On the bus to Ringwood I dialed my best friend Emily. Eight years ago we'd both started teaching English at the same language school, had become roommates until I'd gotten married, and had stayed close ever since.

She would rejoice at the news.

Emily had always hated The Fool from the first moment she'd set eyes on him. If I recall correctly, her exact words were, "He's an entitled, pompous, arrogant momma's boy."

It turned out she was right.

When my business had flourished, I didn't mind being the breadwinner to let him pursue his dreams. After the accident, though, it had been his turn to step up, get a real job, and take care of me. Of us. Once he'd failed to reciprocate, it had become clear to me that we would never become true, equal partners.

On that day I'd lost all respect for him.

The phone rang three times before she picked up. "Hey, Vee! Have I got news for you!"

"So do I," I said. "But you first."

"Nah, it's just about my lame-ass roommate." Emily gave a wry chuckle. "You first! You sound excited as hell."

"It happened." A half-smile curled my lip as the bus bumped along the highway. "I took the leap."

Emily drew an excited breath. "You dumped his ass?"

Cue the dramatic pause.

"I dumped his ass."

Silence. In the background I could have sworn I heard her muted squee.

"Wait, for real?" she asked. "As in the classic stick-me-with-a-fork-I'm-done?"

"Yep, for real." It was a fair question. We'd broken up about five times already. "Packed my passport, my clothes, my degrees, and tax and employment records dating back ten years."

"Daaaamn!" She inhaled a breath through her teeth. "Are you moving back to America?"

"Not if I can help it." I grabbed hold of the empty seat in front of me as the bus made a hard right turn. "I didn't earn this settled status for nothing."

"So, what's the plan?" she asked in an excited tone.

"First things first, I need to find an apartment. And some more reliable clients if I can."

"Yaaas! Move your ass back to my place."

"Thank you for the offer, but—"

"You'd be closer to all the language schools and the university," reasoned Emily. "We have better transport in the city. More amenities. We can go networking together."

"I couldn't possibly inconvenience you—"

"Girl, you've become too British!" Emily had perfected a kind of fake anger that still managed to terrify me. "Besides, I need a new roommate who can help pay these bills."

Say what now?

I furrowed my brow. "What happened to Ashley?"

"Freakin' Ash-hole can kiss my freakin' ash!"

"That good, huh?"

"Girl went to London and bought some fancy-pants shit at some fancy-pants store," she growled. "Meanwhile I'm here carrying all the damn rent and utilities."

"Sounds disturbingly familiar."

"Right?" She blew a raspberry. "Ash-hole didn't pay me Jack Crap for six months."

Wow! That's even worse than The Fool.

Impressive. Didn't realize that was possible.

"I would, like, totally pay you," Emily whined, faking a Valley Girl accent. "But, like, check out this cute dress. O-M-G, it makes my boobs look, like, amazing." She returned to her typical harsh contralto. "Stupid donut."

I scrunched my face. "Jesus H. Murphy, she sounds awful."

"Jesus has got nothing to do with it." Emily groaned. "More like Daddy's bank account."

"Barftastic."

"Funny how Daddy could never afford the essentials."

"Ain't that always the way?"

Emily chuckled. "After three warnings I kicked her ass out and threw all her clothes and crap out the window. Including the damned dress."

"Ah, gotta love the classic jilted lover trope."

"Dude, don't even." Emily scoffed. "Ash-hole should be so lucky."

I stifled a giggle. Dude, wish I had your confidence.

"Sounds like now might not be a good time."

"Don't worry. She moved out yesterday. You're in the clear."

I hummed in thought. It tempted me—not gonna lie—moving back to Bournemouth and being as close to a bustling city as possible in rural Dorset.

"So, you comin'?" she asked.

"Thank you so much for the offer, but to be honest..." My cheeks burned with embarrassment. "Well, I'm not sure I can afford it."

"If you could contribute a hundred a month till you get back on your feet, it would help."

"Nah, we'd have to split it half-half," I insisted. "Fair is fair."

No way would I use Emily the same way my ex had used me.

My ex. I exhaled a sigh of relief. Damn, that sounds good.

"That'd be four hundred a month," she said in a hesitant tone. "You sure that's cool?"

"Perfect, that's half of what I pay now."

If only my ex had agreed to a similar plan I'd suggested months ago, I could have pulled us out of debt within a year or two. Alas, it took my best friend to make it happen.

Her tone cheered right up. "So, you'll do it?"

"Yes, you're amazing! Thanks, Em."

"Text me when you're at the station, Vee."

We both gave an excited squee before I hung up the phone.

During our call my ex had sent me several texts. All quite reasonable, of course. As rational as a dinosaur with unicorn wings flying through an event horizon and arriving at the other end perfectly unharmed.

Why did he always go bat-crap crazy under stress? Here I was—the emotional one—reacting with ice-cold detachment, reading his messages with a disgusted sneer.

Please call me! please Toria I love you.

You cant live me like this I need you!

Your important for me.

What you gonna do with the flat?
Your name is on the papers. Call me!

Talk to me! I can explain!

Please Toria don't leave!

With a heavy sigh I sent The Fool a curt message.

Worried that you'll have to pay rent?
Tell me: How does it feel?
Get used to it.

The phone buzzed, but I ghosted him.

Instead, I officially changed his designation on my phone from 'Thomas' to 'Dumbbutt'. 

___

Word count: 953
Total word count: 2,698

Woot! We hit the 2K milestone, so now I can calm down and post the chapters on a more regular basis. Thank you for your support so far. ♥