──────────────
'WISH YOU WERE SOBER'
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♡

Mina's bed was warm and soft, and the Saturday-relief made her bury her head further into the pillow. Her groggy, waking thoughts decided that today would be a dorm day, and she'd sleep until noon at the very least—or until her body felt like anything other than dead weight.

But then last night came crashing back, and she sat bolt upright. Flashes of memories filled her head: some so bizarre it was hard to tell if she just dreamed it all.

Truth or dare...Harry kissing her...arguing with Charlie...Cormac...her spiked drink...then nothing. She strained her brain to remember what the hell happened between then and now, but nothing came to mind.

The curtains of her four-poster bed were drawn, encasing her in darkness with a little bit of sunlight peeking through the edges. She rubbed her eyes, but stopped once she felt the make up still on her face. No matter how tired she was, Mina always took off any make up she'd been wearing before bed. But there it was: smudged mascara and glitter on her knuckles.

Wait...

Mina kicked off the cosy blanket off and froze. She was still wearing last night's clothes, minus the shoes, but that's not what caught her attention. No, what caught her attention was the fact that this blanket was maroon. The pillow was maroon. The curtains were maroon.

This was not her bed.

Then a door opened.

"I know everyone's talking about it, but you can't hide on the couch all day mate," Ron's voice said outside the four-poster bed. Mina stayed quiet, unsure if he was speaking to her or not, when someone else already in the dorm replied.

"I'm not hiding," he said quietly. She'd know Harry's voice anywhere—even if it was more of a drawl with his hungover morning voice. So she was in his dorm. He was on the couch. Which meant...

Her face turned so red that it probably matched the colour of the bedsheets. Harry's sheets.

"Whatever you say," Ron sighed, spoke quieter. "But McLaggen left for the train an hour ago. You don't need to play bodyguard anymore."

Left for the train?

Silence passed for a moment. Although Mina couldn't see their faces, she knew there was something being exchanged with their expressions.

It was only when the door shut again that she tentatively drew open the curtains. She squinted against the harsh daylight, disorientated as the bed seemed to sway beneath her.

"...Hey," she heard Harry say. Mina hummed in response as she stood, still dazed, and nearly toppled over as the room spun. She squeezed her eyes shut, wincing, and then Harry's hands were on her arms, keeping her balanced, telling her to take it easy.

She almost gave in to it. Almost blushed at his touch. But, as she recalled the look on Charlie's face when Harry kissed her, and then the following argument, and just the chaos that this boy brought to her life in just a few seconds, Mina shrugged his hands away, and scanned the carpet for her shoes.

"Mina—"

"Don't," she cut him off, pushing the messy hair from her face. She slipped past him, and almost tripped over a stack of books. Where the hell are those stupid shoes?

"C'mon, Mina. Talk to me," he said, but she didn't reply, and instead pushed around stuff on the floor, looking under things, trying to find her boots underneath the mess of this boy dormitory. All this shit on the floor and yet no shoes.

"Mina. Look at me."

She dropped a pile of wrinkly shirts and bit her tongue, holding back a hurl of insults. Turned around to see what the hell he wanted--just to see her boots dangling in the air as he clutched the laces.

"Give them back," she mumbled, pushing down the instinctive butterflies in her chest at his messy hair, the slightly-too-big sweater he'd thrown on, the sleepiness in his eyes. Hell, even the bruise on the side of his jaw where McLaggen punched him. The morning version of him was infuriatingly gorgeous, and it just made her more mad. Who gave him the right to fuck everything up and still look hot with a hangover?

"Come get 'em," he said nonchalantly, and as she grumbled over towards him. But just as she made to snatch them out of his hands, he held them up above his head so she couldn't reach. Mina glared daggers at him.

"Give them back."

"Nuh-uh. Not 'til you tell me what's wrong."

"What's wrong?" She stared at him, taken aback. Her chest tightened up. "What's your problem? Why the hell did you kiss me?"

"I'm sorry, I—"

"Charlie saw it and now he's not speaking to me! That's what's wrong!"

"I know, I know, and I'm sorry. Really." He lowered his arm. "I didn't know he was there and I had too much to drink and I... I made a mistake. I wasn't thinking."

A mistake. Her first kiss was a mistake. Now she felt like crying.

"But it wasn't a mistake; it was a choice." Mina said quietly. Suddenly everything was hurting. "All this time I've been helping you with Heather and then you go and kiss me as a dare? In front of her? In front of everyone?"

He pressed his lips together. No response.

She scoffed. "You don't get to do that, Harry. I'm your friend. I'm not something you can just use for a dare, and it isn't fair to Heather. What about her? She's practically your girlfriend and then you kiss someone else right in front of her? In front of a whole group? She must feel like an idiot." Mina swallowed thickly, looking away as her eyes started to water. "I feel like an idiot."

"I'm sorry, Mins. I'm really sorry. It was stupid." he shook his head. "I'll tell Charlie it was my fault. And I'm sorry I brought you here, too, after...y'know."

"Cormac?" she sniffled, looking up.

"Yeah," he said softly, studying her face. "I knew you'd be mad at me. And I know I should've taken you to the hospital wing or your common room or something—but it was late and you passed out and...you know how I get. Especially when it comes to McLaggen." He cleared his throat. "It felt like you'd be safest here."

Mina nodded, chewing on her cheek as her face grew hot.

"He didn't...he didn't do anything, did he? Other than the drink?" Harry asked quietly, putting her boots by her feet.

She shook her head, and he let out a breath. Again, she felt like crying, because what if Harry hadn't stepped in? She was alone, she was vulnerable, and Cormac was right there and...

"It was scary," she said quietly, almost inaudibly. It was an understatement, but it's all she could manage. Now it was all coming back to her and she didn't want it to, she really didn't, but she didn't know how to process it all.

"It would've been," Harry said softly, so softly. She's never heard him speak so softly before. There was something in his gaze she didn't recognise.

Her lip trembled. She didn't want to cry. She wanted to be mad—at Harry, at Cormac, at everything. But then the tears were streaming down her face and there was no stopping them now.

"C'mere," He said.

And she wasn't going to give in. She wasn't. She'd really rather be across the castle from him right now, anyway, but something inside her still drew her to him. Something inside her needed him near. Needed his safety. So she leaned into him, letting him hold her even when it just made everything hurt even more. Even though it just made everything worse.

Because that kiss? Maybe it didn't mean anything. Maybe he was just drunk. Maybe it was just the whiskey. And that was okay. She was fine about that. Perfectly, irrevocably okay and content and comfortable about that. At least, that's what she was trying to convince herself of as she stood there in his arms.

But underneath those thoughts was a smaller one, a less-noticeable one. The one that yearned for him. The one that lit up when his lips met hers beneath the confusion in that moment. The one that felt the electricity, the warmth. The one that hurt the most to think about because she knew it was true.

I wish you were sober.

♡

a/n

TRADE DRINKS BUT U DON'T EVEN KNOW HER SAVE ME TIL THE PARTY'S OVER KISS ME IN THE SEAT OF YOUR ROVER REAL SWEET BUT I WISH U WERE SOBERRRR

also new conan album coming soon?????? HELLOOOO?????

anyways

ily all!!! hope u liked the chapter!!!

ALSO, i have a tiktok! it's on my linktree which is in my bio!! i wanna start posting stuff about the new (real, not fanfic) book i'm working on and also gives updates on my fanfics, etc! <333

AND THANK U FOR EVERYONE REMINDING ME TO UPDATE HAHAHA

I'LL SEE U ALL SOON

-g <33