" So they call me an addict I see , but how did i become an addict how did I sell my soul to such a dreadful poison , afterall not every addict is a addict from the very beginning according . You see my story begins from my early childhood , u see i didn't have one of those golden parents who are always there for their kid no matter what . I had parents who fought all day long , to be honest my very first memory was seeing my parents fight . But I found it normal , normal sounds a bit bizarre considering my father was an addict who used to mistreat my mother but I guess it helped me write some really good poems  . Poems were my language to myself . 

I remember it was my 12th birthday and my mom had baked a cake , she called my dad to come for the cutting of the cake but he instead picked up his empty bottle of beer and slammed it into the back of my mother's head , this ended up being the last time I would ever see my mom and dad in the same room , it also ended up being the last time I seen any of them .

My aunt and uncle in New York took me in and raised me as their own. It was perfect , my aunt and uncle ended up being closer to me than my parents were to me considering all they did was argue . It all felt good , but even good times expire and it did for this instance . My uncle who was like a father to me passed away due to medical reasons , I would say this was the real nail in the coffin for me cause I ended up being really attached to him .

He was more than just a father figure to me; he was my true source of fatherly love . When you suffer the loss of a parent or someone deeply cherished, grief envelops your mind, and the weight of depression descends upon you. The silence becomes deafening, echoing your darkest fears, dominating your thoughts. In that moment, all that remained was the overwhelming presence of depression, firmly grasping the reins of my life, casting its shadow of mourning, depression, and anxiety over everything I knew. I tried it all , sports , girls even studies but my mind stayed locked . Until that day when i passed by a convenience store where I seen this young man smoking a cigarette , he noticed me staring and offered me a cigarette . The moment I took that first puff , I felt my mind open I could finally think again . For that split second I felt at peace , it felt like it was all ok , the second puff however did nothing , neither did the third or fourth or any cigarette that came after . In the search of digging myself out of depression , I dug myself a hole for addiction . I've been chained to addiction ever since , the drugs ,the alcohol and the cigarettes all controlling me . The act gives me no joy anymore but i am bound to it .

I wouldn't ever blame my parents though . There's a phrase i remember from somewhere it says ' Your past , your present , your future is already set . Destiny has played the cards , your just in it for the experience be it good or bad ' .

But i've made a friend now , Alexander Williams , he's smart enough to not fall into the trap of addiction however , I hoped he would be the one to pull me out of this pit of addiction . But i fear his idea will further intensify my addiction

My story is not done yet but it will be soon but for now just watch it unfold. Whatever happens to me is already decided i just didn't know what was the end , none of us do after-all "

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