Hi guys, 

So for those of you who thought this was an update, I'm sorry, it's not. I really hate doing this but you guys are so amazing and awesome, I feel you're owed some sort of explanation for my distinct lack of updates and my consistent hiatuses. So, here it is. 

2017 as a whole has been a pretty stressful year for me, both in the 'not-that-important' fandom sense, and the much more real sense. I'll get the crappy stuff out of the way first. Back in May, dead in the middle of my A-Levels (I don't know what the worldwide equivalent is, so they're the exams that get me into university for those of you who don't know), my grandmother had a pretty serious fall. She leaves quite far from me, and we're the only family she has. She was sent to hospital where they cared for her, and was able to come out within a month with carers looking after her. However, with my dad working all the time, my mum also had to go up and down to her house every day to see her. We also inherited her dog, which I'm more than happy about, so now we have two. With both my parents away a fair bit, and what with me either being at university or working, and now two dogs to look after, it's been pretty stressful.

Last week, she had another fall and she's back in hospital. We're trying to get her moved into sheltered accommodation near to us, which will hopefully make everyone's live a little bit easier. Unfortunately, this could take quite a while and trying to get it done as quickly as possible has proved to be fairly difficult. She may now be in hospital over Christmas, which naturally, no-one is particularly happy about. 

Right, onto the fandom stuff. As you guys may know, we lost Teen Wolf this year. This is probably going to sound pretty stupid, but that hit me hard. Stiles Stilinski was a character that I highly related to, that I found a sense of solace in, that was able to remind me that it's okay to be a little bit different from the rest of the world. Saying goodbye to that was like saying goodbye to a good friend, and trust me, I've done plenty of that in my life. I did cry, I'm not ashamed to say that. I knew I could rewatch episodes over and over again, that I'd never truly lose Teen Wolf, but there was still a part of me that was unmotivated and frustrated, a part of me I felt was missing for quite some time. 

I'm just thanking my lucky stars that Supernatural doesn't appear to be ending any time soon, or I think I'll scream. 

I decided to write this to you guys because of a very important video that was released last week; the trailer. I don't think it could have been any more perfect, and I felt such pride watching it. I was so proud of Dylan for coming back to us in such an amazing way, proud of Thomas for delivering that line (and we all know which one I'm talking about) so sincerely and so powerfully, proud of Kaya, Dexter, Ki Hong, Will, that entire cast for just being the characters that I read about, and delivering their roles with such accuracy. I'm proud of Wes and James for just giving us a high note to leave on. I'm proud to be a part of this fandom with you guys, and I know that when it's all over next year, we'll never cease to exist. 

And to everyone whom I'm proud of, thank you. 

Today, it really hit me that January 26th would be the last release date of a Maze Runner film, and as it means so much to me, as it's helped me through so much in my life having been there in my darkest moments, I realised that this book does too. Every part of it. I'm not leaving, I am going to update after Christmas, I swear. You all need to attack my message board if I don't. 

I'm sorry guys, I really am. But thank you so so so much for your amazing support. Keep up the good work!

Right, enough with the ridiculously dramatic rant. Off I go to work. 

Have an amazing day, I love every single one of you!

LJ xx