Gideon Northwest was done with people.

This was a common occurrence, but today was worse than usual. First, he had to go into town, which always resulted in annoying attention from idiot locals; then, he got dragged into a dumb hunt by his so-called friends, even though that wimp Greyson was once again protected by his little Asian hyena of a bodyguard; and, to top it all off, that ridiculous Dipper Pines showed up and tried to speak to him, just because Gideon saved his life the other day.

Everyone was such a pain.

Gideon huffed as he stomped through the forest, creating deep holes in the deeper snow. He knew that Pacifica liked to use her amulet to glide over the snow when she needed to get away in the forest, but he liked the feeling of force as he sank through the snow with each step. He liked creating a path for himself, too. It made him feel like he owned the forest. Perhaps he actually did; he lost track of how much property his family owned around this little town.

Either way, the forest was his.

Gideon stopped to rest, standing ankle-deep in the snow in the middle of a small clearing. The weak sun shone through the evergreen branches. No people here. Just him, his amulet, and his thoughts.

A screech cut through the air.

Gideon groaned. Of course. Perfect timing!

As the screech continued, taking on the timbre of a dying wildcat (even worse than the noises that Candy had made earlier), Gideon could tell it was Pacifica. The only other time he had heard her make that sound was when they were kids and he'd levitated gum into her hair with his amulet. Good times.

Gideon considered waiting until Pacifica stopped screaming at the top of her lungs, but that probably wouldn't happen anytime soon. With a sigh, he activated his amulet, floating above the snow in a blue haze. He would need the convenience for this.

He followed the sound of the screeching — it wasn't exactly hard — until he could see Pacifica's purple glow through the trees. She was on the edge of the forest, that idiot! What if someone saw her? For a girl so good at hiding insanity behind make-up and a smile, Pacifica had a shockingly small sense of discretion. Now that her powers were back in business, Gideon thought that she used them way too much.

He cleared the last line of trees. Now he could fully see Pacifica. She floated in the middle of her astral projection, directing her inhuman shriek at. . .

Mabel Pines?

"Get away from me!" yelled Pacifica, her projection taking a step backwards.

Mabel didn't appear to even be doing anything, except yelling back. "Not until you promise never to touch me or my brother again!"

Gideon decided to hang back a bit and watch. This was interesting.

"Gideon! Thank goodness you're here!"

Oh, right. He was glowing.

He sighed and floated into sight. Mabel looked over at him. "You! Gideon, right? Can you get her down from there so I can pound her?"

Gideon blinked. He had only interacted with Mabel once (plus heard a bit about her from her brother), and he wouldn't have expected her to act so violent. After all, she'd run from Pacifica as soon as she had the chance the other day.

"Gideon, get that freak away from me!" Pacifica whined. Gideon had no idea what she was so worried about. She was floating a yard or so above Mabel's head in a giant astral projection, for Cipher's sake. Gideon had to admit, she made a good astral projection; he usually just settled for a blue haze around him when he needed to hover.

"Okay," he said, addressing both Mabel and Pacifica, "what exactly is going on here?"

"She just showed up and—"

"Pacifica has to pay for—"

Gideon was about to yell at them to go one at a time when a figure bolted from the trees and ran into Mabel with full force. He peered into the snow cloud that had flown up around them, waiting for it to clear. When it did, he saw two Mabels on the ground.

"Finally grow a backbone?" said one Mabel to the other. "I thought you were scared."

"I'm scared of her, not you! And I'm not going to let you put us in danger by provoking her!"

Pacifica shot Gideon a bewildered look. He didn't return it: Instead, he stared in vague horror at the Mabels. Something about this. . . This was familiar.

"Don't you want her to face justice?" the first Mabel demanded, getting to her feet. The other Mabel jumped up as well, and Gideon realized there was only one difference in their appearance: One had a dark blue lightning bolt on her shirt, the other a cloud of the same color.

"I want to stay alive!" Cloud Mabel retorted.

"Um, are you guys talking about me?" Pacifica asked. Her astral projection got a bit smaller.

"Shut up," Lightning Bolt Mabel snapped.

Cloud Mabel flinched.

All right, that was enough. "Why are there two of you?" Gideon said, floating over to and landing near the Mabels. He didn't yell, but his voice carried over the scene.

"Wouldn't you like to know," Lightning Bolt Mabel said, folding her arms.

Cloud Mabel punched LB Mabel on the shoulder and approached Gideon. He warily stepped back a bit. "You're the one who saved us, aren't you?" she asked. "Saved me and Dipper?"

"I saved Dipper, maybe, but I don't know about you," Gideon replied. "You aren't the real Mabel, are you? Neither of you are."

Cloud Mabel's eyes filled with tears. "You saved us," she said, and she reached out for him.

Augh! What was she doing? Gideon dodged to the left, and Cloud Mabel's hands grabbed at empty air. Pacifica laughed from above. "She was trying to give you a hug, you idiot!"

Gideon straightened his shirt. "I knew that," he said imperiously.

He had not known that.

"He still can't be trusted!" Lightning Bolt Mabel said to Cloud Mabel. "He didn't do anything; we were about to smash the amulet, but he stopped us. He saved her, not us."

Cloud Mabel hesitated.

"Yeah, okay, but who are you?" Gideon asked again — though if the feeling of dread in his stomach was any indication, he knew the answer to his question. But he couldn't quite remember.

"We're Mabel," the girls said at the same time. Gideon pursed his lips, watching them carefully. The memory was almost in his awareness, but it lingered just off to the side.

Wait. There it was. An image flashed across his vision: one from years ago. A glowing crystal. . . his own self staring at him, but with a differently colored amulet. . . "You're clones," he realized aloud.

"Well, that much is obvious," Pacifica said.

Gideon held up a hand to quiet her. "One of you has to overpower the other in order to decide what the real Mabel feels," he continued.

"How do you know?" Cloud Mabel asked. LB Mabel shot her an incredulous look, as if shocked that Cloud Mabel would confirm Gideon's words.

Gideon ignored them both. "Paz, stay here. I'm going to go get Mabel. The real one." He looked back and forth from Pacifica and her projection and the two Mabel clones. "Um, just sit up in a tree or something so this one doesn't murder you." He jabbed a thumb at LB Mabel.

"No way!" Pacifica retorted. "If they're clones, can't I hurt them? It'll feel good."

Cloud Mabel clung to LB Mabel's shirt, but the latter pushed her off.

Gideon rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Try not to attract attention. All of you." He floated up into the air again and flew away. Immature, all of them, but he couldn't be spared to babysit.

Time to go get Mabel. Now she would owe him twice. She'd better not think that this meant she could associate with him, like her brother thought. Just because he saved someone didn't mean they were friends or anything.

Gideon Northwest didn't have friends.