As I rode out my orgasm, I felt like I was riding cloud nine. After I had stopped moving,  I felt his fingers slowly and agonizingly pull out. I suddenly felt really tired, but I didn't close me eyes. I thought I couldn't get anymore flustered, until he looked me in the eyes and sucked my juices off slowly and made sure that I saw it. I whimpered quietly as his eyes stared into mine. I still throbbed between my legs.  

"Delicious." He smiled  

I blushed and started to get up. I was about retrieve the boxers when I felt a pinch on one of my hard nipples through my shirt. I groaned and leaned my head back as he started to twist.

"I never said you could get up."

I was about to protest when he thrusted his fingers back in. He slid them in and out agonizingly slow and I damn near screamed at the teasing.

When I looked at him, he had a Cheshire cat smile on his face. I pouted at him and all he did was laugh I was so close when he abruptly stopped all of it. I groaned at the loss and realized that he still held my nipple. The look he gave me dared me to protest.

"Why are you so cruel?" I asked him calmly

He smirked and released my nipple which felt weird as the blood rushed back into it. He kissed me again with such force and fervor that I fell onto my back and he climbed atop of me. He slowly settled atop of me and I felt his erection on the top of my mound. He put my legs around him and all that did was successfully help him grind his erection into me. I tensed and moaned as it rubbed against my cl!t, his mouth capturing mine to quiet me.

I threw my arms around his neck, too enveloped in pleasure to be ashamed. I couldn't believe this man wanted me. It was an amazing feeling of how safe I felt with him, how much I trusted him. 

He continued to move his hips against me and I arched my back, so close to coming again. I was so close!

And then he stopped.

Really!? I was going to hurt him....

"Wait." He said panting  

"Wait? What's wrong?" I groaned, annoyed.  

He stared at me with a straight face, but I could see a little fear too. Seeing that got rid of my annoyance 

"What? Tell me." I asked more urgently  

"Are you sure that you want to do this?" He asked me, staring straight into my eyes and no where else.  

"Yes." I said with strong conviction  

He closed his eyes and rubbed his face with one of his hands, hurriedly getting off of me and sitting next to me on the couch. Why did he look so disgusted with himself?

  unexplainably I felt my mood sour and I became upset. Why did he look that way after what we just did? 

"That was so wrong of me, I'm sorry." 

"It's okay Leo. I get it, it's just because it's me right?" I said, my voice wavering, standing up to retrieve the boxers on the floor.

"What? Ellie, what are you talking about?" He asked, trying to grab for me.

I stepped back from him feeling utterly ashamed of myself. After the way he looked at me I felt like i disgusted him once again.

"I'm sorry that I'm not a stick figured girl who's a drop dead beauty that all the guys lust after. No, I'm a plus sized black girl who knows what the hell she has to offer. I'm sorry that my size isn't to your liking."

It was just like Gary all over again. Even if he wasn't Gary...this situation feels like I've experienced it before, and it hurt.

"Ellie-"

"I think I should go."

I started to walk off when he seized my arm preventing me from moving another step.

"Why do you keep thinking that?" He asked

"I have eyes Leo. I saw how you looked at me just now."

"Pet, it's not you I swear."

"I don't want to hear it." I said

I walked towards the laundry room and stopped the moving dryer, taking my semi- damp clothes out of it.

"Ellie stop this." Leo pleaded behind me

"I'm just going to go home okay? Give you some time alone."

I turned around from the dryer and started leaving when he stepped in front of the door.

"Excuse me." I said

"Let me explain Ellie."

"There is nothing to explain. We were in the moment and then you got grossed out by me, problem solved."

"That's not it at all. If you would just hear me out you'd know what it truly is."

I rolled my eyes and put my hand on my hip.

"What then?"

I saw his eyes gloss over with anger.

"I know you're upset Pet, but you will not disrespect me."

"I'm sorry. Explain."

"Come with me to the living room now Pet, I'm not asking nicely."

He started walking towards the living room and I followed behind him quietly, clothes still in my hand. He ordered me to sit on the couch sternly and I did, feeling like a child as I did so.

"Before I start I will tell you that you are getting a spanking after I'm done with this conversation."

"For what--!?"

"Be quiet Ellie!" 

Wow....he really was mad.

I quieted down stared at him, waiting for him to go on as he started pacing in front of me.

"Look...it is not you that is the problem okay? Ellie, you're new to this and you're really special to me. I don't want to push you too fast and then you end up hating me afterward."

"Why would I hate you for giving me pleasure? I actually enjoyed myself."

He looked at me and slowly went to both knees in front of me and stared into my eyes.

"Really?" He asked surprised

"Yes. I was nervous at first, in fact...all morning and afternoon, but then I started getting into it more and then I finally just let go and started enjoying myself. But then.... you looked at me the way that you did and I got upset."

I couldn't believe tears started welling up in my eyes. I looked away from him and turned my head. 

"Ellie i'm sorry if i made you feel like you disgusted me. You don't, you never will." He said softly

I peeked back at him and he wiped my tears with his thumbs.

"Don't cry."

"I'm sorry I acted the way I did." I said

He kissed my forehead.

"It's okay Ellie. I want you to show me how you actually feel, let your emotions out so then I can make you feel better."

I nodded in understanding and then he got up, sitting on the couch cushion next to me.

"Now, you know what's next right?" He asked me

"Yes Sir." I replied, getting up

"Across my knee." He commanded

He took me by the arm and pulled me over until my stomach was in between the gap of his thighs. I felt him yank the back of his boxers down and felt the cool air once again hit me. I shivered, but more an anticipation than in pain.  He started rubbing the area and I laid there, waiting.

 "Tell me why you are being punished." He asked softly

 "Because I was disrespectful to Sir."  

  SMACK!  

  "Ah! "  

"And what else?" He asked

"I talked bad about myself?"

SMACK!

I jerked upwards a little bit in surprise. It was a lot harder than what he usually did. He held me down and caressed where he hit me.   

"Ten hits sounds good do you not agree Pet?" He asked me  

"Yes Sir." I replied  

"Good girl."  

I laid across his knee as he spanked me for being bad. I felt so naughty. I remember the distinct sting and warmth when he was done.   

"Get up."  

I scrambled to do as he told me and fixed my boxers. He stood menacingly in front of me, towering over me.  

"Each time you say something bad about yourself, the lashes go up by ten. Or, I'll choose another punishment. Do you understand Pet?"  

"Yes Sir."  

"Good. Very well composed for your first spanking, I'm proud of you." He smiled at me.  

After congratulating me, he flexed his hand and shook it.  

"You okay?"  

He smirked at me.  

"Yeah. You made my hand hurt. It's a good feeling though, I welcome the pain."  

"That doesn't sound too healthy." I remark as he walks by me.  

"On the contrary Pet, it's as healthy as living itself. Pain let's you know that you're alive. No matter how dead and numb you feel inside."  

That comment made me worry a little, but I said nothing as he walked into the kitchen.  

"I'm making me a milkshake, do you want one?" He asked me  

"Sure." I said quietly, going in there with him.

"Good. And then afterwards we can cuddle. I didn't hurt you too bad did I?" He asked

"No Sir." I smiled