chapter 13: no soul to save

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When the last of the churchgoers had left and the door had been shut, Sina stepped from around the tree and stood in the yard. The clouds, having parted not a handful of moments ago, returned with a vengeance. The rain began to fall and it felt like a multitude of pins upon Sina's face.

"I really hope you stop off an Evens for some cake and not forget it because of your ol' church and your ol' hymn singing," he grumbled hoping Cookie would remember to visit the bakery. Looking at the building through a wet curtain of long hair that lay plastered across his face, Sina added, "Chocolate almond cake....fuck, even that sticky jammy one with the cherry filling will do." Lifting his gaze to the cross on the roof, Sina cringed. "Well, maybe not the jammy one. That damn red food coloring they use looks too much like blood."

As he stuffed his hands in the pockets of his jacket, Sina felt a vile chill crawl up his pants leg. "Nuuuhuhhh...get the fuck away." He rubbed one leg with the other realizing he was standing in the center of a small, yet very angry swirl of wind. Grumbling, he took a few steps closer to the sanctuary of the church's walls and felt the building block the annoying wind from trying to creep up. "Good for one thing," Sina said under his breath as if not really wanting anyone to hear him.

There was candlelight in the windows. Though it was still morning, it was dark enough to illuminate the flames. Sina watched the flames sway. They reminded him of dancing. Not the stripping kind he did for disgusting oglers, but the slow, sweet dancing between lovers. Pulling his hands out of his pockets, he threw his arms around himself and shivered. "Don't even remember what it's like to dance like that." Sina frowned and looked down to the ground where a pebble poked out from a little puddle. "Oh, go away." Digging his toe into the mud, Sina kicked the rock and it flew a few feet away.

"You're going to get sick standing there in the pouring rain, friend." When the stranger's voice reached him from the open door of Saint Aggy's, Sina gasped and looked up. An unexplainable warmth, as if he had just slithered into a bubble bath, washed over him. Taking two steps backward, Sina put distance between himself and the stranger.

Darkness blanketed the man. Though Sina couldn't see his face, he saw he was wearing all black.

"Friend, I said you're going to get –"

"Won't get sick or nothing," Sina spat through the falling rain.

"Where's your umbrella? Why are you standing there? Service is over. If you're waiting for someone, I'm afraid they have already left."

"To answer your questions; I used to have one but it broke. I don't know. And I'm not waiting for no one."

"You need shelter. Can I offer any assistance?" The man asked. He took a step forward revealing the fact that his black clothes were clerical and there was the tell-tale priest's collar around his neck.

Sina scrambled backward so quickly, he nearly fell. A swarm of butterflies invaded his chest and bashed against his ribs in confusion and awe. He is perfect. The image of the priest ticked every single box of the Ideal Guy but it also ticked one big NO WAY box. Looking from the priest to the building he quickly shook his head and tried to speak through a mouthful of drool. "'Fraid I'd turn into stone, padre."

A chuckle, smooth and thick as honey found that constant horrible feeling inside Sina. It made him wish he'd never followed the singing because something inside him felt good around his man.

"No one ever turned into stone from entering a church."

Sina pushed annoying hair from his eyes. "That's what you think, padre."

"My name is Father Caleb Hill. You can call me Cal if you like."

Sina bit his lip. His gaze lingered on Father Caleb's face for longer than it should have. Damn...

"Friend?" Cal said softly.

Sina shook his head. "Ain't a friend," he whispered.

"Are you OK? Do you want to..."? Cal gestured to the door.

Sina felt himself falling into a velvety void where small, insignificant things were heightened – like the way his lashes briefly met when he blinked and the gentle creak coming from the hinges of the door. Through the sheets of rain, he saw nothing but Father Caleb. Behind flesh, in the cage where Sina kept his heart, he felt an ache. "I can't," he uttered like a creature caught in a trap.

"Why not?"

Sina stared silently at Caleb. "I know your type," he heard Cody say, "Dark hair, taller, older. Probably someone who'd never step foot in Purgatory. Someone you think would never want someone like you. Ammi right?" "Yah..."

Thunder crumbled around the churchyard. Sina felt the vibrations. Rain trickled through his lips. It felt like someone was pouring holy water down his throat. He swallowed and it burned. I'm drowning.

"You don't look so well," concern twined around Father Cal's words. "Maybe I can help?"

The priest stepped out from under the protection of the church. Sina noticed how he didn't bother going back for an umbrella. When the rain found Cal, it offered no mercy.

"God damn it," Sina cried as Father Cal came closer. He was falling deeper into the void, sinking further into that amazing warmth that spread from his fingertips right down to his dick. "Thanks for your help, padre, but ain't no salvation for aberrations like me. Fuck, I ain't even got a soul you can save." Before the security of the space between them vanished, Sina turned and ran off. 

*Fun Fact: I wanted Sina to fall hard and instantaneously. Do you believe in love at first sight or do you think it's something else? 

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