**Julia's POV**

"Welcome in, are you ready to learn and get to work?" Becky beamed from across the room as soon as the door opened.

"I think so," I muttered, fiddling with the bottom of my shirt. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to wear on my first day, so I opted for a white flowy top with flowers along the chest and arms. Becky rushed over to me, nearly knocking me over with the gust of wind that followed her. I teetered on my heels, hoping to find some stability by the end of the day. If I could make it through the first day, then that would mean I may have a chance at making it through this whole thing.

My mind was racing. I wasn't ready to start working, but I knew the group needed me to help out. I had planned on going to college and studying random things until I figured out what it was I actually wanted to do. Now I was in the college of life and I'd have to figure out how to navigate this new world.

"It's Julia right?" Becky questioned, holding a clipboard in front of her. When did she grab a clipboard?

"Yes," I mumbled once more.

"Great, I just needed to put it at the top of the watering chart, as we are going to have you learn how to water all the plants in the shop today. After we do that we may work on some other things, but usually, we like to just focus on one big thing at a time." Becky used her hand to show me the plants. This made me chuckle because it was like I couldn't see the giant wall of greenery surrounding us. This was a plant shop, after all.

"Awesome!" I tried to say with a little more confidence. I knew I could take care of plants, so if that's the main thing we were doing today, then I would have this under control.

"Let's get started." Becky took me towards the first row of plants. Small baby succulents sat upright in their perfectly spaced round pots. "This one is the row that takes the longest. We can't use the hose on succulents as they don't need that much water. That means we have to water each one of these by hands with these misters."

Becky held up a tiny gold water can with a spray nozzle on the end. Okay, maybe this was going to be harder than I had originally thought it would be. She handed me a second watering can and showed me how to spray the plants. I tried to copy her motions, making sure to not give the succulents too much water.

"There you go, now you are getting it!" Becky cheered, and her encouragement made me feel better about the job I was doing. I tried to take a deep breath, but the anxious feeling wouldn't seem to go away. I wasn't sure if it would ever go away. It felt like it was going to take over my whole body. I wasn't actually nervous about watering plants. I was nervous about every single time the front door opened and the bell above it let out its ring. My eyes darted over the client to make sure they didn't have either a gun or an alcoholic beverage because both have nearly killed me in the last few weeks. That was what really caused me anxiety.

"Perfect. Now that we are done with those, let me show you how we water the rest of the plants in the store. Maybe later today we will be able to go back to the greenhouse and repot some of the dying flowers and see if we can revive any of them." Becky seemed to love her job, and she had a happiness that just glowed from her. I hoped if I stuck by her some of that happiness would sink into me. The longer we were away from home, the more my happiness disappeared.

I wanted to be an adult, to be on my own, though. The inner conflict of my situation distracted me from everything I was supposed to be learning today. Would I remember any of this tomorrow? Oh god, I'd have to come back to work tomorrow too. I was so lucky that it was within walking distance from the house, but every step I take down the sidewalk was terrifying. The night I had been drugged, all I was trying to do was have a good time. I followed a man down the sidewalk and into an alley where he said his other friends were waiting. I shook my head, a throbbing feeling took hold.

The further away from the event, we got the more the memories started to come back to me. Maybe I was fabricating them, but maybe they were really there. Either way, everything seemed to scare me now.

I held the hose of running water in the tube I was told it needed to go. Becky had said there was a watering system and as long as we just made sure that was filled up every plant in the store would be watered throughout the day. The water danced against the tube, swirling down to a large tank hidden underneath the table. Small black hoses ran from the nozzle with little openings near each plant. Every fifteen minutes or so the nozzles would turn on and a small buzzing noise would fill the room as the plants took a quick drink of water.

The day seemed to go by quickly enough, and we even had time to repot a few plants in the back.

"Thank you so much for helping me out today," I muttered, it was nice to get to know Becky. She made things seem easier and I'd be lying if I didn't say I was excited to come back tomorrow.

"We will see you at the same time tomorrow. You did really good work today." Becky smiled, waving as I walked out the front door, onto the scary sidewalk.

**Aria's POV**

"How do you think their first days are going?" I fiddled with my fingernails, peeling the new polish off that I had just purchased a couple of days ago.

"I don't give a shit how they are doing at work." Breygan groaned, pulling another cigarette out of the pack. I tried to ignore the anger in his voice, replacing his voice with the sound of the waves crashing against the beach.

The wooden bench we sat at started to dig into the back of my spine, leaving a throbbing feeling where comfort should be. The waves were going to reach us soon, and I hadn't prepared to be kissed by the waves.

"We need to head in soon," I muttered. "So you need to hurry up and finish that one."

Breygan leaned forward, offering me the cigarette. This was the third one he'd had in a little under an hour. Why was he so stressed out? I shook my head, I didn't need to smell like smoke for the rest of the day, anyways I hated the feeling of the nicotine on my tongue. The way it tasted after a drag.

"I'll be in when I want to head in. You just go if you are so worried about it." He leaned back once more, taking another drag before blowing the smoke straight up into the air. No one was around, it was just the two of us sitting on a bench on the beach. We were so lucky to have access to this every single day, and the tan on my skin was starting to show the luxury of this life. Women would pay hundreds to keep this kind of tan up, I just had to sit outside for at least an hour a day, something I was defiantly not complaining about.

"What the fuck is your problem?" I snarled, my teeth gritted.

"I don't have a problem." Breygan seemed calm, it wasn't a shock after the three cigarettes he had just devoted. He put the third one out on the bench and threw the butt into the waves.

"You very obviously do, you haven't stopped puffing on those things since you bought them. You know how much everyone else would be if they knew you've been spending money on cigarettes. They are so damn expensive." Finally, some emotion was flowing out of me. My body was tense around Breygan, begging him to help me relax, but the more we stared at each other the more my body would lock up. I tried to shift on the bench to find somewhere more comfortable to sit. That only made things worse.

"I've got a lot on my mind, that doesn't mean I have a fucking problem." Breygan leaned back, even more, pulling the bench with him enough the feet left the ground.

"Stop that!" I shouted, leaning forward to help stabilize the seat.

"Stop being such a whiny bitch." Breygan muttered. His words filled with the kind of venom that would end relationships. If any other guy spoke to me that way I would have just walked away, but after knowing Breygan for years, I knew that he didn't mean what he said, that something else was bothering him. It didn't take away any of the hurt from his words though.

I stood up fully from the bench, and before I could even think about what I was doing, my hands were on his shoulders, pushing as hard as they could physically manage. The bench shot backward, launching Breygan into the sand.

"Maybe when you learn to stop being such a fucking asshole, we could actually have a good time. I'd go anywhere for you, but you are too much of a douche to get out of your own head!" The words flew out of me. I didn't even know what we were fighting about, Breygan would never let me in enough to know what was wrong with him. The startled look on his face showed that he wasn't expecting me to have reacted the way I did.

I hadn't expected it either.

I grabbed my things and stormed back towards the house, making sure to kick off as much of the sand as I could. I'd have to sweep the floor for the hundredth time later though, as there was no way to truly get all of the sand off. Breygan and I shared a room so that didn't feel like a safe space to go cool off. I opted to take a shower instead. At least in the shower, I'd be safe since I could lock the door.

I hadn't wanted to wash my hair today, so I pulled it up into a quick messy bun before stripping all my clothes off.

The warm water kissed my skin, taking away all the tension that the bench and Breygan had caused me. How could he go from being so sweet one second to the worst human on the planet the other? I didn't understand how his brain could keep up with the mental backflips, mine sure as hell couldn't.

I hadn't realized how much tension I was holding in my shoulders until they finally fell, the water soothing the muscle enough it agreed to let go of it's stiff hold. The emotions flowed freely in the shower, allowing me to feel every single one and decipher whether this was the one I needed to work through or if I needed to move on to the next. A melting pot of anger, sadness, embarrassment, disgust, and other emotions flowed inside me.

All I could feel was an overwhelming sadness taking hold of me.

The tears started falling as the water started getting cold, but I wasn't ready to get out yet. I turned the water off just for a moment, to allow it to heat up some more. But the cold air wrapped me in a sticky hold.

What had my life come to?