When S'vel-hen entered the kitchen area of their home, she found a despondent O'vel-win half lying upon the table. Her third son's head was resting upon his crossed arms which in return rested upon the thick wood. His warm eyes looked distant and in deep, but saddened thought. As was her first instinct, she rushed to his side.

"Son, what is wrong?" She asked, a million worries flying through her mind; was he sick? Was his job on the line? What he said next was nothing like what she armoured herself to hear.

"I think I am in love," he said, with so much angst one would have thought that the world was nearing its end.

S'vel-hen blinked a few times and asked him to repeat his words, which he did so and these were equally as weighted down in his tone. "I don't understand," she said, finally. "What is wrong about being in love? Is this not a good thing?"

"No," he insisted, sadly. "Loving that person is not fruitful."

Ah, S'vel-hen thought, so the young lady in question was considered unreachable to him. This could only mean, S'vel-hen thought, that the family of the young woman was of much higher standing and would never approve of their daughter marrying her son. She sighed, believing this to be due to his chosen career as their family, while not wealthy, were considered very respectable as they dealt with the creation, care and teaching of books. "If this person's family cannot see what you offer," she said, warmly, "then it is their loss."

"It is not a case of their family being a problem," he sighed, lifting himself from the table to look at her. "Although I doubt they would approve."

"It's not?" S'vel-hen questioned, unable to think of what other obstacles could be standing in the way of her son finding happiness with the person he had fallen for. "But then what is it? Why can you not be together?"

His expression turned slightly pained and he looked down at the table and began scratching along the grain as if finding it fascinating in that moment. "Will you promise not to hate me?" He asked, the pleading note in his voice worrying her greatly. In the end, she could only nod. He was her son, why would he ever think she had the capability to hate him? "That person... that person is a man."

Her heart felt as if it had faltered in her chest and her blood felt frozen. She was shocked by his revelation and couldn't help but question it. "Are you sure what you feel is love and not maybe admiration?" She asked, her mind whirling with thoughts. It was not unheard of for a man to be married to another man; such was usually performed for reasons such as connecting families when there were no women born or because one man was dying and a widowed man would find it easier to find another bride than a widowed woman finding a new husband. But those marriages were never about love, love was between a man and a woman... wasn't it?

She glanced at her son's pitiful face and thought about what he had begged her, but no matter what, she really did not hate him. She was just confused for him.

"Admiration..." O'vel-win murmured to himself. "I did admire him," he admitted after a moment. "He is only my age, yet he is the head of his family. He puts them first each and every time, even bending the boundaries of tradition to ensure not only their survival, but that his little sister's future path is more open. He works hard, but not only that he clearly loves his work. Yes, maybe you are right, mom." His conflicted expression became clear, but S'vel-hen felt nothing but guilt. She had seen the softness of her son's eyes as he described that person, heard the warmth of his words and knew; his feelings were definitely not as simple as admiration.

"Admiration makes clear sense," O'vel-win repeated, ignoring the pain in his chest and burying it down. "I must be confused and lonelier than I realised. Perhaps I should try to find a wife, then the confusion will be completely cleared away, don't you think? Will you help me, mom?"

How was she supposed to say no to this?

And so they went to the family matchmaker, O'vel-win's great aunt J'lin-lin. The woman was honest about O'vel-win's prospects, his career was not a great point, even though he was a good, kind and jovial man. She had a few girls whose own matchmaker's were seeking a match within the Win family in mind. These girls were from less prosperous families and could not be so fussy if they wished for an easier life. O'vel-win earned well, even if the position was questionable to some.

The first girl to meet with him happened to be from a farming family, but hers focused on food crops such as grain. Such work involved long, arduous hours, but although the crops did not take as long to grow as trees, the rewards were not as great. Many girls sought to marry out of their families thinking that they will gain an easier life. This girl was no exception.

Her appearance was fairly plain, not ugly, but she could not be considered pretty either. Her otherwise smooth skin was coated in freckles that had clearly deepened in the intense sun she was exposed to. Her eyes did not sparkle when she looked at him, she seemed resigned that he was as high as she could reach. The feeling left a bitter taste in his mouth. Their respective aunt matchmaker's could clearly see that there was no chemistry between them and that they both would grow to resent their pairing, so decided to end the meeting cordially and swiftly.

The next girl was from a family much like his own, one that worked with books, but there's was a smaller family and only one uncle had risen to becoming a scribe. The others dealt with turning wood into paper and paper into books, so it could be considered as a family with just slightly less standing than their own.

At first sight, O'vel-win could clearly see that the girl was very attractive. She was quite tall, with wide hips and a generous bosom. Her face was proportioned well with bright eyes and full lips and her skin was clear and flawless. He wondered why she had not yet married. And then she spoke. Her voice was grating, like nails down a chalk board. The girl was open mouthed, quite opinionated making it abundantly clear that if O'vel-win wanted a relationship with her, then he ought to change career paths immediately. This meeting ended more swiftly that the first, the girl's aunty embarrassed and his own just couldn't wait to get the girl out of her home.

"You may not be the kind of catch that a librarian is," J'lin-lin stated, "but that does not mean I will chain you to such trash!"

The third girl was by far the most pleasant he had met so far. Her face was a little pretty, but not beautiful. She was fairly petite and quite round, but she was amicable. She asked him about his career with no condemnation or hints that she did not approve. Her family were traders, they travelled from one end of the country to the others, taking crafts that would otherwise not be seen to towns that wanted to see them. They tended to trade more in coin than in food as this was needed to buy more crafts to sell rather than food that just got eaten. However, she was tired of the unending travel and longed to settle down. She did not mind his career, just hoped to get along with him.

O'vel-win felt that she was perhaps the best choice for a wife, though his matchmaker aunt was not entirely convinced. As her family would move on in less than a month, they would need to decide about her swiftly and J'lin-lin was worried that they would be moving too fast. So the woman went to arrange another meeting, feeling that they could squeeze in just one more before a decision needed to be made about the trader girl, while she left O'vel-win to contemplate.

In order to do so, O'vel-win went for a long walk and ended up back in town. As his stomach rumbled, having been forced to abide while O'vel-win was deep in his own thoughts, he decided to purchase a few snacks with the little coin he had on his person. He was munching away on them beneath the shade of a tree, when H'lua-win caught sight of him.

H'lua-win had not completely let go of her puppy crush, but at the same time had accepted it was not meant to be between them. Honestly, while her mother was ranting and raging that O'vel-win was meeting with potential brides while a perfectly good one (H'lua-win) was sitting pretty right in their own mountain, she realised that she could not see herself being wed to him. She even began to wonder what it was that she saw in him.

She thought back and realised that it was his kindness and smile that had first gained her attention. In truth, he was kind to everyone, not just the smaller her that had tripped and scuffed her knee. He had not been a good looking boy and even now he was not a handsome man, but his smile lit up his face giving you the impression that he was the most attractive man around. When her mother had first noticed her childish infatuation about him, the older woman had encouraged it to the point that she would not see beyond him.

However, once he had rejected her, she had been forced to open her eyes and realised that it was not him she really wanted. He was her cousin and lived close by as part of the same family estate. She really did not want to stay in the Win family home forever, she longed to know what was out there, beyond it. It was her mother that did not want to let her go, so found the perfect husband in O'vel-win to ensure that she remained.

Seeing the clear uncertainty in his face, she went to greet him, even sat down beside him. "Hey, cousin," she greeted. "I've been hearing much about you recently."

"Gossip through our mountain spreads faster than fire through a dry forest," O'vel-win snorted and she laughed in agreement. "So you have heard I am looking for a wife?"

"Yes," she agreed. "But why do you seem unhappy about that?"

"I am not," he lied, crossing his arms about his chest. "Sure you are not seeing things under the circumstances?"

"I am not," she replied. "I am happy you rejected me. I think you would not have made me happy in the end if you had married me. You would have made my mother happy though." She nudged him with her elbow as she said this with joyful tease.

"Okay, I am conflicted," he agreed. "I feel like I am just settling, not really accepting. Would I really come to love the girl I agree to wed in the end?"

"Why do you need to settle?" H'lua-win asked, curiously. "You don't want a sister for a wife. A good love is elusive, but it's wasteful to settle just because it might not happen."

"I think it might have happened," O'vel-win sighed. "But that person is unattainable, so I thought to cover my feelings with new ones." H'lua-win suddenly slapped his arm. "Ouch," he complained. "What was that for?"

"You!" She said, fiercely and angry. This man was not the one she had had a crush on for so long. This man was so apathetic it was annoying her. "How dare you use those girls in that way! Even if those girls were not perfect, seeking marriage for impure reasons, they still want to be loved for themselves, not as a substitute!" She sighed and forced down her anger. "And this person, are they married?" He shook his head in denial. "Then how are they unattainable? Have you expressed your feelings?"

"No," he again denied. In fact he had been convinced that admiration was all it was, until H'lua-win had sat beneath the tree, stirring memories of when they last met up beneath the shade of the tree and K'tai-tul was with them. His heart had warmed and felt like it had begun to truly beat for the first time in a long while.

"Then how do you know that they are beyond you?" H'lua-win stood up and placed her hand upon her hip, ready to lecture her cousin. "Even if the chance of being with them is tiny, it is not impossible. Tell that person how you feel, tell her and accept whatever she has to tell you. If it is rejection, then give yourself time to let the feelings go before finding someone new. And if it is not..."

O'vel-win smiled, her heart skipped a beat and she sighed. If only he wasn't her cousin, he would have been perfect for her. "Thank you, H'lua-win," he said. "I hope you get what you are seeking as well."

"Oh don't worry," she replied, tartly. "I will."

Author's note; Wattpad was not saving the edits properly for this, so there may still be mistakes.