Chapter 21
Coco

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Two. Her heart hanged for two skipping beats. It stayed in the air with every bit of her uncertainties and reservations until it resumed its rhythm on a much more profound thumping. She swallowed, heaving her eyes to refocus on the world around her.

It was scenic. Like a frame straight out of a movie screen. The people were painted in a colorful elongated blob. They were moving in a pace that's neither slow nor fast, just enough to keep everything going, and Coco couldn't hear the tiny chatters above the thumping in her chest. Every sound and every bit was a blur. All she could care about were his messages and Harper's remark.

She sighs. What does Axel mean by his messages? Why was he asking her to go home kasi miss niya na raw siya? And what does Harper mean by they were all over each other?

Has she been so obvious all this time?

Coco couldn't help the wrinkling on her forehead. In her best efforts to remain indifferent, why was she thinking about him again? How can he keep doing this to her? Plaguing her mind like a phantom lurking in the dark. Lingering for far too long. Far too cruel.

He was so unfair.

Coco tried to shake him off her mind. There's no sense on dwelling something from the past and certainly, something that involves Axel Young. It goes against everything she's trying to muster.

"You okay?" Harper asked when they got in the car.

"Huh?" Her brows cocked. "I'm fine."

"Sure?" Harper smiles as his car hums low. "Natahimik ka kasi bigla."

"Ah . . ." She nods. "I'm sure."

A bit of silence enveloped his SUV as they make it out from the parking lot. Coco breathes deep, trying to shrug away the residues of the trance when her phone buzzed again.

Ax
San kayo pagtapos kumain?
Maaga ka ba uuwi?
Susunduin kita?

Her fingers curled tightly around her phone as a roll of new text messages goes in again.

Ax
Gagabihin ka ba?
Wag ka papahatid sa kanya ha?
Gusto kitang sunduin

"Si Ax?" Harper asked.

Napalingon naman si Coco sa gawi niya. "Uh . . ." She swallows. "Yup. Pa'no mo nalaman?"

Harper brings his eyes back on the road. "You have that look."

"Look?"

He nods. "Oo. Kapag kay Ax palagi kang may look."

"What look?" Confusion was written all over her face. Do I give off a look?

"Nakakunot noo mo but your eyes say otherwise." Harper turned on his blinkers before making a right turn.

Her nose scrunched. "What do you mean?"

"Ah," he grins. "Parang kumikinang mata mo palagi."

"Huh?" Kumikinang?

Harper gave her a quick glance. "Napansin ko 'yon lalo na dati. Kapag nasa class, 'di ba parati kayong magkatabi ni Ax sa upuan? Minsan mauuna siyang dumating tapos palaging may naka-save na upuan para sa 'yo kasi puno tayo sa klase.

"Oh . . ." She nodded, remembering their college routines.

"Tapos minsan siya may dala ng laptop bag mo. Tanda ko 'yon kasi bright pink kulay ng lagayan ng laptop mo na may bulaklak na print sa harap. Siya rin taga refill palagi ng tubig sa tumbler mo 'di ba?"

"What?" She tilted her head at the reminder, trying to recall those times. "He refills my water kasi minsan nakikiinom siya. Ang lazy niya kasi magdala ng tumbler niya even though he has a lot at home."

"May isang beses din no'n na nakasalubong ko kayo sa hallway tapos nakaakbay siya sa 'yo. Akala ko nga no'n kayo na. Kaya inisip ko talaga na siya 'yong tinutukoy mo sa 'kin dati na gusto mo."

"I see." The memories came crashing back. That was so long ago, at the height of her . . . no. Coco shakes her head. I shouldn't look back. There's no looking back.

"Pero tama ba? Siya 'yong gusto mo?" he asks.

Coco draws her eyes to the window. She huffs and her shoulders slump. Here she goes again. "You already said I have a look. I don't think I can deny pa."

"Hala? Talaga?"

She sucks in some air, nodding. "For the longest time, yes."

"Until now?"

"No." Coco shook her head. "Not until now. Ang dumb ko naman if hanggang ngayon. No'ng sixteen ako until twenty-two."

Harper counted on his fingers. "So six years?"

She frowned. "Really?" Coco never counted the years. May ilang gap din naman kasi in between especially when he has a girlfriend. She found it so distasteful liking people who are already committed. The feelings don't fade overtime, it's just automatically gone within a snap. It doesn't even matter how invested she was, that's just it.

But the thing is, Coco doesn't have any idea when her feelings decide to resume. Whenever she thinks it's over, her heart suddenly picks up to prove her wrong. Which was rude, really. Parang may sariling isip, hindi man lang siya binibigyan ng warning.

"I don't know. Never akong nag-count," she says, crossing her arms over her chest. What's the point in counting when it wasn't consistent? What's the point when all he did was break her heart?

He doesn't deserve it. She swallows. He doesn't deserve me.

"Ah." Tumango si Harper. "Okay lang 'yan baka 'di mo lang napansin na matagal na pala."

"Maybe."

Coco was surprised when they pulled up at the parking lot. The drive to the museum didn't take an hour.

"Malapit lang pala."

"Oo." He smiles. Coco wandered her eyes around the establishment when Harper placed a cardigan around her shoulders as they make it past the entrance.

"Baka lang lamigin ka."

"Oh, thank you." Her phone buzzes again inside her bag and Harper must have felt it too.

"Si Ax ulit?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. Ang kulit-kulit niya."

"Bakit pala hindi mo na siya gusto ngayon?" he asks as they set foot inside the atom gallery.

Coco roamed her eyes around the purple illuminated room. There were webbings on the ceiling and a diagram on the walls, mainly all the things she can see and expect inside an atom.

They walked further. "What's that?" she asks, pointing at the red, white, and black circles bonded together on a wall.

"Atoms pa rin na naka-bond," Harper explains.

"Ano 'yong black line in between?"

"Electrons."

"Oh . . ." she nodded, trying to read the information beside when Harper cleared his throat.

"Hindi mo sinagot question ko."

Her lashes flutter. "Hmm?"

"Sabi ko kanina bakit hindi na hanggang ngayon?"

"Ah . . ." Truth be told, she doesn't quite know how to answer it. Coco knew her reasons but at the back of her mind sits a question she doesn't want to entertain.

Was she entirely sure it's over or not?

Of course, she argues. Of course I'm sure.

"Wala na ba talaga? After six years?" Harper adds.

She glared at him. "Yes. Wala na. You have to believe me."

It made him crack up. "Sorry ang cute mo. Bigla kang umirap."

"Don't laugh! It's true kasi. I'm really over it kahit let's say na ten years pa 'yon." They walked further and skimmed through some of the exhibits. Most of the people at the gallery were also enjoying their time interacting with the equipments around the area.

"Pero bakit? What made you decide it's time to move forward?"

Oh. "I just want to." Coco shrugs, pressing her lips in a tight line. Why can't she escape him even just for a minute? They were already at an interactive science museum. She has been wanting to visit this place for the longest time. So why can't she focus on the exhibit?

Kasalanan 'to ni Ax.

"Talaga ba? Gano'n lang kadali?"

She scoffs. "Why are we talking about him?"

"Wala naman curious lang." Harper pulls her to his side when a kid nearly bumped her leg.

Coco heaves her eyes. Ni hindi niya rin napansin 'yong bata. But surprisingly, Harper was attentive enough.

"Alam mo akala ko talaga kayo." His hand also falls the second they were clear from bumping against anyone at the exhibit. "Tapos naisip ko ang tagal n'yo na rin especially no'ng nasa parking lot tayo last time."

Her brow shots up. "Really?"

"Oo." Harper grins. "Naalala ko kasi parang bumakod din siya sa 'yo agad no'ng nakita ako."

"Oh . . ." She nodded, barely recalling that time. "But that's just Ax for you. It doesn't really mean anything."

"Sure ka ba?"

Her forehead creased. "What do you mean?"

"Kasi parang ang over the top naman na mambabakod siya lalo na kung . . ." Harper leaned in so he could whisper in her ear. " . . . alam naman ng lahat na kayo. Walang reason para gawin niya 'yon."

He pulled away. "The mere fact that everyone knows has already set the boundaries in stone. Kaya what for, 'di ba?" A corner of his lips curled up. "Unless my presence is threatening."

Coco rolled her eyes. "Ang child play naman."

"Well mas kilala mo siya sa 'kin. Sinasabi ko lang 'yong impression ng actions niya from an outside perspective."

Her eyes narrowed. She doesn't like where the conversation was going but the idea he planted in her brain was also watered by the second. May roots na agad. Hindi niya man lang napalabas sa kabilang tainga 'yong sinabi ni Harper. It immediately made itself at home inside her mind.

Parang si Ax lang sa bahay nila. Trespassing!

"The way you react also gives me the impression na you're not completely over it."

"Harper, naman . . ." She clicks her tongue. Tinawanan lang din siya ni Harper habang naglalakad sila sa loob ng gallery.

Coco's eyes widened when she saw the aluminum ball that's always the center of attention for every science fair in her previous alma mater. She had never tried touching it in fear of getting electrocuted. "I want to try that." She pointed at the ball.

"Sure pero alisin mo muna siguro 'yang watch at bracelet mo." Harper helped her with her bag so she could remove her watch and accessories.

They waited for the three girls who were having fun recording their experience with the static ball when one of them took a glance at Coco and Harper standing a few feet from them.

"Omg!" The girl in a white cropped shirt beamed when she noticed them. "Coco Illaraza?"

She smiled, raising a hand to give them a little wave. "Hi!"

"Hala! Omg, ikaw nga!" The other girls also waved at her, leaving the static ball.

Harper quietly stepped aside when the three girls approached her to ask for a picture and an autograph.

"Thank you! Ang ganda-ganda mo! Para kang manika."

Her cheeks heat up. "That's so sweet of you, thank you rin. Nice meeting you!"

"Ay! May ibibigay po pala ako. Para sa inyo ni Ax. Sakto pala nadala ko!" Ella, the girl wearing a lavender top, fished inside her bag.

"Ito!"

Coco's eyes marbled when Ella held out a fan with Ax's huge grinning face printed on the front. "Sakto kasi mainit kanina tapos hindi ako nagpalit ng bag kaya nadala ko 'tong fan na 'to."

"Oh . . ." She nods, voice trailing.

"Ito naman for you," Ella handed her an acrylic keychain charm with her name encapsulated inside a star and everything was printed in pink. Even the star holder was pink.

"Ang cute naman nito. Thank you!" she says admiring the keychain. Coco was aware some fans were creating merch based on their pairing but she never really had one. Official merch lang 'yong may'ron siya.

"Welcome! Enjoy po kayo! See you ulit sa next mall show!" The three girls walked away to the next exhibit.

Harper chortled when he saw the hand fan. "Ayan, sign. Nagpaparamdam siya."

She rolled her eyes again. "That's because you won't stop talking about him."

"Curious lang naman. It's your fault."

Coco tried to touch the static ball with her fingertip just to get a feel of it. "Sure ba? Hindi ako makukuryente dito?"

He shakes his head. "No, safe ka d'yan. Basta wala ka namang suot na metal, you're fine."

"Okay . . ." she says, pressing her palms against the ball. Coco felt a bit of tingling as the static electricity crawls up on her skin.

"Ayan, nakatayo na buhok mo," Harper comments. "D'yan ka lang, kuhaan kita ng picture." He takes out his phone to get a quick snap of Coco having fun at the static ball.

A tiny giggle burst out of her lips when she saw her reflection at the mirror across the static ball. "I look so cute! Mukha akong rockstar."

"Oo nga! P'wede na, change career," he says.

Coco lets go of the ball and Harper made her shake her hands so static would wear off. "'Wag mo muna ibalik 'tong watch mo. Baka bigla kang ma-ground."

"Oh, pa-shoot na lang sa loob ng bag ko please."

They stayed for a while inside the museum. Coco really enjoyed each of the gallery when her stomach rumbled.

"I'm hungry. May bilihan ba ng snacks dito?" she asks roaming her eyes around.

"Wala. Pero marami namang resto sa labas. Gusto mo ba sa coffee shop? Gusto ko rin ng Spanish latte." 

She nodded. "Sure!"

"I can post some pictures and clips naman on my story 'no? Okay lang sa 'yo?" Coco asked when they got in the car.

"Oo naman. No problem."

"Thank you!" The smile on her lips remains. "I had fun. Favorite ko kanina 'yong galaxy tunnel kahit medyo nakakahilo, but ang ganda. Lalo na 'yong stars."

"Pareho kayo ng pamangkin ko. Favorite din nila 'yon dito." Harper reaches for his phone to search for a nearby well-reviewed cafe when a notification pops up on his screen.

"I mentioned you pala sa story pero maliit lang and I put your username in the same color as your shirt so they won't stalk you. But you can repost it on your profile if you want."

His lips curl up. "Talaga, ha? P'wede? 'Di ba ako aawayin ng fans ni Ax?"

"No. Don't worry about them—" Her voice falls. "Oh."

Harper heaves his eyes, drawing them to her on the passenger seat. "Bakit?"

"Nag-view na agad si Ax. He even sent a heart."

"See!" Harper grins. "I really think it's a sign. Pati 'yong fan na may mukha niyang binigay sa 'yo kanina."

"Of what na naman?"

"It's a sign you're not completely over him tapos . . ." He lingers which made her brows knit together.

"Tapos what?"

"Let's say he cares about you," Harper says to finish it off.

Napasinghal naman si Coco dahil do'n. "You know if he cares about me, he would remember how I confessed two years ago."

"Ha?" His eyes widened. "You confessed? So hindi niya alam?"

Coco shook her head. "He doesn't have any idea."

"How did you . . . I mean, bakit? Anong nangyari? Kaya ka ba nag-stop? Kasi sabi mo two years ago?"

"Yes. It was two years ago. I planned on telling him at the eve of his birthday. But he got so drunk kasi may pre-birthday party siya with his friends sa bar. As in wasted drunk." She shut her eyes closed as the memory comes back to the surface.

"And then?"

"And then I went to the party kahit ayaw ko because I don't drink much naman but for the whole night I tried to get my timing. Kaso occupied naman siya with his friends so okay, I sat it out for the whole party. Ako rin DD naming dalawa kasi I also told him I won't drink so he can enjoy his pre-birthday celeb." Her stomach churns and beating in her chest goes heavy. Inabot naman ni Harper 'yong kamay niya.

"If hindi pleasant sa 'yo 'yong memory, okay lang. 'Di mo kailangang sabihin. Sorry kung pinipilit ko ata 'yong question ko sa 'yo kanina," he says.

"No, it's okay. Gusto ko rin sabihin. Baka kapag sinabi ko mas mawala siya sa sistema ko and maybe I can really move forward once I get rid of it."

Harper nods. "Okay. Pero 'wag mo pilitin kung hindi kaya. Basta makikinig lang ako dito."

"Thank you." A sad smile paints on her lips, and her heart easily goes back to its steady rhythm. He was still the Harper he knew way back in college. Magaan kasama at magaan kausap.

"We went home to his house tapos lasing siya. But I know Ax when he's drunk. Functioning pa naman isip niya so he still responds properly when you're talking to him," Coco continues. "So no'ng nahatid ko na siya sa room niya and I cleaned him up and helped him with some water, I tried to—" she breathes and swallows. "I tried to tell him when he got settled sa bed."

"Oh . . ." Harper nods.

"I lied there with him sa bed niya and told him everything that even if he annoys me all the time, he's the only person allowed to annoy me and get on my nerves, and that he makes me laugh and I like how he peels and prepares my snacks for me. That I love him." Flashes of that night made her eyes gloss. "He was looking at me and then he was asking me if totoo raw ba sinasabi ko and I told him it's true and then he kissed me before he fell asleep."

A tear falls down her cheek and she can feel Harper glancing at her direction every now and then.

"Kailangan mo ba ng tissue—"

"No, I'm fine," she cuts him off, taking the handkerchief from her handbag. "May panyo naman ako. Sorry for crying."

"Okay lang."

The nearby cafe was a fifteen minute drive and they got there for less. Nasa parking lot na ulit sila but Harper decided they could stay longer in the car.

"He forgot."

"Nakalimutan niya?" he asks.

Tumango si Coco. "Yes. In the morning he forgot which never happens. Pero that time when I needed him to remember, nakalimutan niya talaga. And then . . ." She chews inside her lip.

"And then?"

"And then he was with another girl that same time I was begging him to remember." Bitterness sprawled all over her tongue. Hindi pa siya umiinom ng kape pero ang pait na.

"Oh." His shoulders slump. "Ayon lang."

"That's why I hate him. I felt so disregarded. Kahit common courtesy man lang, wala. I felt like lahat ng sinabi ko sa kanya the previous night dineretso niya lang sa bin." Mariing napalunok si Coco. "I felt trashed."

"'Di rin kita masisisi," sabi ni Harper. "Pero tingin mo talaga 'di niya maalala? Sabi mo 'di ba naaalala niya naman palagi? Or baka bad timing? Kailangan mo ulitin confession mo kasi sobrang intoxicated siya?"

"I don't care. Ayaw ko na. Whether he's pretending na nakalimutan niya or he really did forgot about it, ayoko na," she says in finality.

Harper treated her some sweets. Coco was surprised to see a slice of cheesecake, three macarons, and a strawberries and cream croffle when he got back to their table.

"Ang dami," sabi niya habang tinitingnan 'yong mga pagkain.

"Kailangan mo 'yan. Sweet treats. Sana hindi ka nagda-diet ngayon."

She shakes her head. "I'm not on a diet naman but ang dami talaga."

He chuckles. "Kasi nga kailangan mo ng treat."

Coco smiles. "Thank you. Sorry for baring on you. Pero ayon, thank you for listening. I hope you treat my secret as your own."

"No problem and no worries din. Naiintindihan ko naman. Promise I'll treat your secret as mine basta titikman mo 'tong ube macaron. Best seller daw nila, e."

Natawa si Coco. "Sure!" She picks up the purple macaron on the plate and Harper watches her intently as she takes a bite.

"Masarap?" he asks.

Coco chewed slowly as she allows the favor profile to coat her tastebuds before she nods. "Masarap. You should try it."

"Ayon! Buti naman. Coco approved."

"Ikaw talaga!" Pinanlakihan niya ng mata si Harper. "Anong Coco approved?"

"Malay mo ilagay nila 'yan dito sa cafe nila. Coco Illaraza approved kasi nagustuhan mo 'yong best sellers." Harper chucks in a whole ube macaron into his mouth.

"I doubt they need that. I think famous naman 'tong cafe nila," she comments. Coco was roaming her eyes around the place when her phone buzzes inside her bag.

Ax
Ang saya saya mo naman dun sa pinost mo
Siya ba kumuha nun? Tapos na ba kayo?
Pauwi ka na?

Her face immediately turns sour.

Ax
San kayo?
Sunduin na kita

"Ax?" Harper asks.

"Sino pa ba?" She rolls her eyes again.

"I knew it."

She took a quick sip on her Spanish latte. "Can I tell you something pero please, don't be mad?"

"Bakit?" He wipes off his lips with a napkin. "Ano 'yan?"

"I kinda used your name," she says embarrassingly.

"Used my name? Saan?"

"Kay Ax. When he asked about you no'ng nasa parking lot. I told him what we were in college na previous suitor kita tapos I said a little lie. Sabi ko I used to like you back then."

"Ha?" His eyes widened. "Ba't mo sinabi 'yon?"

"Kasi I wanted to see his reaction. Pero parang wala naman so, there. It's useless, I'm sorry."

"Hmm . . ." He lingers, pressing his back against the cushion. "Ayos lang. Pero I don't think it's useless."

"Why do you think so?"

He shrugs. "I just know na hindi useless."

***

It was past eight o'clock when she got home. It wasn't a long drive, but they didn't notice the time at the cafe. They talked about a lot of things and time simply flew by.

"'Wag kang bababa," he says when he pulled over on the driveway.

"Why?"

He cocks his head to the gate. "Inaabangan ka ni Ax."

"Oh . . ." He was right. Ax was standing there with arms crossed over his chest.

"Test ko ba theory natin kanina sa coffee shop?" Harper suggests.

"No need naman."

"Ay, hindi. Gusto kong i-test para makita ko result." He unfastens his seatbelt. "Ganito, ako magbubukas ng pinto mo d'yan tapos kunwari bibigyan kita ng goodnight kiss sa pisngi, okay? Sakyan mo na lang, magaling ka d'yan. Artista ka, e."

"Ha?" Coco scoffs. "What for?"

"Wala, pang-asar lang sa kanya. Basta sakyan mo na lang ako," he says sounding so excited with his plan.

"Okay, sure."

They proceeded with Harper's scheme. As promised, he opened the door for her and Coco tried to keep herself from laughing too much because the idea was so stupid. Instead, she musters a smile for Harper.

"Thank you," she says when he offered a hand to help her down. Kitang-kita niya naman sa gilid ng mata niya 'yong paggalaw ni Ax. From leaning against the post, he stood up straight and his crossed arms were now undone, hands inside his pocket.

"Nag-enjoy ka naman 'di ba?" tanong ni Harper.

"Of course I did." She swallows when she saw his movement. Ax was taking a few steps towards them.

"Very good." Harper leans to her cheek when an arm swiftly snakes around her shoulder. Ax tries to pull her closer so Harper won't be able to kiss her.

Pero hindi rin siya nagpatinag. He allows his lips to touch just a sliver of her hair whispering good night before taking a step back.

"See you again next time?" he says.

Coco nods. "Yup. See you next time."

"Hindi," Ax intervenes. "Bawal na."

A grin creeps on Harper's lips. "That's not up to you." He brings his eyes back to Coco. "Goodnight, I had great time."

"Same. Goodnight," she says back. Harper squeezes her hand before he decides to go back into his car. He gives them both a beep before driving off.

"Bawal. Ayaw ko," Ax repeats as they walk inside the house.

Napasimangot si Coco. "Hindi mo narinig si Harper 'no? He said it's not up to you. And I really wanna go out with him—"

She was cut off when she felt his fingertips brushing her cheek—the same cheek Harper kissed.

"Ayoko."

Coco swats his hand away. "I don't care."

It was beginning to rise in her stomach again, especially with the idea Harper planted inside her mind.

So what was the result of his theories?

"Ang dami kong text sa 'yo. Sabi ko kanina 'wag kang magpapahatid sa kanya kasi susunduin kita. Bakit 'di ka nag-reply kahit isang beses?" Ax says, trailing behind her. Muntik na rin niyang saraduhan ng pinto sa mukha si Ax. Only if he wasn't so quick enough with his steps. Sayang.

"And I told you to go home, right? I told you I don't want to see your face when I get back. Nakinig ka ba?"

"Coco, naman," his voice falls, reaching for her arm.

Inalis lang ni Coco 'yong kamay niya. Mustering indifference with him proves to be more difficult than it used to be. She stays silent, allowing him to watch her movements. To watch her ignore all of his advances when she knew perfectly that at the end of the day, he'll be with another girl.

"Natanggap mo ba 'yong email? May cameo project tayo in three weeks," he says in attempt to get a response from her.

But Coco reaches for her towel instead. She went inside the bathroom, finally slamming the door to his face.

Coco sucks in some air. It's a skill, alright. Pretending that she doesn't care takes a lot, but she knew this was for the best. This was for herself.

Keeping her mind from diving into every idea floating inside her head was as difficult as ignoring him. Coco tried to operate on autopilot just to keep herself together. She believes na wala siyang mapapala kung magpapadala siya.

Ax was just tripping. Everything he says and does is not true.

Coco got dressed in her matching lilac pajamas. To say that she was surprised to see him on her bed was an understatement. She took her time soaking in the tub in hopes that after two hours, he'll be gone.

But Axel Young was on her bed, legs and arms crossed, seemingly waiting for her to finish cleaning up. Coco sits down in front of her vanity for her nighttime skincare routine when she hears a rustle from the bed.

"What are you still doing here?" Coco asks when she feels his presence behind her. "Wala ka bang booty call? They probably miss you."

"Wala," Ax responds, unwrapping the towel on her head. "Wala na."

She squirms. What a lie. "Well, never say never."

"Anong ginawa n'yo kanina?" Ax takes the blower again to dry her hair. "Kuwentuhan mo naman ako."

Coco stays mum. She figured it's best na hayaan si Ax sa trip niya. She just focused on doing her skincare. Mabilis din namang natuyo 'yong buhok ni Coco.

"Coco," he calls, but she continues to ignore. She stood up ready for bed. She tucks herself in, opening the night lamp when Ax also settles beside her.

"Coco," he says again in a soft voice. It falls to her stomach, setting off the butterflies.

"Nakakainis ka na!" She snaps. "Can't you take a hint? I'm ignoring you na nga 'di ba? I even told you to go home pero nandito ka pa rin? And what did you do earlier no'ng hinatid ako ni Harper? You reprimanded from seeing him again kasi ano? What the hell is your reason?"

"Kasi gusto ko ako lang ka-date mo." He pauses, reaching for her arm underneath the sheets. "Buong araw akong naiinggit dito. Buong araw din akong naghihintay sa reply mo. Wala man lang akong narinig sa 'yo."

"Bullshit." Her jaw clenches. "Stop making fun of me. I know you're just bored and wala kang ibang makita aside from me, but cut the crap. Just go back to your girls. Marami naman sila, right? Just go and be with them. 'Wag mo na 'kong idamay sa trip mo." Coco turned her back from him when she feels her cheeks heating up. She doesn't need this now. Coco had just made her resolve so why was he confusing her?

"Hindi kita pinagti-trip-an," he says, but there's no way in hell she'll ever believe that.

The sheets rustles as he moves around, as he inches towards her. His arm wraps around her waist and he pulls her closer. "Na-miss naman talaga kita buong araw. Ikaw lang din inisip ko."

Coco swallows, trying her best to let his statement out on the other ear.

"Bakit n'ong tayo magka-date no'ng isang araw, 'di ka ngumingiti sa 'kin? Tapos kay Harper kanina tuwang-tuwa ka do'n sa story na nasa profile mo," he says and her heart beats heavy. "Naiinggit ako."

"Inggit na inggit ako," Ax whispers, sounding so defeated. "Okay, sige. Bukas uuwi na ako. Pero payakap, please. Kahit five minutes lang."

She sighs as his arm wraps more tightly. The air grows thick when she tries to breathe in but her heart suspends in a line—two skipping beats pass by and he makes breathing even harder when he buried his face in her hair.

Coco shuts her eyes closed, trying to repress the churning in her stomach and the forgone memories rising to the surface. She holds on to the last bit of her sanity. She holds on to the reasoning voice in her mind as it trails and wavers to a whisper when his warmth slowly envelops her skin.

All of the reasons she had fizzled, dissipating in the air. They were all lies. There's no reason for her to believe him. It's lies. Tomorrow, he'll be with another girl again. Tomorrow, he'll forget this ever happened. Tomorrow, he'll throw her out to the bin.

But then his lips lands softly at the back of her head. "Goodnight, Coco," Ax whispers so gently.

She swallows as her heart falls in her stomach. A heavy beat crashing her resolve. The ripple washed over her as Coco tried so hard to fight whatever this was. But she was trembling. Her knees were already kissing the ground and she was beat.

Maybe this isn't the time to fight the waves.

Ax gently turns her around and she was too weak to fight him off. Hinayaan niya na lang.

A faint smile graces his face when their eyes meet. Hindi naman kumikibo si Coco. She just watched him take his fingertips to his lips before the same hand reaches out to touch her cheek.

"Goodnight."

She falls and crashes on the landing.

Ax pulls her again in a tight embrace.

Okay, just this once. Maybe this was a time she could allow herself to sink into her whims. Maybe it wasn't so bad . . . just this once.

Because tonight feels like her wishful thinkings could come true. No matter how far that seems. Tonight she feels like he loves her too.

Coco shakes her head.

Just this once.

Tonight, a dream she once had can come true and then she can pretend none of this existed tomorrow.

🥕

#hardlytheirs

Happy August! 🧡