“everyone wants to leave a mark
but at what cost, we must decide —”

Put yourself in my shoes.

Try to understand what I'm going through.

Mijung's words rang in her ears as Migyung danced.

She had been so disturbed since last evening when Mijung decided to drop several bombs on her. She couldn't decide what she was feeling exactly.

She had been angry at first for being accused when it was she who had lost everything. And then she had been sad to know that Mijung had been hurt somewhere too. She had done it all just so she wouldn't be sad. And despite thinking she didn't care about her, it was proving to be a lie.

She fell suddenly, a jump gone wrong as her thoughts spiralled out of control. She cried out, clutching her ankle tightly and shutting her eyes as a sharp pain seared through her leg. Tears pricked the back of her eyes and she tried to breathe through the pain.

It wouldn't be the first time she had twisted her ankle but at this moment, with all the emotions she'd been going through and trying to deal with her past, her painful groans turn into a full sob. Her body curved into herself, her arms hugging her body as she cried in the dance studio, in her empty apartment.

It took her a long time to calm down. With her eyes finally dry and her ankle numb, she felt the exhaustion pull at her but she couldn't give in. Not until she figured everything out. And she knew only one person could help her.

Migyung has been to Heejung's apartment only a handful of times. Mostly to avoid bumping into Mijung by accident. But that afternoon, she made sure it was only him in his apartment.

He greeted her with a cheeky smile and a cigarette pack.

"I'm paying you back, Kim. Our accounts are settled," he said as he ushered her inside.

She laughed, pocketing the pack and taking a seat on the sofa. She usually got comfortable pretty quickly but she was high-strung enough to keep her legs on the floor.

Heejung noticed it all and jumped to the topic because he knew any delay would only wind her up more. Hence, he took her hand in his and squeezed it encouragingly.

"Talk to me, Migyung."

She blew out a breath and looked at the protective way he held her hand. He had always been someone she could trust and depend on without complicating things. She loved that about their relationship.

And with that trust, she told him about Mijung's visit and everything she said to her. He listened to her attentively although she could tell he knew everything already. But he let her talk, get it all off her chest.

When she was done, he passed her a glass of water which she downed quickly.

"I'm trying to understand what exactly happened but I just can't figure it out. What did I do?" she asked, her hands messing up her hair in frustration.

Heejung paused. He had the answers to her questions and he knew it was the truth. He had seen and experienced it all first-hand but he needed her ready to accept it.

"You have to promise me, Migyung," he said, grabbing both of her hands this time. "Promise me you will listen to me carefully and with an open mind. You need to get your head out of your ass and really listen, okay?"

She stared at him blankly, her teeth nibbling her lower lip nervously. But she was ready. It was in the way her grip on his hands tightened.

"Tell me. Don't sugarcoat anything."

He nodded and squeezed her hand once again as he started talking. "I'm going to tell you a story of two sisters. Born together, raised together, loved together. One of them is a gifted dancer, the other is not. The gifted dancer shines brightly like a sun, enchanting everyone with her magic but the other sister… The other sister stays in the shadows. She is just as mesmerizing but not bright enough to overpower the sun. She can't shine the way the other sister does. She can only live in her sister's shadow."

He paused for a moment, gauzing her reaction and he knows that she knows he was reciting their story. Her nod tells him to go on and so, he does.

"The shadows have a way of eating you away, little by little. No matter what you feel, no matter your morals, the shadows start to dominate when you've been shrouded in them for so long. You become the shadow. The sister becomes the shadow and she gets triggered by the smallest things. In this case, because of a boy…"

The boy Mijung had liked who he had only tried using her to get to Migyung. The realisation makes her pulse quicken.

"She gets angry, blaming her sister that she gets nothing because of her. Not the boy she likes, not the praises of her mother, not the centre stage. She only gets compared to her sister, torn apart for every little mistake she makes. Her life becomes miserable and she blames no one but her sister, the gifted one. So, she tells her to give it up, to let her take the centre stage because she is tired of being the backup in case something happens to the other sister. Tell me, Migyung, if it was you, what would you do? Would you be able to live in the darkness forever, never being praised for your efforts, never being recognised as yourself but Mijung's sister? What would you do? And why have you been so blind about it this whole time?"

Heejung paused, anger seeping into his voice. He took a few deep breaths, noticing the devastation on Migyung's face. Her face was so similar to Mijung, yet so different.

"Look, no one blames you for doing what you love. Mijung knows how much you love dancing and every moment of her life she has hoped to love something the way you do dancing. It broke her every time you were on the stage and she was not. She just-"

"She wanted attention," Migyung completed his words. Her eyes were far away, remembering every time she won a competition and Mijung didn't. She remembered the way she would get unintentionally ignored by their teachers, and their parents because they were more focused on her.

Mijung was all alone. All this time.

Migyung's eyes closed painfully, her hands clammy and her throat suddenly too dry.

She got up, hands falling away from his. He looked up at her with worried eyes, seeing her look so devastated.

"I—" she paused, licking her dry lips and looking around herself. Her throat was so dry and her head was starting to spin. "Thank you, Heejung. For answering my questions. I need to think about it alone."

He nodded in understanding, getting up and hugging her tightly. "I know it's a lot," he said, pulling away to look into her eyes. "But I need you to know that it's not your fault. It's not her fault. It just turned out like this and it's not too late to make things right, okay?"

She nodded jerkily. "Got it. I still need time, so I'm just gonna leave now."

"Okay. Be safe, Migyung and for god's sake, call me or text me when you reach home. You never listen to me but you should know I say it because I'm worried about you."

Migyung grinned, grateful for his presence in her life for the umpteenth time. If he wished and considering his unconditional and unchanging love for Mijung, he could have easily hated her, much like Heejae hated Mijung. But he didn't. He chose to be there for both of them in different ways.

"Alright, future brother-in-law. I'll text you."

He smiled wide at her choice of words and pushed her playfully, making her laugh as she left his apartment but it died down as soon as the door closed behind her.

She needed a drink.