet of flowers. He's looking around shyly, but Jimin doesn't pay much attention.

"May we help you?" Hoseok speaks up, piquing Jimin's interest. What he turns to see is a tall male, maybe three or four inches taller than himself, dressed in an oversized jean jacket, black jeans, a white tee, and a beige beanie on top of golden blonde hair. He's got the fairest skin, dark brown eyes that even from here, Jimin could see the galaxy in them, along with a cute rounded nose. The boy stands frozen for a moment, taken slightly off guard at the sudden interaction. "I was wondering if there was a Lee Soojin here? She has a bouquet of flowers delivered to her." The girl in question wasn't there today, she had a stomach bug, and Jimin voiced as such. When the boy looked at Jimin, he watched as the boy's eyes widened just slightly, his toes slowly facing one another. "I'll take them for now and bring them by her apartment on my way out." Jimin smiles, walking over to the boy and reaching out for the flowers, but the boy seemed so frozen in place, staring at Jimin.

Slowly, he lowered his hand. He didn't want to just reach out and take the flowers from him. That would be rude. Jimin looked into the boy's eyes, smiling at how he immediately blushed under Jimin's gaze. He lifted his hand and waved it in front of the boy's eyes. "Hello?" The boy jumped, blinking rapidly, before suddenly speaking very fast. "My Jungkook is name!" Jimin's eyebrows raised, his smile widening. In a quick second, the boy's face flushed red, takes one step back, hands the flowers to Jimin very quickly, then bows to the room and rushes out. Jimin just giggles, staring at the door for a little longer than he should've.

Over the next few days, Lee Soojin would 'get flowers delivered to her' once a day. Given, they made Soojin very happy, and Jimin was getting quite the entertainment watching Jungkook get flustered when seeing him, when one day he never showed up. It made Jimin slightly sad, but he guessed it was bound to happen after a while. What he wasn't expecting, however, was to run into him on the way out of the studio. The boy sat out front, his back facing the door, staring up at the sky since it had gotten dark outside. Jimin hadn't noticed him, but one of the other girls from the dance class tapped his arm and pointed to him. Jimin's eyes widened for a second, before smiling softly. His dancemates pushed him to talk to Jungkook, and after a moment, he finally began walking to the boy. "Jungkook." He calls, a smile on his face. The boy jumps, quickly turning to Jimin, a blush rising on his cheeks that was so prominent even in the dark. The boy's mouth opens and closes, trying to find words to say but inevitably failing. Jimin just giggles softly, his eyes turning into crescent moons. "My Jimin is name." The smile that Jimin received was the most beautiful smile he'd ever seen, completed with two goofy bunny teeth.

The two of them actually got along really well, and Jungkook would always visit Jimin during practice. Jimin found out that Jungkook was a delivery boy for a local florist and although he was paid alright, he didn't want to be a delivery boy in the near future. His feelings grew for Jungkook quite quickly, but Jungkook would never give any hints that he was feeling the same. Jimin thought he was being foolish for falling for Jungkook. Maybe Jungkook didn't like Jimin romantically once he found out his personality.

Until the night of his big competition.

Each of the groups had performed, and of course, their performance had gone without a single hitch. His dancemates and himself gripped each other's hands for dear life, and the entire stadium was dead silent. Jimin prayed harder than he ever had, their eyes closed and eyebrows furrowed, sweat clinging their hair to their foreheads. Jimin could hear each of their pleas under their breaths, beggin whatever God was out there to let them win this competition.

In a split second decision, Jimin opened his eyes and looked out into the crowd, his eyes immediately landing on Jungkook, hands clasped together in front of his face, eyes squeezed together. His heart softened, pulling a grin so wide. Time slowed, and it was like everything was happening in slow-mo right in front of his eyes. In the first moments, his teammates began to jump and scream, confetti was shot out of cannons, letting it rain on top of them. Jimin watched as Jungkook shot out of his chair, a loud holler of excitement making his throat strain. When time seemed to speed up again, it was from Hoseok shaking the breathing soul out of him, snapping him out of his gaze. He laughs loudly, screaming at the top of his lungs, jumping in excitement with Hoseok and the rest of his teammates. Soon, Jimin and Hoseok are being pushed by the rest of the team to accept the trophy, the large piece of metal being lifted high in the air.

Jimin looks down once more to Jungkook, who was staring right back at him, the largest smile on his face. But his eyes... Oh, his eyes. His eyes held the entire universe in them, and that universe was staring only at him.

After everything had shut down, Jimin trudges tiredly out to Hoseok's car, his bag over his shoulder that carried his performance outfit. However, outside, stood Jungkook carrying a large bouquet of random flowers. Jimin's smile grew tenfold, picking up his pace to run over, immediately wrapping his arms around Jungkook's neck and hugging him tightly. "You did absolutely amazing out there tonight, Jimin. Your choreography was beautiful!" Jungkook smiles down at him. "Thank you, Jungkook. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Are those for me?" He jumps for a moment before nodding and handing Jimin the large bouquet. "Oh, Jungkookie... These are gorge-"

"Will you go on a date with me, Park Jimin?" Jimin's eyes widened, caught off guard by the question. He stared at Jungkook's face, searching for any hesitation that wasn't shyness. He feels the smile grow on his face before he tells his body to. "I'd love to, Jeon Jungkook."

Jimin no longer dances. He doesn't have the same passion he had before.

Their apartment hasn't changed one bit since Jungkook passed. Every single thing was still placed exactly how it was since the last time his husband had walked through it, down to the haphazard way the throw pillows were laid two years ago. Maybe it wasn't very hygienic to leave everything the way it was, but Jimin remembered to dust everything now and again when he had the energy to. It was like living in a photograph of Jungkook's last day, right down to the small amount of blood staining the rug underneath the couch. Jimin didn't want to change a single thing about it.

In the bathroom, all of Jungkook's products stayed right where they were left, right down to the purple toothbrush laying in the cup. It's disgusting, but Jimin refuses to move anything. He grabs his own toothbrush and toothpaste, shoving the brush into his mouth. When he looks back in the mirror, he sees himself and Jungkook, bright and happy, smiling at each other through the mirror while they brush their teeth. He leans down to spit, and when he comes back up, he's staring back at his reflection, the one without Jungkook beside him. His lips are chapped, hair grown out much longer than it's supposed to. It almost looks like a mullet, but he hasn't had the energy to go out and get it cut. His skin is paler, and under his eyes are dark purple bags. Thankfully, he has full-coverage makeup to cover up his feelings. Hell, he even throws in some eyeliner with it. Lastly, he throws his hair up into some form of a ponytail, just the long black bangs out. Little baby hairs at the base of his neck stick out, but he didn't care enough to fix them. Good enough. Deep down, however, he can still see the dark circles and chapped, torn apart lips. No amount of makeup would cover the pain he felt.

Jungkook's clothes are still in the closet. Most of them have lost their beautiful heliotrope scent, but Jimin still holds the cuff of the last item of clothing in the far corner of the closet that holds his beautiful scent: the white, button down shirt that Jungkook had worn to propose to Jimin, along with to their wedding. The damned shirt is still in perfect condition, except for the one button that had popped off during their honeymoon. They never replaced it; Jungkook had always said that it would be a nice memory down the line. Boy, was he right. But Jimin never knew that nice memories could hurt this much.

Jimin works in the same floral shop that Jungkook created. When he passed, the ownership was handed to Jimin since they were close enough in marital status. It hurt so much to be there every day, but he'd be damned if he ever let this shop go. Jungkook worked too hard for it to all go to waste. He remembers the day it opened; Jimin was of course invited to the unveiling, and so, Jungkook, wearing his white button down and jean combo, covered Jimin's eyes with his hands for the surprise, keeping them across the street from the building. He remembers Jungkook telling him not to open his eyes until he told him so, and Jimin did as he was told. When he opened his eyes, there was Jungkook, displayed on one knee, holding open a box with a beautiful silver band covered in diamonds. Jimin immediately gasped, his hands coming up to cover his mouth. "J-Jungkook? You can't joke about things like this..." Jungkook just laughed. "Park Jimin, we've been together for almost four years. You support me through anything and everything no matter how crazy the idea is. You were the most beautiful person I'd ever laid my eyes on when I first saw you, sweat stuck to your forehead with a red face from dancing, and you are still the most beautiful person to exist in my life, always have been through all of my past lives, and will always be through all of my future lives." Jimin's crying by this point, almost curling in on himself as Jungkook speaks. "Park Jimin," Jungkook reaches out and holds his hand, while Jimin's other is furiously wiping tears away from his face, "I would say that you would make me the happiest man in the world, but I already am, just being with you every day and hearing your beautiful voice or just seeing your smile. Would you do me the honor of becoming my husband?"

A crowd had formed around them, considering they were just out in the open, but neither of them cared. "Oh my god, you dork! Of course I will!" Within an instant, Jungkook was up on two feet, picking Jimin off the ground, hugging him so tight that he almost couldn't breathe. When Jungkook eventually let him down onto his two feet, he asked the constructors to finally remove the sheet covering the sign. Above the doorways laid a beautiful sign, carved from wood and probably costing a fortune, read Jeon's Garden.

Jimin stares at the sign from across the street, in the same place he was all those years ago. The paint has begun to chip away, but he doesn't have the money to correct it. He never would have the money.

When he walks inside the shop, he's greeted by one of the workers, a young man named Choi Soobin. He bows in return to him without saying a word, walking back into his office. It's mostly empty in here, the walls a light yellow color. Along the back wall is a large bookshelf, filled with binders that he doesn't touch. In the middle, there's a large desk. There's nothing in it, nothing inside it. Jimin sets his jacket and bag on the desk, before looking over to the coathanger where his apron lays. It's purple, Jungkook's favorite color. He shoves it over his head, his grey shirt hugging his chest underneath, tying it in the back. Jimin has to take a deep breath before he can walk out and face society. He gets the order list from Soobin for the day, looking it over quickly before getting to work. Behind him, he can hear the bell on the door ring again and again. He doesn't bother paying attention unless he's called. It's unfortunate when he suddenly is. "Jimin-ssi..." Soobin calls, and Jimin turns, facing the customer.

It's a regular, a sweet old man who he's grown fond of over time, even if he didn't know his name. "Oh, Jimin-ssi! It's nice seeing you again!" Jimin gives him a small smile and a nod. "You as well, sir. What can I do for you?" The old man smiles a large, sweet smile. "Well, my wife was walking through a garden a few days ago and saw a flower she adores. I wanted to see if you had them and get a bouquet of them if you do." Jimin nods as he listens to him, before nodding fully. "Do you know the name of the flower?" The man gazes off for a moment, before suddenly perking up.

"Heliotropes, I believe they were called!"

Jimin's smile falters, just the slightest. His stomach turns underneath his skin.

"We sure do, sir. What size bouquet would you like?" He keeps the fake smile on his face, having perfected it after this long. He takes the man's order and sets off to work. The flower in question stares him dead in the eye while he works, the sweet smell making his stomach turn further against its confines. He loved the smell of heliotropes, yet hated it because it wasn't where he wanted the source of the smell to come from.

He forced the vomit back down his throat while bringing the bouquet to the man. He decided at that moment that he hated him, hated that he would be bringing back the flowers that meant everything to him back to his wife of however many tens of years who just now found the beautiful flowers. Hated that he couldn't do the same. Jimin let Soobin ring him up, he needed to use the restroom and fast. Fortunately for him, the vomit reached his mouth right as he leaned over the toilet. It would've felt better if he had eaten more, maybe. It burned his throat all the same, anyways. Flush the problems away for now. He raises to his feet, standing in front of the sink. He turns on the water, letting it run over his hands for a moment before cupping it and sucking it into his mouth, followed by a spit into the sink.

He let the water run over his hands for much longer than he probably meant to. But it felt so nice against his skin. It reminded him of how gently Jungkook would always touch him, gentle like touching a flower petal that was close to drying out. For their first kiss, he remembers how gentle Jungkook's hands were on him, holding his face just along his jaw, wrapping around under his ear to the base of his skull. How Jungkook had turned his face to the perfect angle, how his lips slotted perfectly along the seams of his own. He was just as gentle the first time they made love; how he touched every intimate part of him with the most utmost care, yet so passionately caressed. Jungkook's hands were so soft. His lips were much softer.

Jimin can feel the tears begin to well up in his eyes. In the hall, Soobin can hear the soft whimpers. Jimin cries so hard, yet so quietly, he ends up throwing up all over again. Nothing comes up.

He closes the store early that day, promising Soobin to still pay him for his whole shift. In his bag lies a carefully wrapped bundle of heliotropes.

The city is grey from inside the bus. It seemed to be greyer since Jungkook passed. Maybe the world was just as sad he was gone as Jimin was. A young couple sits across the row from him, and immediately remembers when him and Jungkook sat next to each other on their first date. Jungkook stared down at him, smiling slightly. Jimin, however, was looking out the window, watching the cars as they passed. They were going to the fair, Jimin remembers. In the reflection of the window, he could see Jungkook staring at him fondly, and before Jungkook realizes Jimin can see him, he giggles out a "You're cute, you know." When Jimin turns back to the other, Jungkook blushes just enough to reach his ears. "W-Why do you say that?" He smiles at Jimin. "Because I can see when you stare at me with those beautiful eyes of yours."

When the two arrived at the fair, Jungkook had already gripped Jimin's hand, tugging him off to random play areas. It was mainly that for most of the night, riding on roller coasters and eating popcorn, before Jungkook suggested they ride the ferris wheel as the last ride before they left. Jimin eagerly agreed. It took a little while, but right before they reached the top, Jungkook went silent, closing his eyes and breathing out. "Jungkook? You okay?" Jimin leaned down slightly, trying to see his face. Without opening his eyes, Jungkook began to speak. "Jimin-hyung... I've been trying all night to ask you, and I thought this would be the best place to ask..." He suddenly opens his eyes and turns his full body to Jimin. They were stopped at the very top, the moon lighting up their little pod perfectly. Jungkook had the silhouette of the moonlight behind him, and he looked stunning in that moment,  He looked into Jungkook's eyes, and there they were. The beautiful galaxy that was meant for him and him only. "Can I kiss you?"

The corner of Jimin's lips tilted up into a smile just slightly, staring into those beautiful galaxies he loved so much. Instead of answering, Jimin leaned in, giving him the smallest of all pecks against his lips. For a moment, Jungkook was frozen. Just for a moment, Jimin could hear his heart in his ears. Only a moment before Jungkook leaned in, his hand perfectly slotting along Jimin's jaw, underneath his ear, cradling the base of Jimin's skull and slotting their lips together. Jimin was the first to open his lips, and it wasn't long after that Jungkook had as well. For just a moment, Jimin had reached paradise.

Jimin quickly apologized to the young couple for staring at them.

When he gets off the bus, it's like his feet are on autopilot. His feet knew the exact route through the tens of rows, walking through aisles and aisles before slowly coming to a stop. The sun was setting in front of him, but he wasn't paying any mind. He sat on the ground, and looked to the grey slab labeled Jeon Jungkook in front of him. He gave the softest of smiles, before turning to his bag and pulling out the bundle of heliotropes. "Hello, my love. I'm sorry it's been a few days. I couldn't seem to get out of bed.. But, I forced myself. I know you don't like it when I skip meals, and I'm making sure your flower shop is being taken care of." He places the flowers along the bottom of the gravestone, yet doesn't look up for a little while after.

"It's been so hard, Jungkookie..." He feels a tear fall down his cheek. "Today marks two years since you've been home. I kept hearing that it'd get better, but when would that be? Honestly," He chuckles out a wet huff of laughter, "I think it's only gotten harder. I can never sleep without you in the same bed." He finally raises his eyes to the slab, giving a small smile. "I brought you your favorites... Heliotropes. The regular we always had, the old man... He came in today and bought a bouquet of them for his wife. I ended up crying in the bathroom." He sniffs, wiping some tears from under his eye and along his cheek. "I would give anything to see you again, my love."

He remembers the day Jungkook was buried. Everyone was dressed in all black, himself dressed in some black slacks and a black button down that Taehyung had shoved him into. He hadn't spoken since the day he found Jungkook. His eyes were void of all life, and any tears he had were cried out. His tear ducts were empty. His skin shined pale through any makeup Taehyung had put on his face, and Jimin just felt so numb that he just let Taehyung do whatever he wanted. The car ride over to the gravesite was quiet, Jimin's hand limp in Taehyung's. When they stopped, Jimin stepped out of the car and just walked forwards. If anyone was talking to him, he couldn't hear it. He zoned out everyone's voices. Above the dug out grave laid Jungkook's coffin, Jungkook himself inside dressed in some tux that Namjoon had found online, hair styled perfectly. Jimin walked up to it, staring at the dark, polished wood lined with silver. The other guests surrounded the casket, some around Jimin himself to try to give their condolences, but Jimin was solely focused on the casket in front of him. The minister began to speak, talking about Jungkook as if the man personally knew him. But no one would ever know Jungkook like Jimin did. While the man was talking, Jimin moved to be on the side of the casket, slowly reaching out and laying his hand gently on the top of the casket. Nobody made a move to stop him. Jimin kept his hand on the casket for as long as he could, feeling the cool wood be moved away from his palm as it was lowered into the ground.

Jimin was numb. So, very numb. Everyone threw flowers into the grave, and when it came time for Jimin to throw his own, he looked down at his hand to see the beautiful petals of the heliotrope. Jimin was the only one here who knew that the vanilla scent Jungkook had always worn was not some perfume, but rather his favorite flower. Jimin would always be the only one.

When people started to file away, ready to return back to their everyday lives, Jimin stood there, staring down into the hole filled with flowers. Seokjin walks up to Jimin, wrapping an arm around him. He could feel the puffs of air against his cheek when Seokjin talked, but Jimin couldn't hear anything. All he could hear was his heart in his ears. He wished it was the same as before. Slowly, Seokjin lifted Jimin's hand that carried the flower, holding it out and over the casket. Jimin watched the flower for a minute, the blue-ish grey colored sky surrounding every edge of each petal.

Jimin let go of the flower, watching it fall into the casket.

He stood still, his body frozen. With the flower now out of his fingers, a wave of emotion hit him harder than any train going full speed. He felt as if throwing in the flower solidified his husband's death as if watching him be wheeled out in a black bag hadn't before. His lip trembled, just barely, for just a mere millisecond. But once it started, it didn't stop. One tear down his cheek led to two, two into four, four into eight. Soft whimpers turned into sobs, sobs turned into screams. His knees buckled underneath his weight, and the others ran to his side, each trying to comfort him in some way. He remembers his hearing coming back, listening to his own screams for his husband that sounded like incoherent babbles to the people around him. But one sentence stuck out that he felt like he needed to scream as loud as he could.

"HIS FAVORITE FLOWERS ARE HELIOTROPES!"

Jimin stares down at the gravestone in front of him. His tears had dried up, but his nose was still slightly runny. He stands to his feet, brushes any stray blades of grass off his butt, then picks up his bag, hanging it on his shoulder. "I love you, Jeon Jungkook. I always will." He pushes his fingers to poonched lips, then lays them on the stone. "I'll see you in the morning, baby."

By the time he arrives home, he just wants a bath and to go to sleep, even though it probably wouldn't happen for much longer than the night before. He doesn't even get his key in the door when he receives a text from Taehyung.

"You should come over. I know you need the alcohol in your system."

Jimin reads through the text a second time, before lifting his head and lowering his phone. His thoughts run for a moment, before swallowing on air and pulling his phone back up.

"I'm on my way."

When Taehyung opens the door, he has a smile on his face. Jimin gives him his best fake smile he can. "I'm glad you came, Jimin. I was just grabbing drinks. Anything specific you want?" Jimin shakes his head softly, and Taehyung just nods in response. "Well, the others are in the living room, go ahead and join them." He nods again and begins walking. When he reaches the living room, everyone is laughing with each other about something that Jimin didn't know. He walks a little farther in, and catches Yoongi's eye. "Jimin!" He says with a smile.

Everyone smiles at him, but he realized their previous conversation immediately stopped when he was noticed, like they didn't want him hearing. He could read the pity smiles on their faces, trying to pretend to be happy while he was around. Jimin wondered what it was like to be happy at a time like this. "You came." Seokjin stands, walking over to give him a hug, one that he loosely returns. It's not the person he wants to hug. He gives them all a convincing fake smile, the one he'd perfected. "I was promised free booze." He chuckles. It sounded empty, even to himself. "Well, I'm happy you're here." Namjoon smiles from the recliner to the left of the couch. Seokjin returned back to his seat on a cushion on the floor. Hoseok sat on the far right of the couch, and Yoongi resided in the loveseat to the right of the couch. "Come sit down!" Hoseok pats the couch next to him, and Jimin just nods, taking off his jacket and laying it along the back of the couch.

"So, how've you been? I feel like I haven't seen you in forever." Hoseok smiles, the heart-shaped lips showing perfectly straight teeth. "Good, I guess. I'm struggling with the flower shop, but I'm getting through it." He smiles through his lie. "Well, I'm glad to hear you're doing good, Jiminnie." Yoongi says, smiling at him. "I feel like we never see you anymore." Jimin shrugs softly, chuckling. "Been busy with work."

Taehyung returns from the kitchen with six glasses in his hand and between his arm and chest, a bottle of some cheap red wine in the other hand. He remembers when Taehyung would bring seven. Stop it, Jimin. He doesn't want to ruin the night for the others. "So, Hobi-hyung." He calls out, leaning over to pick up one of the glasses of freshly poured wine, "How's the dance studio?" He takes a sip, and it burns, his throat raw from crying most of the day. Hoseok smiles at him, giving that enthusiastic smile he always has. "It's great! We have so many dedicated newcomers recently. It's beautiful to see how hard they work."

Jimin, for once, truly smiles, although weakly. "I miss the dance studio." He lies through his teeth. The only thing he misses about the studio is the days when Jungkook would come to see him. Hoseok gives him his award-winning smile, but Jimin can still see the pity laced in between each tooth. "You could always come back and join us, Jiminnie. We're looking for another dance teacher if you're interested." Jimin's smile falters, but he doesn't let it show. He waves him off with a fake chuckle. "Ah, hyung. You know I can't." Taehyung leans down and pours wine in a glass. "Well, the offer is always there for you." Hoseok gives him a soft chuckle, and the conversation ends.

Jimin leans over and picks up the glass in front of him, filled with a beautiful deep red wine. He used to love the stuff, but now when he takes a sip, it burns his throat. He clears his throat, trying to help the burn subside. "So, what's the occasion for the get-together? Something eventful happen?"

The room grows quiet, the only noise being the air conditioner whirring in the background. Some of them eye their drinks, while others look between themselves. Jimin's stomach turns, just the slightest. Yoongi finally speaks up when he realizes nobody else would've. "We just didn't want you to be alone tonight, Jimin. We know today is a hard day."

Any light left in Jimin's eyes drained, not that there was much left anyways. His smile drops, just for a second before being picked back up, forcefully. Weakly. His shoulders slouch just the smallest bit, his hands now not knowing where to sit casually. "I appreciate it, everyone. But I'm fine." The lie feels sour on his tongue. He should've known this was going to happen, honestly. His friends did this the year before, and the couch he was on now was the same couch he had slept on for months after Jungkook passed. They were always there for him.

"Jimin..." Namjoon speaks up, but Jimin waves a hand before he can say anything else. "I'm fine, hyung! Seriously!" He hopes the fake smile is convincing enough for them to drop the subject. Seokjin stares him in his eyes from beside Namjoon. "Jimin, we can see the dark circles under your eyes. You're much thinner than you used to be, your hair is down to your shoulders, and I can see from here that you've been chewing at your lips." Jimin's smile falls. "The light that was once in your eyes left the same day he passed, and it hasn't been back since." Seokjin speaks softly, concern laced through his voice. He shouldn't be allowed to talk about Jungkook.

"We think," Taehyung speaks, finally, "it's time you look into getting help for your grieving process." Jimin doesn't turn his head, but his eyes look to Taehyung, who's bottom lip was tugged in between his teeth. Taehyung always did that when his anxiety was bad, ever since they were in junior high. He turns his head to Taehyung, reaching up and using his thumb to coax the lip from its abused placement. Jimin smiles, just the slightest upturn of his lips. "I'm not grieving." is all he says. "Jimin..." Hoseok speaks, but he interupts. "I'm not grieving. I've looked into the grieving process, and this isn't it." He swallows before continuing, looking into Seokjin's eyes. "When the most important thing is ripped from your hands and all you're left with is memories and the materialistic objects that once meant nothing, it suddenly means everything." He turns to Hoseok, looking at him for a mere moment before turning his eyes down to his lap. "You're left with the memories of what was, and those materialistic objects, like the dip in the bed or a simple white tee-shirt... You can't touch them without feeling every single emotion possible."

He turns and looks at Taehyung once more. "I'm not grieving. I'm just wishing the things that were left behind were the person who left them."

Yoongi speaks, and Jimin raises his head. "We know, Min... It's just, we're worried for you." He swallows, his throat feeling tight. His eyes were beginning to water, and he could feel his stomach turning once more. "I know you are, all of you. And I appreciate it, really. But I've tried to get help, and nothing works. The sleeping medicine the doctor gave me gives me nightmares, but if I don't take them, I don't sleep at all. I tried seeing a therapist, but they just didn't understand. No matter what I do..." He pauses as he feels a tear fall against his nose, swallows, then speaks again. "Everyone tells me that it'll get better, but it's been two years. Two years since that beautiful heliotrope scent was taken away from me. Two years since I last saw the galaxies in his eyes. I began to believe that the things people say about losing the person you love is utter bullshit."

He leans away when Taehyung tries to hug him. "Everywhere I go, I'm reminded of him and it makes everything so much harder. When I'm at work, I see his dazzling smile when he wraps a bouquet of tulips. When I'm around you all, I remember when we would all sit around, exactly like this, and we'd play games, calling him out on his very obvious cheating skills. When I look in the mirror, I see him smiling back at me like he had never left. But then I blink, and what was once a warm home filled with sun and love turns into a house, cold and lonely and unforgiving." He sighs softly, fixing his bangs out of his face.

"I'm just so... tired." He looks around at his friends, whose smiles had been wiped clean and were either looking at him with tears in their eyes or at the floor, or their drinks. He takes another sip of his wine that burns his throat, before standing. "I think I'm going to head home. I hope to see you again soon." He gives a soft smile, picking up his bag and jacket before leaving. No one says a word. No one bothers to get up as he leaves.

When he gets home, he can feel the life drain from his body. He drops his keys by the door, not bothering to lock it. He kicks off his shoes haphazardly, drops his jacket right where he stood.

The apartment may look the same, but the cold in the air drains any life that was left in it. His eyes sweep over the apartment, before landing on the stain at the edge of the carpet, right under the couch, a mere twenty feet from where he was standing now. He felt his head begin to spin where he stood, memories he hated beginning to flood into his head. He tried shaking his head to ground himself, but his vision kept swimming. His stomach twisted painfully; he could feel the bile raising up his throat. The sight of seeing the door hung open, the door frame cracked and hanging where the door latched closed - it made his chest tighten.

"Sleep." Sleep would make it all go away.

He stumbled into the kitchen, pulling out his spare bottle of sleeping pills, quickly pulling out a bottle of water. He swallowed a whole pill, chasing it with water. His head still spun, his eyes filling with tears inhibiting his ability to see. He remembered the sight of his husband, laying on the floor in front of the front door, head flopped to the side, laid in a pool of his own blood.

Jimin quickly swallowed another pill.

He remembered the air being hot, much too hot for either of their likings. Like Hell itself had come to inhabit their apartment.

Another pill.

He remembered running to his husband, staring down at the singular stab wound, long and so deep that his shirt went into the wound.

Another pill.

He remembered sitting in the pool of blood, letting it stain his own clothing. He remembered lifting his husband's head to lay in his own lap.

Another pill.

He remembered checking for a pulse against the pale that replaced the beautiful golden skin. He remembered the relief he felt when he felt the beating heart under his fingers.

Another pill.

He remembered screaming for help as loud as he could. He also remembered no one coming for six full minutes.

Another pill.

He remembered looking down at his husband's face, watching his eyes, still filled with galaxies, flutter open slowly. He remembered the smile his husband gave him.

Another pill.

"Is it bad?" Jungkook asked, people filing into the apartment. He remembers the tears that fell onto his husband's face. "Stay with me, Jungkook. Help will be here soon." He said through tears as one of the neighbors spoke with the police.

Another pill.

He remembered having to slap his husband to keep him awake for as long as possible.

Another pill.

He remembered Jungkook looking him in the eyes, a small smile on his lips. "I'll see you in the morning, my love."

Another pill.

He remembered how he watched the life leave those beautiful galaxy eyes.

Another pill.

He remembered dropping his husband's head to the floor as he turned to his side, picking Jungkook's upper half up to hold him tight to his chest, as if it'd bring him back.

Another pill.

He remembered screaming his husband's name as loud as he could, scaring the people around him.

Another pill.

He remembered the paramedics getting there just after.

Another pill.

He remembered the paramedics having to pry Jungkook out of his arms.

Another pill.

He remembered being asked if there was anyone they could call for him. He just threw his phone at them.

Another pill.

He remembered Jungkook being carried out in a black bag.

He reached for another pill, but found the bottle empty.

Jimin just smiled, giving a small chuckle, wet from his tears. "I guess I'm able to sleep now." He carried the bottle about halfway to his room, before dropping it. His body was beginning to become numb. This just made his smile larger.

He entered the bedroom and stripped off all clothing except his underwear. Opening the closet, he pulled out Jungkook's white button down, pulling it onto his body and buttoning it up, laughing at the missing button. The shirt's length lets it cover himself to about his mid-thigh region.

His body felt light as a feather, and his eyes were heavy. He crawled into bed, sinking into the place where Jungkook slept, running his fingers over the dip. He turned his nose into the shirt, smelling that beautiful floral vanilla scent, a smile pulling to his face.

"See you in the morning, my love."

He slept soundly, until he heard his phone go off somewhere in the apartment. He was too comfortable, though. The most comfortable he had been in years. He let himself drift back to sleep.

He woke to Taehyung yelling. He couldn't understand what he was saying. Why was Taehyung in his apartment? He didn't care. He looked at Taehyung, whose back was to him. Taehyung was on the phone, hand threaded through his hair. He fell back to sleep.

He woke to some people touching him, but didn't bother opening his eyes. He could hear crying somewhere else in the room. He let himself go back to sleep.

He woke as he was loaded into a car. Where was he going? He fell back to sleep.

He woke to some more people touching him. His eyes were being opened for him, a bright light shining into one of them, followed by the other. He fell back to sleep.

He couldn't feel his body when he woke the next time. He remembers lots of screaming, along with someone crying. He recognized that cry as Taehyung's. Why was he crying? He was just having the best sleep he'd had in years. Shouldn't they be happy for him? He fell back to sleep.

He woke again what felt like moments later, opening his eyes just the slightest. Next to him was Taehyung, his face red and streaked with tears. He tried to speak, to ask him what was wrong, but all that came out was the smallest squeak. But even the squeak had Taehyung's head swinging upwards, eyes wide. He gave Taehyung a smile. A real, full smile. Taehyung turned and called for a doctor, but by the time the doctor had come, Jimin was already fast asleep.

The next time Jimin woke up, he was warm all over. He was so well rested, his body felt like heaven. He stretched his arms over his head, legs spread out as far as they could go. When he opened his eyes, he immediately recognized it as his apartment, the room filled with a soft golden glow from the window outside. For the first time in years, his apartment felt warm. The bed even felt warm, feeling like clouds. His arm reached out beside him to feel the dip where his husband used to lie, only to freeze when he felt a solid body. The skin was too soft, too familiar.

A muscular hand laced their fingers with his. Jimin slowly turned to see who was where only Jungkook was allowed to be. What he was met with was golden skin, a beautiful bunny-toothed smile, and those beautiful galaxy eyes he missed so much. He stared at the man beside him. "J...Jungkook?" His voice came out as barely a whisper.

"Good morning, my love." The man said. Jimin's heart was in his ears, beating so loud that he could barely hear. He stared at him for what felt like hours. "How?" was all he could get out. The man just chuckled softly, rubbing his thumb along the ridges of Jimin's hand. "Is... Is this real? A-Are you here?" Jimin turns on his side, his eyes wide. The man just opens his arms as an offering to move closer. It took a moment, but Jimin slowly moved over into the man's arms. He felt the man's arms close around him, tight enough to cuddle him in, but still so gentle. Just like his husband.

He relaxed his head against the pillow. It was then that a waft of that beautiful scent hit his nose.

Heliotropes.

He immediately started crying, covering his face with his hands. "Why are you crying, love?" He looked up to Jungkook, a small smile on his lips. He reached his hands up and placed them on both of his cheeks, smooshing them slightly in the process. "Is it really you?" Jungkook just laughed in response, nodding at him. "Yes, it's me. Jeon Jungkook, your husband."

Jimin broke down then, wrapping his whole body around his husband. He didn't know how, but his husband was there, in his arms. He pinched himself to make sure he was awake. He felt pain. He was awake. His husband was there.

He pulled back to look at Jungkook. Staring back at him were those beautiful galaxy eyes. "I missed you so much, Jungkook. Please never leave me again." He said between sniffles. Jungkook smiled widely, giving him a nod. "I promise, my love. Never again." Jungkook leaned in, letting his lips slot against Jimin's, who eagerly accepted.

Jimin was in heaven, laying next to his husband.

Finally, Jimin felt the warmth he had missed so much.

Finally, Jimin was with his galaxies and heliotropes again.