I wrote this chapter again. I hope you like it and appreciate me by voting.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cg-V3jrxww8

This is an ost of a drama serial tabeer.
It reflects the same as what both are going through. And i personally love this track a lot 🖤

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After offering fajr prayers, I went back to bed. Still very tired. Just as I was about to drift into a peaceful slumber, when someone shoved her shoulder violently, making her jerk back and sit right up.

"Utho. Change Karo and come downstairs." His gruff voice reached her ears.

(Get up. Go change)

She looked up at him questioningly, rubbing her face.

"Noor. Training starts today. Now get up." He told her off into his infamous athoritive tone and went to the closet.

I laid back with the comforter fully covering me, with a content smile as I got to sleep again. Getting all the warmth I needed, I closed my eyes, not ten minutes into doze, when comforter was snatched off of me and there stood a pissed off Arman in his white t-shirt that clinged to his body with black sweatpants, all ready to go.

" Noor, three minutes. I am giving you three minutes, if you don't return in three minutes all changed. I'll myself do that for you." With clenched teeth and hard eyes he uttered.

I knew by the look he gave me, he was serious, so without wasting a second I sprinted to the washroom.

Wearing a sports bra and a loose shirt and leggings, I walked out making a bun. Arman who stood there on his phone, looked up and scrutinized me from top to bottom, his eyes turning a darker shade, burning with desire.

I looked away and made my way out, Arman followed behind. I made my way into the kitchen, to start preparing for breakfast.

Soon Aamina came with a grumpy face and Haris hot on her heels. Right after Armeen and Hira joined us alone with Haya and Daniyal.

Haya was supposed to stay at the Haveli till the situation was completely handled. We didn't even know how Haya was also a target but the males didn't want to take any chances, so they found it better for Haya to stay here. Daniyal came straight from his house I guess, cause he came from the front door and had his car keys in hand.

I along with the girls prepared a healthy breakfast just as Arman ordered, practically sitting on the counter inspecting everything.

///////////

We all the girls stood in a straight line facing the guys, as they leisurely stood there with hooded eyes, and straight face.

"So first we will teach you all some tricks of self defense. Then we'll move to weapons." Arman paced around us as he spoke. My eyes widened at the mere thought of me using a gun or knife for that matter.

Oh how amusing it will be for me to practice it on Arman first?

This whole thing was planned by Arman, as he felt the need to teach us some self defense. He thought it was for the best and to prepare us for the worst. Though they were sure they can protect us, but they didn't want us to just stay at home with fear of Fuzail's brother's threat lurking above us.

They knew they couldn't keep us all inside the haveli all the time, it will just be a mere act of cowardice.

The whole gym had wall mirrors on every side, wherever we look, our reflection would stare back at us from different angles. The gym was well equipped. But there was still a door, and I was sure what was behind that door, a room full of weaponry. The mere thought made me shudder at my place.

The whole gym room was carpeted along with half of it covered with exercise mat flooring. And we stood on it currently.

There in between us stood a mannequin.

"You all can see, here a structure, so first I am going to give you all a demo, and then when you've learnt, you guys will be practicing it on us." He pointed at where the guys were standing at the end.

The whole morning passed with us trying learning and practicing all over again, the ones who were watching were on treadmills or other machines, as Arman didn't want us free and occupied the whole time.

It was now 10 in the morning, and we were continuously doing exercises or stuff even before six. I was drained off all the energy. I felt as if I was all ready to faint. Ugh.

It looked as if Arman was intentionally doing this, he was making me do all the things double, not for someone who was new to all this.

I just wanted to punch him hard on his nose, haahh! I even got strength now!!

A frustrated sigh left my lips, when he stopped me after the practice. I turned around, as he waited for everyone to leave, Haya while leaving gave me worried look, but I passed her a small assuring smile, not wanting to burden her more then already she was.

"Tumhara dehan kaha tha?" He gritted, stepping forward, as I took a step back.

(Where was your mind?)

"Huh?" I asked, unable to understand what he was implying.

"You were zoning out a lot. Care to explain?" He menaced right in front of my face, his eyes glaring deep inside of me.

"No." I bluntly answered, with a sharp gaze, even though it was not even compared to how intensely he was gazing back

With a low animalistic growl. He slammed me into the nearby door.

"Kia bola tumne?" He coldly uttered. His grip on my arms painfully tightened. Whereas I hissed in pain, trying my best to push him off of me.

(What did you say?)

I didn't say a word, the pain in my arms stopping me from further making him angry more then he already was.

"Drop that attitude Noor, usse pehle ke Mai tumhare sath kuch bohat bura ker bethu." His threat was clear as the day.

(Before I do something worst with you)

But something in me snapped. How dare he! He was no sane and that clearly I found out after living with him. It was his mere act of forgiveness to lure me into his sick plans.

I pushed him with full strength left in me after a tiring morning.

"Zabardasti kerne se ziyada Kia bura kersakte Hain ap? Hath uthainge? Uthaye! Apse kuch or umeed bhi nahi Kari jaa sakti." I sneered with disgust.

(What can you do worst then forcing me? You'll raise your hand on me? Do it! Can't expect anything else even)

Arman's eyes widened a little in shock, but got soon replaced with unleashed rage. He eyed her with dark furious eyes, There was helplessness as well.

He lowered his eyes, with a clenched fists and gritted teeth, he made his way out of the gym, picking up his jacket from the floor.

The door slammed shut, then a minute later I heard a car engine starting and soon after he was gone.

I placed a hand on my mouth to stop myself from crying out loud enough for anyone to hear. I wiped my tears that escaped my eyes and opened the door to leave when I saw Bari ammi standing still, near it.

The expression on her face clearly showed that she has heard all of it.
She came near me and hugged me tightly. I placed my head in her shoulder and cried.

Maybe I just needed someone to console me.

She took me to our room, where she made me sit on the bed and then sat soon after.

Putting my head in her lap, I cried. I cried for my miserable life. I cried for my future. I cried for my life. I cried for my worst nightmare disguised as my past. I cried for the cruelty of his I faced. I cried for every single thing he did to me.

She simply let me cry, telling me everything will be fine. But deep down we both knew nothing was going to get fine. It was my fate now, how can one go against the fate?

I don't know, when but I drifted to sleep while laying my head on her lap as she caressed my hair with her fingers.

////////

I woke up, with someone knocking on the door, with a groan I sat up, placing my dupatta around me, as I was still wearing my clothes from the morning, I roamed my eyes around to find everything dark. How much did I sleep?

I opened the door, rubbing my eyes, to find Aamina standing with a frown on her face.

"Ap so rahi thi?"

(You were sleeping?)

"Nahi. Cricket khel rahi thi. Tum kyu aayi? Kheriat?" I replied sarcastically, and moved aside to let her in.

(No I was playing cricket. Why are you here?)

"Bari ammi apko bula rahi hai." She entered inside, while I made my to the closet.

(Bari ammi is calling you)

"Acha. Bas shower le ker aati hu."

(Okay. I'll just come after taking a shower)

"Wese mujhe uthaya kiu nahi pehle?" Picking a dark blue shalwar kameez, I asked.

(By the way why didn't you wake me up before?)

"Bari ammi ne mana kiya tha sab ko." She replied leisurely, whereas I just nodded

(Bari ammi asked us not to)

"Tabiyat theek hai na? I mean the way Arman Bhai was making you do all the exercises and practice?"

(You're okay?)

Noor stilled for a moment, but then shook her head and answered.

"Mai theek hu. All good." I smiled giving her a polite smile

(I am fine)

"Haya kaha hai?" Stepping into the washroom, I turned back and asked.

(Where is Haya?)

"Wo Azan or Armeen ke sath hai."

(She is with Azan and Armeen)

As soon as I nodded, Aamina left the room, leaving me alone with my thoughts. Pushing all the thoughts at the back of my mind, I made way to the shower stall, thinking of taking a peaceful shower.

////////

I made my way out when I saw Haris sitting in the living room, busy on his phone, a frown edged on his face.
As soon as his eyes landed on me, he spoke up.

"Noor? Arman ka kuch pata hai? Kaha hai wo?"

(Do you know about Arman's whereabouts? Where he is?)

It was my turn to frown.

"Nahi. Subah se Maine unko nahi dekha." I replied calmly.

(No. I haven't seen him since morning)

I made my way out from there to Bari ammi's room, as she asked for my presence.

I knocked on their door for sometime, but no one answered. I opened it to see Bari ammi praying namaz.
I smiled and went to sit next to her on the floor.

After raising her hands for Dua, she cried, asking Allah for forgiveness.

A while later. She completed her prayers and bent down to kiss my temple.

I again placed my head on her lap and layed down feeling myself at a little peace.

"Noor? Meri Jan. Kiya hua hai beta?" Her soothing voice made me relax.

(My dear. What has happened child?)

"Kuch nahi Bari ammi bas ese hi." I replied slowly, not wanting my voice to break

(Nothing, just like that)

"Noor. Mujhe pata hai tumhare or Arman ke beech Mai Kia horaha hai? Tum khush to hona?"

(I know there is something going on between you and Arman? Are you happy?)

Her question made me to question my own damn self. Was I happy? No!!!
I was far from happy, but I was not going to tell her this.

"Kuch nahi hai esa. Kuch nahi horaha hamare beech ammi."

(Nothing is like this. Nothing is happening between us)

"To tum to khush nahi hona!" It was more a statement than a question.

(But you are not happy?)

"Nahi. Mai-" I paused for a second before completed. "Mai khush hu."

(No I- i am happy)

For a while, we just sat there, staring at nothing in particular, reliving the moments. She didn't stop caressing my hair.

"Arman ne zabardasti ki hai tumhare sath." Her weak voice was an evidence of an experienced life, she was a mother, and who can suspect anything better then a mother.

(Arman has forced himself upon you)

I sat straight and looked at her, her wrinkled eyes were staring at the lamp behind me, the reflection of the light igniting the darkest of her scars and pain that was hidden deep inside of her.

Noor was quick enough to find out that she was not making eye contact because she was unsure and ashamed.
Ashamed of her son's wrong doings.

"Ap ais-." She spoke, cutting me in.

(You ar-)

"Maine khud suna tha, Noor. You can't hide this from me." Her weak voice was still edgy, as if daring me to deny her

(I heard it myself)

I placed my hand on her cheek, making her look at me, in my eyes.

"Ap tension nahi le." I was helpless now. She knew and I had know idea how to deny. She heard and she wouldn't even believe if I say otherwise.

(Don't stress yourself)

" Noor. Mujhe pata hi nahi Mai Kiya bolu! Tumhe batana chahiye tha na Chanda. Kese bardasht Kerti rahi?" A tear leaked her eye and then the rest followed.

(I don't have any idea what should I say. You should've told me dear. How did you bare it all)

I shook my head.

"Ap ko kuch kehne ki zarurat nahi hai." I wiped her tears, as I broke down too. A stray tear escaped my eye, as I saw her helpless, she was ashamed of her son. It was clear as the day.

Mujhe maaf kerdo beta. Maine bohat der kerdi. Maine kabhi tumhari ankho Mai us udasi ko samjha hi nahi. Hamesha tumhare maa baap ka dukh samajh ker taalti rahi." Her eyes reflected the pain she felt in her heart knowing her son doing wrong right under her nose.

(Please forgive me child. Its too late. I never understood the gloominess in your eyes, always took it as your parent's death)

"Kesi baatein kerrahi hai ap? Maafi to na mange."

(What are you talking about? Don't ask for forgiveness)

She placed her head in my chest. Hugging me with all her strength as tears after tears rolled down her cheek.

"Noor, beta please. Tumhara Dil itna saaf hai. Konsi neki ke badle khuda ne tumhe Meri bahu banaya."

(Your heart is pure. I don't know in exchange of which deed God sent you as my daughter in law)

She sobbed in my arms, she looked so hopeless and poor, she was going through worse. She was a beautiful soul, the way she took care of me and Azan, she was not to be blamed. It was not her fault.

"Arman ko aane do mai-" a knock on the door made her stop mid sentence. We both looked at the door.

(Let Arman come I will-)

Just as I wiped my tears, Ammar barged in with worry plastered on his face.

"Wo- ahh- Arman ka kuch pata nahi chal raha."

(We can't find anything about Arman)

I glanced at the wall clock, to see it was past one in the morning. And it was very unusual of him to stay out this late. He usually spends his nights in the study doing God knows what.

We both stood up from our places, as Ammar scrutinized our faces.

I didn't want to face any of his questions, so I just excused myself and ran out of the room, wiping my face.

Coming into the patio, I took deep breaths in, calming myself down, as i closed my eyes and tipped my head back, inhaling the fresh breeze of shabnam.

A minute later, I saw a very tensed Daniyal running out into the garage to his car parked there. Getting inside, he was talking to someone, more like ordering the person on the other end of the phone.

Starting the engine, without a care, he drifted off to God knows where, leaving a gush of dust behind.

I, after walking into the garden for sometime, made my way back inside. I was not hungry, but felt very down and guilty. The only reason I was guilty was, because I pondered over the fact that what Bari ammi knows can affect a mother son relationship very badly. I felt worst. I don't know why, but it didn't feel right, knowing, how she will take this news in.
But on the other hand i felt relieved, ad if a burden was lifted off me.

I was in no mood to talk to anyone, I just wanted to spend sometime alone, to think if I did right, making her believe her assumption, or i should've denied her thoughts and what she heard. She wouldn't have believed me on the first place.

/////////

I slammed the door shut, only to come face to face with ammi. Since how much time was she standing here? Just, how much did she hear? She gave me a disappointing look, making me believe that she heard what Noor said, and she did believe it instantly.

I went past her to the front door, and to my car, sitting inside, I started the engine and drifted off.

The whole day I spent, at my lake house, all alone, as I recalled what she said to me.

Zabardasti kerne se ziyada Kia bura kersakte Hain ap? Hath uthainge? Uthaye! Apse kuch or umeed bhi nahi Kari jaa sakti

Her each and every word stung like a hell. I didn't miss the venom and hatred for me in her eyes, I never expected her to be this fierce.

She shocked me to my core when she said that she can't expect me to not raise my hand on her.

It was the worst I felt, I knew my guilt on forcing her was real, I felt horrible myself, but listening this from her own mouth made my heart stop for a second. I felt angry on my own damn self. I knew if I would stay any longer with her in the same room, I'll fucking loose myself.

It pained like shit. Hell, I felt shit.
The whole day I stayed there, but at 8 in the night, I got a call from Haris, asking me where I was. I told him I was out for some work and then I put my phone on silent.

I didn't want any one disturbing me and my thoughts. I knew it was not good to stay there at night, all alone, so I left and came to the place where we, me and Daniyal used to come with his father.

A place where I felt at peace. The place itself made a person forget all his pain and miseries.

It was near airport, a hill top specifically, owned by me, as it belonged to the authority. The whole town which I ruled could be seen from above there. And as it was night then, the whole town was engulfed in darkness, as the lights from the houses down the lane, twinkled. The sky was filled with stars, shining far above me, yet still felt beyond beautiful. It was a sight to behold, a sight to cherish with someone very special.

I thought of Noor, how she would've reacted, if ever come up all the way here. She loved nature, that I knew for sure. The way a mere sight of our lawn made her face to glow and a smile to take place, I knew, and then I myself noticed her.

She went through a lot. Her parents died when she was a teenager, she was left behind to raise her a month old brother. Then not even after one month to her parents death, she was married off to me.

I tortured her, when I returned from the state. Tried to force her, tried to take my rights on her, but every time she got away somehow. I went back and returned again after two years, we were married then, not two weeks into marriage and I fucking raped her.

I was at a certain stage of my life where I should be taking care of my business, whereas here I was drowning into the never ending guilt, that I knew would somehow engulf me and would never leave me or my system.

I was ready to surrender myself to her, whatever she wanted I was all ready to give her. Even if it costed my fucking life I'd happily give myself to her.

I wanted to ask her what she wanted. What she was having in stored for me as a punishment.

I was ready to bare all what she throw at me, but it was killing me painfully and gradually to see her hatred. It was getting over bearing for me to see her eyes filled with hatred and despise, all only for me.

Only if I have had stopped myself that night.

I sat in the car, and started making my way back to the house, when my car broke down. Fuck my life.

Ughh. I felt like throwing the damn car into the damn bin.
Huh as if it would fit.

I opened my phone to see hundreds of calls and messages from everyone at home. Probably they will be all worried sick for me.

I called Daniyal, who just picked up, gave me straight death threats. Well people do care!

I gave him my location and told him to pick me up. Who in response ordered me to stay rooted to where I was.

/////

It was two weeks now, to that incident, the training was still going on, and still Arman showed no mercy, and tried his best to train her the best, he was worried sick for her. He was not ready to think about even leaving her.

They didn't share a word when alone, just stay reserved. Noor noticed the changes in Bari ammi's behavior and sadly Arman did too.

He was surprised when His ammi didn't kiss him on his forehead like everyday when he leaves for work, and let it slide, but when he noticed that she would leave from wherever, whenever he would come, and she stopped talking to him completely. She was deeply hurt.

She behaved normally with everyone, but she gave a cold shoulder to him, only him.

Arman couldn't bare her this silent treatment, so planned to confront her.

///////

She was sitting alone in the garden when he came and sat next to her.
He placed his hand on hers, making her known of his presence.

She was wearing a white scarf with s tasbeeh in her hand as she recited the surahs in her heart.

"Ammi."

She stood up from her place, ready to leave, when Arman held her hand and spoke almost pleadingly

"Ammi Meri ghalti Kiya hai? Maine Kiya Kia hai? Kyu kerrahi hai esa?"

(What's my fault? What have i done? Why are you doing this?)

"Mai to kuch nahi kerrahi. Koi ghalat fehmi hogi tumhe." Her voice was firm and cold, as if her son's pleading eyes did not effect her one bit.

(I am not doing anything. You're mistaken)

"Ammi mujhe koi ghalat fehmi nahi Hui. Mujhe pata hai ap mujhse naraz Hain. Mujhe wajah to bataye?"

(I am not mistaken. I know you're upset with me. But at least tell me the reason?)

He made her sit down on the bench and kneeled in front of her, holding her hand, whereas she looked away from her son's eyes, wiping her tears that leaked her eyes.

"Ammi batayena. Khuda ka wasta. Mene Kiya ghalat Kiya hai?"

(Tell me. For God's sake. What is my mistake?)

Arman loved her mother to death. She was a very pure soul with a beautiful kind heart. He couldn't see her mother in tears.

"Tumne Noor ke sath zabardasti Kari hai. Yeh ghalti Kari hai. Ghalti bhi nahi Arman, gunah Kiya hai beta."

(You forced yourself upon Noor. That what mistake you did. No it was not even mistake, you committed a sin child)

Arman sat there quietly, as he took in all what she said. So she got to know after all.

His mother's sob, broke his reverie.

"Ammi?"

"Marr gayi tumhari maa. Mujhse baat nahi krrna Arman. Door hojao Meri nazro se."

(Your mother's dead. Don't talk to me. I don't want to see your face)

Arman was left shocked, whereas his mother ran inside the haveli with tears in her eyes.

His heart clenched painfully. He had had enough. He just wanted to jump off the bridge and die and never face someone again.

///////

Noor felt tired after training, they were still learning self defense, and weren't upgraded.

The whole practice every time drained her energy. She flopped onto the bed, ready to take a nap, when door slammed open and Arman entered, with red eyes, as if he was about to cry, or as if he was going to eat her whole alive.

Just as his eyes landed upon her, she wished she had the power to get invisible, because what she saw in his eyes was far worst and horrifying, as fear crawled inside her.

The mere intensity they held made her whole being to tremble in pure anxiety of what to expect.

She knew she was doomed, but was not aware of the reason!!!

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Assalamuaikum!
I hope everyone's taking care of themselves? 
This mere update took me three days straight.

The story is reaching it's end soon. Just a few chapters left now.

I hope you liked the chapter.

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