Katya let out a sigh of relief when a gas station popped up on the side of the road. It was small and old, but had a tiny store where they could hopefully find something for Yelena's arm, and food and drinks. Because after the day they had, they could use something in their stomachs.

The sun had started to set and threw an orange glow over the city. This neighborhood was calm, silent, and the birds loved the end of the day. They chirped happily, something that didn't quite fit the Russians' moods. Nevertheless, it was calm and they could take a breather to get their heads straight. Think about next steps to take.

Katya had shaken her small argument with Yelena out of her head and joined the others. A sit-down with Natasha would be nice, but they couldn't just ask Yelena to piss off for five minutes. Katya had to accept that their private moments were on the back burner for now. But it was nice, for once, to have some company.

''The Red Room's still active. Where is it?'' Natasha finally asked after hours of silence. They stepped into the tiny and dirty store of the gas station, ignoring the man behind the counter. To him, three very attractive customers just walked in, oblivious to the fact that they were anything but innocent.

''I have no idea,'' Yelena answered, walking ahead to the medicine and shifting some things around to find what she was looking for. The backroom they were in was so small it hardly fit three people comfortably. ''He moves location constantly. And every Widow is sedated on entry and exit for maximum security.''

Natasha shook her head to herself, a frown on her face. ''I'm just finding it hard to believe that he could stay off my radar.'' It was true, she kept an eye out for any- and everything of importance. She was paranoid to the core. So if anything had pointed in Dreykov's direction, even remotely, she'd have seen it.

Yelena shrugged, gathering some stuff in her hands. Gauze, mostly. ''Well, it's not smart to attack an Avenger if you want to stay hidden. I mean, the clue is in the name. Dreykov kills you, one of the big ones comes to avenge you.''

Both Katya and Natasha furrowed their eyebrows in confusion, but the latter asked the question. ''Wait, what are the big ones?'' The rest of the sentence made sense, though.

''Well, I doubt the god from space has to take an ibuprofen after a fight.''

Despite their argument before, Katya felt herself smile. How could she not, when Yelena's humor was so dry that she couldn't help but laugh. ''It hurts that you don't think of either of us as the 'big ones','' Katya said, trying to pick up that light tone again. But Yelena wouldn't even look at her, so her face fell quickly.

''Where did you think I was all this time?'' the blonde questioned genuinely, watching her sister hang her head and drop her gaze to the floor. Without making eye contact again, Natasha pushed past her to a sink in the corner of the room to wash her hands. It was obvious what she was doing: trying to hide.

''I thought that you got out and were living a normal life,'' she lied casually. Well, only partly. Option one was that she died, which is what Natasha always believed to be the most true. Option two was what she just said. Although Katya doubted if she ever fully believed that to be true herself. Natasha was an exception. Nobody escaped after her. 

Katya only stood three feet away from Yelena, so she could see the skepticism in her eyes. ''And you just never made contact again?'' They talked back-to-back, one looking in the mirror above the sink to wash the dirt stains off her face, the other gathering stuff from the shelf to fix the cut in her arm. What a typical day.

''Honestly, I thought you didn't wanna see me.'' 

Yelena let out a loud and sarcastic laugh. ''Bullshit.'' With the stuff in her hands, she moved for the counter, leaving the backroom behind. ''You just didn't want your baby sister to tag along whilst you saved the world with the cool kids.''

''You weren't really my sister,'' Natasha countered casually, drying her hands and walking past a hurt Yelena. The harm was in the message, not her tone.

''Nat.'' Katya's eyes widened and she pushed off the doorframe, softly scolding her wife for saying that. But she didn't acknowledge her warning, as usual. She wished they would stop fighting and bickering already. However, she knew this conversation was between the two of them, and tried not to mingle too much. 

It was understandable that Yelena was mad, but it made it so much more difficult to focus on the real mission here.

''And the Avengers aren't really your family,'' Yelena said to hurt Natasha back. If it worked wasn't clear, because they stood back-to-back once again so Katya couldn't see the redhead's face. She must know though, that after everything they went through as a team, the Avengers were family. 

Yelena threw all her stuff on the counter, once again without looking at the employee, who started scanning everything quickly. He must know something shady was going on with them.

''Why do you always do that thing?'' she asked suddenly. Katya swore that her mood swings were worse than Natasha's.

The woman in question turned away from the front window to stand at the counter as well. ''Do what?''

''The thing you do when you're fighting.'' Yelena didn't receive anything but a questioning look, so she took a step to her left for more space and acted it out. With Katya still in the doorway to the backroom, she had a perfect front-view of the theatrics. ''The... Like, the... This thing that you do when you whip your hair when you're fighting with the arm and the hair.'' 

She acted it out perfectly, even whipping her hair up. ''And you do, like, a fighting pose. It's a fighting pose. You're a total poser,'' Yelena laughed throughout the whole thing, and it was contagious, so Katya found herself chuckling as well. Even Natasha had trouble forcing her smile down.

''I'm not a poser.''

Katya didn't try and hide her smile. ''You kinda are.'' It received a dirty look from Natasha, to which she simply shrugged.

''Oh, come on. I mean, they're great poses, but it does look like you think everyone's looking at you, like, all the time,'' Yelena rambled on. Now it felt familiar again. Making fun of someone, using her humor.

But right when the mood was a bit lighter, Natasha shut down and threw up her self-defense system. Katya saw it happen, how the humor disappeared and her eyes grew cold. ''All that time that I spent posing, I was trying to actually do something good to make up for all the pain and suffering that we caused. Trying to be more than just a trained killer.''

Yelena's face fell but she stayed composed and didn't miss a beat. ''Well, then you were fooling yourself because pain and suffering is every day and we are both still a trained killer.'' She raised her chin and looked her dead in the eye. ''Except I'm not the one that's on the cover of a magazine. I'm not the killer that little girls call their hero.'' Throwing money from her backpack on the counter, she stalked out the store without looking back.

Katya sadly watched her go, wanting to follow her. But she wasn't sure if she'd appreciate that. It felt like she was playing mediator in some dysfunctional family. Two sisters who were too stubborn to let the other in. To forget the past and focus on the now. 

She walked around the counter to the front, ending up on Natasha's left. ''She's not the easiest.'' 

When she once again didn't look at her, Katya sighed and stepped closer, wrapping both her hands around Natasha's left. The effect was what the brunette hoped for. A pair of tired green eyes found her blue ones immediately, softening as they met. 

''You should give up your hard-ass behavior. You care about her. Why are you pushing her away?'' Katya asked softly.

''She's not my sister,'' was Natasha's automatic response, anything to justify her behavior. But her eyes looked into Katya's, betraying anything she lied about.

Katya threw her a soft glare. ''Oh, come on, we both know that's not true. Besides, who cares? Does she have to be for you to care about her?'' She squeezed her hand, making sure to keep her attention. ''I can see you like her. Let her in. You already missed out on so much time with her.''

Natasha didn't really seem to listen to her words. Mostly because she was busy thinking about something else, triggered by Katya's gentle words. Something that had guilt swarming behind her eyes. ''I've been ignoring you.''

''It's okay," Katya reassured, letting her lace her fingers through her own. "You have a lot going on in that head of yours.'' Her words didn't do much to dissolve the guilt.

''But so do you,'' Natasha muttered, her eyes soft. ''This can't be easy for you either.'' 

The employee behind the counter obviously didn't understand shit of what they were saying. His confused eyes flickered back and forth between the whispering spies in front of him. He should be able to guess that they were more than just friends. Nobody looked at friends like that. 

Katya sighed and looked at their intertwined hands. ''To know that the guy who ruined our childhood is, in fact, not blown to pieces like we believed he was?'' She shrugged and met Natasha's patient eyes again. ''Yeah, it sucks. But you know I don't like looking back. Now I just get to kill him with you.'' When she realized how that sounded, she frowned. She thought she was over that. ''That probably shouldn't feel as good as it does.''

''Your optimism never ceases to amaze me,'' Natasha chuckled, but it didn't hold the usual flair. She was glad Katya handled this better than her, but made a mental note to talk to her more. Her thumb brushed over Katya's hands as she glanced outside, trying to catch a glimpse of Yelena, but she had walked out of sight. ''You like her, don't you?''

''I do actually,'' she smiled. Seeing how much Natasha hated that. Or pretended to hate that. It would be so much easier to keep Yelena at a distance. ''And I meant what I said. Stop throwing your guard up and she'll let hers down as well. I think she's someone you should keep close.'' 

She saw Natasha considering it. Katya's opinion mattered to her, it held weight. Especially since it was able to provide an objective view. And slowly, her eyes softened, giving in to the fact that Katya had a point. What would she do without her?

''I wanna kiss you really badly,'' Natasha admitted, completely catching Katya off guard.

''I think we'll give this guy a heart attack if you do,'' she chuckled, not looking at the man who was still waiting for both of them to leave. Maybe he thought they were discussing what else to get. If that was the case, he was a horrible people reader.

Natasha side-eyed the guy, smirking to herself. ''I don't know. He looks like he'll enjoy some girl-on-girl action.''

''And now you made it weird," Katya said, grossed out. Her scrunch of nose was received with a chuckle. "You can kiss me later. There's a sister waiting outside who I think we should check up on." That was weird to say. Sister.

She went to take the goods from the counter and walk off, but firm hands cupped her cheeks and next thing she knew, lips were on hers. Shortly, but they definitely kissed in front of the red-cheeked gas station employee. His jaw dropped, and he didn't realize he was staring.

Natasha watched Katya's shocked expression with a smirk, letting her face go and picking up the beers. "I needed to," she used as excuse, walking out without saying anything else.

Katya blinked as she stared at her until she had disappeared outside, shaking her head because kissing Natasha always hit her hard. Especially when it came out of nowhere. And she knew that too. Doing this to embarrass her.

With an apologetic and awkward smile to the employee, Katya picked up the rest of their stuff - which at this point was mostly food - and rushed to get out. She panicked a bit when she didn't see them immediately, but once again, Natasha's red hair came to the rescue. 

It had gotten dark at this point, but the gas station had a roofed terrace with some plastic tables and chairs lined up. Maybe eight tables in total? It wasn't big and it wasn't busy, but perfect for taking a breather after a high-speed chase through the city. 

Yelena hissed and groaned when the alcohol from the small bottle she had bought, hit her cut skin. Now that the scarf was off and the light hit it, the severity of it could be studied. It was a nasty wound, one that could get infected if not treated correctly, but wasn't too bad. She knew how to take care of it.

Natasha had taken the chair across from Yelena, staring off somewhere to her right, where a badly lit workshop was in use. A man working on his shiny sportscar, kids running around the lot. They shrieked when one of them missed the football they played with. The setting gave Katya a warm feeling in her stomach. It felt cozy, normal.

But reality sucked. So without getting acknowledged in any way, she pulled up a chair next to Natasha and plopped down in it, throwing the packages of food on the table. All but one, which she opened and started eating. Chips. Not very healthy. 

''That gas, the counteragent, it was synthesized in secret by an older Widow from Melina's generation,'' Yelena suddenly spoke up. Like she had decided to open up or waited for everyone to be here so she didn't have to say the same thing twice. ''I was on the mission to retrieve it, and she exposed me and I killed the Widow that freed me.''

Katya abruptly lost all her appetite and threw the bag of chips on the table, listening to Yelena's broken voice instead. She struggled with what she had done, hating herself for killing the one who got her out.

''Did you have a choice?'' Natasha tried to make her feel better, but nothing could. Yelena was as stubborn as herself, blaming herself for something she couldn't help. Ran in the family apparently.

''What you experienced was psychological conditioning. I'm talking about chemically altering brain functions. They're two completely different things. You're fully conscious, but you don't know which part is you,'' she explained, not taking her eyes off Natasha the whole time. At least until her voice broke again. ''I'm still not sure.''

It was so sad to see. This woman who had been used and brainwashed so much that she didn't remember who she was. Couldn't make out which thoughts were hers and which were programmed. Was she naturally sarcastic or something she was taught? It explained her mood swings if she really did struggle so much.

Katya's heart sunk and she wanted to reach over and hug her. Like Natasha always did for her. Like Yelena deserved as well.

But Natasha got up instead and dragged her chair around the table, planting it next to Yelena's and helping her with her injury. The blonde eyed her carefully, not sure if she could trust her with that. But Natasha acted as calm and normal as usual, so she quickly relaxed once she saw how gentle she worked on it. 

''Katya knows what you mean,'' Natasha muttered without looking up from her arm.

Interested, Yelena's blue eyes landed on Katya, who leaned back in her seat, took a beer from the table and messed with the label, just to have something else to look at. She could tell this story now, since Yelena knew about where she had been.

''They did sort of the same to me in HYDRA. Say a couple words and you're gone. Like you, I was awake, but not in control. Only focused on one thing: the mission.'' She quickly took a sip from her drink, shifting uncomfortably in her seat. This was hard to talk about. All those memories coming back. That helpless feeling. ''Almost killed Nat one time.'' 

Yelena didn't look at her with pity, like most did. No, she nodded to herself, like Katya confirmed something. ''So you understand why we need to free the others.''

Surprised, Katya dragged her eyes away from the beer bottle and back to the patient Russian on the other side of the table. ''Better than anyone.'' She took another sip, averting her gaze to the table again. Her past surfaced slowly, piece by piece, these last few days. And she hated every single thing about it.

''Is that all there is left?'' Natasha changed the topic after a short silence, nodding to Yelena's backpack with the red glow coming from the open zipper. It seemed that she took Katya's advice and acted more gentle towards her sister.

Yelena hummed in confirmation. ''It's the only thing that can stop Dreykov and his network of Widows. He takes more every day. Children who don't have anyone to protect them. Just like us when we were small,'' she spoke to both of them. Because like it or not, at one moment, they were all there together. 

Although Katya had trouble matching the little girl with the strong blonde sitting in front of her right now. Taken from their homes, the street, wherever they came from. Nobody knew and nobody wanted to. Because being left in the dark is much better than knowing for sure your parents sold you or left you to starve in the streets.

''Maybe one in twenty survives the training, becomes a Widow. The rest, he kills. Well, except for you,'' she gestured to Katya, who smiled sadly. ''To him, we are just things. Weapons with no face that he can just throw away. Because there is always more. And no one's even looking for him, thanks to you and Alexei,'' she accused Natasha, who finished wrapping Yelena's arm neatly, cutting the excess gauze off. 

''Alexei?'' Natasha seemed surprised to hear his name. Katya was mostly confused. Because, again, she knew next to nothing about the Ohio mission. Let alone names. Natasha always told her there wasn't much to tell, so Katya never asked.

Yelena chuckled humorlessly. ''''Dad''.'' Yeah, that wasn't weird at all. 

Natasha picked up her chair and dragged it to its original spot, next to Katya again. Sinking down, she too grabbed her beer and drank it slowly. 

The silence wasn't unpleasant, for the first time this trip. The children were still running around, pulling the trio's attention to them. Their parents placed them on their hip, took their hands, smiles all around. It usually didn't do much to Katya, but now she had to look away.

''Did you ever look for your parents? Your real ones?'' Yelena asked, motivated by the scene next to them. 

Katya shook her head immediately, going back to eating her chips to avoid having to talk. She stared at the table, feeling her mind drift off slowly. She was tired, in pain, and it was all becoming too much mentally. 

Natasha swirled her bottle around. ''Well, my mom abandoned me in the street like garbage,'' she answered, too casually for the topic. Only Katya and maybe Clint knew how much she struggled with it. If only her mother could see what became of her redhaired daughter. She'd be so proud of the kind and big-hearted woman she turned into. ''What about you?''

''They destroyed my birth certificate, so I reinvented it,'' Yelena said with a smug smile. ''My parents still live in Ohio. My sister moved out west.''

Natasha's eyes lit up, her own smile spreading on her lips. ''Is that right?''

''You're a science teacher. You're working part-time, though, especially after you had your son. Your husband, he renovates houses,'' Yelena summed up, painting a clear picture of the future she wished for Natasha, but never got. Despite it being beautiful, Katya couldn't help but feel sad for her. She never got that simple life. Maybe in the future.

''That is not my story,'' Natasha smiled. 

Yelena hummed, glancing at Katya who already felt where this was going. ''I can see that now. You're with a woman. Never knew you were gay.''

''Well, then you were really blind,'' Katya chimed in, smirking behind her beer bottle when Natasha chuckled. She could never ever picture her wife with a guy. It just didn't click. ''I like the teacher part though,'' she teased, receiving an eyeroll from the woman next to her.

Yelena studied them, their interaction, and realized how her fantasy could never top reality, no matter how screwed it was at the moment. ''I like this story better.'' Her tone was genuine, kind, and Katya couldn't help but smile in gratitude. It couldn't be easy for her to see her sister happy while she had felt so alone for years. 

''Did you ever wish for kids?'' Both Katya's and Natasha's face fell. The latter didn't need to answer. Her silence was enough. Luckily, Yelena sensed that too, and reached for her vest, sliding it on.

''I want a dog,'' she announced, pulling her hair out of the vest and leaning her chin in her hand. The comment cleared the air of the heavy topic, and Katya didn't feel the need to stay frozen in her seat anymore. So she rudely pulled one foot up on the dark green plastic of the chair to bring her knee to her chest. What she would pay for a good bed right now...

Natasha studied her sister, the relaxed expression on her face again. She felt comfortable here, with Yelena, and Natasha didn't feel comfortable with anyone. ''Where you gonna go?'' 

''I don't know. I don't really have anywhere to go back to, so I guess anywhere,'' she trailed off. It sounded... free, happy, excited. Not like someone who's panicking because they're on their own without a place to stay or a job. 

Natasha exhaled deeply, pushing away from the backrest of the chair to sit up straight, placing her elbows on the table. Katya knew what was coming, and she both hated and liked the plan. 

Yelena suspected something else was about to come out of her mouth, and warned Natasha teasingly. ''Don't.''

''Don't what?'' she smirked innocently. Always the tease. 

Yelena lightly glared at her. ''You're going to give me some big hero speech, I can feel it.''

Katya chuckled, directing their attention to her. ''Speeches aren't really her thing,'' she joined in lazily, slowly drinking her beer, eating her chips, and watching the people around them. If she wanted speeches, she should have called Cap. Natasha could make people feel better, but those weren't really speeches. 

''Huh.'' Yelena looked surprised by that. She took the hero thing a bit too far. 

Natasha didn't argue with that. ''It was more like an invitation,'' she smirked. She hadn't discussed this with Katya, but didn't need to. They could hardly leave Yelena behind and go blow the Academy up without her.

''To go to the Red Room and kill Dreykov?'' Yelena muttered, staring at the bottle of beer that she had clenched between two hands. Katya hadn't seen her take one sip of it though.

''Yeah.''

''Even though the Red Room is impossible to find and Dreykov is too slippery to kill?'' she continued, summing up all the reasons this could get hard. Her eyes flickered between both women in front of her, but Natasha was the one leading this conversation, speaking for the both of them. The only person Katya would let speak for her.

Natasha knew all these things already and kept smiling smugly. ''Yeah.'' She was really looking forward to this mission, wasn't she?

''That sounds like a shitload of work.'' Her dry tone caused Katya to chuckle again, another chip landing in her mouth.

''Yup.'' Natasha agreed, enjoying herself and this conversation. Her smile, her real smile, made Katya happy. ''Could be fun, though.''

A smile finally spread on Yelena's lips as well. ''Yup.'' 

And like that, she agreed to go with them. The more the merrier wasn't always correct, but in this case, Katya was glad to have backup. And backup who knew the place. They wouldn't be going in completely blind.

Her chips were all gone, so she turned back to her drink, fully relaxing against the backrest. It hadn't cooled down yet, despite the dark sky, and she actually started to get warm in her leather jacket. That might also be the cheap lights above their heads that emitted so much warmth. Couldn't be safe really.

Natasha eyed the - now dark - workshop on their right, where the guy worked on his sportscar previously. The kids that ran around were his, and he had taken them inside a couple minutes ago, bathing the place in darkness. It was begging to be robbed, basically. 

''I saw where he put the keys,'' the redhead smirked to her sister. Begging to be robbed by three spies, apparently.

Yelena mirrored her expression. ''Top drawer, green cabinet.''

Katya sighed and shook her head. ''''You can't just steal a guy's car'','' she imitated Natasha's words from before, using a childish voice she knew she would hate. It earned her a laugh from Yelena and a shove from Natasha, which almost caused her to spill her beer over her clean-ish shirt.

''She's such a hypocrite, isn't she?'' Yelena played along with Katya's teasing, side-eyeing Natasha, who slumped her shoulders because she knew exactly what was happening. Her wife and sister teaming up against her.

''Oh, absolutely,'' Katya nodded, her eyes lighting up mischievously. ''You'd think she's all 'follow the rules, we're Avengers', and told me off for stealing a bottle of wine, like, a couple cities back. But in the meantime, she threatens gas station employees for free gas when we're out of money.''

''What? How many times did she manage that?'' Yelena chuckled, drinking her beer slowly, Natasha's expression slowly growing exasperated. Yeah, wasn't so fun when you're the aim of the teasing now, was it?

''Like three times. And all I did was snatch some wine off the shelves and not pay because I wanted to enjoy something good for once.''

Yelena shook her head in disapproval, letting her back hit the plastic chair. ''So typical.''

''Alright, alright,'' Natasha cut them off tiredly, fighting off a smile. ''I think I don't like where this is going.'' She sighed when Katya and Yelena chuckled, feeling this team-up against her starting to form. And although she acted like she hated it, she loved seeing Katya and Yelena interact so easily. They held no hostility against each other.

''I like her,'' Yelena's heavily accented voice said to Natasha, like Katya wasn't right there. ''Did I say that already?'' 

Katya perked up and smiled, throwing her a bag of snacks from the pile. It was nice to have approval from her, especially if it was mutual. ''You can say that as much as you want.''

~~~~~~~~

A/N: only this chapter for you today. Already had this written out so I just had to check everything :) Consider this a thank you for all your amazingly sweet comments on the break I'm taking. I'm doing a bit better. Hanging in there <3