015. clouded minds

There are very few people in this world that Emerald cares about and Phoenix is number one. He's only been in her life for a few short years but the man has been a constant since he walked in, yet to leave or abandon her like so many others. In many ways, she thinks of him as her parents because her own is so unloving and cold that she seeks out the comfort in a man who helped keep her alive.

So it's no shock to her when her body seems to move on it's own accord, the brunette sprinting in the direction of his screams. The idea of losing him, of him being in pain, messes with her mind in ways she cannot even explain. It's never easy to lose people, but those you love well it's a whole different ball game.

"Phoenix!" Emerald yells, desperate to find where exactly he might be. It's a large arena but due to the fact she can hear him, he must be somewhere close enough. His voice intertwines with the cracks of the foliage beneath her feet, a somewhat cruel mix. "Phoenix!"

She can just hear the faint sound of Silas calling out to her, telling her to stop. Katniss' screams are still happening ahead of her, the girl screeching her sister's name over and over as if it'll stop Prim's pained yells. The sound of Katniss, Prim and Phoenix rolling together is enough to top any of the pain or torture she's endured over her lifetime, her heart is cracking more and more with each passing second.

Spinning around in a circle, Emerald is so lost as to where his voice is actually coming from, tears now freely sliding down her cheeks. The Capitol have always been ruthless, she cannot even explain the amount of suffering they make Districts endure, but to her this is next level. Why must they hurt those who are already having to fight to the death? Why make them suffer so much more before they inevitably die in a stupid game the Capitol had made up to begin with?

"Emerald! It's not real!"

Katniss is rushing over with Finnick following closely behind her, breathless and trauma filled, reaching Emerald before she can take off again. "They're jabberjays, it's not really him,"

"But they mimic, Katniss, Jabberjays mimic," Emerald cries out, shuddering at the thought of Phoenix being in inexplicable pain. If they've hurt him, have they also hurt Esme? Have they killed two innocent people just to get to a girl who is already so shattered beyond compare?

The birds fly around them, one loudly relaying Phoenix's scream right into her left ear. She puts her hands over her ears, trying to block out the noise but failing miserably, if anything it's as if the birds get even louder to compensate. As more begin to circle, the trio take off towards where they'd come from just before. Emerald, in her emotional state, doesn't even notice the way Katniss seems to hit some invisible barrier — instead she just sinks to the ground and curls up into a protective position.

Sobs fall from her lips as freely as words, hands pressing against her ears so harshly that she may break a few of her fingers. Time passes so agonizingly slow that Emerald thinks she may have been here for hours, when in reality it had been mere minutes. A second feels like a minute, a minute like an hour, and when the sound of the birds eventually fades away into the distance, Emerald can still hear them squawking.

Hands gently grasp onto her wrists and pry her hands away from the sides of her head, the touch so soft that she hardly feels it at all. The feeling of skin on her's is so delicate, almost as if the person is afraid she will break if touched too harshly – it's so different from everything she'd ever felt before, her mother would rather break her bones than treat her with kindness.

Emerald slowly opens her eyes and looks up to see Silas crouching in front of her, looking at her in a way that brings her comfort. Without much of a second thought, she pushes forward and wraps her arms around him, the boy sitting on the foliage beneath him to accommodate her. They stay like that for a while, Emerald listening to the steady beat of his heart — and slowly the sound of those awful screeches wisp away into nothingness.

Some may call her silly, for letting her guard down so easy, but the crashing of the waves drowns out any of those thoughts as she lays on the sandy shore. The sunlight beams against her skin, the minimal clouds in the sky moving slow enough that she can count every single one of them, it's almost like being back home as a little girl — her father loved to gaze at the clouds, that she does remember.

They're all merging into one another as she watches, neither of them their own individual anymore, completely united into one giant streak of white. It sucks all the fun out of staring at them, no longer is she able to try and imagine them as something else, it's just one smudged section.

"Are you okay?"

Emerald turns her head to the side just as the water brushes against the legs of her wetsuit, eyes looking straight into Silas' as he moves to lay beside her. "Mm. Did you ever go cloud watching?"

Silas is a little puzzled by her question but nods his head slightly, almost deep in thought as he does so. "My mum used to love it. She'd take me into one of the fields and show me all the different shapes,"

His small smile is fond but also slightly pained as she remembers his mother, the woman not having passed away too long ago. Emerald knows that it's hard to move on from a loss so big, she still feels the absence of her father to this day.

"That one looks like a bird," He quietly points out, using his pointer finger to gesture to the sky. Emerald follows his direction and spots the now separated cloud he's talking about, mass now parted into many different shapes. "And that one like a tree,"

"Looks more like a giraffe to me," Emerald smiles, her mind wandering back to those books she'd read during her time in the Capitol — hundreds of animals that she'll probably never get to see. "Or maybe a tall tower of some sort,"

The two lay in a comfortable silence, each content with merely being in the company of one another as the world around them continues on. It's as if it's just them, the duo from District Eight, and nobody else. Emerald hasn't felt so calm in a long while, her body relaxed and her mind at ease as she looks at the morphing clouds.

"Do you think they're real?" Emerald asks the boy to her side after several minutes. "Nothing feels real anymore,"

Silas takes a few moments to think over his answer before his eyes travel back to her face, analyzing every small feature. "I'm not so sure. I don't think anything in these Games is ever truly real except the trauma, the death. Even the most beautiful of flowers can be lethal in here,"

Emerald hums softly, feeling the breeze wash over her face. "I wish they were real,"

Emerald turns onto her side as he continues to watch her, her eyes still red from the tears she had shed not too long ago. Even then, Silas cannot help but admire her undeniable beauty, the same way he had unknowingly for years. The brunette girl is now looking at him too, slowly moving herself closer before laying her head on his chest, right above his heart.

The gentle beats ring through her ears and send a wave of emotion through her. "Sometimes, I just have to make sure you're real too," she breathes softly, looking up at him.

Silas lifts his hand and brushes some hair away from her eyes, unable to find the words to express to her what he's thinking. So, as she looks away to stare at the beauty of the waves crashing against the sand, Silas continues to adore her in silence — every passing moment being another memory he locks away in his mind.

NOTE!

It's been months and I'm so sorry! I certainly haven't forgotten about this story and I hope to have updates become more frequent! Thank you for reading :)