Mabel/Gideon-Bot: "ATTAAAAAAAACK!!!" *The Gideon-Bot charges at Bill, shooting a few missiles from its hair.*

Gideon: "Hey, watch it!"

*Somehow, none of the missiles hit Gideon or Waddles. Bill teleports to dodge the missiles, reappearing nearby.*

Bill: "Oh, trying to distract me, are you? WELL, IT WORKED! So please stop!"

Mabel/Gideon-Bot: "Never!" *More missiles are launched.*

Gideon: "Hey, that one almost singed my hair!"

*Bill teleports again, this time reappearing in his angry red form.*

Bill: "OH, YOU KIDS WANNA PLAY WITH FIRE?" *Bill launches two giant fireballs from his hands, and both of them slam into the Gideon-Bot. The robot, Mabel, Gideon and Waddles are all thrown backwards. The robot lands on its robotic rear end.*

Mabel/Gideon-Bot: "Woah! I think we're okay!" *The Gideon-Bot's hair disintegrates, leaving Mabel exposed and Waddles and Gideon falling.*

Mabel: "Definitely not okay!" *Even while breaking down, the Gideon-Bot manages to catch Gideon and Waddles. Mabel then jumps out of the control room, and the robot breaks completely.*

Bill: "OH BOY, THIS IS FUN! HEY, ¥°¥! I JUST CRUSHED THE ROBOT. DO YOU WANNA CRUSH THE REAL THING?"

¥°¥: "..."

Gideon: "Oh, my baby bought a new car! Let's lick and run, wheeeeee!" *Gideon's eyes are completely white as ¥°¥ drives him to insanity.*

Bill (Small and yellow again): "Oh, you wanna drive him insane, too? Personally, I enjoy some variety when I obliterate people's souls, but whatever. Who's next? Shooting Star?"

Mabel: "Let go of my brother, you ugly yellow freak!" *Mabel runs toward Dipper, who's still blabbering nonsense.*

Dipper: "Meow, meow. Who's my retro llama? Everyone needs a spork every now and then!"

*Mabel grabs her brother's arm, and he instantly snaps out of it.*

Dipper: "Mabel? Wait, what? Oh no, I'm remembering... where's Bill?"

Bill: "Behind you, Pine Tree." *Bill hovers behind Dipper.* "You're really annoying, you know that? Who would have thought that
¥°¥ loses his grip on you if someone touches you? Oh well. It's a minor setback. How about I just... wait, is that the janitor guy?"

*Dipper and Mabel turn to see Soos stepping out of the portal. Dramatic music plays as Soos poses dramatically. Then the portal shakes and he falls flat on his face.*

Soos: "It was so much cooler when your Uncle Ford did it." *Dipper and Mabel run to Soos.*

Dipper: "Soos! What are you doing here? You're going to get killed!"

Mabel: "Yeah, sorry to break it to you, but there's a demon on the rampage."

Soos: "Dudes, I'm here for you, demon or no demon."

Bill: "Aw, how touching. Now, can we just cut to the part where-" *Bill is interrupted by a sudden noise. A moment later, a projectile from Ford's blaster hits him.*

Bill: "How many times do I have to KILL you people?"

*Ford and Stan are free from their prison, and ready for battle. Mabel runs over to break ¥°¥'s grip on Gideon.*

Bill: "There wasn't even anyone to free you! How did you escape?"

Stan: "All you need to know, ugly, is that the pig has his ways." *Waddles is at Stan's feet and turns his head adorably. He then squeals.*

Bill: "I will NOT be FOILED by a PIG!!!" *Bill turns huge again, and ¥°¥, though non-existent, also prepares for battle. The Pines gather together, along with Gideon, Soos and Waddles, near the flaming ruins of the Gideon-Bot.*

Bill: "Oh, isn't this just a perfect last stand?"

Ford: "Yes, a last stand... for you!"

Bill: "Oh, nice comeback, IQ. Now, how about you think of another one while I prepare the STRONGEST ATTACK I CAN MANAGE! And this time, NO DISTRACTIONS!" *A giant transparent cage falls over the team as Bill begins to glow with energy.*

Mabel: "Uncle Ford, how do we get out?"

Ford: "I'm afraid I don't know! This is a multi-layered, self-defending magical barrier trap. There's no way out!"

???: "But there is!"

*A shadowy figure zooms out of nowhere and lands on a ledge near Bill.*

Bill (still gathering power): "WHAT... HOW... WHO?"

gamerboss32: "Prepare to be destroyed, Bill!"

Bill: "YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING! YOU CAN'T TAKE ME DOWN!"

Gamerboss: "But I can!"

Everyone: "How?"

Gamerboss: "Because..." *He pulls a book out of his vest.* "I've read Journal 1." *Everyone gasps.*

Ford: "But I haven't written anything about this in there!"

Gamerboss: "Not yet, you haven't, but later you'll time travel back to before this and write in in there."

Bill: "OKAY, SMART GUY. IF YOU'RE SO CONFIDENT, THEN ATTACK ALREADY!"

Gamerboss (Pulls out a giant, awesome-looking blaster): "Oh, I will."

*Bill finally launches his attack. A tidal wave of destructive energy flies at Gamerboss. Our gaming hero fires his blaster and uses another device to fly upwards, avoiding Bill's attack. Bill throws three more waves, and Gamerboss lands and avoids them, still firing his blaster. The shots all miss Bill, who throws another tidal wave. Gamerboss glances at his gravity-switch device: it needs to recharge. There's no escape. The wall of energy soars at Gamer, who accepts his fate. And slowly, everything disappears.*

*And then comes back immediately, but in a very different scene. There's a large chess board, two feet by two feet, on a table. Everything else is white and shapeless. Gamer, Bill, the Pines, Soos, Gideon and Waddles are all there.*

HonestMongoose: "Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, humans and demons and pigs alike, to the Fate Room."

Gamerboss: "Oh, thanks for the teleport, Mongoose!"

HonestMongoose: "No problem. I'd choose you over a evil dream demon any day."

Mabel: "Aww... they're such good friends."

HonestMongoose: "And now it's just weird. Anyway, the reason you're here is because of a dare. Ihascake12345 dares:

I dare everyone to play a game of chess to settle this!"

Bill: "Oh, in that case, I have infinite knowledge and have metaphorically already won. Can I kill them now? And then you?"

HonestMongoose: "No. You have to actually win. It will be Bill and ¥°¥ versus everyone else. Bill will move first."

*The Pines and other good guys gather on one side of the table, and Bill hovers at the other end. Bill moves a pawn forward psychically. The heroes gather to discuss strategies, and then Ford moves one of their pawns. The game goes on for a while, with the villain and heroes evenly matched. Both sides capture a few pawns, and a knight or two, and maybe a bishop. But both sides' King and Queen are safe.*

Bill: "Oh you took my last Bishop... how about I move my Queen here?" *Bill's Queen moves.*

Ford: "Oh no! I fell for the old simpleton's back-twisted reverse chain mechanism replay!"

Soos: "Uh... nobody else got that either, right?"

Ford: "It means that, no matter how we choose to move, his Queen has a clear shot on our King. If our King dies-"

Soos (Gasping in realization): "Then the Queen has to rule the chess kingdom!"

Ford: "No. If the King dies, then we lose. Game over."

Bill: "Ha! There was literally no way for you to win, IQ."

Ford: "I'm sorry, friends. I should have seen that move coming."

Dipper: "It's okay, Uncle Ford. We tried our best, and whatever comes next, we'll face it together." *Dipper reaches his hand out."

Mabel: "Together." *Mabel reaches her hand out next to Dipper's. Everyone else follows, putting their hands in the middle and saying, "together".*

Ford: "Together."

Stan: "Together." *Stan offers his brother a smile, and Ford returns it.*

Soos: "Oh, my grandma is going to be mad if I die- I mean, together."

Gideon: "Together."

Waddles: "Together." *Everyone looks shocked except Mabel, who offers the pig a solemn nod.*

HonestMongoose: "Alright, Bill. Go ahead." *Bill reaches for his Queen, looking overjoyed in a creepy way. And then he pauses.*

Bill: "Hey, I feel magical resistance from somewhere. There's a unicorn nearby..."

Mabel: "Yes! My unicorn DNA has finally broken through!"

Bill (Scared): "No, there's a unicorn here! I can feel it!" *Bill reaches to make the killing move with his Queen, but a rainbow appears between his hand and the Queen.*

Celestabellebethabelle: "Unicorns, attack!"

Mabel: "Oh, you want another beating?"

Celestabellebethabelle: "Not YOU, human. We must rid the world of that demon!"

Bill (Completely panicking) "No! No, I swear, I'll leave the world by myself! I don't need escorts! See, I'll hop dimensions! I can reality jump, too! Yeah, let's do that! Okay, bye!" *Bill vanishes.*

Celestabellebethabelle: "Oh, no you don't! After him, my friends!" *The other unicorns leap into the air, vanishing.*

Dipper: "Yes! It's working! What do those guys have against Bill, I wonder?"

Celestabellebethabelle: "He is un-pure of heart!" *Celestabellebethabelle vanishes with the others. The remaining people are left alone in the Fate Room.*

Dipper: "Wait, so that's... that's it? We win?"

Mabel: "Maybe unicorns aren't so bad after all."

HonestMongoose: "You are both correct. Yes, you've beaten Bill, and I happen to know a very nice and intelligent unicorn."

Gamerboss: "Wait, so what happens now?"

HonestMongoose: "Sadly, my party of torturous dares and ridiculous fun must come to an end." *Gamerboss slowly fades away.*

Stan: "Aw, man. I was just starting to like that kid. I wanted to find out where he got those guns. And probably steal some."

Ford: "Brighten up, Stanley! We've beaten Bill and that crazy mongoose thing! The dare magic is weakening, isn't it, Mr. Mongoose?"

HonestMongoose: "Yes, it's true. I'm losing my grip on you guys. Well, you were a lot of fun." *The characters begin to glow and fade.*

HonestMongoose: "Let's relive some of our best moments while we still can."

***

( Moonlight shines over the quiet scene. Candlelight glows, illuminating a couple- Wait, never mind. It's just Dipper and Pacifica. Dipper is blocking Pacifica's escape, growling and drooling. )

Dipper: "Do you want a lamby, lamby, BABY??? Skip around the BABY!!! Skip around the BABY!!! Go greet your BABY!!!"

***

Grunkle Stan: "Ah-ha! The ancient Candy-Rainbow Prophecy says that to make a happy reign across all the world, we must first find the Crown Of Happiness! To get that, we must fight- wait, no, make friends with the Super-Happy-Yet-Mildly-Terrifying Guardian! This is gonna be sooooooooo much fun!" ( skips to a door ) "The crown should be through this door." ( opens it and gasps ) "Who the Fairy-Friendly Flowers are you?"

Aoshima: ( makes dolphin noises )

***

Dipper: ( The laws of stretchability go to war with the laws of magic. In the end, the struggle rips Dipper out of existence.)

***

Dipper: ( makes unholy noises )

***

Dipper: "Has anyone ever told you what lovely... uh... ears you have?"

Pacifica: "Um, no..."

Dipper: "Okay. They're, um, round. And... round. Very round."

***

Ducktective: Quack... quack!"

Detective: "Quite right, old chap! The seer can tell us where this man really was last night!"

Barber: "You got all that from two quacks?"

Detective: "Of course not. I read the subtitles at the bottom of the screen."

***

Rumble: "Maybe your face killed my father. Because it is ugly! Hahahahaha!"

***

HonestMongoose (now alone in the Fate Room): "Oh, it's been fun. We had a lot of laughs, a lot of good battles... I feel good about this. Except, I don't think anyone decoded the messages at the end of The Fall of Gravity Parts 1 and 2. Oh well. Maybe it's best that some secrets, some theories, and some stories, are never truly understood..."

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