Chapter 24

Sheanna’Ree lay on her bed and stared at the ceiling. There were exactly one million, three hundred, twenty-one thousand, six hundred fifty-six black dots there. She knew that with some certainty having counted them three times while waiting for the humans to give her an answer.

She ground her teeth together for a few moments just to break the monotony. What was taking so long?

For at least the fiftieth time the alien woman questioned her decision to come to the humans for help. They weren’t at all what she expected. They weren’t overly smart…or clever…or even physically intimidating.  They were more…rustic. But somehow they had managed to handle every threat they had faced quite nicely.

She thought about the men who chased her. She could probably kill them but that would lead to more coming after her. And then more after that. Eventually she would lose. But if she managed to convince these simpletons to do any required killing, all blame would be removed from her shoulders. That might just give her father the time he needed to take control of The Corporation.

When that happened she would be safe to go home. Once there she might even be able to fulfill her promise to help the humans out.

Her revery was interrupted by the door chime.

“Come in,” Sheanna’Ree said, sitting up quickly.

The door opened and Betty Sue walked into the small cabin.

“Missy, we’d all like to talk to you fer a spell. Could you come with me to the galley, please?”

Sheanna’Ree’s heart sank a little at the formality of the human woman’s words. The tone didn’t bode well either. “Yes, Betty Sue.”

She followed Betty Sue out of the cabin and into the Galley. Zeke and Carol Anne were seated at the table. Jim Bob looked in from the loading bay door and Bobby John was nowhere to be seen.

The two women sat down facing each other, Betty Sue at the head of the table.

Betty Sue cleared her throat and began to speak. “Sheanna’Ree, we’ve been talking about you for the past several hours and, quite frankly, ah don’t know what to do with you.”

“You could help me out like I asked you,” the alien woman said hopefully. “Then I can get my father to help you out too.”

Betty Sue folded her hands together and looked Sheanna’Ree in the eyes. “Tell me, Missy, what does your pa do that you need protecting?”

“He’s a businessman. Like I told you before, he is about to be promoted to be the big boss and there is another man who wants the job. That man is trying to kidnap me so my father won’t take the job.”

“It is interesting that you call your father ‘Big Boss’, Sheanna’Ree,” Grokmar said from a speaker. “Can you tell us exactly what your father’s company does?”

Sheanna’Ree tried not to visibly wince at the question. She had been expecting it…eventually. Just not so soon. “The Corporation does a lot of things: shipping, distribution, sales⁠*." (*Ten gets you one that the items that are shipped, distributed and sold fall under a category that can loosely be called 'pharmaceuticals.)

“Of what, exactly,” Grokmar asked.

“Whatever will make the most profit.”

“Would it surprise you to learn that I have investigated The Corporation?” Grokmar asked. “My research seems to indicate that the business conducted by your father’s company is largely illegal in nature.”

“The Corporation provides a number of services,” Sheanna’Ree said neutrally. “Some of those services are considered illegal by close-minded politicians⁠*." (*the perennial cry of the rogue)

“Ah won’t argue that most politicians aren’t the sharpest tools in the shed,” Betty Sue began. “But we can’t go around breaking the law or we’ll be in a heap of trouble.” The woman looked around the table. “Ah’m sorry, Missy, but I’m afraid we cain’t help you.”

Sheanna’Ree couldn’t believe her ears. “You’re afraid you might get into trouble from breaking the law? Lady, you’re already in a lot of trouble or have you forgotten?”

Betty Sue smiled and shook her head. “Ah’m sure once we explain that it’s all just a big misunderstanding, we can get the whole thing cleared up nice as you please.”

“Excuse me, Betty Sue?”

“What is it Dirt Floor?”

“While you were talking, I intercepted another transmission. It appears that you humans are in more trouble than you might think.”

“What in tarnation are you talking about?”

“Let me show you,” Grokmar said, activating the galley’s video screen.

The now familiar strains of the Galaxy Special News Flash intro music filled the cabin. The vidcast voiceover then spoke. “This is the Galaxy Special News Flash with voice of the Galaxy, MegaDan Scholes.” The music faded as the voiceover ended.

The purple cloaked MegaDan Scholes appears on the screen. “Hello Galaxy, this is MegaDan Scholes with a special Galaxy News Flash. I am reporting to you live from the Galactic Counsel Garbage Scow, Turdination. Apparently my last broadcast was not appreciated by some of the brass. My sources tell me that there has been a breakthrough in the search for the alien species known as ‘humanity’.”

As MegaDan is speaking, a digitally rendered picture of a smiling human playing with a ball of yarn is flashed onto the screen.

“Now, I ask you, does this look like the face of a nefarious species intent on killing all life in the universe? I have been speaking to famed Xenobiologist Hilling Felderspa about humans and he had these things to say.”

A video window pops onto the screen showing a treelike being with a moss beard and heavy spectacles.

The being known as Hilling Felderspa speaks in a pseudo-German accent/ “I haf been studink zis species from ze small collection of known information and I haf developed ze theory zat zey are zimply tourists. Zey are unfamiliar vith our culture and haf made ze zimple tourist-type mistakes ve all haf made ven ve haf travelled. Zey are harmless and do not deserve to be kilt.”

“That’s very interesting, Doctor. Would you say that the current actions of the Galactic Counsel and more specifically, Vice Chancellor Greklor are an appropriate response to the supposed human threat,” said MegaDan. As he mentions Vice Chancellor Greklor a distorted picture of the being was super-imposed over the human image. This image showed the Vice Chancellor attempting to bite the human’s head off.

“Nein!” said Hilling Felderspa. “Ze actions of ze counsel cross ze border of criminal behavior. It is my esteemed opinion zat zey should be removed from office at vonce!”

“Thank you for your time, Doctor.”

“My pleasure, MegaDan.” As the doctor finishes speaking the video window disappears.

MegaDan flourishes his cape and looks directly into the camera, capturing the viewers in an almost hypnotic spell. “There you have it. Even the experts disagree with the Vice Chancellor’s recent actions.” MegaDan cocks his head and puts a finger to his left ear. “Folks, this just in. Apparently Vice Chancellor Greklor assaulted one of his subordinates earlier today.”

The image of the ensign with a silly grin holding a beverage replaces the human’s image. The graphic of Greklor now appears to be trying to bite his head off instead.

MegaDan’s expression is now deadly serious and sad as he speaks. “Kigor ‘Buddy’ Rastabean was attacked by the Vice Chancellor when he delivered some bad news, according to sources. To quote, ‘The Vice Chancellor tore off his arm and beat him with the bloody end until Buddy was dying at his feet.’ The victim was left on the bridge deck until the Vice Chancellor finally let one of the officers get treatment.

Now, I don’t know about you, but I cannot believe we are allowing a maniac like Greklor to be in charge of anything on the Counsel. To give him command of a fleet intent on the extermination of a harmless species is pure madness.”

Outro music begins to play.

MegaDan turns on his megawatt smile and speaks a last time. “And that’s another Galaxy News Special Report. I’m MegaDan Scholes wishing you good news and good luck.>

Outro music plays and fades out.

The humans sat in stunned silence.

“What does that all mean, Betty Sue,” Zeke said.

“It means you need my help,” Sheanna’Ree said. “Maybe even more than I need yours.”

Betty Sue sat back, her face pale. She looked up at the ceiling for a moment before focusing her attention back on the alien woman. “You sure your daddy can help us?”

For the first time, Sheanna’Ree felt hope. She leaned toward Betty Sue. “Absolutely! The one thing about my father’s line of business is that he knows all the secrets of the various politicians. He can get the attack on your planet stopped.”

“Then I guess we have no choice.…” Betty Sue began to say.

Jim Bob spoke up for the first time. “Betty Sue, you promised Sheanna’Ree would go and I’d get some room in here again. Between her ship and all the wrapped critters, there isn’t a spare inch for me to get comfortable in!”

“Hush, Jim Bob,” Betty Sue said. “If’n you hadn’t gotten yourself into trouble back on that there space station, it wouldn’t a problem. Sides, if we don’t get her help ever’body we’ve ever known and then some will wind up dead. I can’t have that on my conscience.”

“But what about me?”

“Jim Bob, if I can get you new arms and legs so you could leave the loading bay, would you be willing to help me?” Sheanna’Ree asked.

Jim Bob looked suddenly contrite. “Ma’am, if you can do that, I’ll be in your debt. Course I’d help you.”

“Then I know just who to go to. The person I’m thinking of is a doctor and scientist. I’m pretty sure he can help Jim Bob out. He’ll probably accept a few of the bigger animals you have in the hold as payment, too.”

“Hold on, one moment,” Grokmar said. “We cannot go traipsing off to wherever you chose. I have a mission to complete.”

Betty Sue looked up at the ship’s video camera. “Cat Door, you have no idea what your mission even is yet, do you?”

“Well, no….”

“Then how in tarnation do you know the place Missy here wants to go to ain’t part of your ‘mission’?”

“I…do not know….”

“My point exactly,” Betty Sue said. “Who knows, maybe this doctor fella can even help you with your memory problems.”

“I guess it will not hurt to try….”

“Glad you see it my way, Grokmar.” Betty Sue said with a triumphant smile. “Now, Missy, point this here ship in the right direction.”