The numbers flashed. Talons clicked over the console. The algorithms fired off. Eyes darted to check the corresponding numbers. Yes, everything checked out so far. Mandibles shifted into a smirk.

Garrus broke himself away from his beloved console and rolled his neck until he heard it click. His visor display flashed the time and he winced. He'd been standing here for hours, just calibrating to make sure the main gun was firing right. It shouldn't be too difficult, and someone somewhere could probably tell Garrus he didn't have to calibrate it as faithfully as he did. But there was a method to the madness! The turian was hoping to catch Shepard's eye with an upgrade that would propel the power of the ship's weapons to the next level and beyond: the Thanix Cannons! The Turian Hierarchy had developed them shortly after the Battle of the Citadel, Garrus had managed to get a good look at a prototype before he'd left for Omega. Now, he wanted them in the Normandy, to give the old girl a fighting chance if she came upon a Collector Ship again. Shepard probably would agree to have them installed anyway. But Garrus tended to be a little pessimistic at times, so he wanted to prepare for if Shepard decided to be like his asshole superiors at C-SEC, who would only approve an upgrade if they knew he could take the extra workload. That was why he calibrated the main gun to perfection, he wanted to show that he was already doing the work, he just needed the actual gun to do it on.

The only downside, was that Garrus was getting lost in his work. This wasn't like the Mako that Shepard managed to ruin after scaling a mountain. He wasn't all over a machine attempting to fix hydraulics and suspensions and breaks. No, here he was stood at a console, crunching numbers and perfecting the programming. His mind was losing itself in the work, whilst his poor body was growing stiff. It was late, and he was beat.

His jaw and right mandible ached underneath his bandage. He longed to reach up and touch it, to rub the spot so the pain would lessen. But Chakwas had strictly ordered him to try not to aggravate it in any way. The repairs to his mandible were still settling, and if he wasn't careful he could make the potential scarring underneath worse.

He snorted to himself. Right, he thought sarcastically, just how exactly could it be worse? Garrus had never thought of himself as a vain man – aside from the jokes he used to have with Shepard. But to look in a mirror every day and see something like that... it was a little upsetting. Krogans found scars attractive. And whilst turians were also warriors and heavily devoted to their militaries, they still preferred physical attractiveness, like other species. Garrus looked like he'd gotten his face stuck in a meatgrinder by anyone's standards*.

He shook himself out of his pitiful thoughts and rolled the hinge of his jaw. Still the pain persisted. It had been like this some nights since his recovery. Usually all he needed was a dosage of meds from Chakwas and he was good. So, despite the time and that they were supposedly deep in the night-cycle of the ship, Garrus left the main battery and headed straight for the Medbay.

He was already speaking as he strolled through the unlocked door. "Hey, Doc, I was hoping you'd–"

CRASH!

Garrus only just had a mind to duck as something smashed apart into the wall right next to him. He whirled around, looking for the threat, mandibles flared to show his teeth as his instincts kicked in. But all he saw was an empty cold Medbay, save for its only occupant, Elaine. She stood glaring at him, her sides heaving.

Anger coursed through him as he straightened and stormed towards her. He'd had just about enough of her attacking him today. "What the hell do you think you're doing?! I–"

"Where is he?!" she hissed so savagely that Garrus had to pull up right in front of her, his steam cut short in the face of such fury. Only then did he get a good look at her. Her cheeks were blooming red, her golden hair was now let loose down her back in angry waves. She bared her teeth but her eyes were puffy and bloodshot; he could smell the salt of tears. She interrupted his observations when she took a menacing step towards him. "Your commander. Where is he?! I'm going to murder him!"

She spat the title like a curse. Garrus decided to play his cards carefully. He folded his arms over his chest and spoke indifferently with the greatest poker face he could muster. "What's your problem? What's he done to you?"

"What has he done?" she echoed in quiet outrage. Turning on her heel, she stormed back to the bed she had been sat on, and picked up a handful of datapads from a pile. "How about leaving me with this! Andthis! This! Andthis!"

With each hissed word, she flung them hard back onto the cot. They bounced from the force, and one came dangerously close to falling off to the floor. Garrus wondered if he should alert EDI or Shepard, or possibly even Yeoman Chambers, seeing as the woman was obviously close to a psychotic break. She was pacing frantically back and forth in front of him, hands running through her long hair. A wild animal, he realised was what she reminded him of, caged and ready to break free in a fit of panic.

"I've been sat here the past hours reading through each one. Your Shepard thought I needed to be re-educated in order to function aboard this...Ship! A ship that sails the stars!" she turned back to him, a look on her face as if the very words she'd just spouted were madness. "Where I come from, a ship sails on water – it doesn't wander from world to world!"

Garrus frowned. Wow, that had to be a really back-water planet if they'd regressed that far. "I don't understand..."

"I can't read anymore! If I do, I'll break! He's left me alone to realise that everything has changed around me, that nothing I know is right." She was speaking more to herself, a mutter of despair. As if realising that Garrus might be a rope to save her from drowning, she hurried back to the bed and held up one datapad after the other as she explained. "This one, tells me about towers amongst the stars that can propel someone to the other side of the night sky in an instant. This one, says there is not one world of life, but many. That toor-ee-ans, ass-ar-ee, sal-arr-eeans, all of you are not races, you're people – your own people from your own world. And then this one, tells me all about humans – except for the fact that I don't recognise any of the customs, places, or religions in it! All of these tomes-on-scrolls use words half of which I don't understand!"

Despite the fact that she was talking nonsense, Garrus couldn't help but feel a little sorry for her. He cleared his throat uncomfortably. This was so not his area of expertise. "I guess... someone could get lost in all that."

Finally, she seemed to lose her drive, and was left with nothing but fumes. Elaine collapsed onto the mattress, shoulders slumped and blue eyes distant. Her voice was hollow and sad. "There's nothing... I thought I would find some mention of where I come from. Something familiar. But all I realise is how alone I am in this cold place."

Damn it, he knew he shouldn't get involved. He didn't know the woman, much less trust her or think she trusted him to be of any help. But that pitiful way she held herself was just eating at his insides. "Okay... Shepard might've been a little off with leaving you to deal with this by yourself when you clearly seem distressed by it."

"A vast understatement." She snorted bitterly. "Did you know, Ser Garrus, that I am now his prisoner here? He has taken my possessions, and I assume he does not plan to release me to fight alongside you against the tainted monsters – the Collectors."

"Um, did Shepard tell you everything?" Garrus asked a little uncomfortably. "About what this mission actually is? The Collectors? The Reapers?"

"Yes. He did. I know exactly what is at stake."

"Can you blame him, then? Considering everything we're up against, I'd rather fewer people joined up for this fight. It'd mean less death in the end."

"Then why do you want to fight?"

"Shepard's my commander, my friend. I won't ever leave him; unlike Kaidan, I don't lose sight of the end goal because the particulars don't agree with me. I know what we're fighting for and I know what will happen if I don't – and I'm willing to pay the price. I don't see the point in staying quiet whilst the galaxy is at stake."

Her gaze was steady and commanding of his attention. "Then you know why I need to fight alongside you."

"Maybe... but it's not my call to make."

Something in her turned wistful, distant. "Do you think Shepard would at least return my weapons and armour to me? They belong to me, I need them back."

"You're that attached?"

"Would you allow anyone to mess with your weapons?" she asked. Garrus had to admit, she had a point there. If someone ever touched his rifle – or worse, his visor – without his expressed permission, he would've flipped a table in his anger. "It is an old Qunari wisdom that I found transcended into my own people: the weapon of a warrior is more than just an extension of their body. It is a part of your soul. That sword has been with me through many things, saved my life so many times. I don't feel whole – I don't feel safe – without it."

The conviction in her voice convinced him of the truth. Which was why he suggested rather truthfully: "I'll talk to Shepard. See what I can do."

"You would?" she echoed, eyes widening in surprise. He nodded, and her face softened into a small grateful smile. "Thank you."

"Um, no problem."

Elaine looked away in thought. "Perhaps my answer lies in these," she held up the nearest datapad. "Maybe your Shepard is right: I need to learn my way before he will allow me to fight. But how can you learn when the truth is so hard?"

Garrus took a little step closer. He didn't dare come too close, there was that barrier of unfamiliarity that prevented him from relaxing into that easy conversation. "Maybe, with all this... all you need is someone to soften the blow, as it were. I hear culture shock can be quite... shocking."

"Wasn't any of this surprising to you?" she quickly asked, turning to face him as if this imagined common quality would help to alleviate her shame. "You are not human, yet you must have been introduced to all of this."

Unfortunately, Garrus had to be the burst in her bubble, and shrugged. "Actually, I grew up learning the basics for all cultures in school. It's just everyday life. It's normal."

"I've had none of that. It is abnormal to me." She shook her head, brows cast down angrily. "How pathetic of me. Akin to a child – worse than a child."

"Well, maybe not." He tried to offer. "But to be honest, we're not perfect at this 'society' thing either."

"What do you mean?"

"You can be Hanar, Turian, Human, Batarian, and all have very different ideas about how it all works. Mostly, some of the things unique to us are left behind in favour of the benefit of what we're trying to build. The dream is to have a society where we all push to work together. Can't say that the dream is doing very well at getting here. But, if you've got that, you'll fit right in."

"But I know nothing. No culture, no laws, no social graces."

"Alright then: where you come from, do you have basic laws? No theft, murder or rape?"

"Yes," she nodded.

"You have to pay for things you want with currency?"

"Yes."

"Is slavery bad?"

"Of course!"

"Good, only the Batarians will really try to argue with us on that point." He inclined his head apologetically. His eyes found hers. "You see? You know plenty to get you through."

"And what happens when I see the impossible? Something my basic knowledge will not be able to explain?"

Garrus thought on that point, shifting from foot to foot. "Then you can always ask. My mother used to say: 'there's no shame in ignorance, only your stubbornness to remain in it.'"

"I like that." She nodded slowly. And then, something daring and light entered her tone, a test of waters. "And will you be my saviour? Come to rescue me from my ignorance when the time arises?"

"You'd ask me? I still haven't forgiven you for pointing a sword at my throat."

"Oh dear," she winced, "I am sorry about that..."

"How can you go so quickly from nearly decapitating me, to being this level of civil with me. I mean, there's not even suspicion, at least?"

"Should I? You aren't a demon, as I thought you were. You might not be a race I recognise, but even these scrolls have told me your people are just as sentient as my own. And despite the fact I did threaten your life, here you are. Comforting me. Why should I repay that with contempt when all you have done is earn my thanks and comradery?"

Garrus honestly didn't have a reply for that one. He'd expected her to distrust him because he was so alien to her. He'd thought she would avoid him, treat him with suspicion and contempt. Yet the thought never crossed her seemingly naïve mind. No one in the galaxy would ever be so stupid as to freely trust another person after only knowing them a few hours. Elaine was like a child in that respect, and Garrus knew that many less honourable minds would've taken advantage of her if they could. Yet here she was and didn't appear to stupid in the slightest whilst doing it.

But why was he talking to her? Never mind that she was talking to him, why was Garrus getting involved? He'd just come here to get his meds. He didn't know this woman, he didn't trust her, the only time they'd had in each other's company outside of the ship was when she was threatening his life and insulting him. Was it because talking with her just felt easy? It was like Shepard used to do back in the old days, but who now hardly came by, pent up in his quarters doing paperwork and avoiding all contact with those he'd once thought of as friends – even Joker was making comments. So was Elaine a replacement for something Garrus desperately wanted back; an ear, a friend? Whatever. It didn't matter. Analysing the situation had just sucked the ease out of the room and the tension had swept right back in to encase him. He should just return to the battery, this was stupid.

Apparently, his sudden awkwardness was noticeable to her as well. "Ser Garrus–"

"Please, no sir. it's just Garrus."

"Garrus..." she murmured his name, as if testing out the sound of it on her tongue. She stood and slowly approached him. Though she didn't reach out to touch him, her gaze was sincere. "I mean it. Thank you. For calming me – Maker's breath, just talking to me. It was something I desperately needed, and I owe you for it."

Was there something in the way she spoke? Garrus felt the easy urge to talk to her, a need to bridge the silence between them, and retorted wittily. "It's not like it was completely unentertaining, hearing you mispronouncing names."

"I did?"

"I'm never gonna be able to look at a hooker again without hearing 'ASS-ar-ee'." They both chuckled at that. And then Garrus felt his awkwardness return again as the laughter died and he realised he had nothing to say. The proper thing to do was to leave her to sleep, to go back to his quarters, to be professional. In regard to his sense of protocol, he could probably say he was at least a competent turian. "I'm, uh, glad you're alright now, though. You know."

"Yes, thank you."

"Err, right then. You know where Chakwas is?"

"The healer? She retired to her chambers an hour ago."

"Not to worry – I know where she keeps her stash." He made his way to Chakwas' desk drawers and pulled open the middle draw. He saw many sample medicines, but plucked out a specific purple-dextro bottle. He held it up to the light triumphantly. "Ah, gift of the spirits: painkillers!"

Elaine's gaze turned curious. "For the scars? How did you get those...?"

"I should go." Garrus quickly interrupted and could've kicked himself for the third time today for having as much tact as Shepard normally used whenever he said that horrid sentence.

She seemed to realise what he'd done and dropped the subject. Though her calculating eyes made it clear the issue was far from dropped. "Oh, very well. Goodnight, Garrus."

"Goodnight, Elaine."

----------------------------------

The next morning, Elaine mostly watched through the infirmary window the comings and goings on of this strange metal 'ship' – if that is what it truly was. Her body clock adjusted easily, and though the Dr Chakwas had explained to her that there was technically no sunrise or evening on board the ship, they still rotated their days as if it were. Elaine couldn't quite wrap her head around a world where a sunrise didn't exist, so did as Garrus had suggested to her and pushed it from her mind until it could be dealt with later. So she awoke when her mind had told her that it was just before 'dawn', which meant that she was awake before Dr Chakwas came to rouse her.

The good doctor had brought clothing, a spare set of her own uniform, a long-sleeved and high collared tunic and leggings with black boots. Elaine accepted the gift with great appreciation. Whilst being on the road and living like a soldier had meant she had no shame of her body, she had still grown up as one of the nobility, so a part of her mind couldn't fathom being so bodily exposed all the time. However, she was a little... uncomfortable. The previous evening, Chakwas had taken one look at her breast-bindings and undergarments, muttered a rather loud "how primitive!" and had thrown them away. Whether she expected Elaine to use other clothing for her unmentionables, she did not say nor provided any replacement. The Grey Warden was willing to bare the friction until she could reach a merchant, but that didn't mean she had to be happy about it.

As she watched the people of the ship come and go on their busy rounds, Elaine did her best to listen without being noticed. She had to learn everything she could about this place, what might've brought her here and how she was going to get home. To the others it might seem as if she was passively accepting incarceration, but she was far from it.

Her research the previous evening had truly shaken her. So much information, she'd been overloaded with it soon after starting and had to stop. But what she had been able to pick up, was that it threw her theory of being shot forward in time out the window. There was no mention of Fereldan, or Blights, or Darkspawn, or Thedas, or even the Maker! She'd scanned these peoples calendar, back through the years, tens of thousands of years, but had found nothing akin to anything she recognised. So if she wasn't in the future, then... where was she?

Blood pounded in her skull, and her breathing quickened with panic momentarily. Calm, she thought. The child of Bryce Cousland did not cower when the odds grew great. There had to be a solution to this problem. She had come through the door to this world, and doors worked both ways. All she had to do was bide her time, learn what she could, and find her way back.

That wasn't to say that what she had promised to Shepard, spoken of to Garrus, her pledge to fight the Collectors, was a lie. No. She fully intended to carry out that oath. However, she couldn't rely on Shepard to find her a way home; she had never been a woman to let others decide her fate for whilst she did nothing. She was a woman of action, of finding solutions to problems. It was what she did best. And the best method of that, was to listen, learn, investigate and put the pieces together. The only way she would be able to do that, was if she observed this great new world, learned its magic and science – no matter how daunting it might be – and gained the trust of those within it. Only then would she find the chink in the armour, discover the truth and plot her course home.

So one could imagine the grand opportunity that presented itself to the Hero of Ferelden, when a bouncy ginger-haired girl came bounding into the infirmary. She was a woman of great animation and over-eagerness that bordered on ever-so-slightly-annoying. Introducing herself as Kelly Chambers, it was very easy for Elaine to listen to the woman prattle on as she instinctively talked and walked, leading Elaine out of the infirmary.

"I thought I'd give you the tour of the ship." Kelly smiled so wide all of her front teeth could be seen. "You might as well know your way around."

Elaine nodded. She'd tied her golden hair back into a low bun, though one stubborn lock kept falling in front of her eyes no matter how many times she pushed it back. "Indeed."

"The Normandy SR2 is larger than the average frigate class ship. We have four decks; your currently on deck 3, the Crew Deck. Here is mostly where the crew is stationed. I suppose you'll spend most of your time either here or on deck 2, the CIC."

"CIC?" Elaine frowned.

Kelly nodded and promptly elaborated. "Combat-Information-Centre. Up there is where we plot navigation, it holds the armoury and the tech-lab, and basically where all the important decisions are made." They came out into the main area that Elaine could watch through her window in the infirmary. Kelly grinned and spread her arms open wide in proclamation. "Ah! Here we are! This is the mess hall, where you can eat, with our lovely Mess Sergeant Gardner as your chef."

A square-set man, with balding dark hair stood behind a counter. Silver cupboards and fonts were behind him, and he lounged there scrubbing the top with the same enthusiasm as he might scrub a privy. At hearing Kelly's voice, he looked up, and warily watched Elaine approach. When he spoke, his voice was more of a grouch. "Mornin' miss,"

"Good day, Serah." Elaine nodded her head politely.

"I'm just showing Elaine round the ship," Kelly announced proudly.

As if understanding, the tension in the Gardner man eased and a friendly smile took its place. "Ah, then why don't ya try some of my grub, whipped it up fresh this morning – try a bite!"

He whipped out a spoon from one of his big silver pots and held it out to Elaine. Kelly winced and moved to intercede. "Oh, I really wouldn't–"

Too late. Elaine swallowed the mouthful. She chewed quietly in thought. The texture was not unpleasant, but the flavour was a little lacking. All low hum with no pay off. It wasn't bad cooking, by any means, just... boring. "Hmm, better than Alistair's cooking, at least."

Gardner's smile became confused. "Why thanks... I think."

"Let's move on!" Kelly said hurriedly. She directed Elaine's attention away from the cook by pointing down a long corridor to their right, lined with metal pods. At the end of the hall was a closed door, the usually green box that floated in front of it was turned to red. "Down there is the Forward Battery, that's where Mr Vakarian works on his 'calibrations'." Kelly couldn't keep in a girly giggle. She leant towards Elaine, her voice dropping to a near whisper. "Between you and me, there's something about his bad-boy-brooding that just makes women like us melt."

This was the point that Elaine could no longer take the woman beside her seriously. Elaine had known enough gossiping girls that swooned over the handsome knights back at court. She hadn't cared for it then, and she didn't really care for it now. So instead, she rolled her eyes and pretended to go along with it, though her voice did drip in the slightest sarcasm. "Really..."

"Okay, then." Kelly seemed to pick up on her impatience and moved on the tour. They came back through the mess hall, and the room opposite the infirmary was pointed out. "Over there is the XO's office; it's where Miranda works. I wouldn't disturb her if I were you. Down here is the elevator, it can take you to any of the levels on the ship – provided you have clearance."

"Clearance?"

"Yes, like deck 1 – the Captain's quarters. That's where the Commander sleeps. No one's allowed up there unless strictly invited."

"What about the 4th deck you mentioned?"

"Oh, engineering, that holds all the engines and the drive-core. I don't think you'd like to head down there – you might just get in the way. Other than that, all there is to see is the cargo hold. That's where we–"

"I know what a cargo hold is, Miss Chambers." Elaine couldn't stop herself this time from snapping just a little with her impatience. Maker, she might not be up to date with this time, but that did not mean she was a simpleton! It would grow very annoying very quickly if people here continued to treat her as such.

Kelly seemed to realise her blunder, and her brows turned up in apology. "Oh, o-of course. Follow me, and I'll show you to the observation decks o–"

"Chambers!"

The voice cracked like a whip down the hall. Kelly jumped, her spine going ram-rod straight. Elaine merely turned, every part of her controlled to the maximum as she watched Shepard march towards them, his expression thunderous. His eyes briefly flickered to Elaine, before settling on Kelly. When he stopped in front of them, he folded his arms across his chest and glared at the woman. She meekly bowed her head to stare intently at the floor as if it were the most interesting thing in the world.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Shepard asked, though his tone betrayed the anger he tried to pull off. He sounded more like an exasperated parent then anything else.

Kelly wet her lips nervously. "Well, Commander, I was just showing Elaine around the ship. Seeing as she's going to be staying here and all–"

"Aren't you supposed to be on duty?"

"Miss Chambers holds a valid point, Commander." Elaine spoke out, attempting to restrain the twitch of her lips. She met the commander's gaze unflinchingly when he turned his stare on her. "I mean, if I am taking up residence aboard your ship, I will need to know how to care for myself. Unless of course, you would rather keep me confined to the infirmary, in which case you'll need to assign someone to bring me food, bathe me, show me to the facilities, etc. So either Miss Chambers fulfils that role – of which I greatly regret taking up her time away from duties that might make her more useful to you – or you could do it. Seeing as you're already here and appear to be doing nothing."

His brows came down over his eyes in disapproval. "I'll have you know that I was on my way t–"

She grinned back at him. "Splendid. You can give me the quick tour on your way."

"I'm not doing that."

"Oh, how disappointing. Miss Chambers, I'm afraid it's just going to be me and you. I know you would more enjoy this, so let's take the more in depth tour."

Her eyes never once left Shepard's. Her politician's smile never wavered. Shepard's cheek bunched where he bit the inside of his mouth. He looked extremely annoyed and Elaine drank in the victory of it. At length, Shepard ground out: "Kelly, return to your post."

"Yes, Commander..." the yeoman mumbled and scurried out of their sights faster than if an Archdemon were nipping at her heels.

"Follow me." Shepard said stiffly and marched away.

Elaine nodded airily. "Certainly."

"For now, you'll stay in the Medbay for sleeping quarters–"

"Rather impersonal, don't you think? One could almost be forgiven for thinking it to be a prison cell."

"What, would you rather stay in the crew quarters?" he demanded with a look over his shoulder. Before she could answer, he dismissed it with a wave of his hand. "Fine. Whatever. All you need to know is where you eat, sleep and shit. For now, I want you kept on the Crew Deck."

"All this room to explore? My, what luxurious accommodations your making for me, Shepard. Iam impressed." This time, she made sure her voice was drowning in sarcasm.

Shepard wheeled around to glare straight into her eyes. "Aboard this ship, you will address me as 'Commander'."

"That would imply that I allow you to wield the authority to direct me." Her smile was gone, her voice matching his low growl. She would not bow to him. "I do not. Especially not when you seem content to squander my talents by keeping me a prisoner. Shepard."

They scowled at each other for minutes on end. Neither would give in, two dominants unwilling to relinquish the power they'd known all throughout their lives. Yet it was Shepard who seemed tired of the games. Without breaking eye contact, he pointed to three separate locations around them. "Crew's quarters are over there, get your meals from Gardner, and ladies restroom is over there. Anything else, you're on your own."

And without so much as a farewell, he dismissed himself from her presence. Elaine watched him step around the corner in the box that Kelly and others had called the 'elevator'. And then he was gone. Briefly, Elaine wondered if what she'd done, intentionally provoking him, was wise or just childish. She regretted goading him, when it appeared he did hold at least some authority over her. It would be his choice that would release her from this confinement, to see her property returned to her and to see her fighting on the battlefield once more. But then she reminded herself that his was the decision to take those freedoms from her in the first place. So in kind, she would be extremely difficult so as to show him what a bad decision he'd made.

Walking down the corridors, she came to a door set into the wall that slid away at her approach. Inside was a room of silver, with facilities that most confused her. She stepped inside, determined to learn of it.

A disembodied feminine voice floated around her. "The female facilities are on the other side of the ship, Miss Cousland."

Elaine startled and spun, fists grasping for a weapon that was not there. When she saw a silver-white glowing ball pop up on the wall at her elbow, she leapt backwards. It took a good few minutes to get over her shock and come to terms with what she was seeing. "Maker... a spirit..."

"Correction," said the voice, and lines danced across the glowing ball in time with the words. "While I am a non-physical entity, I am not a ghostly apparition. I am an AI housed within the Normandy. The crew calls me EDI."

"EDI? And you... possess this ship?" Elaine asked uncomfortably. She had never heard of such a thing. Usually spirits and demons could only infect bodies that suited their purpose to see the mortal world.

"No." the voice – EDI it called itself – said matter-of-factly. "I am connected to the Normandy, but my shackles prevent me from taking full control. I am designed to help the Normandy during navigation and cyberwarfare combat. Other than this, I am here to help the crew in any way I possibly can."

"Very well..." Elaine said though she hardly understood what that all meant. A spirit as a servant, as a part of the ship? This place just became stranger and stranger with every passing hour. In a bid to talk to the spirit in an attempt to not appear rude, Elaine tried to come up with some realm of conversation. "So is this the privy?"

"This is the men's restroom. The female equivalent is down the hall."

"Why must there be a difference?"

"For privacy. Organics, especially humans, have strict rules about fraternisation. Whilst this is technically not a military vessel, there are still distinctions between certain facilities that allow for privacy when it comes to hygiene."

Curious, Elaine walked back out of the room and moved down the hall until she was at an identical door. When the door opened at her presence, she stepped inside... and slumped, disappointed. The two rooms looked exactly the same.

"EDI...?" Elaine looked behind her to see if the floating bubble had followed her, but saw no trace of it. Had it stayed in the other room.

Yet again, her voice sounded all around her. "Yes, Miss Cousland?"

Elaine startled again with a yelp, spinning to see the ball on the wall beside as she had been in the other room. "Ah! How are you here already? Did you get ahead of me?"

"I am everywhere aboard the Normandy. I can see you through the security cameras, hear your voice via the comm. channels and listening devices. These terminals act merely as ways for organics to feel as if they are physically interacting with me. This way I can know of everything that happens aboard the Normandy, and report directly to Commander Shepard."

"You can speak to him, even now? Relay messages?"

"Of course. Is there anything in particular you would like me to say?"

An evil smile glinted across the Grey Warden's face. Yes, she was a woman grown, yes perhaps it was childish, but this was too good of an opportunity to miss. Elaine had been the youngest sibling once in her lifetime, and a youngest sibling always knew how to annoy the eldest with the greatest effect. "Tell him I require his servants to draw a bath for me."

"You can do that via a shower."

"A shower?"

"Yes. At the cubicles on the far wall are buttons which summon water to the spouts in the ceiling. They provide clean recycled water for your bathing uses." EDI provided helpfully.

"Tell Shepard I need instructions on how these 'shou-wuh-ers' work."

"But I just told you–"

"Just relay the message to him." she said, and then added softer, more politely: "Please, EDI."

There was a moment of pause, and then the feminine voice spoke again. "Done. He is confused and I believe compiling a correct response."

"Good. Now, quickly tell him I require assistance on where to find a privy."

"The toilets are–"

"I know. Just ask him."

Another pause, and when EDI's voice returned, she sounded a little confused. "Certain indications suggest the commander is become extremely uncomfortable with your line of inquiry."

"Excellent. Now tell him I have changed my mind on bathing. Inform him that his staff has deprived me of undergarments, and require fresh ones immediately. I want you to make it expressly obvious the pains my body is going through, and how he could tremendously help me."

Another, far longer pause this time. "Now he has become angry. I quote: 'tell her to stop this shit – it's not funny!' I do believe Mr Moreau, however, does find it funny." Could Elaine be lying but did the spirit sound ever so slightly amused by this? There was a thoughtful silence, and then EDI spoke with an ever so slight accusation yet admiration. "I now realise you are trying to have me purposefully annoy the Commander."

"No, EDI." Elaine smiled innocently. "The Commander wishes for me to stay on this ship. So I wish for you to inform him of all my activities so that he can be assured I am doing just that. And I do mean all my activities."

"Very well, Miss Cousland."

-----------------------------------

After an hour of this, Elaine decided to end her fun and gave the spirit EDI a much-deserved break. She wondered instead if she could annoy Shepard by simply entertaining herself in other ways aboard his ship. So she decided to explore this privy room. She was most interested in these mysterious showers. The way EDI had described it made it sound like a waterfall contained within pipework and commanded at the pressed of buttons and pull of levers. She wondered if she had the chance to get clean herself, seeing as she hadn't properly bathed since arriving on Horizon.

She pressed the button, thinking that maybe the miniature pipe-work would need time to summon the water and get it hot to her specifications. However, she was completely unprepared for the immediate response. In that same instant, water shot from the spout above her, dousing her in liquid warmth. Elaine shrieked and stumbled out of the deluge, scrambling to not get her clothes wet. In her haste to retreat, her hip hit the bowl of a metal-privy, her back thumping against a button behind her. The bowl beneath her roared and she felt the suction of air. Elaine startled and jumped up, only to stumble into something right in front of her.

"Whoa, easy there!" came a voice from thin air.

Battle instincts sprang to life. Elaine's arms shot out and ensnared a body that she couldn't see. With a yell, she wrestled it to the ground, pinning it down by straddling its waist. Her fist drew back, but before she could strike, the air fizzled, crackled and then popped away. The figure of a woman draped in black with a hood drawn around her face lay underneath Elaine, hands splayed up in an attempt to parlay.

"Easy!" the voice cried. Elaine judged her assailant, studied the look of panic in those shadowed eyes. It was a look she knew well, a trickster that had meant no harm in their pranks, just fun. She'd seen it so many times when little Oren had tried to make her jump. Elaine closed her eyes and the familiar ache in her chest... poor little Oren... Softened, Elaine stood and held out a hand to the woman below to lift her to her feet. Despite being wrestled and nearly beaten to a pulp, said woman was grinning. "Wow, great reflexes. It's not often someone catches me."

"Who are you?" Elaine asked, eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"Pssh, where are my manners?" the woman tutted her own behaviour, and then bowed elaborately. "Kasumi Goto, at your service."

The Grey Warden relaxed her still-tense stance and nodded her head in return. "Elaine Cousland."

"Oh, I already know who you are, honey."

"You do?"

"People are talking," Kasumi grinned, the tip of her gloved finger tapping the end of her nose, "and I hear it all. You're the mystery woman Shepard found on Horizon, the girl who looks like she stepped out of another time – or that's what the boys chatting on navigation say."

"You have me at a disadvantage," Elaine managed, feeling a little awkward at how friendly this woman was being. It was why Elaine had never pursued a life of politics and much preferred combat. Despite the fact that her father had told her she'd had the silver-tongue able to talk the skin off a cat since she was five, and her adventuring companions had often said she was the ultimate epitome of diplomacy – Elaine was atrocious at small talk, at the light and simple conversations that was required of politics... and much of sociable affairs. Elaine was far too truthful, she told people exactly how she felt, and that made for poor politicking. "What is it you do aboard this ship?"

"Oh, I'm part of Shepard's 'team'," said Kasumi, "the one he's been preparing for this suicide mission we're all skipping towards. I am the best thief in the business."

"I can very well believe it, I've never seen someone have an ability to turn themselves completely invisible."

"And you have no problems with me just admitting to being a thief?" though everything from her nose upwards was consumed in shadow, Elaine managed to just about see one slim eyebrow cock with curiosity. "Don't know why, but I had you pegged as the 'honour above all else' kind of person."

Elaine smiled wistfully. "Kasumi, I have called thieves, murderers, assassins and apostates my friends as well as honourable men."

"Oooooooo, sounds like a good story there." Kasumi leaned forward, bouncing on her toes eagerly. "You'll fit right in with the Normandy crew. Shepard's pulling together quite the bunch for this mission."

"I doubt I'll even get to leave this part of the ship long enough to meet any of them."

"Well, lucky for you – you can do that right now!"

Before the Grey Warden could protest, Kasumi grabbed hold of her hand and dragged her back down the corridor towards the mess hall. In the time Elaine's antics had been going on, a small group had assembled at the table in the centre of the room. The woman, Miranda, Elaine thought she remembered correctly, the tall dark beauty, was speaking to man with a messy unkept stubble and rather thin and pasty complexion. Beside him sat a dark skinned man with muscles coiling and rolling beneath his silver and black uniform. Next to him was what Elaine had learned last night was a Salarian: tall thin creatures, with large eyes and mouths on a slim face. This one looked old with lines around said eyes and mouth, and one of the crest-horns atop his head was broken off. On the other side of the table with his back towards her was Garrus. Despite all the new faces, Elaine surprisingly felt a little calmer to see him there as Kasumi dragged her closer to the table.

"Shepard explicitly expressed his desire to set the course for Illium, Joker," Miranda said reproachfully to the man with the stubble and the strange-hats this world sported. "I suggest you go and get us there."

"Alright, alright, let me at least get a little bite first," said the man – Joker – with a gesture to his plate of mashed food Elaine couldn't quite identify.

"He can stay right there!" Kasumi nodded, earning everyone's attention. With a yank on Elaine's hand she thrust the woman closer to the group. "I want you all to meet Elaine Cousland!"

Elaine could've sworn her cheeks heated like a volcano as she withstood their stares at her. Joker and the dark-skinned man almost had their mouths hanging open as they looked her up and down. The Salarian cocked his head and studied her just as intently, but Elaine gathered not for the same reasons. Miranda looked down her nose at her, eyes narrowed with scrutiny. Elaine gulped as the silence stretched on. Andraste's flaming knickers! Why was she always put in such awkward situations? She never knew what to do!

Finally, it seemed Garrus was the only one to take pity on her. He looked at those also sat at the table, and shook his head with an exasperated sigh. "Come on, guys. She's not a Reaper, for crying out loud."

Joker whistled. "If they made them like that, I'd have to defect."

Miranda gave him a shrewd look. "Don't make me break your shin with a good kick."

"What? Jealous, Ice Queen?" the man chortled.

"Damn..." rumbled the dark-skinned man. "Commander sure knows how to pick 'em..."

"I assure you, Jacob, we did not pick her." Miranda corrected, not bothering to hide her contempt. Elaine got over her shyness in that moment in order to focus on the obvious hostility brewing within the other woman. But Miranda ignored her. "Professor Solus, this is the one the Commander was informing you about."

"Indeed. Received various test results from Chakwas. Nothing in depth. Will need own analysis." The Salarian – Solus, Miranda had called him – spoke so fast Elaine had to struggle to keep up with him. "Shepard expressed concerns over mental stability. Disorientation, lack of memory function, regressive use of technology. Subject mental function seems normal. Normal behavioural displays common for humans. Will need more tests. More data."

"And that, is the ever socially graceful Professor Mordin Solus," Kasumi sighed with an apologetic smile for Elaine. "Don't worry, his whole rambling-thing creeps everyone out. It's the method to his genius – also his madness."

"Yeah, don't mind him." said Jacob. He stood and reached across the table to offer his hand to her. "Hi, I'm Jacob Taylor."

Elaine reached out to him and grasped his hand firmly. "A pleasure."

"Err, hey? No one gonna introduce the cripple? Great guys, guess I know how PC you all are." Joker waved his arm about until attention was finally drawn to him. When he finally had Elaine's gaze, her smiled brightly with a bat of his eyelashes, though his voice was sarcastic. "I'm Joker, by the way, in case anyone was wondering. I'm the pilot – nothing important that needs an introduction, all I do is just fly the damn ship."

Miranda crossed her arms. "Which perhaps you should get back to."

"Come on, Miranda," said Garrus as he speared a fork full of a strange purple meat off his plate. "Let him have a little R&R."

Joker pointed to the turian. "See! Garrus gets it!"

"That's an order, Joker," Miranda snapped. "I won't have delicate matters discussed in our present company."

"Excuse me?" Elaine growled out, eyes narrowed to dangerous slits. "Does there seem to be a problem here, Miranda?"

Finally, the dark-haired woman gave Elaine her full attention. "A problem? Aside from the fact that I don't trust a word that comes out of your mouth?"

"And why is that?"

"You honestly expect me to believe your some lost-soul who just happened to be on Horizon at the time of a Collector attack? I don't think so. You're a spy. Either for the Collectors or the Alliance, I don't care. But I intend to get to the bottom of it."

"You think I'm a spy?" Elaine demanded in outrage. "That's quite the assumption."

"I'm never wrong. And as soon as I find what I'm looking for, I'll boot you out the nearest airlock myself."

Elaine grinned ferally. It was like Morrigan back in the beginning. This one had more bite, but she clearly had no idea who she was dealing with. "Go ahead. Try it. I don't intend to make it easy for you."

From somewhere off, Elaine was reminded of the others around them when she heard Joker whisper loudly: "Anyone filming this? It's not just me who thinks it's hot, right?"

Miranda scowled, turned on her heel and stormed away back to her office. The door closed right behind her and the little floating box glowed immediately red. Elaine rolled her eyes and stalked back towards Kasumi's side. As she passed Garrus, she felt his talons grasp hold of her wrist. Her gaze shot down to find his eyes on her face.

"You okay?" he asked softly.

Heat prickled beneath where he touched her, even through the fabric. Just like she had been the previous evening, she was touched by his want to calm her, comfort her, even when she probably didn't deserve it. "Y-Yes. I am. Thank you."

He released her and Elaine made it back to Kasumi, who was smiling. "I've never seen anyone stand up to Miranda like that – except for Jack, but that's more out of pending violence then tact."

"Yeah, I'm just gonna say again," pointed out Joker, "that was totally hot. Please do it a lot more."

"You better get back up there, Joker," Jacob murmured. "Miranda'll really gut you if you leave it off too long."

"Let him eat," Elaine said as she pulled out a chair beside Garrus, Kasumi sitting on her other side. "EDI told me she can navigate this ship, I'm sure our – pilot, is it? – can leave it to her capable hands."

There was a long silence. Everyong else at the table looked at Joker, who'd gone stiff. And then suddenly, he was standing and hobbling away from the table. "Okay, no way am I letting that thing fly my ship."

They watched him leave, limping his way around the corner towards the elevator. Elaine found herself wondering why he didn't walk correctly. She remembered him mentioning he was crippled, but how? It was something she would have to investigate later. She was pulled from her thoughts when Garrus turned to look at her, one of his mandibles pulled back to display his sharp teeth – Elaine didn't think it was an aggressive gesture. In fact, it looked a little like a lop-sided smirk.

"You did that on purpose, didn't you?" he asked, amused.

"I did nothing of the sort." She retorted. "Why do they call him 'Joker'? I didn't find anything he said funny. And how can a ship fly? I thought it sailed the stars."

Jacob's hand filled with a spoon full of soup stopped half way to his mouth. He looked from her to Garrus and back again. "She serious?"

"Technically, we are flying..." Garrus conceded to her, ignoring the looks he and Elaine were being given. She appreciated his honour in keeping their little bargain from the previous evening. It made her feel better about asking him questions, knowing he would not mock her in giving answers. "We just call it a ship because of tradition, our militaries are called navies. And it's also short for 'starship'."

"Oh. Now I understand. Thank you, Garrus."

Jacob looked a little thoughtful as he watched. "Didn't realise you two were on a first name basis."

"It's nothing." Elaine shrugged. "Garrus simply prevented me last night from murdering your Commander."

Kasumi choked on a drink she'd swallowed. "I hope for your sake that's not literal! What did Shepard do to you?"

"Aside from take my weapons and armour and is currently incarcerating me?"

Jacob hummed, nodding his head in approval. "Man Elaine, I gotta say, your weapons are seriously on the next level. I don't think I've ever seen anything like it. That blade could cut a hole through the hull if we're not careful."

"I got a look at it." Kasumi nodded. "That thing would fetch a decent price in some circles."

"How? I've kept the armoury locked up tight unless I'm in it!"

"Every woman keeps her mysteries, Jaaaacob." The thief practically purred out his name.

Elaine decided to explain and draw Jacob's somewhat shifting attention back to her. "Starfang was especially forged for me, made from the metal we found from fallen star. In the hands of a beginner, the sword could be deadly. But when one knows how to wield it..."

"I saw." Garrus nodded. "On Horizon, I watched you fight the Collectors. It was impressive – unlike anything I've ever seen."

A smile tugged at the corners of her lips. "I didn't realise I had an audience, Ser Garrus."

"Little else to do but watch a battle through the scope." At her curious look, he elaborated. "I'm a sniper, I specialise in shooting people from long-range."

Kasumi nodded. "And the best of the best, to hear Shepard say it."

"Ah," Elaine's blue eyes lit up when her a stray thought was confirmed. "So it was you who killed that Collector behind me."

Garrus's mandibles fluttered in what Elaine guessed was a small smirk. "Guilty as charged."

She turned eagerly back to the others, desperate to learn more. "What are you, Jacob?"

"I'm a biotic. I like to pull my enemies apart – plus I'm a hell of a weapons expert."

"You are a mage, then?"

The human male faltered. "What?"

Professor Solus finally spoke up. "Term 'Mage', abbreviated term for magician? Magic user, wizard, witchcraft? Said in a way expecting answer. Deduction believed normal. Deep seated belief – instructed multiple times from multiple sources. Not simple individual neurological regression: societal. Not possible to have this level of regression after so much advancement amongst rest of species, though."

Elaine's mouth pressed into a hard line. "If I am incorrect, then tell me what a 'by-ot-ick' actually is."

"Biotics individuals exposed to element zero, usually from within the womb. Able to express manipulation over dark energy. Results in ability to effect matter by pulling and pushing objects, creating barriers, manipulate gravity, etc."

"So if someone were to tell you that they could move objects without touching them, wouldn't that sound to you like magic?"

Garrus shrugged. "Fair point..."

"Yeah, for the dark ages." Jacob snorted.

"Come on, Jacob," the turian lightly scolded. "Let her adjust a little to everything."

"Hey, I got nothing against crazy. This whole mission is crazy on some level. So long as she's not Jack-level, I'm all good with it. Could always use another gun on our side – so to speak."

"Well then," Elaine sighed. "Let's hope your Commander will change his mind about keeping me confined to this ship. I can't kill any of the Collectors stuck here."

"Don't worry, I'm sure Shepard will come around."

"Shepard's a man of action." Garrus corrected. He swivelled in his seat so as to fully face Elaine as much as his backwards bent legs would allow. "You want him to change his mind? You've got to show him. Prove your worth and he'll put you to good use."

Jacob's voice sounded far away as ideas and thoughts began to race through Elaine's mind. "How do you know that?"

Garrus's sky-blue eyes drifted from Elaine's briefly. "It's how Shepard taught me to be. It's how I operated with my own team."

"You know what, Garrus?" a cunning look spread across the blonde's face, a toothy grin that even a dragon might've known meant trouble was coming. "I just think you might be right..."

-----------------------------------

A/N: Nice long chapter for you guys! I hope you like it.

I've recently gotten into the start of a new series "Outlander", about a woman lost in time - sound familiar? So I'm taking a little inspiration from that currently as well.

Also, please don't think I hate Miranda! I don't! And this story won't be all Miranda-bashing or anyone-bashing. I just know that not everyone is going to like Elaine, they're going to have their suspicions of her, and I think its a good way to mix up the dynamics. I promise, for every character I'm making look like an asshole right now, I promise they will get their redeeming moments. This is just how they're being presented to Elaine and how she believes they're behaving. We will get more insight into this as their character arcs progress through the story, I promise.

*this is a reference to one Garrus/femshep fanfiction that I absolutely adore - it was the first Mass Effect fanfiction I ever read. It's called "Where Angles Fear to Tread". Please read it, it's awesome and sweet.

Please review! I live for all feedback!