I really didn't fully understand my state of emotions. I felt bothered. Literally. All. The. Time. Ever since Dimitri came back with Lady Natasha--I didn't notice any difference--I felt annoyed to a great extend. I just felt so angry all the time. You'd think after that talk with Christian, I would be more at peace. But no. I felt worse.

There I was--taking deep breaths--sitting on Dimitri's bed with gritted teeth. Seeing the two together made my poor eyes hurt. I needed to figure myself out. I felt so tangled around him. Why? Guarding him shouldn't be that hard. But hell, it was that hard.

I scowled and the book on his bed lit up. I gasped and took a deep breath. The fire went away and the book was fine. Thank goodness. I opened my hand and a silver cupcake appeared. I started munching away. It tasted good and made me happy. The sweetness distracted me completely. 

I looked beside me and smiled. 

Those cupcakes don't know what's coming at them. . .

"What in the world!" Dimitri exclaimed, standing in the doorway.

I swallowed and smiled brightly at him. "Want one?" I offered, ignoring how his eyes scanned his room. Of course, the paper wraps were a little distracting. 

He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came up. Ha! I shrugged and took a big bite out of the cupcake. He let out a breath slowly and said, "Clean this up, Rose. Now."

I smirked at him and more cupcakes appeared on the floor, and literally everywhere in his room. I faked a gasp and said, "Oops."

He threw me a look of heated disapproval and closed the door. I knew he wanted to slam the door, but the presence of his family downstairs stopped him from doing so. He crossed his arms and asked, "Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"This."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"I'm talking about you filling my darn room with silver cupcakes that smell like a chocolate factory!"

I brushed the crumbs off my lap and gave him an innocent look. 

"And why not? I'm your Guardian Angel and I can do whatever I want to do, too."

His hands shot forward, grabbing my arms. I was pulled up to my feet and his brown eyes stared into mine. My heartbeat accelerated a little too fast for my liking. It was not fair. My head felt light and like it was spinning. Odd. But whatever...I felt like I was the only one trying to make this 'guardian-angel-and-human' relationship work. I wanted the best for him, and she was not the best, not for him, anyway. Seeing him near her just made me so edgy.

"Why?" he asked one more time, his hold on me seemed heavier. I knew it was just my feelings playing tricks on me. I could escape easily. However, I didn't. The way he was looking at me made my body freeze.

I swallowed and said, "Because I'm angry." Somehow admitting this to him was a lot harder than I thought. I felt so messed up that tears started to run down my face. "I want to go home. I want to go back." And I was not talking about earthly homes. I was talking about Heaven, up there. I learned my lesson. I got my pain. I wanted to go back now. Being here frustrated me more than anything, like ever, especially with Dimitri. Why, oh, why him?

"You said three years."

"I don't want to be here anymore!"

"You can't leave."

"I don't care! I'll find a way!"

"There is no other way."

"And what makes you think that? Huh? All I've been trying to tell you is she's not the one! You never listen! You never do!" I nearly yelled at him. 

His hold on me tightened and I stepped back a little.

"Then why did I take you to all of those places? Do you ever wonder why? Do you even think about the things I have done for you? You can't expect me to switch sides like a light switch, Rose. " He looked so hurt that it hurt me. I felt him. Words dissolved in my mouth and all I felt was pain, especially my heart. "Why can't you see?" 

His questions left me scattered. I had a hard time believing the meaning of his words. Did that mean what I think he meant?  I was afraid. His hands slowly slipped from my arms and he walked out, shaking his head as he went. I stepped forward, my hands reaching out to him, but I never reached him.

What have I done?

This was all wrong. I was not the one for him. His guardian angel? Yes. But not like that. . .I didn't know anymore. His words had me dumbfounded. I swallowed the big lump in my throat and went after him. He was walking outside alone. 

"Dimitri!"

He turned around, slightly unhappy to see me at such a moment. 

"Rose, " he acknowledged me and continued to walk.

I caught up beside him and opened my mouth to say something, anything. 

"I hope you understand why you can't just leave," he spoke up, not looking at me. His words chilled me to the core. "I am not a child, Rose. I am not confused with my feelings. I know where I'm standing. Do you?" I felt his warm gaze on me. I looked down, suddenly feeling ashamed of myself.

I didn't know where I was standing, not anymore.

"Dimitri, I-I'm not that person you're supposed to be with," I said softly. Somehow my own little declaration made my chest hurt.

"How do you know that?" he asked, still walking.

I shrugged and said, "I don't. It just doesn't happen, Dimitri. It's unheard of."

"I never knew you were the one to follow traditions and rules."

"I'm, well, I do know my limits." I really did. 

He smiled a little and said, "How comforting that must be for the Almighty."

"You have no idea," the heated tension lessened and I found myself enjoying the silent walk with him. I couldn't help it but imagine what it would be like if I was human again, during Dimitri's time. 

After a few minutes of peaceful silence, Dimitri decided to break it.

"I think we need to work on communicating," he said, climbing over a short wooden fence. He then offered his hand to me. Unfamiliar with this kind of gesture, I shook my head and said, "It's fin-"

"Just take my hand," he cut in, inching his hand closer to me. Defeated, I sighed and placed my hand in his. I know I didn't have to do it the human way, but I did anyway. With his help, I climbed over the fence. You know, these were the moments that made me wish I was human again. Funny, being around him made me feel like human again. The tingling I felt in my hand made me pull my hand out of his. That was strange. I dismissed it and the confused glance Dimitri threw me when I did that. 

"You do realize that we're on top of a hill right?" he asked, looking down at me with a smile.

That was when I really noticed my surroundings. He was right. We were standing right on top of a small hill. I turned around and felt the wind blowing gently. I felt him right behind me. He leaned in close and whispered, "I don't want you to be like the wind. I don't want you to blow away after three years is over. I want you to stay."

A short chapter! Please let me know what you think!

Thank you for reading GUARDIAN ANGEL and giving it an opportunity to shine.

Love,

Iris